Читать книгу Living Long, Living Passionately - Karen Casey - Страница 19

I've mentioned in other essays how important A Course in Miracles has been to my spiritual development. Because the course complements the twelve steps of AA and Al-Anon, I feel many moments of actual joy nearly every day, a payoff I had never expected. These three pathways have grounded me. For sure, had I not found both 12-step programs a number of decades ago, prior to my introduction to the course, I wouldn't be alive to explore the ideas I'm tossing your way here. I was headed down a very dark alley, completely unaware of how dire my circumstances were, absolutely ignorant of the danger of my chosen journey then, and without a doubt, hellbent on being my own worst enemy.

Perhaps some of you can relate. A book such as this probably wouldn't have drawn you in if you had never traveled the rocky roads of life. But then, who doesn't end up on a rocky road, at least occasionally? Rocky roads give rise to our lessons. And the lessons are why we live. It's a cycle, though not a vicious one. It just is what it is.

The title of this essay is “I can choose peace instead of this . . .” You might be wondering what that means. Here's my take: no one is in charge of my thoughts but me. No one! No one is in charge of my actions either. I can and will “show up” however I choose, every instant, within every encounter, whether with a friend, a colleague, a family member, or a stranger. Knowing that we have the power, the total power to decide who we will be every instant, makes choosing to be peaceful, rather than controlled by the ugliness of others, a delicious choice. Our choice serves as a great role model for others too. Without suggesting to anyone that they should also choose peace, they see our reward for themselves. Actions can speak far louder than words.

When I choose to sit on the sidelines, watching a drama rather than trying to manage it, particularly one that doesn't concern me, my heart isn't elevated. My mind doesn't race. I don't feel nervous, or breathless, or emotional. I experience a sense of warm, loving detachment and know immediately that I want more of that feeling. And now I know where to get it. I can and will feel peace, instead of whatever might have nabbed my emotions, when I stay in charge of what I want to feel, say, and do. This peace is available to you as well.

Enough about my feelings, my choices, and my development. It's time to explore who you are, what you feel, how you choose what you will do or say or think or feel in the myriad circumstances that fly in your direction. Let's pause before beginning the next step.

Is there anything we have talked about here that you'd like to share with a spouse or a friend? I hope so. Let's move forward together. All of us. But before doing so, write a note to a loved one about what you have learned from this particular essay. In this way, you will improve your own chances of repeating the choice in the future and you will have added benefit to your friend's life and to the lives of everyone on this planet. What we do to one, we do to all. It's called the butterfly effect. We will talk more about this in later essays.

Additionally, enriching this latter stage of life in any way we can for ourselves and others is a gift beyond measure. I promise you this.

What do you do when you take a time out from the activities that call to you? Do you meditate? If yes, do so now. If not, just close your eyes and seek to become aware of your breathing for the next few minutes.

1. What's the most recent time you felt agitation? Can you honestly assess whether you were sticking your nose into something that didn't concern you? If yes, let's revisit this scenario in your mind and choose another response to the situation. Write about this experience, the before and after of making a new choice. Focus on how a different choice made you feel.

2. Can you come up with three times in the last week that “choosing peace instead of this . . .” might have been valuable? Write about them here. It's to make an indelible impression on you that I'm suggesting this.

3. Even though taking another person's inventory isn't our business, it's helpful to take note of when others have overstepped their bounds too. Can you think of a few instances? Share those here, not as a way to judge yourself superior, but so you can get better at recognizing your own and others' interference in matters not their/your own.

4. What do you appreciate the most about choosing peace over any other kind of response, now that you have had some time to consider this? Do you imagine you will make peace a more conscious choice in the future?

5. How are you feeling right now?