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CHAPTER TEN

DYLAN WAS TWITCHY for the next couple of days, though Emmy understood why. She’d been in the same situation herself, not so long ago.

On Saturday morning at breakfast, she said, ‘Right, you need to get out of the house.’

‘What?’ Dylan looked at her as if she were speaking Martian.

‘Waiting. It’s the pits. And if you stay in and try and concentrate on work, you’ll end up brooding. So you’re coming out with Ty and me to get some fresh air. Isn’t he, Ty?’

The baby gurgled and banged his spoon against the tray of his high chair. ‘Dih-dih!’

‘It sounds as if you have something in mind,’ Dylan said.

Emmy nodded. ‘I’ve been making a list of places to go with him. We can always go to the park with the slide and the swings on sunny days, but it’s no good on rainy or cold days. And this is one I’ve been looking forward to.’

* * *

She was mysterious about where they were going, and Dylan didn’t have a clue until they were standing outside what looked like an Edwardian greenhouse with a large banner that proclaimed it to be the House of Butterflies.

When they were inside, he discovered that the greenhouse was full of lush vegetation and had a slightly humid, warm atmosphere. He could hear the sound of water falling, so he realised there must be a fountain somewhere. There were butterflies of all sizes and colours, some huge and vivid. He’d never seen so many in one place before.

Ty seemed to love it, watching the butterflies opening and closing their wings as they perched on a flower or fluttered overhead. He reached out to them, waggling his fingers as if copying the movement of their wings.

‘Look—those people over there are standing very still, and the butterflies are landing on them,’ Emmy exclaimed, looking enchanted.

She tried it herself, and her face was suffused with wonder when a butterfly landed on her. Dylan wished for a second that he had a camera to capture that expression.

They wandered through the different sections of the enormous greenhouse, looking at the butterflies and the flowers; Dylan was surprised by how much it made him relax.

‘Thank you for bringing me here. I was getting a bit scratchy. Sorry, I haven’t been very nice to live with.’

She patted his arm, and the feel of her skin against his made him tingle. ‘That’s OK. I was the same when I was waiting. And you did the same for me, when you took me to the sea,’ she said. ‘I just thought this might be something different.’

‘I would never have thought to go to a butterfly house.’

‘To be fair, it hasn’t been open for that long, so you probably wouldn’t have known about it.’ She smiled at him. ‘Do you mind if I take a few photos?’

‘Sure, go ahead. I’ll take Ty.’

He took over the pushchair, and she took various photographs with her phone. Including, to his surprise, the roof of the greenhouse. He’d expected her to concentrate on the butterflies. Then again, Emmy seemed to see things in a different way from most people.

In the next section, there was a terrarium full of chrysalises, and they could actually see some of the pupae emerging from their cocoons.

‘That’s amazing. I never saw anything like that when I was a kid,’ Dylan said.

‘Did you have a garden?’

He nodded. ‘My grandparents had a huge garden, and my gran loved butterflies and bees—she had shrubs to attract them. My grandfather preferred the more practical stuff, growing fruit and vegetables. And I used to have to help weed the garden whenever I was there.’

‘Sounds as if you weren’t keen.’

‘I was a child,’ he said. ‘But I’ve never had a garden since.’

And they’d neglected Pete and Ally’s garden, just mowing the lawn.

In the section after, there was a waterfall and a pond with huge red and white goldfish. Emmy unbuckled Tyler from his pushchair and held him up so he had a good view of the pond. ‘See the red fish, Ty?’

‘Fiiih,’ said the little boy.

He saw the shock on Emmy’s face and the way she suddenly held Tyler that little bit tighter, as if she’d been near to dropping him. ‘Did you hear that, Dylan? He said “fish”!’

‘I heard.’ And it was crazy to feel so proud of him. Then again, Tyler was the nearest he’d ever get to having a son. Something he’d always thought he didn’t want, but now he knew he did.

Tyler clapped his hands with delight, and Emmy beamed at him. ‘Clever boy.’

* * *

This, Emmy thought, was the perfect day. Tyler learning a new word. Sharing this amazing spectacle with him and with Dylan. And the butterfly house definitely seemed to have taken Dylan’s mind off the wait to hear from Ted Burroughs.

In the next section, Dylan found a giant stripy caterpillar and pointed it out to the baby. ‘Hey, Tyler, what pillar doesn’t need holding up? A caterpillar!’

He chuckled, and the baby laughed back. And Emmy was enchanted. The joke was terrible, but Stuffy Dylan would never have done something like that. He was definitely changing and she really liked the man he was becoming.

‘We’ll have to take him to the zoo. I’ve noticed he really likes that tiger story you bought him,’ she said.

‘Maybe we could go next weekend?’ he suggested. ‘Though it’s your weekend off.’

‘No, that’d be good. I’d like that.’

‘And maybe we can look at planting things in the garden,’ he said, ‘flowers that butterflies really like. Then, next summer, when Tyler plays in the garden he might get to see a few butterflies.’

And maybe it would also bring back nice memories of his grandmother, Emmy thought. Dylan had mentioned her before; and she had the strongest feeling that he’d been closer to his grandmother than he was to his mother. He certainly missed her, from what he’d let slip.

‘That’s a great idea,’ she said. ‘Though I had a flat so I’m afraid I’m not much of a gardener. I tended to have cut flowers rather than houseplants. Ally bought me a couple and...well, let’s just say I don’t have green fingers.’

‘We’ll learn,’ he said. ‘Looking after a garden can’t be any harder than bringing up a baby, and we’re managing fine with Tyler.’

Emmy felt warm inside that not only were they working together as a team, he was also acknowledging that. And this was beginning to feel like being part of a real family. It was taking time, but they were finally bonding.

She was fascinated by the terrarium with the dragonflies in the next section. ‘Just look at the colours,’ she said, pointing them out to Tyler. ‘Blue and green dragonflies.’

‘Fiiih,’ the baby said again.

She laughed and rubbed the tip of her nose against his. ‘Fly, sweetie, not fish. But I guess they both sort of have scales.’

When they stopped in the café, she mashed a banana for Tyler and leaned down to feed him in his pushchair while Dylan went to get the coffee. When Tyler had finished, she scooped him onto her lap and cuddled him with one arm while she made a couple of quick sketches in the notebook she always carried in her handbag.

Dylan put the coffees on the table, out of Tyler’s reach. ‘What are you doing?’ he asked.

‘Just noting down a couple of ideas for jewellery.’

He looked intrigued. ‘So this sort of thing is where you get your inspiration?’

‘Sort of,’ she hedged.

‘Sorry, is this a creative thing? You don’t like to talk about work in progress?’

‘No, it’s fine.’ She felt relaxed enough with him to know that he wasn’t like her exes—he was asking because he was interested, not because he wanted her to stop or thought he had better ideas that she ought to go along with. She pushed her notebook across the table to him. ‘Have a look through if you want to. Sometimes I take pictures, sometimes I sketch.’

He flicked through the pages. ‘That spiderweb reminds me a bit of that necklace you made.’

‘With the heart in the middle rather than the spider?’ She smiled. ‘You’re right, that was the inspiration. It was a frosty morning and the cobwebs were really visible. They looked incredibly pretty, delicate yet strong at the same time.’

He reached the page where she’d sketched a couple of pictures of Tyler asleep. ‘I had no idea you could draw. I mean, I knew you designed stuff, but that’s not the same as a portrait. These are really good.’

‘Thank you. I was working while he was napping and I just thought he looked so cute and peaceful. I couldn’t resist it.’

He handed the book back to her. ‘Very cute. So you carry a notebook all the time?’

‘Yes. Because you never know when you’re going to see something that sets off an idea,’ she explained. ‘Though I guess it’s not quite like that with your job.’

He smiled. ‘No, it’s talking to the client that does that.’ He indicated the slice of chocolate cake he’d bought. ‘Would you like some of this?’

‘Thanks, but I’m fine.’ Mr Stuffy had changed absolutely, Emmy thought. A couple of months ago, he would barely have spoken to her. Now he was offering to share cake with her, for all the world as if they were partners.

Though she knew better than to kid herself. Yes, Dylan was attractive. Especially when you saw past the superficial eye-candy stuff to the real smile, the one that lit up his eyes. He could tempt her to break every single one of her rules and fall in love with him.

But then what? She couldn’t take the risk. If she had an affair with Dylan, she knew it would be amazing at first. But then it would go the way of all her other relationships and end in tears. Hers.

Dylan flicked through the leaflet he’d picked up at the counter. ‘Did you know that a butterfly tastes through its feet?’

She raised an eyebrow. ‘You expect me to believe that?’

‘Seriously, a butterfly can’t bite or chew food. It just sucks everything up with a proboscis, so it has to taste things through sensors in its feet.’

‘Did you hear that, Ty?’ She traced circles on his palm, making the baby giggle.

‘Round and round the garden,’ Dylan said.

He knew this? Then again, she’d noticed what he’d been reading. He’d left child development books in the living room. Being Dylan, he took things seriously and did it the geek way. ‘Like a teddy bear,’ she said.

‘One step.’ He put a finger on Tyler’s wrist.

‘Two step.’ She put a finger on Tyler’s elbow.

‘And a tickle under there.’ He tickled Tyler under the armpit, and the baby’s rich chuckle rang out.

‘Come to me so Em can drink her coffee?’ Dylan asked, holding his arms out.

Tyler echoed him, holding his arms out to be picked up. ‘Dih-dih!’

Dylan scooped him up. ‘How did he do with the banana?’

‘He ate about three-quarters of it.’

‘Good boy. Is the milk in his bag?’

‘Sure is.’ And how Dylan had come on as a father, she thought. In the early days, he’d been wary, unsure of himself. Now, he was confident, and Tyler responded to that. The baby clearly adored him.

She could easily adore Dylan, too—the man he’d become.

But she needed to keep her burgeoning feelings under control. This was as good as it was going to get, so she was going to enjoy it for what it was and not let herself wish for more. Even though, secretly, she did wish for more.

They really did look cute together, Tyler cuddled on Dylan’s lap, holding his own bottle and yet with Dylan’s hand held just under it as a safety net. She couldn’t resist taking a picture on her phone. ‘That’s lovely. I’ll send it to Ally’s and Pete’s parents.’

‘I was talking to them the other night,’ Dylan said. ‘They told me you write to them every week with pictures and updates.’

She shrugged. ‘Well, they don’t really use email. It’s nearly the same, just that I print it out rather than send it electronically. It’s not a big deal.’

‘It’s nice of you to bother, though.’

‘Just because they’ve lost their children, it doesn’t mean they have to lose their grandson as well,’ she said. Then an idea hit her. ‘Would you like to send a copy of this photo to your mum? I could send it to your phone, or even directly to her if that’s easier for you.’

‘No, it’s OK.’ But it was as if she’d thrown up a brick wall between them, because he went quiet on her.

What had she said?

They’d talked about sending a picture to Tyler’s grandparents and she’d suggested sending it to his own mother, too. And it wasn’t the first time he’d gone quiet on her after the subject of his parents had cropped up.

Clearly there was some kind of rift there, and she’d just trampled on a really sore spot.

‘I’m sorry, Dylan. I didn’t mean to...’ Help. Given that the intensely private man seemed to be back, how could she phrase this without making it worse? ‘I’m sorry,’ she said again.

He sighed. ‘It’s not your fault. Sorry. I’m stressing about the contract. I shouldn’t take it out on you.’

She let it go, but still she wondered. She’d noticed that Dylan’s mother had never visited or even called the house. He’d said before that his mother was travelling, so maybe she was somewhere with poor phone connections, or maybe she just called him during office hours, when he wasn’t in the house. But it was as if almost everything to do with Dylan’s family was in a box marked ‘extra private, do not touch’.

They still hadn’t quite got that easiness and family feeling back by the time they’d finished in the café and went to the gift shop.

Until she spied the butterfly mobile. ‘That’s lovely. We can put it over his cot. It’d look great with the stars from his nightlight floating over it, and he’ll see it first thing in the morning when he wakes.’

‘Mmm.’ Dylan didn’t sound that enthusiastic, but she knew he secretly liked the nightlight.

They continued to browse, and Dylan picked up a board book. ‘We need to get this.’

She glanced at it; it was a story about a caterpillar, and there was a finger puppet. So New Dylan was back. Stuffy Dylan might have read a grudging bedtime story, but New Dylan would read it with voices and props so a child would really enjoy it. She grinned. ‘You like doing bedtime stories, don’t you?’

‘Yes. If anyone had told me I’d like doing all the voices, I would’ve said they were crazy. But I do.’ He looked a bit wistful. ‘I wish Pete was here to share it. He would’ve loved this.’

‘So would Ally,’ she said softly. ‘And you know what? I think they’re looking down on us right now, hugging each other and saying they made exactly the right choice.’

To her surprise, he reached over to touch her cheek. ‘Know what? I agree.’

Emmy felt warm all over. Right now they were definitely in accordance. And nothing felt better than this.