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1 1 The Colbert Report, October 18, 2007.

2 2 The Rush Limbaugh Show, www.rushlimbaugh.com.

3 3 LaMarre, H.L., Landreville, K.D., and Beam, M.A. (2009). The irony of satire: political ideology and the motivation to see what you want to see in The Colbert Report . The International Journal of Press/Politics 14: 212.

4 4 Wilstein, M. (2019). Stephen Colbert: I Could Never Play Right‐Wing “Colbert Report” Character Under Trump. Daily Beast. https://www.thedailybeast.com/stephen‐colbert‐i‐could‐never‐play‐colbert‐report‐character‐under‐trump (November 8, 2019).

5 5 See Kurtz, H. . (2005). Tv's Newest Anchor: A Smirk in Progress. Washington Post. http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp‐dyn/content/article/2005/10/09/AR2005100901551.html (October 10, 2005). See also Bierly, M. . (2006). Show Off. Entertainment Weekly. http://www.ew.com/ew/article/0,,677356,00.html. (July 22, 2006).

6 6 “The Daily Show … unwittingly paid ‘Jordan Klepper’ to be a mole against them. They had no idea I was playing them this whole time … I played them so hard. I learned their liberal ways, I donated to their liberal causes, I voted for their liberal candidates … ‘This [pointing to a picture of himself in the same clothes] is not a character. This is the real me.’” The Opposition, September 25, 2017.

7 7 Bradley, L. (2017). Your First Look at Jordan Klepper's Alex Jones‐Inspired Late‐Night Show. Vanity Fair. https://www.vanityfair.com/hollywood/2017/08/jordan‐klepper‐comedy‐central‐show‐trailer‐the‐opposition (August 23, 2017).

8 8 Bradley, “Your First Look at Jordan Klepper's Alex Jones‐Inspired Late‐Night Show.”

9 9 Wilstein, M. (2019). Jordan Klepper Loved Watching Alex Jones Admit That He's ‘Playing a Character. Daily Beast. https://www.thedailybeast.com/jordan‐klepper‐loved‐watching‐alex‐jones‐admit‐that‐hes‐playing‐a‐character (May 29, 2019).

10 10 Tarrant, D. (2018). Why Do People Listen to Infowars' Alex Jones At All? We Asked Them. The Dallas Morning News. https://www.dallasnews.com/news/texas/2018/08/10/why‐do‐people‐listen‐to‐infowars‐alex‐jones‐at‐all‐we‐asked‐them (August 10, 2018).

11 11 The Opposition, September 25, 2017.

12 12 Strong, S. and Schapiro, R. (2009). Missing Link Found? Scientists Unveil Fossil of 47‐Million‐Year‐Old Primate, Darwinius Masillae. New York Daily News. http://www.nydailynews.com/news/us_world/2009/05/19/2009‐05‐19_missing_link_found_fossil_of_47_millionyearold_primate_sheds_light_on_.html (May 19, 2009).

13 13 The Colbert Report, May 21, 2009.

14 14 Colbert, S. (2007). I Am America (And So Can You!) . New York: Grand Central Publishing.

15 15 Of course, you can find philosophers who disagree about whether there are facts about the taste of Baconnaise and whether Colbert is funny. If they are right, my point is all the stronger – for even these things are not relative.

16 16 The Colbert Report, October 26, 2005.

17 17 In case you think there is a universal truth in this matter, keep in mind that “love marriages” end in divorce more often than “arranged marriages.” Of course, this might be due to social pressures instead of marital bliss – such things are hard to tell. But that one kind of marriage is more moral than another is far from clear.

18 18 The Colbert Report, April 27, 2009.

19 19 The Colbert Report, May 27, 2008.

20 20 My examples here are all applying American moral intuitions to practices outside of its boarders. That is because I am writing to Americans. I do not mean to imply that American moral values are somehow superior to the rest of the world. We do plenty of things wrong. For example, my guess is, in the near future, the American banning of gay marriage will be used as an example of something that was clearly morally wrong despite the majority consensus.

21 21 The Colbert Report, February 12, 2009.

22 22 The Colbert Report, July 31, 2006.

23 23 To be fair, there are non‐naive versions of relativism out there defended by very smart people – Gilbert Harman of Princeton, for one. For example, see Harman, G. (1975). Moral relativism defended. The Philosophical Review 84: 3–22.

24 24 Locke, J. (1978). An Essay Concerning Human Understanding , 291. New York: Dutton.

25 25 The Colbert Report, October 17, 2005.

26 26 CBS News. (2006). The Word of the Year: Truthiness. https://www.cbsnews.com/news/the‐word‐of‐the‐year‐truthiness (December 6, 2006).

27 27 Locke, 291.

28 28 The Colbert Report, March 20, 2007.

29 29 Gladwell, M. (2005). Blink . New York: Little, Brown and Company.

30 30 See Abbott, A. (2015). Unconscious Thought Not So Smart After All. Scientific American. https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/unconscious‐thought‐not‐so‐smart‐after‐all1 (January 28, 2015). See also Clancy, K. and Kreig, P. (2007). Your Gut is Still Not Smarter Than Your Head: How Disciplined, Fact‐Based Marketing Can Drive Extraordinary Growth and Profits . Hoboken: Wiley.

31 31 Peirlott, M. (2009). Truth, truthiness, and bullshit for the American voter. In: Stephen Colbert and Philosophy (ed. A. Schiller ), 77–94. Chicago: Open Court.

32 32 Peirlott, 83.

33 33 Peirlott, 91.

34 34 Colbert called them out on this, The Colbert Report, March 3, 2009.

35 35 This is Ethan Mills' conclusion in (2009). Truthiness and the appearances. In: Stephen Colbert and Philosophy (ed. A. Schiller ), 95–114. Open Court.

36 36 For a readable debunking of this myth, see Lanese, N. (2020). Why vitamin C won't “boost” your immune system against the coronavirus. Live Science. https://www.livescience.com/coronavirus‐vitamin‐c‐myth.html (March 10, 2020).

37 37 Do moral rights always create moral duties? There are those who contest the issue. See Feinberg, J. (1973). Social Philosophy , 61–64. Englewood Cliffs, NJ: Prentice‐Hall, Inc. .

38 38 The Colbert Report, April 8, 2009.

39 39 Whyte, J. (2004). Crimes Against Logic , 1–10. New York: McGraw‐Hill.

40 40 Which he did in The Colbert Report, June 8–11, 2009.

41 41 Whyte, 9.

42 42 Colbert, S. (2006). White House Correspondents Dinner. (29 April 2006).

43 43 Colbert (2007), 120, 122.

44 44 The Colbert Report, October 17, 2005.

45 45 Colbert (2007), 126.

46 46 Rabin, N. (2006). [An Interview with] Stephen Colbert. A.V. Club. http://www.avclub.com/articles/stephen‐colbert,13970 (January 25, 2006).