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“Have the courage to face a difficulty, lest it kick you harder than you bargain for.”

KING STANISLAUS OF POLAND

When we get to the point where we fully acknowledge our illness, including its devastating potential, we may think (or wish) that the problems we had before we became sick will fade away. The reality is that preexisting problems may require even more of our attention, especially in the area of personal relationships.

For example, if we had constant monetary disagreements with our spouse or partner, the financial strain of illness is likely to increase the burden. Similarly, if we had difficulties communicating, we will probably face even greater communication challenges. The reason is that illness brings up unfamiliar and often frightening feelings for both partners—feelings that need to be expressed and handled.

We may want to take the attitude “I’m too sick to deal with any of this.” But we know as adults that we can’t abdicate our responsibilities, so we must ignore the temptation to do so. We continue trying to strengthen our relationships, as an integral and valuable part of the healing process.

THOUGHT FOR TODAY

Now, more than ever, we need to work things out in order to be loving and close.