Читать книгу Circus - Irma Venter - Страница 16

Johannesburg, June 1988

“Addie, come on!” Sandra’s voice cuts shrilly through the dark.

“Shh,” I hiss. “You’ll wake my mom.”

Straddling the windowsill, I hitch up my black dress, swing my right leg over and slide down to the concrete path. Carefully I push my bedroom window shut.

I hurry across the ice-cold grass, shoes in hand. Tippy, the Du Toits’ pavement special, barks at me through the slack wire fence of the neighbouring house. Besides the yapping and the Ford Cortina’s hoarse idling, it’s surprisingly quiet for Jan Hofmeyer at ten-thirty in the evening.

“Shut up!” Sandra snarls at the dog.

I get into the back of the cream-coloured car. Peet flicks his cigarette butt through the window and gives me a smile. “Howzit? Your ma dossing?”

I nod. I don’t want to talk about her. She was discharged from Tara Psychiatric Hospital yesterday and is happy to be home.

My dad is home too, but in the garage, as usual. It’s his safe haven, the place he flees to when my mom finally manages to fall sleep. He’ll come to check that I’m in bed, then work in there till the early hours.

Or, if Peet is to be believed, spend his time paging through the latest girlie mag.

“Go,” I urge.

“You don’t feel like driving?” Peet asks.

There’s laughter in his voice. Last week I nearly took out a traffic light while he was teaching me to drive.

“Hilarious.”

Sandra leans back, squeezes my knee. “You okay? You look wasted.”

I do the laundry, cook and write exams. Where would I find time to sleep?

“Stop talking crap, let’s go!” I slip my stilettos on.

“Where to?” Peet asks as he pulls away.

“Roxy’s,” Sandra and I sing out together.

“That sleazy joint with the crappy music? Again?”

“It’s not sleazy,” I protest. “Besides, Daisy will get us in. Not all of us are eighteen, like you. And the brandy and Coke is cheap, remember?”

“Is she still teaching you her circus tricks?”

I keep silent. Next thing it’ll be all over school. And circus tricks can mean anything to schoolboys practically exhaling testosterone.

Peet drives with his right hand on the wheel and his left hand on the gear lever, just like his dad. He’s driving too fast. Modest homes flash past, then slightly bigger ones, until we reach the heart of the city with its tall grey blocks of flats and office buildings, the Hillbrow Tower keeping watch over the neon-lit, noisy streets.

I catch Peet’s eyes in the rearview mirror. “What’s bugging you?” I ask.

Sandra puts her hand on his thigh and speaks over her shoulder. “His dad wants him to join the police.”

“And you don’t want to?” I ask. “Might be better than the army.”

Peet gives an ugly laugh and lights a cigarette. His whole family smokes, so no one will know he’s been sneaking a cigarette in his dad’s car.

“That’s exactly what my dad says. The fight is no longer in Namibia or Angola, he says, it’s here. In the townships.” He draws deeply on the cigarette. “Fuck them all. My dad, the bloody government, the fucking ANC. They’re all arseholes.”

“You can always fail matric again,” Sandra suggests.

“No ways.” He laughs again, his mouth suddenly vulnerable. “All this shit, the riots, the bombs; it’s not going to stop in a year. It’ll take decades to clean up this mess.”

“Get out,” I say. “Like Johan.”

“They picked him up in Walvis. He’s in jail. We all have to go fight this fucking war. What for, I ask you?”

He rolls down the window. The wind whips through the car. I shiver, wrap my arms around my body. I should have dressed more warmly.

Sandra looks at Peet, a resigned expression on her face. In the passing street lights I see that her curly brown hair is tousled and her mascara smudged. I’d rather not know what they got up to in the backseat earlier.

“And you?” Peet asks. “Are you really going to study after matric?”

“I want to, yes. It looks as if I’ll be getting a bursary. I just have to study hard next year and get a good pass.”

“And one day you’re going to London,” Sandra says. “Or Amsterdam. That’s what you’ve always wanted to do.” She pulls down the sun visor, inspects herself in the mirror and applies fresh lipstick. “At least one of us is going to get out of here.”