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Persuasion techniques and confidence go hand in hand. If your confidence is low, you will not be able to persuade people.

Becoming more confident is something that we must work towards through careful, conscious self-analysis and repeated effort.

True communication extends well beyond the words that come out of our mouths. It encompasses the personal style we choose to project, the body language and mannerisms we put forth, as well as the sub-conscious cues we give to others about our personalities and mental states.

As an example, try to remember the last time you met someone new. Chances are you took in a great deal more detail about this person than you might initially think.

Beyond the specific words they used, you probably also noticed how they were dressed, what their demeanor was like and how comfortable you felt around them.

Each of these specific elements occurred because of the communication this person was using.

Now, reverse this situation. Whenever you encounter new people – or even interact with the people you already know, they are interpreting this same information about you.

Though the thought of others subconsciously processing so much information about you might seem scary, the upside is that being aware of this process gives us the opportunity to control our communications and appear more confident.

To start doing this effectively, we use an exercise that shifts our perceptual positions.

Essentially, through this activity, you imagine your own past behaviors from three positions – your own point of view, the point of view of your conversation partner and from the point of view of an outsider.

Start by calling up the memory of a past situation in which you felt uncomfortable.

Try to recreate in your mind every detail of the encounter.

What were you wearing, and how did these clothes make you feel?

What specific words did you say?

How did you say these words and where did you stumble in your conversation?

What can you remember of your body language?

At first, try to recreate the experience from your own point of view and highlight the specific instances where you felt you were not coming across as confident. Then, imagine how the person you were interacting with viewed the situation.

To change your point of view, envision yourself interacting with the less confident you – again, making note of instances where you perceive this version of you coming across as uncomfortable.

Finally, imagine the entire process a third time from the point of view of an outsider.

If you randomly came across two people interacting in this way, what conclusions could you draw about the participants?

What specific behaviors do you notice that makes one party appear less confident than the other?

Examining a specific past experience in this way should give you a good idea of a few potential behaviors that can be changed in order to make you appear more confident.

To bring about these specific changes, we can use a swap technique.

This exercise enables your mind to quickly swap between unconfident and confident behaviors, allowing you to appear more assertive in any situation you would like.

The first step in this process is to envision one specific instance where you felt awkward or uncomfortable in your mind.

Fully experience this moment, allowing yourself to feel the physiological symptoms of anxiety, the sense of embarrassment and the feelings of low self-esteem that define the “less confident” you.

Now, set that picture aside, and create a different image in your mind – one of you coming across as assertive and confident in your interactions with others.

If you can call upon a particular memory in which you felt this way, that is great. If not, create your own vision of what confidence feels like, allowing yourself to experience every element of this sensation.

Once you have these two images in your mind, go to a neutral place and relax for a few minutes before calling up the first mental image. Then, swap the pictures in your mind.

Repeat this process several times until the positive image begins to feel more natural to you than the negative one. Whenever you find yourself feeling uncomfortable, repeat this mental swap, and immediately are transported to a state of mind that allows you to act in a confident manner, in any situation.

Some tips on how to be a highly confident persuader:

Persuasion Technique # 1: Be unwavering and resolute in your purpose.

You have got to stand by your objective and never let other people forcefully persuade you into agreeing with them. However, this does not mean you remain stiff and inflexible if new data or proof has been presented. Even if you still do not like their idea, at least appear to consider their opinion in your decision. This shows respect and humility.

Persuasion Technique # 2: You also have to be passionate with your words and body language.

When you show enthusiasm, people are more likely to be influenced because you make it seem like you are so sure about your idea.

Persuasion Technique # 3: Never be discouraged.

Prepare your message well and stay focused on your target. Explain to them the valid reasons why you want or do not want to do something. If they stayed silent to make you feel uncomfortable, do not just agree with what they want. Keep your cool. Talk to them again and tell them that your decision is final. If they frown, fold their arms, take a deep breath, or shake their heads, apply the same procedure. Be confident while communicating and stay unaffected by their distracting moves or actions.

Persuasion Technique # 4: Get as much space as you can to be perceived as confident.

Spread your arms and legs in a graceful manner. You will be perceived as an authority in command. However, exuding confidence does not mean you show the world how great you are or boast about your “achievements.” Insecure people do that to make up for their lack of ability or empty feeling. Do not be arrogant. Maintain your confidence at all times, and your persuasion techniques will bring powerful results.