Читать книгу The Doctor's Meant-To-Be Marriage - Janice Lynn - Страница 10

WHAT had he agreed to?

Nothing. He hadn’t agreed, and no way was he going to dinner with Chelsea. Not even with his partners there as buffers. He’d been right to avoid her and should stick with that plan as much as current circumstances allowed.

But for the rest of the day Jared’s mind kept drifting back to how his skin had tingled when they’d touched, how her smile gave glimpses of lightheartedness, how his body perked up at her nearness.

But he shouldn’t do anything to encourage thoughts that there could ever be anything between them. There couldn’t. Attraction between him and Chelsea was the last thing he needed. His life in Madison was good, exactly what he wanted. It had taken him a long time to find happiness after Laura’s death and he wouldn’t risk losing that hard-won inner peace.

Not peace, really, he had too much guilt for that, would always have too much guilt over what had happened to Laura, but he’d come to terms of a sort with what had happened.

He’d done the right thing, focused on his relationship with Laura when she’d told him she was pregnant the week after she’d returned from Greece. The week after he’d met Chelsea.

Laura had known something had changed, that he hadn’t been the same after spring break. She’d pushed, she’d prodded, she’d begged him to tell her if he wanted her to have an abortion. He hadn’t, but neither had he been able to admit that he’d fallen for a seventeen-year-old girl. He’d pushed thoughts of Chelsea aside, had asked Laura to marry him, and had committed himself to being a good husband and father.

She’d been ecstatic, until she’d overheard a conversation not meant for her ears. A conversation when his buddies Larry and Tom had ragged him about Chelsea and the way she hero-worshipped him. Jared had snapped, telling them to shut up, but it had been too late. Laura had seen the truth on his face, and they’d argued.

Although not in the way she’d wanted, he had loved Laura and would have done everything in his power to make her happy, would have been a good husband and father.

He’d never gotten the opportunity.

That night, she’d swerved off the rode, hit a tree, and lost their baby and her life.

Guilt had held him captive ever since.

Guilt that said he didn’t deserve happiness, particularly not with Chelsea.

“Dr Jared?” interrupted his nurse, Kayla Welker. He’d hired Kayla the month he’d started at the clinic and he’d never had cause to regret his decision.

He blinked, clearing the past from his mind. For the moment, at least. “Yes?”

“Sorry to bother you, but I just put Anthony Rogle in room two. He’s wheezing. Do you want me to give him a breathing treatment, or would you like to check him first?”

“I’ll see Tony first. Go ahead and set up the nebulizer, though. No doubt, he’ll need it.” Jared followed Kayla to the exam room where the pale twenty-one-year-old struggled to catch his breath, wheezing audibly. A beautiful girl sat next to him, holding his hand and whispering assurances.

“Thank goodness, Dr Jared.” The young woman sighed her relief. “Tony is having another attack.”

“Hey, Emily.” Jared motioned for Kayla to start the machine as soon as she got the apparatus set up. He listened to Tony’s heaving chest. “Any triggering factors this time?”

Emily shook her head. “We were at work, and his chest started heaving. He used his inhaler, but his breathing didn’t get better so I drove him here. Doc, why has he started having these attacks? They scare the devil out of me!”

“Quit…talking…about me…like I’m not here,” the thin, pale young man ordered, giving his girlfriend an irritated look as he panted for air.

Kayla handed Tony the breathing apparatus, and he began inhaling the albuterol solution via the nebulizer. The noise of the machine droned through the otherwise silent room. When Tony gave the thumbs-up sign that his wheezing was starting to ease, Jared turned to Emily and Kayla.

“Keep an eye on him. I’ll be back in a few minutes.”

Two months ago Tony had suffered his first asthma attack. He’d had no prior history of problems. His episodes occurred mostly at work, but he’d had a few at home and one at his girlfriend’s family home.

His hand-held inhalers helped on occasion, but more and more Tony’s attacks weren’t eased without a trip into the office or the emergency room. More often than not, getting his attack under control required a steroid injection along with the nebulizer treatment. Jared tried to avoid the steroid shot if possible because of the potential side effects. Hopefully as Tony could already feel some relief, using the nebulizer, no injection would be needed today.

What was causing the young man’s attacks?

Developing asthma at twenty-one wasn’t a common phenomenon. They’d gone through Tony’s risk factors, and although he worked in the paint shop of a boat factory he always wore proper ventilation masks. There had been no new products or changes in the home and he didn’t have a pet. There were no recent illnesses and once the attack passed, Tony felt fine except for being tired, a frequent symptom following an asthma attack.

Jared saw his next patient, a schoolteacher needing a refill on her anxiety medication. When he’d finished, he knocked on Tony’s door. The nebulizer no longer hummed, meaning the treatment had finished.

“How’s the breathing?”

“Much better, Doc,” Tony answered, talking without sounding winded. Emily still sat, squeezing his hand and watching him nervously, like she expected his chest to heave again any moment. All that Jared had expected to see. What he hadn’t expected to see was Chelsea smiling at his patients, chatting with them while she packed up the nebulizer. What was she doing and where was Kayla?

Chelsea’s golden brown gaze met his and for a moment he felt as if she searched his soul, seeking answers to questions he couldn’t acknowledge. But then she slid on a professional façade, picked up the machine, and gave a tight smile.

“Kayla had some business to take care of, and I was between patients,” she said by way of explanation. Without glancing his way again, she pushed past him in the small room. Her shoulder brushed against his, making his nerve endings pulse to life. Her scent filled his nostrils, making him feel as if he was struggling for his next breath every bit as much as Tony had prior to his treatment.

When she closed the door behind her, he sucked in air, hoping to ease his oxygen-deprived brain cells, or whatever was making him feel so dizzy.

He turned to Tony and Emily. “What happened?”

“I was on break and all of a sudden I couldn’t catch my breath. I felt like an elephant was sitting on my chest.” Tony placed his hand over his sternum. “Like I needed to rip my rib cage open so air could get into my lungs.”

How he’d just felt with Chelsea near.

He winced at the thought and focused on his patient. “You used your inhaler?”

Tony nodded. “I even took more puffs than I’m supposed to, but I just couldn’t catch my breath. I should probably take my nebulizer with me to work.”

“Are you using your nebulizer often?”

“I’ve used it some,” the young man admitted. “But since you started me on that asthma tablet I’ve only had to use the machine twice.”

“You’re using the inhaled steroid, too?”

“Just like you told me.”

“You haven’t thought of anything that’s changed within the past two months?”

“Same house, same car, same job, same girlfriend.” Tony shot Emily a teasing glance. “I could replace her and see if she’s the problem.”

She slapped his arm. “Then you really wouldn’t be able to breathe because I’d strangle you.”

The tender kiss she placed on his cheek and the worried way she watched each breath he took told another story.

Tony winked. “See what kind of abuse I have to put up with, Doc?”

“I see.” Jared smiled at the couple, wondering if he’d ever been that young. He had, of course. He’d foolishly thought he’d been in love and had destroyed much of his life. Destroyed Laura’s life. “I’m going to keep you here a while longer just to make sure you’re over the attack. I’ll have Kayla check on you in a few and if things are OK, we’ll let you go home. I’m going to go ahead and set you up to see a pulmonologist, though. That’s a lung specialist. Maybe he can figure out what’s causing these attacks.”

Jared planned to do more research that night to see if he could unravel any clues about why Tony had suddenly started having his attacks.

Although, recalling his dinner plans, his research might be later than he intended.

Darn Will and Leslie for putting him on the spot like that. There’d been no way for him to continue to refuse without raising their suspicions. He didn’t want to deal with questions about why he didn’t want to go, why he didn’t want to be around Chelsea.

He’d call and cancel because being near Chelsea definitely caused him breathing problems.

Chelsea brushed her hand over the clean lines of her cherry-wood desk. She glanced approvingly at the gleaming surface, smiling at how her first day had gone.

Other than Hannah Belew, all the patients had seemed to accept her and be pleased with their care. Chelsea was holding out hope that Hannah would schedule her pelvic examination and vaccination. Maybe the girl would decide to go to the local health department. Or decide not to have sex anymore.

And Jared, well, she just didn’t know what to think about his odd reaction. She’d always wondered what he’d say, what he’d do when their paths crossed again. She hadn’t expected the coldness. Not really. Maybe a few awkward moments until he realized she wasn’t going to launch herself at him, but then he’d laugh and treat her with the same fondness he had that spring.

Only Jared was different in that regard. He looked like he rarely laughed these days. Had Laura’s death robbed him of that inner joy Chelsea had found so charismatic?

“What are you looking so contrite about?” Will asked, poking his head into her office.

“Come in,” she said, motioning for him to have a seat. “I was just reflecting on the day.”

“And?”

She smiled. “Overall, things went well.”

“Overall?”

Her smile faded. She really needed to be careful about what she said to her brother. She didn’t want to give him cause for worry where Jared was concerned. Not when there would never be anything between them anyway. “I had a patient leave before I finished.”

He looked taken aback. “Someone left in the middle of your examination?”

“No,” she clarified, shaking her head. “I stepped out to give a young girl a moment to think about getting a pelvic examination. When I came back to the room, she’d disappeared.”

Will’s confusion melted away to mild amusement. “I don’t blame her. I’d run too if you tried to put me in stirrups.”

Chelsea tossed her ink-pen cap at him. “You’re not helping.”

Grinning, he caught the plastic cap. “Apparently she wasn’t ready for a pelvic. What’s the problem?”

“She’s sexually active. She came in to get a prescription for birth control. What if she ends up pregnant because she ran out instead of finishing her exam?”

“Then her pregnancy would be her fault. Not yours.”

“But I should have—”

Will put up his hand. “Did you explain the reasons why she needed a pelvic exam?”

“Yes, but—”

“No buts. I’m sure you did a great job. The rest is up to the patient. You can’t force people to make the right decisions for their health, Chels.”

Talking to her brother could be like talking to a brick wall. Particularly as he was brilliant and usually made great sense.

“I know, but—”

“I already told you, no buts.” Smirking, he winked. “Although I understand why you keep bringing mine up since it’s so dashing.”

“Your butt is dashing?” She gave a sisterly eye roll. “I swear I’d think you were insane if I didn’t know how intelligent you really are.”

“Thanks, sis.” He leaned back, glanced around the office. His gaze lingered on the items she’d unpacked from her box, which included several photos of the two of them and friends. When his gaze returned to hers, his seriousness surprised her. “Was today everything you thought your first day would be?”

Not sure what had caused his mood to change, she nodded. “It was much more.”

Because she’d seen Jared, touched Jared, refreshed her memory of just how powerfully he affected her mind and body. No, that was crazy. Jared was not why she was in Madison.

Will’s brow lifted. “More?”

“Today wasn’t much different than any other day for the past couple of years.” After all, she’d been seeing patients for quite some time during her residency. “Yet because I was at a real job, with my own office and name tag…” she touched the gift he’d given her that morning “…today was magical.”

Apparently pleased with her answer, Will nodded. “Good. You deserve magical. You ready to go out to celebrate?”

Chelsea glanced down at her spic-and-span desk. “I suppose. Is Jared going?”

She could have kicked herself for the slipup. No way should she be asking her brother about Jared. She’d always been subtle when she’d asked about him in the past, but there’d been nothing subtle about her blunt, heartfelt question just then.

“Said he was. Why?”

Under the intensity of her brother’s stare, she fought the urge to blush. Something told her Will wouldn’t be happy if she said that at seventeen she’d taken one look at Jared and had fallen for him hook, line, and sinker and today she’d discovered those feelings for him to be just as strong.

No matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t keep her gaze locked on her brother’s. “No reason other than I wondered who was going.”

Her brother wasn’t buying any of it. She didn’t have to be looking into his eyes to know that.

“Sis.” Will sounded resigned. “This isn’t a good idea.”

“What isn’t a good idea?” She arched a brow and stared straight into his eyes.

“Jared.”

“What about Jared?”

“I don’t want you getting any ideas about him. He’s not right for you.” If it had been anyone other than Will talking she’d think they meant she wasn’t good enough, but it was her brother. Will never thought any man was good enough for her. Certainly, he’d never liked Kevin.

“No worries, then, because my only interest in Jared is business.” She hated lying, but she didn’t want interference when there wasn’t anything between her and Jared except memories of a passionate kiss and a brief heated look that morning that had quickly transformed into icicles.

“Just you make sure to keep it that way.” Will’s gaze flickered, causing suspicion to flare.

“Tell me something, Will. Why is it that I’ve not once seen Jared in the past ten years? Not even when I was interviewed for this job?”

“He was out of the country, doing mission work.”

“I know he was on a mission trip and Jennifer wants to take off to go stay with her mother following her hip-replacement surgery, but don’t you think it’s a little odd that I’ve not seen Jared since that spring we all came down here?”

Will crossed his arms and took on a stubborn look. “Not really, although I hadn’t really thought about it. Is there any particular reason why you would have wanted to see him?”

Knowing she was revealing too much by questioning her brother, she shook her head. “No reason.”

She got ready to leave for their dinner, but Will lingered.

“Look, sis, you should know that Jared…” He glanced around the room as if he’d find whatever word he searched for. “Well, he’s got a bit of a reputation.”

Ah, here came another brotherly warning. She’d known she’d said too much. “A reputation?”

“As a ladies’ man.”

She could remind her brother about his own reputation, but opted to hold her tongue, especially as she hadn’t seen much to warrant that reputation since she’d moved to Madison. “And?”

“You shouldn’t get any thoughts about him.”

“Thoughts?” She blinked innocently, although she knew exactly what he meant.

“Non-professional ones, because in the long run you’d end up getting hurt. He’s never gotten over Laura.”

Chelsea sighed with great exaggeration. “This is unnecessary, Will. I’m going to dinner with all the providers I work with, including you. Not on a date with Jared.”

“Yes, but you’re a beautiful woman and he’s…” An irritated look came over his face.

“He’s what?” she prompted, trying not to let her brother’s offhand compliment sidetrack her from the real issue.

“Not blind,” he ground out.

“Are you saying you think Jared might find me attractive?”

God, she hoped so. How pathetic was that when, even if he did, a relationship between them would never work?

“Not if he wants to live.” Will smacked his fist into the palm of his other hand with emphasis.

Enough of the theatrics. She couldn’t have her brother going all macho on his best friend. “Will,” she said softly, “there’s nothing for you to be concerned about.”

“I’ll be concerned when you’re eighty when someone as jaded as Jared is involved.”

She met her brother’s stern expression and resisted the urge to hug him for loving her so much.

Will raked his fingers through his dark hair. “Don’t get me wrong. He’s my friend, a brilliant doctor, and we’re lucky to have him, but he goes through women like a proctologist goes through rubber gloves.”

“Eww.” Chelsea scowled at her brother’s analogy. “Bad comparison.”

“But true.” His jaw tightened. “Jared has only had one use for women since Laura died. I saw how you looked at him this morning, and I don’t want to see you hurt, Chels.”

He’d seen that look? No wonder he was issuing warnings.

“Will…” She sought the right words to tell her brother how much she loved and appreciated him, but wanted him to butt out when it came to her love life. Or lack of one, in this instance. “I’m twenty-eight years old and can decide for myself whether or not someone is worth the risk of getting hurt. Believe it or not, I’m not totally inexperienced,” she said.

“Give me a name.” Will’s teeth gritted, his fists clenched at his sides, and she believed he really would go and fight for her honor.

Chelsea laughed. She couldn’t help herself. Will’s outrage was so adorable. “You can’t go around bloodying every guy who finds me attractive.”

“Wanna bet?”

She snickered in a very unlady-like way. “Lighten up. I’d like to marry and have kids someday.”

Jared’s babies. She closed her eyes and pictured blue-eyed, black-haired imps who called her mommy. Oh, what a fantasy.

“Just so long as you don’t actually want Jared.”

Had he read her mind?

“Even discounting the little-sister factor,” he continued, “which is huge by the way, think how difficult a crash and burn between the two of you would make things at the office.”

A nervous flutter gurgled in her belly, but she refused to acknowledge the warning. She gave him a smile meant to be light, but her attempt came out as forced. “I guess it’s a good thing we’re only going out for dinner as a group of coworkers, then.”

“You’re making fun of this, but I’m serious, Chels. Jared is a good guy, but Laura’s death messed up his head. He’s not been close to anyone since.”

After ten years of carrying Jared in her heart and knowing she’d never have him, Will’s warning fell flat.

Picking up her purse, she gave her brother a bright smile. “I’m going to dinner with my new coworkers. No big deal. Coming?”

After all, there was no reason for Will to get so worked up when, other than that brief moment this morning, Jared had looked as if he’d rather have his nails ripped off than have to spend five minutes in her company.

The recall of the cold look he’d given her earlier sent shivers racing down her spine. What had happened to cause his expression to go from burning hot to freezing cold?

Then she knew.

Will must have seen Jared’s look, too, felt the sparks, and done what he’d just attempted to do with her.

Only Jared would have seen Will’s warning as a sign that Chelsea was still interested in him, that she still wanted him.

He probably really was afraid she was going to corner him and jump his bones. Great.

No wonder he’d gone from hot to cold.