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MONSIEUR DE POURCEAUGNAC
ACT I
SCENE III. – JULIA, ÉRASTE, NÉRINE

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Jul. Oh dear, Éraste! take care that we are not discovered. I am so afraid of being seen with you; all would be lost after the command I have received to the contrary.

Era. I see nobody about.

Jul. (to Nérine). Just keep watch, Nérine, and be careful that nobody comes.

Ner. (going to the farther end of the stage). Trust me for that: and say all you have to say to each other.

Jul. Have you thought of anything to favour our plan, Éraste? And do you think that we shall succeed in breaking off that marriage which my father has taken into his head?

Era. We are at least doing all we can for it, and we have ready many schemes to bring such an absurd notion to naught.

Ner. (running towards Julia). I say, here is your father.

Jul. Ah! let us separate quickly.

Ner. No, no; don't go; I made a mistake.

Jul. How absurd you are, Nérine, to give us such a fright!

Era. Yes, dear Julia, we have plenty of stratagems ready for the purpose; and, in accordance with the permission you have given me, we will not hesitate to make use of every means. Do not ask me what it is we are going to do; you will have the fun of seeing it, and, as at a comedy, it will be nice for you to have the pleasure of being surprised without my letting you know beforehand what is going to take place. This is telling you that we have many schemes in hand for the occasion, and that our clever Nérine and the dexterous Sbrigani have undertaken to bring the affair to a successful issue.

Ner. Yes, we have indeed. Is your father crazy to think of entangling you with his lawyer of Limoges; that Mr. de Pourceaugnac, whom he has never seen in his life, and who comes by the coach to take you away before our very eyes? Ought three or four thousand crowns, more or less – and that, too, upon the word of your uncle – to make him refuse a lover you like? Besides, are you made for a Limousin? If he has taken it into his head to marry, why does he not take one of his own countrywomen, and let Christians be at peace? The very name of Pourceaugnac puts me in a frightful rage. I boil over with Mr. de Pourceaugnac. If it were only because of the name, I would do anything to prevent the match. No, you shall not be Mrs. de Pourceaugnac. Pourceaugnac! Was ever such a name heard of!1 No, I could never put up with Pourceaugnac; and we will abuse the man to such an extent, and play him so many tricks, that he will have to return to Limoges, Mr. de Pourceaugnac.

Era. Here is our cunning Neapolitan, who will give us news.

1

Pourceaugnac equals pourceau, "a young pig," plus the local ending -gnac.

Monsieur De Pourceaugnac

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