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ONE

SUPERPOWER OF THANKFULNESS

5,000 Gifts

Gratitude produces deep, abiding joy because we know that God is working in us, even through difficulties.—Charles Stanley1

I laced up my running shoes, grabbed my water bottle and iPhone, and sluggishly headed out for my 5-kilometre walk. There was no bounce in my step on this hot summer day, but I was determined to use this next hour to listen to my pastor’s latest sermon. With all my travelling, I had missed yet another church service, and I wanted to stay connected to the church’s teaching series.

During my hikes, the landscape was usually breathtaking, but that day I was oblivious to the beauty—all I wanted to do was check “take walk” off my to-do list. Finally, I plugged into my cellphone, and the church service sounds erupted. The worship team opened with “Raise a Hallelujah,” and unprompted, my step quickened. I was bouncing. The music and song lyrics injected life, hope, and new energy, and I came alive with praise: my hands were in the air, and I was singing off-key. Tears streamed down my face as my heart overflowed with thanksgiving for the worship songs that opened my eyes and transformed my bland day into one of renewed awe of the majesty and beauty of God’s magnificent landscape. I was reminded that praise and thanksgiving invite the presence of God. They have the power to stop the enemy’s fiery darts and empower the spirit to rise above the drudgery of life to ignite new possibilities and spark joy—even if they don’t change the circumstance or scenery. Our thanksgiving and praise are like drops of water falling into an empty rain barrel to refill it and remind us of the Father’s love. They widen our understanding of the grace and freedom in Christ. We expect people, career positions, creative comforts, and adventure to give us joy, but these things mostly leave us gasping for air. We need to cultivate thanksgiving so we can have the pleasure of joy.

Thankfulness Is a Superpower

Ten years prior to Jack’s death in November 2016, God taught me the power of thankfulness. On September 12, 2010, six days before Jack and I were scheduled to speak at conferences in three different cities in Poland, Jack was diagnosed with gall bladder cancer. The surgeon’s explanation of the grim prognosis shook our world. The half-packed suitcases lying on our bedroom floor were a mocking reminder of how quickly life changes. Then there was the gripping angst of the prospect of becoming a widow for the second time. While Jack and I endured the seemingly endless doctors’ visits and wait times for x-rays, MRIs, and surgeon’s appointments, I desperately looked for hope and peace in God’s Word.

Everywhere I turned in the Bible, I encountered verses on thankfulness. It was as though God illuminated the words and they jumped off the pages. I couldn’t get away from them. As I lingered over the verses, they infused me with hope and stirred up new energy.

• “Let your roots grow down into him, and let your lives be built on him. Then your faith will grow strong in the truth you were taught, and you will overflow with thankfulness” (Col. 2:7 NLT.)

• “Since we are receiving a Kingdom that is unshakable, let us be thankful and please God by worshiping him with holy fear and awe” (Heb. 12:28 NLT).

• “Let us come before him with thanksgiving. Let us sing songs of praise to him” (Ps. 95:2 NLT).

• “The Lord is my strength and shield. I trust him with all my heart. He helps me, and my heart is filled with joy. I burst out in songs of thanksgiving” (Ps. 28:7 NLT).

Then the verse that rocked my world was “Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus” (1 Thess. 5:16–18). I’d seen this verse numerous times, but my soul’s vision had shifted. The words “for this is God’s will for you” shook me to the core, and I knew I needed to dig deeper. When I drill into new biblical territory, I start by studying the main word in the original Greek. “Joyful” is translated from chairete. The Greek root is often translated “to rejoice, be glad.”

When I’m thankful and I turn my eyes toward Christ to ponder his love and goodness, my soul and my perspective shift to give me a revelation of something bigger than myself. Ellen Vaughn, in her book Radical Gratitude, expresses this so well: “It’s incredible: The small, compliant human action of saying ‘thank you’ constantly links us to the awesome Creator of the universe. In the practice of perceiving every part of every day as a gift from Him, we stay connected to Christ … as we thank God for His presents, we remain in His presence.”2

This new insight was like a clearer pair of glasses, opening my eyes and heart to a hidden secret. My joy would return if I gave thanks. That’s all I wanted: simple joy.

With all my heart I believed God’s Word to be true, and I cracked the first pages of my new “thankful journal.” To keep the concept simple and uncluttered, I numbered my entries and kept them to one line each. In the days after Jack’s collapse in the kitchen, during his time in ICU, and in the ensuing dark days around the funeral, I was determined to stay thankful. Here are some of my numbered entries from my thankful journal:

2909. In the midst of ripping pain, I feel peace

2910. Michelle dropped everything and flew in from Florida

2911. Janice and Brendon were here in hours

2915. People who bring coffee or tea

2918. The way my children love me

2919. Reading Jack’s prayer journal

2920. People who bring food

2923. Alex hugging me

2924. Laughter in the midst of tears

2929. Tim, who took over all the family responsibilities for the last two weeks

2930. Our matching plaid shirts

2934. Everyone went back home safely

2936. Going on a walk with the boys

2938. Reading hundreds of cards

2942. Making it through my first church service

2946. People who really care

On May 6, 2019, I reached journal entry number 5,000. Looking back and reflecting over these words since Jack’s death, I was amazed that God’s command to be thankful is true: it restored my joy.

Please don’t think for a moment that this came easily. For thanksgiving and joy to become a reality, I had to fight against my heart’s inclination to linger in pain, worry, and feeling lost or alone. It took deliberate choices to stop and number my thankfulness. In fact, it was so hard that three months after Jack’s death I crashed into a pit of darkness and was diagnosed with PTSD. There were days when all I could write was “I got out of bed today” or “today I put on some makeup and bought groceries.” I concur with David in the psalms: “Hour by hour I place my days in your hand” (Ps. 31:15 MSG). If we want joy, we must fight for it using a powerful tool available to all of us: the superpower of thankfulness.

Thankfulness is a cultivated discipline that comes from the realization that God’s boundless grace does not entitle one to his blessing and joy, and it doesn’t mean I deserve it. But, as God’s adopted daughter and a recipient of God’s heavenly blessings, I need to turn to him and say thank you.

Take Care of Your Heart

To experience deep joy in any circumstance, we must prepare—by learning and cultivating—our soul for storms. Suffering and storms are normal, so, when these difficult times come, we must be ready. We can’t run a successful triathlon or climb Mount Everest unless we train; we won’t have a vibrant marriage unless we learn humility, forgiveness, and grace; and we won’t have a retirement fund unless we save and invest. When an unexpected storm blows in, how can we tap into deep joy if we haven’t invested in deep soul care? Let’s explore this further with a story wherein paying attention to details could have averted a huge disaster.

It was a harrowing experience for 1,373 passengers and crew members of the Viking Sky, a luxury cruise ship from the Norwegian company Viking Cruise, when it encountered a violent storm. Normally that is not a problem for large cruise ships. But in this case, with waves up to eight metres high smacking the ship, the engines were disabled when they ran out of lubricating oil to keep the engines running. After suffering a power blackout, the Viking Sky sent out a mayday call. The Associated Press reported that “passengers [recalled] a large wave crashing through glass doors and knocking people across the floor of an area where they were instructed to gather as a muster point.” The waves were too high to evacuate the ship by rescue boats, so five helicopters evacuated 479 passengers, winching up passengers one by one as winds howled in the dark night. After the storm, the ship travelled to a Norwegian port under its own power.3

This is a victorious end to a disaster story, but I can’t imagine being a passenger on a gorgeous luxury cruise liner tossed around in heavy seas due to engine failure caused by a lack of oil. Wow, all this unnecessary angst and extra cost because someone forgot to check the oil levels. Paying attention to details could have averted a huge disaster.

To prepare for ensuing storms—and they will come—we must have a settled assurance that God is on our side, he is a good God, and he wants us to live out our very best life. We must learn to trust his word: “If God is for us, who can be against us?” (Rom. 8:31). In her book Choose Joy, Kay Warren simply states,

When your heart does not see the goodness of God, you’re not going to say thank you to him. You’re not going to experience joy because you’re putting your energy into what you don’t have, what you don’t like about your life, what you wish was different. You ignore all that God has already done and will continue to do in your life.4

The Norwegian luxury ship encountered an avoidable disaster because the crew workers in charge of the engine were unprepared. Inattentiveness leaves us wide open to unnecessary pain.

After my first husband, Dick, died, my friend Darlene and I had a raw conversation about how we learn to cope when disaster strikes. She openly admitted, “Heidi, if something like that ever happens to me, I hope I have the deep faith that you do.” Not long after this conversation, her daughter died suddenly while asleep. My friend had not taken the time to nurture her heart and build her faith. She was left bereft, floating aimlessly and helplessly. Too often people tell me, “I really want to read my Bible and learn to pray, but I just don’t have the time.” My question to you is, When will you have the time? Will you have time after the disaster strikes? To find abiding joy during any circumstance or storm, we must learn to prepare.

Throughout the Bible, the metaphor of oil represents the work of the Holy Spirit and God’s power. To get ready for our storms, we must soak ourselves in this oil, and it starts by taking care of the most important aspect of our being—our heart. The Bible tells us, “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it” (Prov. 4:23). Here are six ways to get started:

• Invite the Holy Spirit to inhabit every part of your spirit to help you discern God’s truth versus Satan’s insidious lies.

• Read the Bible and memorize key verses to be your anchors and reminders of God’s goodness when your world falls apart.

• Learn to trust God by communicating with him through prayer.

• Joy is like a muscle we need to exercise. Learn to cultivate a thankful heart. Gratitude produces more emotional energy than any other attitude. Grateful people are the happiest and most content people I know.

• Join a Bible study group and connect to like-minded people who are also on a quest to find spiritual strength and power.

• Study the work of the oil of the Holy Spirit.

Then stand amazed at the unexplainable work of the Holy Spirit, who lives within you to give you power to overcome the difficult seasons in your life. Our awesome God wants to be your helper and to guide you through every storm. It doesn’t mean you won’t feel excruciating pain, disappointment, rejection, or failure. But it does mean you don’t have to walk through the storms alone. You’ll have someone interceding for you, strengthening you, giving you hope, and reminding you of your purpose and ability to unleash the beautiful fruit of the spirit—the fruit of joy.

Cindy Keating:

Bad News Blues and Celebrating Everything

Cindy Keating is a friend I meet for coffee every couple of months to share the ups and downs of being an author. When she shared her story of 47 book proposal rejections, I was blown away by the way she handled it. Here are her words:

It was a simple challenge, or so I thought. My theme word for the year had sparked a practical idea for a way for my family and me to celebrate our simple life moments together throughout the year. “We’ll light a sparkler,” I said. “We’ll talk about all the things that happen so we can decide together what to acknowledge as extra special. This will be a good way for us to celebrate the things that are meaningful to each of us in different ways.”

“But what kinds of things should we notice?” my eldest asked.

“Anything!” I replied. “We can celebrate how hard you studied for a spelling test. We can celebrate the completion of one of your piano pieces. We can celebrate how kind you were to a friend at school or how respectful you’re being to your teacher. It can be anything!” Everyone was on board. I knew it was going to be a great learning opportunity for all of us.

The email opened with “Dear Cindy, I’m sorry to say”—and my heart sank. I closed my computer immediately and didn’t even bother reading the rest of the email because I knew what it would say. This was my forty-seventh rejection. All rejection emails were the same, and even though I thought I was used to the dismissals, for some reason this one still stung.

As I sat there discouraged, contemplating what to do next, a sparkler flashed through my mind. With God’s perfect timing, I knew exactly what to do. I marched upstairs.

“Boys, we’re lighting a sparkler for Mommy’s book!” I exclaimed.

“What? Are you serious? Has an agent contacted you?” my husband enthusiastically asked.

“Does someone like your book, Mommy?” my youngest squealed as he jumped around the kitchen.

“Good job, Mommy!” my eldest piped in while flinging open the cupboard to find a sparkler. I quieted them and motioned for them to sit down at the kitchen table. Then I proceeded to tell them what had happened. Naturally, my husband was sad for me, but my kids? Their confused expressions were priceless. “You want to celebrate your rejection?” they sang in unison. I was second-guessing the idea, but I knew it was a teachable moment too beautiful to ignore.

“Sometimes celebrating the meaningful things in our lives won’t always involve happy emotions,” I explained. “Mommy’s not happy she got rejected. In fact, I’m sad that the journey is taking longer than I thought, and I’m realizing how hard the road really is. But I am happy that I can come upstairs, tell you guys how I feel, and know that, no matter what any agent says or thinks about me as a writer, you guys will still love and support me. I think that’s something worth celebrating, don’t you?”

The conversation that followed brought tears to my eyes. This simple challenge, which we started as a family a few short months ago, had suddenly turned into a deeply touching and profoundly moving journey about true joy and the power of celebrating all moments in our lives.

“Okay, I know!” offered my eldest. “We can celebrate how hard you’ve been working for these agents.”

“And we can celebrate how kind and respectful you’re being even though your heart is hurting, Mommy,” my youngest suggested.

My husband chimed in, “And we can celebrate the profound influence you’re having on your boys’ lives right now—mine included.”

So that’s exactly what we celebrated.

We lit four sparklers that day because that’s what joy does—it flips discouragement, rejection, sadness, confusion, and heaviness right side up and upside down and graciously offers us a fresh perspective and a whole new way to view and live in the world.5

Grow Your Joy

After I heard Cindy’s story, I was amazed that, 47 rejections later, Cindy was still writing, smiling, and trusting that God would connect her with the right publisher. That’s what thankfulness does. It elevates our thoughts to a higher level and takes the stance that, despite what life throws at us, we can choose to stay joyful.

1. Get rid of stuff. A large part of our present generation is obsessed with shopping and having more. “I’ll be happy when I have __________.” And so we shop and stockpile, rent off-site containers or storage sheds, and fill and label Tupperware boxes until we lose sight of all we have. But here’s the hard news: overabundance robs us of joy. Instead of enjoying our stuff, we become stuff managers. Excess stuff confuses and distracts us, and the more we have, the less we value what we have.

Growing up, I had two pairs of shoes: one pair for school and the other for church. I wonder if other parents also said, as mine did, “Heidi, pick up your feet. Don’t scuff your shoes.” I still remember the smell of the shoe polish when it was brought out of the cupboard every Saturday to polish our shoes. Today, I have over 50 pairs of shoes, but I probably don’t value them as much as I should, because I can always go and buy more. The pleasure of acquisition is fleeting. Soon, the next purchase becomes another piece to dust, to keep track of, or to organize. Overabundance destroys value. We need to get rid of our excess stuff, simplify our life, be thankful, and enjoy what we have.

Kerry and Chris Shook, in their book One Month to Live, express that point so clearly: “When we are thankful, we become content and full of the peace that only He can provide. Focusing on how grateful we are for what we have prevents us from becoming bitter and greedy for more.”6

2. Learn to be content. To grow joy, we must learn to be thankful for what we have in the moment. The apostle Paul endured beatings, shipwrecks, hunger, and spiritual storms while he was in chains for Christ. When he wrote the letter to the Philippians, he wasn’t sitting on a beach in Maui, but still he exclaimed, “I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation” (Phil. 4:12). Wow. To be content with whatever we have is a learned process. It does not come naturally. But if we’re always on the lookout for temporary happiness, we won’t find ultimate contentment. Why? Because happiness demands a certain outcome. If I get that man, I win, and I’m happy. If I get that job (or that house, or that car), I’ll be happy. We have momentary feelings of pleasure and success when things are going our way. Each time we attain our happiness goal, we raise the bar, because we’re never satisfied. We get desensitized to the norm because there is always more.

When we let go of our desire for a particular result we can find joy in the rhythms of everyday life. For example, happiness says, “I will be happy if this meal or project turns out the way I anticipate.” But joy says, “I’m enjoying every step in this process. If it turns out great, we’ll all enjoy it. If it doesn’t, it won’t be the end of the world.” Joy is not a response to an outcome; it is a fruit of the Holy Spirit within us. Joy comes from being connected to our creator. Learning to trust God for the ending to our stories is a huge first step to finding contentment.

Mark Batterson gets right to the point in his book If: “Joy is not getting what you want; it’s appreciating what you have. And in some cases, it requires wanting less! You’ve got to find fulfillment in the simple pleasures.”7

3. Remember the great things. Let’s proclaim God’s goodness the same way David did: “The Lord has done great things for us, and we are filled with joy” (Ps. 126:3). No matter what our circumstances, if we remember what God has done for us, it changes our perspective.

I facilitate a grief-sharing group, and one of the most difficult topics begs an answer for “why did God let this happen to me?” This question drains the energy and life out of the room. I’m acquainted with raw grief, so I let the participants lament, tell their stories, and express their pain. But it would be unfair and unkind for me to leave them in that vulnerable state. So I gently prod them to remember “the great things God has done for them” in spite of their unanswered and gut-wrenching question. Eventually the silence breaks, and I hear things like

• He had dementia, so I do know it was time for him to go. I’m glad he’s now free and healthy.

• My son dealt with depression and was an addict, so perhaps this was God’s gift—releasing him from his pain.

• I thank God for the people who surrounded me with love during my darkest hours.

The atmosphere changes dramatically as praise and thanksgiving erupt spontaneously: “I thank God for the colour of the leaves in the parking lot”; “I thank God for this group and the openness to share”; “I thank Barb for offering to bring me a meal”; “I am grateful that I’m able to start cleaning out my husband’s closet.” The laments turn into longing for healing and hope, and energy returns to the room.

When we stop and give thanks for the good things God has done and raise a hallelujah amid our pain or questions, new hope arises, and joy is right on its heels.

4. Pursue physical joy. I love the way God created each of us. Not only does thankfulness give us fresh joy and energy; it also revives us physically. Here’s what Rick Warren says in his book God’s Power to Change Your Life: “Psychologists say that gratitude is the healthiest emotion. Hans Seyle, the father of stress studies, claimed that gratitude produces more emotional energy than any other attitude. Haven’t you found it to be true that the people who are the most grateful are the happiest people you know?”8

There are amazing benefits of thankfulness, and many of them focus on our physical well-being. According to a 2011 study published in Applied Psychology: Health and Well-Being, researchers found that participants fell asleep faster and stayed asleep longer after spending 15 minutes jotting down what they’re grateful for in a journal before bedtime. It benefits the heart, boosts your immune system, and protects you from negative emotions. Go ahead—Google “benefits of thankfulness,” and your jaw will drop at the significant results.

So, what’s stopping you from being thankful and raising a hallelujah amid your unpredictably wonderful life?

I made a commitment to myself that I will choose to be thankful until I take my last breath. Right now, my goal is to reach ten thousand reasons to praise God in the middle of whatever circumstances come my way. Come along and join me on this journey. Thankfulness is the superpower of fresh joy. A grateful heart is a heart that is content and free, and it primes the brain for healing and miracles.