Читать книгу Greek Affairs - Кейт Хьюит - Страница 27
CHAPTER SIX
ОглавлениеKATIE stared at the thin blue line in disbelief. According to the test she was pregnant! How could that be—how could she have had a negative result four weeks ago and now this? Maybe she’d done the first test too early. Or maybe this test was faulty, she thought frantically. Perhaps she should buy another kit? Third time lucky and all that …
If it weren’t so serious it would be funny. Because, deep down, she knew that this result was the right one.
She kept the leaflet that came with the kit and threw everything else away. Then, in a state of shock, she left the ladies’ room and merged into the crowds of shoppers in the busy department store.
Saks of Fifth Avenue was a strange place to discover that she was pregnant, she thought as she walked dazedly through one department after another. But then all her surroundings were rather bizarre at the moment. Would it have been better to find out at Alexi’s apartment? Or on board his ship? Maybe four weeks ago back at the shipping office before she had finished with him would have been better, but the truth was it wouldn’t have made much difference. There was no best time or place because it was an absolute disaster!
How was she going to tell him? The question seared through her like an instrument of torture.
Maybe she shouldn’t tell him at all. Maybe she should just check herself into a clinic somewhere and have it dealt with secretly. It was probably what he would want her to do, especially if the rumours about why his marriage had failed were true.
Alexi had never talked much to her about his marriage. She knew it had only lasted twelve months, but that was all she knew. Every time she had tried to draw him out on the subject he had clammed up or changed the conversation abruptly. It had been obvious that he didn’t want to discuss it, and she hadn’t wanted to press the subject, hadn’t wanted him to know how much she would have liked to know the facts. Reading between the lines, she guessed Alexi had loved Andrea; he must have done to have committed to her. But they had wanted different things out of life and it had made him determined to steer clear of another full-blown relationship.
Eight years was a long time to be on his own, and she’d heard it said that if a man didn’t remarry within the first couple of years after a split then it was unlikely he ever would.
In Alexi’s case that was probably very true.
She noticed suddenly that she was entering the mother-and-child department. Pictures of pregnant mothers looked down at her, the women all radiantly happy in maternity wear that showed off their proud bumps.
Katie did an abrupt about-turn. She couldn’t walk through there! Out of the corner of her eye she saw a cot, decorated with lace and pink frills.
It was fragile and sweet, and enough to intensify the cold churning feelings inside of her.
Could she really go through with an abortion?
And, if she didn’t, how would she manage with a baby on her own? She had always sworn that she would wait until the time was right for her to have a child, because she wanted to give her baby all the things she had missed in her childhood; she wanted her to feel secure and loved. She wanted a tightly knit family unit … and that unit included a loving father.
This situation was far from her ideal dream. And how would she work and look after a child? Her job demanded long hours.
She couldn’t think straight. She couldn’t decide how she was going to deal with this at all!
The blare of traffic and bright sunshine hit her senses as she left the store, and it was a relief to slide into the waiting limousine and sink back into the comfortable darkened interior.
As the car sped smoothly through the traffic Katie remembered the look in Alexi’s eyes only this morning when she had mentioned wanting a meaningful relationship. The word ‘fatherhood’ would probably freak him out completely! A baby was the biggest commitment in life.
Katie had never felt more alone in her life. And she suddenly had an overwhelming need to speak to her sister; she needed someone who would understand how she was feeling right now, and Lucy was that person.
Without even stopping to think about what time it was in France, she took out her mobile and dialled the number. But all she got was her sister’s messaging service. Disappointed, Katie hung up. This wasn’t the kind of predicament that could be revealed in a voicemail message.
She closed her eyes and tried to relax, tried to think logically.
When was her last period—how far into the pregnancy would she be? By her reckoning, it was only two months. However she did need to get to a doctor as soon as possible to have things verified.
Katie didn’t open her eyes again until the car had pulled up down at the dock area and the chauffeur came round to open the door for her.
A warm breeze washed over her, filled with the tangy scent of the ocean, and she took deep breaths of the fresh air.
The Octavia was berthed a few metres away. She was a sleek ocean-going liner with stylishly impressive lines. Katie had worked on some of the correspondence connected with this vessel, and she knew she was one of the most prestigious ships in Alexi’s fleet, and possessed luxurious passenger accommodation and reception areas, a shopping mall, some top celebrity-chef restaurants and even a chapel.
If circumstances had been different she might have enjoyed going aboard. But right now all she could think about was escaping. How could she have lunch with Alexi and pretend that nothing was amiss? Things had been difficult before, but they were impossible now!
She made her way down towards the gangplank where a man in uniform was waiting.
He wanted to see her passport before allowing her on board, and she fished it out for him.
‘Welcome to the Octavia, Ms Connor,’ he said as he scanned it and handed it back. ‘Mr Demetri has left a message for you to go directly to his private quarters on the top floor. Have a nice day.’
Katie continued up the gangplank and was directed towards the lift at the end of the corridor.
She was going to have to tell Alexi. The first clear thought struck her as the lift doors opened on the top deck of the ship and she walked out. This wasn’t something she could keep secret.
This was about a baby, a living entity. It wasn’t just about her any more. And Alexi had a right to know.
Katie found his private suite without any difficulty; it was a few yards down from the lift. But she stood outside for a few moments, trying to gather her composure before knocking.
Her hand was poised above the door when it swung open. Alexi was on the phone taking a business call, but he waved her inside.
‘This has happened before, and I can’t have someone on the team making those kinds of mistakes,’ he told someone forcefully. ‘You will just have to get rid of him straight away. Time is of the essence.’
He sounded ruthless and determined, and Katie felt her insides tighten as she stepped into the cabin. Would he use that same forceful tone on her when she told him her news?
Get rid of it straight away. The words rebounded inside her.
And she realised with a sudden, frightening thud of reality that that wasn’t what she wanted at all. She wanted this baby.
‘When you’ve sorted the situation, phone me back.’ Alexi hung up and glanced over at her.
For a moment there was silence between them.
She wanted their child, and she wanted Alexi to take her into his arms and tell her that everything would be OK.
She really was losing her grip on reality now, she thought angrily, because when she told him her news there was no way that was going to happen.
‘So, how was the shopping?’ Alexi took his jacket off and she was momentarily distracted by the sheer power of his body, the way his broad shoulders tapered down to the narrow hips.
‘It was OK.’ She tried to smile coolly.
‘Did you get what you wanted?’
The question and the way his eyes flicked over her made the tension inside her escalate.
‘Yes, thanks.’ Somehow she managed to sound controlled.
She looked around her. Through an open doorway she could see a large double-bed. Swiftly she pulled her gaze away from that and concentrated on the lounge area where they were standing.
White, curving leather furniture followed the round contours of one side of the room, and to the other side large sliding doors gave a spectacular view out over a private deck and swimming pool. The soaring Manhattan skyline in the distance was a dramatic backdrop.
‘You looked deep in thought outside the door.’ The sudden observation made her look back at him with a frown.
‘What do you mean?’
He waved towards a security monitor on the wall that showed the outside corridor, and she realised he’d been watching her when she’d stood outside.
‘There are cameras all over the place.’ He looked at her with a wry smile. ‘Part of the new security measures we have introduced.’
‘Very Big Brother,’ she said flippantly.
‘It has its uses.’ He glanced at his watch. ‘I ordered us lunch, by the way. I took a wild guess at what you would want.’
‘Did you? How very cavalier of you.’
Alexi glanced over and his eyes held a sudden gleam of amusement. ‘The house salad … and a side order of fries. Sound about right?’
It was what she had always ordered when they were having a working lunch. And she had always joked that she shouldn’t eat the fries, but that they were her one sin for the afternoon. And Alexi would smile and say we’ll see about that!
She didn’t want to remember things like that. She didn’t want to remember the ease and the passion between them—because it hadn’t been real, she reminded herself fiercely. And it didn’t help with this situation now.
She shrugged. ‘To be honest, I’m not really that hungry.’
He frowned. ‘Are you still feeling ill?’
‘No, I’m not ill.’ She looked away from him. ‘But you’re right, I should eat something. Thanks.’
Before he could comment further there was a knock on the door.
It was the staff with their lunch. Katie was very glad of the interruption. She watched as a table was put out on a shady part of the deck and laid with a pristine-white cloth and silverware. The scene looked inviting and intimate—nothing like a working lunch.
This was probably the best time to tell him. The knowledge thumped through her as they were left alone again.
Alex held the door open for her to precede him out to the table, and she practised the words in her head: Alexi, I think I’m pregnant. But don’t worry, I’ll deal with it myself.
The pronouncement filtered through her like ice water.
Being a single mother was going to be hard … really hard. Just say she made all the same mistakes her mother had made? Just say she went from one bad relationship to another and her baby never knew security, never knew a loving father. She stopped the panic-stricken thoughts before they could start to get a grip.
This wasn’t helping. Lots of women brought up children alone and they made a brilliant job of it. She would be one of those women—she was nothing like her mother.
‘Glass of wine?’ Alexi asked.
‘I won’t, thanks. We have a lot of work to get through this afternoon,’ she said firmly.
‘Always so sensible,’ he murmured.
She didn’t feel particularly sensible, she felt like she was drowning in a sea of reckless uncertainty. But she forced herself just to smile. ‘That’s one of the reasons you like having me around, isn’t it? Or so you used to tell me.’
‘One of the reasons … yes.’ His dark eyes seemed to burn into her. ‘The other reason is that you blend sexy with sensible so well. It’s a unique combination, very hard to resist.’
The husky words jarred inside her.
‘Don’t mock me, Alexi.’
He frowned, something in her tone touching him. She looked very young suddenly, and very vulnerable. ‘Katie, I wasn’t mocking you,’ he said quietly.
For a few short moments the air between them seemed to overflow with emotions that Katie couldn’t fathom. All she knew was that she wanted to go into his arms so badly that it hurt.
But there was no going back, she reminded herself firmly, especially now.
If she allowed him to touch her, allowed him to take her to bed, it would just be sex. Alexi had nothing to offer her in the way of commitment. There would always be the next conquest waiting for him.
Their eyes clashed across the table.
And maybe now wasn’t the right time to tell him about the baby. She didn’t think she was strong enough; her emotions were all over the place, and she needed to be really sure about what she wanted before she could discuss it with him.
She sought for a means of escape and found it in work. ‘How do you think my ideas went down at the meeting today?’ she asked, taking off her jacket, trying to act as if she didn’t notice the mood between them.
Alexi knew that she was deliberately hiding behind work. His eyes flicked down over her, noticing how her white shirt was unbuttoned just enough to show the lacy curve of her bra. He felt the heat of desire escalate inside him, and he wondered if he should allow her to hide from the real agenda between them quite so easily.
Then he looked back into her eyes and saw the glimmer of answering need, mixed with a sudden helplessness. It was an expression he’d never seen in her eyes before.
After a slight hesitancy he allowed her to escape, allowed the conversation to continue. ‘There were a few people who seemed unsure about whether or not you could achieve the results in such a short time-frame,’ he said nonchalantly. ‘But all in all I think your ideas were well received.’
What was really going through her mind? Alexi wondered as he poured them both a glass of water from the jug on the table. He knew she still desired him … and he had the sudden very strong feeling that this was about more than her just wanting to move on. ‘I also think you are going to have to spend some more money on advertising,’ he continued. ‘Your figures aren’t stacking up in that particular area.’
‘Yes they are!’ Katie frowned. ‘I’ve researched thoroughly, and it is a balanced plan of action between TV and the national papers. It will be enough for an initial launch.’
‘Ah, but we don’t want it to be just enough, we want it to be lavish and extravagant.’
Alexi sat back and watched as she defended her schedule. Her eyes were vivid with enthusiasm now.
She put the water down and reached for her briefcase. ‘We can run through the figures again, if you want?’ She took out the notes she had made earlier and placed them on the table beside her plate.
It was as if she was building a barricade, Alexi thought wryly. And he wasn’t going to allow her to go that far! It was time to move to the truth … reel her in.
‘I don’t think so.’ He met her eyes steadily. ‘I think we have other things to talk about over lunch. Time enough for that conversation later.’
Immediately the wary light was back in her eyes. ‘Alexi, if this is about what happened between us earlier today then I really don’t think there is anything else to say.’
‘Don’t you?’ He fixed her with that steady look that seemed to burn into her consciousness.
And she could feel herself colouring up as the enormity of the lie hit her. There was something else to say … something he needed to know.
Her mobile phone started to ring and she took it out of her bag with a decidedly shaky hand and looked at the screen. It was her sister.
‘Excuse me …’ She started to push her chair back from the table. ‘I’m going to have to take this call.’
‘No, you are not.’ Alexi reached out and calmly took it off her and severed the connection.
‘How dare you do that?’ She got to her feet and glared at him, furious with him.
‘You can phone whoever it is back later.’ Alexi put the phone down on the table and sat back with a frown. Something was wrong, and he couldn’t put a finger on what it was. Maybe it was nothing. Maybe it was just that he wasn’t used to being given the runaround like this. He didn’t like it; he felt edgy and uneasy.
‘Sit down,’ he ordered.
For a moment she didn’t comply, but then he looked at her with those ruthlessly intense eyes and she did as she was told, her heart thumping unmercifully hard against her chest.
‘We need to clear the air, Katie.’
‘I don’t think we can.’ She said the words with a sudden raw honesty. ‘I think I need to give my notice in!’ The words spilled out before she could think about them, before she could stop them. OK, it wasn’t something she had planned to do: she would be pregnant without a job! But she would get something else, she told herself. Anything else. She needed to get away.
That sudden fact burned with real force. She couldn’t stay—not now that she was expecting his child. It would be a disaster—it would be impossible!
Alexi’s eyes narrowed on her. ‘I think that’s called running away, Katie.’
‘I think it’s called being realistic.’ She raised her chin and glared at him.
‘You’ve signed a four-month contract with the company. That is being realistic’ He frowned. ‘This isn’t like you, Katie,’ he remarked abruptly. ‘You and I are very similar, we both put work first. And you’ve only just started on this project! Now you want to run away because of the chemistry between us?’
He sounded angry and his eyes seemed to burn into hers.
She needed to tell him about the baby … she needed to say it now!
A breeze fluttered the papers that Katie had left next to her and suddenly they flurried everywhere, over the table and down over the deck, making them both spring up to catch them.
Their hands met as they both reached for the last page before it blew into the pool, and Katie let go as if she had been burnt. Slowly they both stood up. He was very close to her, and she felt an ache of need to just go into his arms.
‘So what is this about, Katie?’ he asked her softly. ‘Surely it’s not just about the fact that you kissed me this morning? That there is still a sexual attraction between us?’
Her cheeks flared with colour. She noticed he’d said she’d kissed him, not the other way around. And he was right; she had been the one to reach for him. The fact stung through her with humiliating clarity.
Her mobile was ringing again. She wrenched away from him angrily and went to pick it up.
‘Hi, Lucy … can I phone you back a bit later? I can’t talk right now.’ As she was speaking she watched Alexi open the front flap of her briefcase to put the papers away.
Then she stiffened as she saw him glance at the leaflet she had placed in there earlier.
He looked at it, and then looked at it again, then he pulled it out of the bag.
‘Why is there a leaflet about pregnancy in amongst your work papers?’ he asked coolly.
He transferred his gaze over towards her as she put the phone down. ‘Katie, what is this about?’