Читать книгу A Family for Christmas - Kate Welsh - Страница 8

“There’s a Mr. Edward Hanson to see you, Mrs. Osborne. He says it’s urgent that he speak to you.”

Maggie stared at her secretary. What could Trent’s lawyer have to say that would be urgent? Hope flared to life in her heart. Could this be the Lord’s answer to prayer? she wondered. Had Trent rethought the idea of divorce as she’d begged him to do?

The flame of hope flickered and dimmed a bit. Were that the case, Trent would have come himself. Just last week hadn’t he said he wouldn’t change his mind? He’d even asked her not to contact him again. He’d reminded her that he was dating. He was marvelously happy with his life the way it was. The past was past, he’d said. His future lay ahead.

Without her.

And losing him was all her fault.

“Show him in, Connie.” She forced a smile, her heartache too personal to share with a co-worker.

“Oh…okay,” Connie said, clearly surprised at the break in policy.

Having cut her hours, Maggie’s appointments were carefully scheduled now. Forty to forty-five hours a week. That was all she’d ever give to a career again.

Maggie watched Connie’s wide retreating back for a few short seconds, then she closed her eyes. Please Lord. Let this be good news. Bless my marriage. Bring Trent back to me.

Maggie stood to greet Ed Hanson. His sandy hair was in its usual disarray, his jacket wrinkled as always. He was a man she’d once considered a friend, though he’d been Trent’s friend since childhood. And like most of their friends, he had chosen sides in the divorce—Trent’s side.

“Ed, good to see you. Won’t you have a seat? Can Connie get you something? A cup of coffee? Iced tea or a soft dri—” Maggie’s breath hitched in her throat when she saw the desolate expression in Ed’s pale blue eyes. Her hand came up to cover her heart. “What’s wrong? Is it Trent? Has something happened to him?”

Ed shook his head. “It’s Sarah and Michael. And the kids. They were on vacation.”

“Yes, I know. Sarah and Michael have remained friends. We attend the same church now. In fact, they—” She stopped. She was babbling. Her heart clenched with fear. “What’s happened?”

This time Ed’s eyes clouded with tears that he blinked back. Maggie instinctively sank into her chair as Ed began his explanation. “They apparently almost made it to their destination. Two more exits and they’d have been fine. But they didn’t make it. Their van was hit by an eighteen-wheeler. The police say the driver fell asleep at the wheel.”

“How badly are they hurt?” Maggie demanded, on her feet once again.

“Sit down, Maggie,” Ed said, his tone sad and frighteningly kind.

“Why?” Her voice shook. “Why must I sit down?”

“Because it isn’t good. Not good at all.” Ed took a slow deep breath. “There’s no easy way to say this. Sarah was killed instantly. Michael only lasted an hour.”

“Lord, give me strength,” Maggie prayed, and once again her fledgling faith did give her the strength she needed. She found she could breathe after all, and her heart settled back into her chest as she settled back into her chair. The children. She needed to think of the children and the loss they had suffered. “The children!”

“Calm down. The kids are all alive. Michael even managed to stay conscious long enough to give permission to the hospital to treat them, so there’s no worry there. Mickey has a spinal injury. They won’t know the full extent of it until they finish tests on him. He’s the worst off. Daniel suffered a concussion but he’s conscious and seems to be out of danger. Grace has cuts and bruises and is under observation. Rachel was in the rear of the van and wasn’t even hurt badly enough to be hospitalized. She’s with an emergency care family.”

“Thank you for letting me know in person,” Maggie said, her voice barely above a whisper. “Who did Sarah and Michael appoint guardians after Trent and I separated? She never said.”

Ed grimaced. “Actually, that’s why I’m here. They never did change that. You and Trent are still the guardians.”

“But Trent and I—”

“Will be divorced by the end of the year. But Sarah never believed it would happen. She said she was praying Trent would change his mind. I tried to convince her but—”

“Sarah is nothing if not stubborn.” Maggie felt her stomach bottom out. “Oh…was. She was.” Maggie bit back tears and pressed her fingertips tightly against her lips. If she started to cry now she might not be able to stop.

“There are going to be a lot of adjustments for you, Maggie.”

“But Trent isn’t going to change his mind. He doesn’t even want any contact with me.”

“Maggie, you left him.”

“And no one regrets that more than I do. I was wrong, but at the time I saw no other way. I guess I was trying to force him to change his mind about an adoption. But he didn’t, and I doubt he ever will.”

“It isn’t all that unusual,” Ed said, defending Trent. “He doesn’t want to raise someone else’s kids. But Michael believed that if something happened to them, Trent would feel differently about raising his own nieces and nephews. And you know as well as I do that Trent agreed to the guardianship without giving it any thought at all. The chance of something happening to both of them was one in a million. And Trent thought Michael led a charmed life, that nothing bad would ever happen to him.”

Maggie just stared at him, still stunned. She and Trent were still their guardians? It was all too much to take in. “Where is Trent, and how did he take the news?”

“He’s in Toronto on business. I called him before I came here. He sounded as if he was in shock at first. He’s utterly devastated, Maggie. You know how important Michael was to him. He’s flying to Florida as soon as he can get a flight. I don’t know when that will be.”

She thought of Sarah and Michael’s parents, of their loss. “Have Nancy and Albertine and Royce Osborne been told?”

Ed’s eyes shifted away. “No. I’ll tell them on my way to the airport. I’ve got us booked on a flight at six. That gives you about an hour-and-a-half to pack a bag and get to the airport.” Ed stood. “Meet me at Southern Air’s terminal entrance no later than five. Okay?”

Maggie’s first glimpse of Trent was at Mickey’s bedside the next morning. He was holding his eight-year-old nephew’s hand. Trent’s face was in profile, his black hair glinted with blue highlights in the sunlight from a nearby window. She stood there just feasting on his face, remembering the wonder and excitement of being held in his arms. Then Mickey’s ragged breath drew her attention.

He had tears in his eyes, and, when one fell, Trent reached up with a tissue to dry it before it ran into the boy’s blond hair. “Everything’s going to be all right, Mickey,” Trent was saying. “The doctors said not being able to feel your legs is normal right now. It doesn’t mean anything bad, yet.”

Last night when she’d arrived Mickey had been asleep, and it had seemed cruel to wake him with news of his parents’ deaths. With Trent not yet there, she had elected to wait to tell Mickey the bad news. Rachel had been another story. She’d been released to a foster family and was apparently inconsolable, having seen her mother dead at the scene and her father and brothers and sister taken off in ambulances.

Ed had remained at the hospital, and Maggie had gone to Rachel. Though the woman taking care of the six-year-old had been kind, she’d also been out of her depth trying to console a grief-stricken child. Maggie had calmed Rachel and reassured her. She’d finally lulled her into an exhausted sleep, but it had been a rough night as nightmares of the crash and its aftermath had haunted the small girl. Maggie had only gotten what little sleep she’d had by lying in the tiny twin bed with her.

This morning Rachel had clung to her, so leaving her behind with a stranger had been impossible. With no clear alternative, Maggie had brought her along to the hospital. Ed was now ensconced with Rachel in a waiting room.

“I want Mommy and Daddy. Where are they?” Mickey demanded.

Maggie let only a tiny sound of distress pass her lips, but Trent twisted in his seat and looked at her. His startling blue eyes were so filled with pain and confusion that it nearly broke her already shattered heart into even more pieces.

What do I say? those beloved eyes shouted at her.

Praying for the right words, Maggie walked in and stood behind Trent. She put her hand on his shoulder, and he stiffened. Maggie almost removed it, but after a few seconds he seemed to lean into her touch as if he needed her as much as she did him at that moment.

“Mickey,” she said.

The child’s eyes sought hers. “Aunt Maggie, do you know where Mommy and Daddy are?”

Trent moved closer, dropping to one knee near the head of the bed. His height allowed him the same vantage point he’d had before, and he kept hold of Mickey’s hand. Maggie settled into the hard plastic chair Trent had vacated.

“Do you? Do you know where they are?” he asked again.

Maggie nodded, and she saw Trent squeeze Mickey’s hand even more tightly. “Do you remember anything about the accident at all?” she asked.

“I woke up from the ambulance noise. Some man was strapping me into a hard bed thing. Rachel was crying and so was Grace.”

“A very big truck hit the van while you were sleeping. Everybody but Rachel was hurt. I heard Uncle Trent explaining that you can’t feel your legs because your back was injured. Daniel’s head is hurt but he’s doing fine. Grace was cut by glass and she’s doing “fine, too. But Mommy and Daddy were in the front of the van where the truck smashed into you. They were both hurt very badly, and the doctors just couldn’t help them. Honey, Mommy and Daddy have gone to heaven to be with Jesus.”

Tears filled Mickey’s eyes and poured out. His lower lip trembled. “When Pop-Pop Morris went to heaven, I could never see him again. They can’t come back to see me either, can they?”

“No honey, but they’ll be watching you and you’ll always have them right here,” she promised, laying her hand over Mickey’s heart. “We have to think of what’s best for them even though we miss them so very much that it makes us hurt. Because you see, they were both in such terrible pain that Jesus came to take them to heaven where they wouldn’t hurt anymore.”

“Do you think that before Jesus came for them they were as scared as I was ‘til Uncle Trent came to see me?”

Maggie’s eyes met Trent’s. “Oh, yes. But hurt and scared as your daddy was, he was more worried about you children. The last thing he did here on earth was to make sure the doctors knew to take care of all of you, and to call us.”

“Aunt Maggie, is it all right for me to be sad? I’m glad Jesus came for them, but I’m still sad.”

“Yes, honey. That’s just fine. I’m sad sometimes and miss my daddy. But I know Pop-Pop Morris would never want me to stay sad all the time.”

“I’m still scared, too. Who’s going to take care of us now? Who’s going to be our mommy and daddy?”

Maggie smiled, hoping to reassure the child, though all she felt was turmoil and conflict. “We will. Daddy and Mommy made us your guardians. That’s a big lawyer word that means Uncle Trent and I will always be here for you.”

Mickey’s eyes sought out Trent and his hand came up to pat Trent’s cheek. “Thank you for guarding me, Uncle Trent.” Mickey’s big brown eyes blinked, then closed.

Maggie waited a few moments. “He’s asleep, Trent,” she whispered. “Ed wants to talk to both of us.”

Trent let go of Mickey’s hand and stood. He looked down at her, his eyes angry. “That’s fine. But we’d better get a few things straight between us first.”

He turned and stalked to the hall. He was hurting, she reminded herself. Trent always processed hurt into anger. She’d never understood why until meeting his parents. They’d never react to something so subtle as hurt feelings. Hurt was something one was expected not to show, to get over alone and then to forget. However cold anger or righteous indignation were acceptable reactions.

Maggie took a deep breath and prayed for guidance, then stood and followed her husband into the hall.

“You did a great job with him,” Trent said. “I didn’t have a clue how to explain about Mike and Sarah. Thank you.”

“No thanks necessary. I just said what I believe and what Michael and Sarah would have wanted him to hear.”

“You were doing fine until you promised him we’d both be there for him. You know that isn’t the way it’s going to be.”

“No. I don’t know that. My name is on those guardianship papers, too. And I have no intention of stepping out of their lives when they need me so much. Any of their lives. Really, Trent, what do you propose we do? Split them up? You take the boys and I’ll take the girls? Increase their loss? Or are you prepared to care for four heartbroken children all by yourself?”

“It isn’t you who’ll be stepping out of their lives. It’ll be me. I’ve told you. I won’t be a father to children who aren’t mine. You left me because I wouldn’t adopt.”

“And I was wrong. I hurt you and I’m sorry, but this is different You love them already.”

“But not like a father would.”

“Michael entrusted you with the most precious gift God ever gave him. His children. How can you turn your back on them? Michael’s children. These kids are your own flesh and blood.”

Trent flinched. “Maggie, we’ve been down this route before.”

“But you love these kids. I’ve seen you with them.”

“You’ve seen an uncle, not a father. I’ll never care for them the way a father should. I know that about myself. Just believe me. Finally. Listen to me!”

Maggie stood in a state of complete shock as Trent marched off down the hall. So many thoughts rushed through her head that she had to steady herself by leaning against the wall. Had that been fear she’d just seen in his eyes? Was it that Trent didn’t want to try loving another person’s child, or was he afraid he couldn’t? But if that were the case, wouldn’t he have explained that to her rather than let his stubborn stand on adoption cause the end of their marriage?

She walked back to the waiting room, still trying to make sense of Trent’s anger. The real reason for his anger was usually something other than whatever appeared to be the cause. She tried to step back from the situation and consider what might be going on in his head, but found she was too close to it.

Trent was an adult, though, and would have to deal with his own problems on his own. He’d said often enough in the past three months that he didn’t want her in his life. She’d have to take him at his word. The children were all that mattered now. She had just been handed the job of single-handedly supplying security for four helpless lives. And Trent had certainly made it clear that he had no intention of sharing that burden.

Deep in thought, she wove her way through the solarium and stood before the glass wall of windows at the far side. She looked unseeingly up at the heavens, trying to come to terms with all that had happened. Trent’s brother was dead. Her best friend Sarah was gone, as well. And their beloved children—their gifts from God, as Sarah and Michael had always called them—were now Maggie’s responsibility. Alone.

“Aunt Maggie?”

Maggie turned from the windows and met Rachel’s troubled gaze. “Yes, pumpkin?”

“I feel sad. I keep thinking Mommy and Daddy are still here. Then I remember the accident.”

“It’ll be that way for all of us, for a while but it will get better and those bad memories will fade.”

“Mommy looked different after the accident happened. Really different. I think the policeman told me a lie. She didn’t look like she was asleep the way he said. Mommy and Daddy aren’t asleep, are they? Being in heaven’s not like asleep, is it?”

Maggie struggled for the right words, then remembered the service when her father had died and Jim Dillon’s explanation of death to the children. Rachel had been a toddler then, so she wouldn’t remember. Digging in her purse, Maggie found the peanuts she’d been given on the plane. “See this?” Rachel nodded. “Can you open it?” Rachel took a peanut and studiously opened it. “Now eat it. Chew it all up and swallow it,” Maggie instructed, then took the empty peanut shell and fit it back together. “It looks the same but something’s different, isn’t it? What’s different?” she asked.

“It’s empty now.” Her golden brown eyes were serious.

“That’s why Mommy looked so different. Because what you saw was like her shell. What Mommy really was—the really important part of her—was on the inside. Just like the peanut. Where’s the peanut now?”

“In my tummy.”

“That’s right. The peanut is inside you. And so are Mommy and Daddy. All the things they were, and did with you, and all that happiness and love, are tucked right inside of you. And that can make you stronger. Just like the peanut nourishes your body, Mommy and Daddy’s memory can nourish your soul All you have to do is close your eyes and remember a happy time. Let’s try it right now. Close your eyes and tell me what you see.”

“We had a picnic yesterday with our ice-cream cones. Daddy was sitting down, and Daniel was running around. He tripped and the ice cream came off the cone and fell right on Daddy’s head. Daddy looked so surprised and so did Daniel. Then Daddy growled and tackled Daniel and rubbed his gooey hair all over Daniel’s shirt, and the cold ice cream got on his tummy. We all just laughed and laughed. Then Mommy acted like they were bad and sent them to the washroom to get clean. It was really funny. Daddy pouted just like Daniel about having to get clean.” In a deep voice Rachel said, “‘Do I gotta? Do I gotta?’” Then she giggled. “He was so funny.” Her dark eyes flew open, and she hugged Maggie about the hips. “Oh, thank you, Aunt Maggie. I really do feel better.”

“I’m glad,” Maggie said and hugged Rachel against her. She smoothed a hand over her long strawberry-blond hair, and fought tears.

“Kids are so resilient,” Ed said as Rachel skipped off to the play area reserved for children in the corner of the large waiting room.

Maggie narrowed her teary eyes and considered Ed. “Why are you here?” she asked, then added, “Really. No more excuses.”

Ed’s dry chuckle vibrated in the room. “Always right to the point, aren’t you? Okay. I’m along because I want to make sure your guardianship is clearly established in Florida. It didn’t sound as if Mickey will be able to be moved to Pennsylvania any time soon.”

“And?” she prodded.

Ed sighed and gestured toward a grouping of sofas and chairs across the room. “Let’s sit down. We need to come up with a strategy in case his parents try something. The least I can do is make sure Michael’s wishes are carried out. He didn’t want those two getting their hands on his kids. He felt so strongly about it that he made me write it in his will.”

“How did his parents take the news of their deaths?” Maggie asked as she settled across from Ed.

“About the way you’d expect. They looked shocked at first, then ‘appropriately’ sad for a few seconds each. Next came the legal questions and annoyance that you and Trent were named guardians.”

“Sounds just like my loving parents,” Trent said from behind them. “What else did they say?” he asked as he walked to stand in front of them.

“That, in light of your separation, of course they would be happy to ‘take the kids off your hands,’ Trent.”

Anger flared in Maggie’s gaze. “Take them off Trent’s hands! I guess they knew their oldest son at least. He doesn’t want them. He just told me. And what did they say about me?”

“As far as they’re concerned, you don’t enter the equation. The children aren’t your blood relatives, so the Osbornes feel you have no rights regardless of their son’s will.” Ed fixed Trent with a steely look. “We’re in for trouble if you keep this up, Trent, because your parents will never let Maggie raise those kids alone. Not only should you not continue with the divorce, but I suggest you consider moving into Michael and Sarah’s house. Together.”