Читать книгу A Mother For His Children - Jan Drexler - Страница 11

Chapter Two

“Martha, get in here and help me this minute!”

Waneta’s strident voice reached Ruthy, even in the back bedroom of the Dawdi Haus, and she sat up on the bed. The room was rosy and dim with the glow of the setting sun. She must have fallen asleep.

She hadn’t realized how tired she’d been after the long train ride, but her short nap had been anything but restful. Even this far away from Bird-in-Hand, Elam dominated her thoughts and intruded on her sleep. She pushed him away as Waneta’s voice carried through the house again.

“Martha!”

The poor girl sounded at her wits’ end. Ruthy bent down to slip her feet into her shoes. Levi Zook had told her to take it easy this afternoon, but it was nearly suppertime and certainly Waneta could use some help.

Ruthy repinned her kapp and went into the kitchen of the main house. Chaos reigned. The two little girls chased each other around the big table with flatware in their hands, their laughter high and shrill. Sam scraped a chair across the wooden floor to a counter where a cake waited to be frosted. Waneta struggled to pull a roasting pan from the oven, her hair falling around her face and her kapp limp and nearly falling off.

Seizing a towel from the counter, Ruthy grabbed one end of the roaster.

“Waneta, this ham smells wonderful-gut.” Together, they lifted the roaster onto the counter next to the stove and Waneta closed the oven door with a bang.

“Denki, but you’re supposed to be resting. Dat said you’d be tired from your long trip.”

“I’ve rested enough, and you look like you could use some help.”

“Ja, for sure I can, but you shouldn’t have to help with your own welcome supper.”

“Never mind that. Just let me help.”

Waneta’s brown eyes startled wide and she dashed around Ruthy. “Sam! You know better than that! Look what you’ve done to the cake!”

Ruthy turned to see Sam holding a chunk of unfrosted cake in his hand. Her smile froze on her face. If this was the way Levi Zook raised his children, he needed her more than he thought. It was time for her to start earning her money.

A vision of her elementary school teacher, Mrs. Studer, flashed into her mind. The Englisch woman had ruled a classroom full of forty-five children from first through eighth grades with a calm voice and a no-nonsense approach to rules. Ruthy had loved her. What would Mrs. Studer do with this mess if she were here?

Stepping to the table, Ruthy caught each of the eight-year-old twins by the arm as they ran past her. “What are the two of you supposed to be doing?”

Their flushed faces looked into hers, and then they both glanced at Waneta.

“We’re setting the table,” one of them said, grinning at Ruthy. When Ruthy kept her face stern, the grin vanished.

“Then you should be setting the table, shouldn’t you? Games like this should be saved for outdoors.”

The girl who had spoken nodded her head. Ruthy turned to her twin sister, ready to scold both of them, but the tears in the girl’s eyes stopped her words. She was so much more sensitive than her sister. How different could twins be?

“You will need to help me with your names for a while. I know one of you is Nellie, right?” The silent twin nodded her head and she turned back to the more daring girl. “So you’re Nancy.”

“You’re right.” The girl grinned again, her blue eyes sparkling.

“Nancy, you go ahead and finish putting the flatware on the table and Nellie can get the plates.”

Nellie went to a cupboard near the sink and opened it, revealing a generous stack of white plates. Such a tender child in this boisterous family seemed out of place. Ruthy turned her attention back to Sam, who was sitting on the chair next to the decimated cake, calmly eating the piece he had stolen. Waneta glanced at Ruthy as she opened a jar of pickled beets and gave her a quick smile. At least one person approved of the way she was handling things so far.

Ruthy knelt next to the little boy.

“Are you enjoying that cake?”

Sam nodded and grinned at her. His blue eyes were full of mischief, but his sweet smile made her long to give him a hug.

She couldn’t give in to that! This boy was a little thief who needed to be taught a lesson.

“It would taste better with frosting on it, wouldn’t it?”

“Ja,” Sam said between bites. “’Neta makes the best frosting.”

“It’s too bad you won’t get any, then.”

Sam stopped, the cake halfway to his mouth for another bite. “Why won’t I get any?”

Ruthy rose and took a spoonful of frosting from the nearby bowl. “You’re eating your cake now instead of after supper. So when the rest of us have our pieces with frosting, you won’t be able to have any.” She started frosting the untouched layer of cake and exchanged a glance with Waneta. The girl gave her a grateful smile.

“If I give it back, will you put frosting on it?” Sam held out his remaining chunk of cake.

“Will you promise to leave desserts alone until after the meals from now on?”

Sam stared at the cake, considering. Then he nodded. “I’ll try.”

“All right then.” Ruthy got a plate from the cupboard and Sam deposited his cake on it. “I’ll frost this piece just for you.” Sam slid down from the chair and headed into the front room.

“Denki,” Waneta whispered. “Dat always complains about pieces missing from the cakes, but I don’t know how to stop him.”

“I have a brother who tried the same thing when he was Sam’s age. Mam made him give up his desserts for a month when he didn’t stop.”

Waneta giggled. “You’ll have to threaten Sam with that. Nothing I say will make him behave.”

Ruthy set the broken cake layer on top of the first one and spread it with another dollop of frosting. Dessert wouldn’t be pretty, but from the way Sam liked his sister’s cake, she could tell it would still taste good.

“Do you always make the meals by yourself?”

Waneta drained a pot full of cooked potatoes. “Usually. Martha is supposed to help me, but she always disappears just when I need her.”

Ruthy tried to remember who Martha was, then placed her. The girl with her nose in a book in the Dawdi Haus earlier. Levi Zook needed more than a housekeeper—that man needed someone to take his younger girls in hand. He had been right when he said this task was too big for Waneta.

While Waneta piled slices of ham on a platter and filled the table with green beans, carrots, bread and pickles, Ruthy mashed the potatoes. Waneta sent Nancy to the back porch to ring the dinner bell, and soon the kitchen was full of children finding their places on the long benches that sat along the sides of the big table. Levi Zook came into the kitchen last, combing his fingers through his beard. Once he took his seat at the head of the table, Ruthy took the only place left, on the end opposite Levi Zook.

Every eye at the table was focused on her and she felt her face grow hot. Had she done something wrong? Were they waiting for her to do something?

“She’s sitting in Mam’s chair,” said one of the older boys.

Ruthy started to rise. She wasn’t here to take their mam’s place.

“It’s all right Nathan,” Levi said. “Ruth, that is your place at the table for now.” Levi looked at the boy who had spoken and the older brother sitting next to him. “Your mam is gone. We will not make her place at the table a shrine.”

Both boys lowered their eyes, their necks red. Ach, ja, they missed their mam. It would take some time for them to get used to Ruthy being here.

Levi cleared his throat. “Let’s pray.”

Ruthy bowed her head and silently began reciting her mealtime prayer in her head. Before she was done she heard the distinct clink of Levi’s fork against his plate. Was that his signal the prayer was over? She raised her eyes to see him staring at her, an unreadable expression on his face.

How did he feel about her sitting in his dead wife’s chair? However he felt, Levi Zook needed her.

* * *

As soon as Levi had come into the kitchen for supper he could feel the change. The bustling kitchen, normally noisy and chaotic, had an undergirding of order Levi hadn’t seen since before Sam was born.

And now the reason for that difference was sitting at the opposite end of the long table from him. Ruth sat at the foot of his table as if she had always done so, accepting the dishes of food passed to her and helping Sam cut the meat on his plate. She smiled at each of the children as she spoke to them, introducing herself to Nathan and Elias, who had been outside since she arrived, and asking about each of the children’s favorite foods.

The sound of her voice was a balm that soothed a festering need. When Salome died a year ago, a light had gone out in his home, but now the small flame of a woman’s influence was sputtering to life again.

Levi speared a chunk of ham and swirled it in his mashed potatoes before bringing it to his mouth with a satisfied sigh. He had done a good thing when he put that notice in The Budget, no matter what his sister, Eliza, said. His children needed a woman’s touch, that’s all, and they belonged at home. Farming them out to relatives wouldn’t be good for them at all.

He took another bite of ham and potatoes, and then reached for his glass of milk. Eleven pairs of eyes followed every movement, and he became aware that silence had descended on the table. He glanced at Ruth, and found her staring at him.

Levi finished chewing, and then took a swallow from his glass. His children looked expectant, except Sam, who looked down at his plate when Levi’s gaze reached the far end of the table. Ruth’s expression hadn’t changed.

“Did you hear me, Levi Zook?”

Her hair glowed like gold in the light from the kerosene lamp above the table. Had she said something to him?

“Ne, Ruth, I didn’t hear you.”

“I said Sam seems to be at loose ends here in the house all day. I asked when you will take him out to do barn chores with you.”

His face grew hot as Ruth kept her gaze on him. She hadn’t been here more than a few hours, and already she was telling him how to raise his son?

Ja, well, she was right, it was time for Sam to join him in the barn. It was another thing he had neglected in the last year. Shame threatened, but irritation quickly squelched it. He should have taken this action sooner, but no woman was going to dictate how he raised his children.

“Sam will join me in the barn when I’m ready for him to, and not a moment sooner.”

Ruth’s face reddened as her eyes narrowed. She opened her mouth to speak, but Sam’s voice piped up. “I’m ready now, Dat. Jesse has been helping you since he was little, and I’m almost as big as him.”

Levi glanced at Jesse. At seven years old, he still wasn’t much bigger than his little brother. He hunched his shoulders around his slight frame as if he wanted to slink away from the table. He hated being the center of attention.

Jesse had been helping in the barn for a couple of years already, but he still needed a lot of help and training with his chores, which took time. With Sam there, it would take even more time away from his own work, but on the other hand, the two smaller boys could help each other.

She was right.

But he would take himself behind the woodshed for a thrashing before he gave in to this woman now. This was his family and he would have the final say in how his children were raised.

He stood up, his chair scraping against the wooden floor. “I’m going out to finish the chores.”

He grabbed his hat from the hook by the back door and stormed through the porch, snagging his coat from the wall as he went.

The meal had started out so well, before she interfered. Levi stopped beside the chicken coop, taking a deep breath of the frigid January air. Before she made a simple suggestion.

He reached into the pockets of his coat for his gloves and pulled them on, turning to face the house. Light from the kitchen windows gave a warm glow to the snow of the barnyard, pulling his gaze back to the table he had just left. He could see the shadowy forms of his children through the white curtains and their voices drifted to him in the still night. Elias’s deep bass chuckle rumbled through the higher pitches of the other children’s laughter.

Pride had forced him out here into the dark, but he was right, wasn’t he? He was the man in this house, not some upstart woman who comes in and tries to take over.

A woman he had invited. A woman he was paying to run his house for him.

What bothered him most was that she was right. It was past time for him to bring Sam along as he worked. Next year his youngest son would start school, and he would have missed his opportunity to start him out right.

Cold forced him away from the golden glow of the kitchen window and into the cowshed. He lit the lantern and checked on Moolah, the tall, bony Holstein. She was his best milker and due to drop a calf in a few weeks. She blinked an eye at him and chewed her cud. She was nice and comfortable tonight.

Levi went through the cowshed and into the main barn. The constant rustling in the vast haymow above him was interrupted by a thump and a squeak as one of the barn cats ended a successful hunt. A moment of silence, and then the rustling started again as the mice resumed their endless quest for food. He opened the door of the workshop and hung the lantern on its hook. He had been sharpening knives before the supper bell rang, and he might as well finish the job now.

He picked up one of the kitchen knives and tested its blade with his thumb. Taking the whetstone, he started the circular motion that would bring back the fine, sharp edge. From the workbench he could see the kitchen window. Movement behind the curtains told him the girls were clearing the table. Before long the children would bring out the projects they were working on during their Christmas vacation from school. This was the time of the evening when he enjoyed sitting close by, reading The Budget or a farm magazine, ready to answer any questions they had.

In the days before he lost Salome, she would sit in the rocking chair he had placed in the kitchen for her, knitting or mending, and enjoying their family. He could see her now, if he closed his eyes to the tools and workbench surrounding him. His Salome, rocking softly in her chair, and the gentle smile she kept on her face in spite of the pain.

The pain that had been her constant burden during those last months. Pain so horrible, that when she died, he had wept as much from thankfulness that she had been released, as from grief that he had lost her.

Levi pulled his mind away from the memories. Salome was free of pain now, safe and secure in the Blessed Land.

The knife lay loose in his hand, forgotten. He turned the blade over, working the other side.

He had taken her presence for granted, he knew that. From the time he first met her when they were children, he had thought Salome would always be with him. His partner in life, and together in their old age. But it wasn’t to be. God saw fit to let him carry on alone.

And alone he would stay, it seemed. He had exhausted the eligible women in the district and beyond, and not one of them would agree to be his wife. He had settled for the next best thing—a housekeeper.

And God provided Ruth. He had expected an older woman, but Ruth seemed capable and she was already making friends with the children. And at least now his family was safe from his interfering sister.

* * *

As the door slammed behind Levi Zook, Ruthy’s stomach turned. Ach, she had spoken before thinking again! As the father, he was the only one who had the say in how Sam was raised, not her. He certainly wouldn’t want her meddling, especially her first day here.

The children’s laughter broke into her thoughts as Elias told a joke and Ruthy smiled along with them. Surely they would have noticed their daed’s mood when he left the house? But it didn’t seem like they thought anything unusual had happened. Perhaps Levi acted like this quite often.

She bit her lip at the sudden thought that perhaps his mood had nothing to do with her. He had recently lost his wife, and he was probably still in mourning for her.

That must be the problem. She must be more understanding of the poor man.

After supper and dishes were done, the children brought books, sewing projects and knitting needles and gathered back at the table under the bright light.

“What do you have planned for tomorrow?” Ruthy gave the dishrag a final rinse as Waneta set the last plates in the cupboard.

“Whatever has to be done.” Waneta leaned against the counter with a sigh. “There’s always work waiting, isn’t there?”

“Do you follow a schedule?”

“Mam did, but I don’t know how she did it. I try to do laundry on Monday, the way she did, but then everyone runs out of clothes after only a few days, and I have to do laundry again. Then there aren’t enough dirty clothes to wash on the next Monday....” Waneta’s words faltered and she sent a pleading look at Ruthy.

“It sounds like all you need is some organization.” Ruthy silently thanked her mother for teaching her to run an orderly home. She would certainly need all those skills now. “Let’s sit down and make a list of what needs to be done.”

As she and Waneta planned their week, Ruthy worked to keep her rising impatience out of her voice. Levi Zook’s wife had only been gone a year, but from what Waneta told her, she had been bearing the heaviest load of the housekeeping for several years. Her father had expected entirely too much from this young girl.

When Levi and Elias came into the back porch just as the clock was striking eight o’clock, stomping the snow off their boots on the wood floor, Ruthy rose to make her way to the Dawdi Haus.

“We’ll start on the mending tomorrow, right after we redd up the house in the morning.”

Waneta gave her a grateful smile. “That sounds wonderful-gut. It’s so much better to have everything planned out, isn’t it?”

“We’ll tackle things one day at a time for now, and then on Monday we’ll put together a schedule for the week.” Ruthy patted the girl’s arm. “And don’t be in any hurry to get up in the morning. I’ll get breakfast started, and you can come down to help when the others do.”

Waneta’s smile broke into a big grin at that, and Ruthy slipped through the door into the passageway just as the door from the porch burst open. She had intruded on this family enough for one day.

Closing the door of her Dawdi Haus, Ruthy lit the lamp on the table in her front room. After building up the fire in the small stove, she hunted out the yarn and knitting needles she had brought with her. Keeping this family in stockings would keep her needles busy every evening.

The rocking chair creaked in the quiet room as she cast on the stitches she needed to make the first of a pair of men’s stockings. Her mind drifted back to Lancaster County, to the home she had left behind. Mam would be knitting tonight, while Daed read aloud from The Budget. The thought brought tears to her eyes and she laid her needles down. Why had God called her to leave her home and come here? Soon Daed and Mam would be saying their evening prayer before they went up to bed, and she wouldn’t be in the family circle.

She brushed away the tears and resumed working on the stocking. As she rocked and knitted, she recited the prayer she had heard every night of her life, hearing Daed’s voice in her memory.

When she finished, Ruthy let the stocking drop in her lap again and gazed at the empty room around her. Of all the things she had considered about choosing to follow God’s call to be a maidle and to serve Him by working in strangers’ homes, she had never considered this solitude. The clock ticking on the wall struck the half hour, the single chime echoing in the silent room. Years of empty, silent evenings stretched before her.

Without a family of her own, she would always be only that single note.

* * *

“She isn’t Mam,” Nellie said as she snuggled next to Levi on the sofa.

“Ne, she isn’t Mam.” Levi held his daughter tightly as he kissed the top of her head.

“I like her,” Waneta said. “She was a big help with supper and afterwards.”

Levi took in the faces of the other children as they gathered in the front room for their usual before-bedtime talk. When Salome was alive, this had been the time when he had led his family in evening prayers, but he hadn’t had the heart to resume them since she had left him with their children to raise alone.

“What do you think, Elias?” Levi turned to his oldest son, only sixteen and already finding ways to spend time away from the family. He was serious about some girl and spent every Saturday evening out with his courting buggy.

Elias rubbed the back of his neck, his chin rough with young whiskers. “She’s all right. She’s just keeping house, right? You haven’t brought her here to marry her or anything, have you?”

“Ne. I only hired her to be our housekeeper and help with the girls.”

“Well, then,” said Nathan, “she can stay. Anything so we don’t have to eat Waneta’s cooking anymore.” He grinned and ducked away as Waneta aimed a playful slap at his head.

“She can’t stay. She’s mean.” Sam shifted on Levi’s lap, where Levi thought he had been sleeping.

“You only think she’s mean because she wouldn’t let you eat cake before supper.” Nancy was snuggled against one side of him the way her twin, Nellie, was snuggled against the other.

“You shouldn’t eat cake before supper anyway.” Martha was lying on the floor, staring at the ceiling, always the dreamer.

Levi stood up, lifting Sam in his arms. “Come now, it’s time for bed.”

James and David finished their game of checkers while the others filed up the stairway. Jesse didn’t move from the corner of the sofa, where his head leaned against the padded arm as he snored softly. Levi smiled. He’d carry Sam up to the bed the two little ones shared and then come back down for Jesse. At least both boys were still small enough for him to carry.

After tucking the two boys into their bed and saying good-night to each of the others, Levi steeled himself for the late-night visit to check the barn. Braving the bitter cold one more time was necessary if he was going to be able to rest peacefully tonight.

He crossed the big front room to the kitchen door in his stocking feet, following a path of light across the dark floor. Someone had left the lamp burning in the kitchen. It was a waste of good lamp oil when he was scraping for cash to pay his new housekeeper.

At the doorway, he stopped. She was in the kitchen, her back to him, wearing a white flannel nightgown. The lamp from the Dawdi Haus burned on the counter next to her, its gentle flicker mingling with the sound of her voice humming a tune in the quiet room. Her golden hair trailed down her back in a thick braid as she worked with the dough trough, setting the sponge for tomorrow’s bread.

Levi’s mouth went dry as he stared at the lustrous rope. Salome’s hair had been beautiful, brown and fine, falling down her back like silky water when she brushed it out, but that had been before her illness caused her hair to become dry and brittle. It had been a long time—too long—since he had run his hands through a woman’s hair.

Lamplight glowed around Ruth’s white gown with an ethereal light. When she reached up into the cupboard, that golden braid swung across her back, pulling a moan from him that he strangled with a cough. At the noise she turned around.

“Levi Zook! I thought you had all gone to bed.” She backed away, even though the entire kitchen stretched between them. “I forgot to set the sponge for tomorrow’s bread....” Then her eyes narrowed as she focused on his feet. “Why are you walking around in just your stockings?”

She sounded like his mother. “I’m going out to check the barn before I go to bed like I always do. Don’t worry, I’ll put my boots on before I go outdoors.”

Ruth put one hand on her hip and pointed a wooden spoon at his feet with the other. “You’ll put holes in your stockings if you don’t wear something over them.”

Levi gritted his teeth, but he fought to keep his words even. “I won’t wear my boots in the house.”

“Don’t you have slippers?” She cocked her head to one side, facing him down the way he did his Percheron gelding.

“Ne, I don’t. But at least I’m not walking around barefoot on a freezing night.”

Her face blanched as she looked down at her bare toes below the hem of her nightgown. She reached her hand up to where her kapp should be and blood rushed to her cheeks. “Ach, I forgot... You must think... I’m so sorry...” She dropped the spoon on the counter and fled through the door to the Dawdi Haus.

Levi stared at the door she slammed behind her, his mind filled with the image of her flowing white gown and that trailing braid. Taking a deep breath, he rubbed his hands over his eyes then smoothed his beard. This wasn’t what he had bargained for when he set out to hire a housekeeper.