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Contents

Foreword

Introduction

How to Use This Book

Part One: General Joke Writing

Exercise 1: Collect Fifty Great One-Liners

Exercise 2: Captioning

Exercise 3: A Little Tougher Captioning

Exercise 4: Captioning Words

Exercise 5: Gathering References

Exercise 6: In the News

Exercise 7: Turn Ideas into Jokes

Exercise 8: The Almost Right Word

Exercise 9: It’s All Around Us

Exercise 10: Inspired by Legends

Exercise 11: That Makes Perfect Nonsense

Exercise 12: Tag That Line

Exercise 13: Say It by Not Saying It

Exercise 14: Outside the Box

Exercise 15: Same Word, Different Meaning

Exercise 16: It Means What You Mean It to Mean

Exercise 17: Same Old Words, Brand-New Meaning

Exercise 18: Don’t Quit Too Soon

Exercise 19: Merely Fill in the Blanks

Exercise 20: On the Shoulders of Giants

Exercise 21: Relationships That Aren’t Really Related

Exercise 22: One Joke Begets Many

Exercise 23: Ready, Set, Write

Exercise 24: Assignment Unknown

Part Two: General Stand-Up Writing

Exercise 25: Take Good Notes

Exercise 26: Compact the Act

Exercise 27: What Are They Talking About?

Exercise 28: Writing a Chunk

Exercise 29: Writing for a Specific Person

Exercise 30: Writing in Bite-Size Chunks—Part A

Exercise 31: Writing in Bite-Size Chunks—Part B

Exercise 32: Writing in Bite-Size Chunks—Part C

Exercise 33: Now Cut Your Precious Jokes

Exercise 34: Smooth Transitions

Exercise 35: Baking a Monologue

Exercise 36: Working toward the Finish Line

Exercise 37: Now Write

Exercise 38: Roast a Friend

Exercise 39: Write Whatever So-and-So Wants

Exercise 40: That’s Handy

Exercise 41: There Are Two Sides to Every Topic

Exercise 42: Late-Night TV

Exercise 43: Be Prepared

Exercise 44: Learn to Overwrite

Exercise 45: Pick Your Best

Exercise 46: Not Done Yet

Exercise 47: Killing Dead Time

Part Three: Writing for Your Mentor

Exercise 48: Pick Your Mentor

Exercise 49: The Best of Your Mentor

Exercise 50: Let Your Mentor Mentor

Exercise 51: You’ve Been Hired

Exercise 52: Waste Not, Want Not

Exercise 53: Find the Right Formula

Exercise 54: Hello, Good-bye

Exercise 55: Tailor-Made

Exercise 56: Dedicated Chunk

Exercise 57: Where Did That Come From?

Exercise 58: Strengthen the Weaknesses

Exercise 59: Strengthen the Strengths

Exercise 60: Let It Sit

Exercise 61: Special Appearances

Exercise 62: On the Couch

Exercise 63: Talk Spot

Exercise 64: Become Your Mentor

Exercise 65: Make It Tighter

Exercise 66: Make It Tighter Still

Part Four: Sketch Writing

Exercise 67: Where Did It Come From?

Exercise 68: That’s Where It Came From

Exercise 69: My Life Is Made Up of Sketches

Exercise 70: At the Movies

Exercise 71: And the Story Goes

Exercise 72: Classic Jokes

Exercise 73: Words of Wisdom

Exercise 74: That Really Bugs Me

Exercise 75: Develop One

Exercise 76: Hog-Tied Guests

Exercise 77: Book Your Guests

Exercise 78: Bigger Than Life

Exercise 79: Boob Tube

Exercise 80: Commercial Writing

Exercise 81: There’s More to It Than That

Exercise 82: Oh That’s Good

Exercise 83: The Road Runner Sketch

Exercise 84: The Silent Sketch

Exercise 85: Words, Words, Words

Exercise 86: All Good Things Must Come to an End

Exercise 87: Curtain and Applause

Part Five: Sitcom Writing

Exercise 88: Pop Quiz

Exercise 89: Open-Book Test

Exercise 90: Who Says What?

Exercise 91: What Could Possibly Happen?

Exercise 92: Same with Sitcoms

Exercise 93: Get Your Story Straight

Exercise 94: Get Your Story Changed

Exercise 95: Get Your Story Straight—Again

Exercise 96: Another Questionnaire

Exercise 97: Add Some Funny

Exercise 98: Keep That Story Moving

Exercise 99: Put Another Bump in the Road

Exercise 100: On the Set

Exercise 101: Make It Shorter

Exercise 102: Write the “Bible”

Exercise 103: Write Your Own “Bible”

Exercise 104: Turn the Tables on Your Characters

Exercise 105: It Can’t Get Any Worse

Exercise 106: What’d You Say?

Exercise 107: Switch

Exercise 108: A Good Old Story

Exercise 109: A Good Joke

Exercise 110: A Good Old Cliché

Exercise 111: That Really Irks Me

Exercise 112: Finished Project

Exercise 113: “A Martian Wouldn’t Say That”

Exercise 114: “A Different Martian Wouldn’t Say That, Either”

Exercise 115: Just Do It

Comedy Writing Self-Taught Workbook

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