Читать книгу Greek Affairs - Кейт Хьюит - Страница 28
CHAPTER SEVEN
ОглавлениеSHOCK ricocheted through Alexi as he watched the blood drain from her face, and suddenly things started to fall into place.
‘I asked you a question, Katie.’ He walked over and placed the leaflet down in front of her, and their eyes met. ‘What is this?’
The coolness of his voice was not in keeping with the sudden flame in his eyes.
‘It’s the real reason I can’t stay …’ she whispered the words uncomfortably. ‘I’m pregnant, Alexi.’
It was hard to tell what was running through Alexi’s mind. His dark eyes were now inscrutable. She could see a pulse beating at the side of his jaw. ‘Is the baby mine?’ he demanded at last.
‘Of course it’s yours!’ She took a step back from him, her distress escalating at the question.
‘So how long have you been keeping this from me?’
‘I haven’t been keeping it from you! I’ve just told you now!’
‘Because you had to!’
She’d known of course that he would be angry, but the full extent of the rage she glimpsed in his eyes at that moment was truly scary.
‘That’s not true.’ She brushed her hands tiredly over her face. ‘I was working up to it, I just didn’t know how to tell you.’
He didn’t say anything to that.
‘To be honest with you, Alexi, I haven’t come to terms with the fact myself yet,’ she continued heatedly.
The expression in his eyes didn’t change.
‘I was trying to think things through properly, allow my mind to clear so that I would know what I wanted to do before we talked.’
‘And how long was that going to take?’
She had never heard so much hostility in his tone.
‘Would it have been before you got rid of the baby, or after?’
‘How dare you say something like that to me?’ Anger rose like bile in her throat.
‘How dare you try to hide this from me?’ He came closer, and she could see condemnation etched in his expression like stone. ‘Is this the reason you gave in your notice the first time around?’
‘No! I didn’t know I was pregnant back then!’ She was horrified by the accusation. ‘I admit I did a test before we split up, but it came back negative. It scared the hell out of me, Alexi, it made me realise that our casual affair was dangerous territory!’
He stepped back from her.
‘Then I started to feel sick this morning, and I nearly passed out at the meeting, and suddenly I started to wonder if the test I did back then was accurate.’
She watched as he raked a hand through the darkness of his hair. ‘So in a panic I ran out and bought another one today. I couldn’t believe it when it came back with a positive result! I … I didn’t know what to say, what to do …’
He shook his head. ‘So the first thing you do is try to quit your job—try and walk away without even telling me.’ His voice was dry.
‘For heaven’s sake, Alexi, give me a break! My emotions are all over the place.’ Her voice cracked. ‘I admit I haven’t been thinking straight. But I’m probably still in shock!’
He nodded as if he accepted that, but the silence between them was loaded with tension.
‘So this morning, when you talked about wanting a more serious relationship, were you thinking about this situation?’ He asked the question bluntly.
‘No, I wasn’t even contemplating this situation!’ Her head jerked up and for a second her eyes blazed into his. ‘And you don’t need to worry, Alexi. You’re not involved in this at all. This is my baby. And if I do decide to go ahead with the pregnancy I won’t want anything from you,’ she continued emphatically. ‘You won’t be committed to anything, time or money.’
Something in Alexi’s eyes hardened now. ‘You can think again about that, Katie,’ he said quietly. ‘I’m involved in this whether you like it or not!’
‘You can’t force me into making a decision I don’t want! I will do what’s right for me at the end of the day—’
‘But this isn’t just about you any more!’ He cut across her angrily.
‘Do you think I don’t know that?’ She flared. ‘The responsibility for this feels huge, it’s already crushing me.’
‘Which is why we will have to share it.’ His tone was resolved.
‘We don’t have to do anything of the kind!’
‘Don’t fight me on this, Katie, because you will lose.’ The strength of his tone made her quake inside.
He walked away from her and looked out across the water towards the distant skyline of Manhattan. And for a long moment neither spoke.
‘You can’t make me have a termination if I don’t want one!’ Her voice trembled.
‘I haven’t mentioned the word “termination”.’ He looked around at her calmly.
‘Yet.’ She glared at him. ‘But I know what you are thinking. You’re thinking that if you pay for a private clinic and an abortion that that will absolve you—that will be your share of the responsibility, or at least as much of a share as you would want.’ Her words were tinged with bitter emphasis. ‘You just want the problem to go away.’
‘You don’t know the first thing about what I’m thinking right now!’ he told her heavily.
‘I know you! I know that you are commitment-phobic—and that you are the last person in the world who would want to become a dad!’
‘I admit since my marriage ended I’ve steered clear of serious relationships.’ He turned and gave her his full attention again. ‘But that doesn’t give you the right to judge me over this!’
She looked at him through narrowed eyes. ‘You didn’t want children when you were married, never mind now! I’ve heard the rumours.’
He became very still. ‘Have you, indeed?’
‘Yes! You didn’t want children and your ex-wife did.’ Katie waded in; she was past caring what he thought now. ‘So don’t stand there pretending to be something you are not. Don’t think you can pull the wool over my eyes, and then gently suggest an expensive little clinic when the moment’s right!’
‘You don’t know what the hell you are talking about, Katie.’ Alexi’s voice was low, but filled with such a quiet fury that it made her shiver.
‘I’m sorry.’ She was momentarily back-footed. ‘I probably shouldn’t have said that.’
‘No you shouldn’t!’
‘You’ve never talked about your marriage with me, so—’
‘So you went with the gossip-mongers’ version of events.’ He looked at her scathingly. ‘Just for the record, Katie, I loved my wife—and I would have done anything for her. But you’re right—once my marriage broke up I decided it was an institution best avoided. I decided not to invest again in any real relationships. Casual affairs were all I wanted, and I certainly had no plans to start a family.’
Katie tried to ignore how that acknowledgement made her feel, tried to quash down the pain that simmered beneath the surface. She knew she didn’t mean anything to him. It was old news, she told herself staunchly.
She tipped her chin up proudly. ‘So you don’t need to concern yourself with this pregnancy now. Because I’m not asking you to invest in anything, Alexi—emotionally or otherwise. I saw the way you looked at me this morning when I even mentioned wanting a meaningful relationship! And don’t worry,’ she continued hurriedly, ‘I really wasn’t hinting at anything, I really didn’t know I was pregnant at that moment. And I meant it when I said I didn’t think we would be right together. What we had was just a fling, it wasn’t supposed to end like this!’
‘No, it wasn’t,’ he agreed with her quietly. ‘We were careful, we took precautions. But accidents happen.’
Something inside Katie twisted.
His eyes held with hers. ‘It’s how we deal with this from here on in that matters now.’
She nodded and tried to swallow down a lump in her throat.
Alexi noticed how tired she looked suddenly, her eyes over-bright in the pallor of her face. And he remembered how she had nearly passed out this morning. ‘You need to sit down,’ he said abruptly.
The sudden concern in his voice was not welcome. And it helped her to pull herself together. She didn’t want his kindness; she would rather have dealt with his anger, at least it was fervently meant. ‘I’m fine, Alexi.’ She met his gaze defiantly. ‘I’m not an invalid, and I don’t need you to start treating me like one.’
He smiled at that. ‘That was the furthest thing from my mind, believe me. But you should sit down, and you should eat something.’ He moved back to the table. ‘You haven’t eaten all day.’
The last thing she felt like doing was eating—especially seated opposite him. Her throat felt so tightly closed with emotion that she felt the food might choke her.
But she did as he suggested and reached for a glass of water.
For a few moments there was silence between them.
‘How far do you think the pregnancy has progressed?’ He asked the question almost casually as he settled back into his chair.
‘Two months—I think.’ She shrugged and couldn’t meet his gaze now. ‘I’ll get everything confirmed by a doctor.’
‘I’ll make an appointment for you to see Richard Hall this afternoon.’
She looked over at him questioningly.
‘He’s the ship’s doctor,’ Alexi enlightened her.
‘How convenient.’
‘Yes,’ he agreed with her briskly. ‘And we’ll take it from there.’
‘You suddenly sound like you are organising a business campaign,’ she muttered angrily.
‘We have to be practical, Katie.’
Their eyes met, and Katie wanted to tell him that she would have given anything to put practicality to one side right now. And that she longed just to be held in his arms. But she forced herself to just agree, because he was right, and because anything else would be foolish in the extreme. ‘Yes, of course.’
‘You may as well take the rest of the afternoon off,’ he continued as he glanced at his watch.
‘I’d rather keep busy, and we have a meeting at three.’
‘We’ve dealt with the important stuff this morning. You can miss the next meeting.’
Alexi’s mobile started to ring and he snapped it up impatiently. ‘I’ll be there in a minute,’ he told whoever was at the end of the line before closing the connection again. ‘I have to go, Katie. I’ll ask the doctor to ring you so you can make that appointment and we’ll discuss things later.’
Katie shrugged. There was no point arguing with Alexi when he used that tone.
Richard Hall was a pleasant man in his late forties. He’d given Katie a thorough examination and then declared that she was in perfect health and just over two months pregnant.
‘Congratulations,’ he’d told her jovially. ‘You are going to have an early and very special Christmas present. I’d say the baby is due about the twentieth of December.’
She was lying back on the bed in the cabin now, trying to get her head around everything. Trying to visualise her small flat at Christmas—the usual decorations, the cards, the Christmas tree, the baby’s cot! It seemed unreal.
But it was real, she told herself powerfully. And she wanted this baby with all her heart. That certainty was growing stronger and stronger inside her. No matter what Alexi said to her, he wasn’t going to make her change her mind about that.
All right, it would be difficult to manage alone, and realistically she knew she would struggle financially. It would probably help her to keep her job here with Alexi—it was only a four-month contract, but it would enable her to save enough for a decent nest-egg. After that she could look around for part-time work.
The trouble was that she didn’t think she was emotionally strong enough to stay around Alexi, and her first instinct of just quitting and walking away was still spinning around temptingly. After all, what kind of an atmosphere would there be if she stayed? If Alexi wanted her to get rid of the baby and she refused it could be grim. On the other hand she couldn’t bear his reluctant conformity either … or his charity.
She closed her eyes as she remembered his reaction to her news. His anger had been even more intense than she had expected, and then it was as if he had undergone an almost steely resignation.
The memory made her curl up into a tight ball.
Snippets of his conversation kept playing painfully through her mind.
Just for the record, Katie, I loved my wife—and I would have done anything for her … I decided not to invest again in any real relationships. Casual affairs were all I wanted, and I certainly had no plans to start a family.
She put her hand protectively on her stomach. ‘We’ll manage without him,’ she whispered fiercely. ‘We don’t need him.’
The sound of the main cabin-door opening made her sit up. Hurriedly she got to her feet and checked her appearance in the mirror over the dressing table.
She looked pale, and her hair was loose and tousled around her shoulders. But there wasn’t much she could do about her appearance, as she’d left her bag out in the lounge area of the cabin. She combed her fingers through her hair and rubbed her lips together to get some colour back into them.
‘Katie?’ There was a knock on the bedroom door. Before she could gather herself to answer, Alexi opened the door.
His eyes moved over her, assessing her with almost ruthless intensity. ‘How are you feeling?’
‘Fine.’ She wanted to say something flippant like, and still pregnant, but she held her tongue. There was a ton of emotion churning inside her. He looked so casually handsome, jacket slung over his shoulder, his white shirt unbuttoned at the neck.
‘How did the meeting go?’ She asked the question more for something to say than any real interest.
‘The accountants were impressed with your plans.’ He came into the room and tossed the jacket down onto the chair in the corner. ‘You’ll be pleased to know they backed your ideas one-hundred percent.’
‘Good.’
He transferred his attention over to her completely now.
This was all a little too intimate for Katie’s peace of mind. To the outsider it would have looked as if they were a couple, perfectly at ease together in the bedroom. But they were not. She was anything but at ease.
‘I saw the doctor,’ she told him awkwardly.
‘Yes, he told me, you’re just over two months pregnant.’
Her eyes widened slightly. ‘He told you?’
Alexi frowned. ‘Is there a problem with that?’
‘Yes, there’s a problem!’ She hadn’t planned on saying that, it just came out. ‘This is my baby, and I would like my confidentiality respected!’
‘It is respected. And, as I told Richard when I made you the appointment today, it’s my baby, too.’
‘Don’t do this, Alexi!’ Her voice trembled.
‘Do what?’ For a moment his eyes flicked over her, taking in the tumble of curls around her shoulders. She looked pale and fragile but utterly beautiful.
‘Try to take me over.’ She glared at him.
‘Take you over …’ He repeated the words and for a moment looked amused.
‘I know you, Alexi,’ she reminded him. ‘I know what a shrewd operator you are. You’re treating this situation as if it is some business plan that you are in charge of. Well, it’s not! I’m in charge of this.’
The amusement suddenly died in his eyes. ‘I told you earlier, Katie, I won’t be sidelined—this is my child. I’m involved whether you like it or not … and I want this baby.’
‘You want the baby?’ She stared at him in surprise.
‘Yes.’
She continued just to look up at him with startled suspicion. ‘You really want the baby?’
‘Yes. I just said so.’
‘Mr Commitment-Phobic? Mr “I only want casual relationships” wants to take on the biggest responsibility there is in life … a baby?’
‘Don’t be facetious, Katie, it doesn’t suit you.’
‘Well, come on, Alexi, you’ve got to admit it is a bit of a leap for you, isn’t it?’
He shrugged. ‘But every journey in life has to start with a single step, doesn’t it?’ He looked into her eyes. ‘We’ve taken that step—there’s no going back.’
She felt a warm feeling of relief start to wind its way through her body. She’d hardly dared hope that he would say something like that to her, and that this was going to be OK.
‘I want this baby, too.’ She whispered the words, her voice unsteady as emotion shivered through her. ‘So much it hurts.’
‘So we are in agreement.’ He said the words gently, and for a moment his eyes held with hers. ‘I’m glad, Katie. It simplifies everything. A baby needs the security of a mother and a father.’
She could drown in his eyes, she thought hazily. Her gaze moved to the gleam of satisfaction on his sensual lips.
‘So we’ll get married,’ he told her softly.
‘What did you just say?’ For a moment she thought she had misheard him.
‘We’ll get married,’ he told her again, his tone supremely confident. ‘As soon as I can arrange it.’
For a few startled moments her mind played with the proposal. ‘But we don’t love each other,’ she whispered.
‘Does that really matter?’ He held her gaze seriously. ‘That emotion only complicates things anyway.’
She was jolted back to reality with an abruptness that made her blink. ‘Of course it matters!’
‘Katie, giving our child a secure upbringing is what matters! Think about it, you can’t possibly manage on your own. For a start you live in a tiny first-floor apartment—totally unsuitable.’
‘I’ll manage perfectly well!’ She glared at him.
He shook his head. ‘Anyway, you don’t have to. You are expecting my heir; obviously I’m going to look after you.’
‘By taking over my life.’ Something hardened inside Katie.
‘By doing the right thing.’
‘Well, I don’t want you to do the right thing!’ For some strange reason she wanted to cry. ‘And if that is your idea of a proposal you can keep it.’
He fixed her with a piercing look. ‘It’s my idea of a solution,’ he said calmly.
‘Well, I don’t like it.’
‘So what do you suggest, then?’ He looked at her with a raised eyebrow. ‘Do you think it would be better if I wait until the child is born and then take you forcibly to court because I want custody?’
‘You wouldn’t do that!’ Her breath seemed to freeze in her throat.
‘Katie, I’ll do whatever it takes,’ he told her powerfully. ‘And, believe me, you don’t want to be on the wrong side of me. Because I have the money and resources to go all the way, and I will win.’
‘A judge wouldn’t give you custody!’ Her voice wasn’t quite steady now. ‘No right-minded person would take a baby from its mother!’
‘Let’s see … take a baby from a one-parent family and transport it into the loving network of one of the richest, most powerful dynasties in Europe?’
She swallowed hard. The feeling of initial relief that he wanted his child had now turned to a feeling of complete fear. ‘I can’t believe you are saying these things! That you could even contemplate for a moment forcibly removing a child from its mother—it’s barbaric!’
‘I wasn’t contemplating it,’ he told her calmly. ‘I’m hoping you will see sense and it won’t come to that.’
See sense! The words sizzled through her. He was offering her marriage like he was offering a deal in the boardroom.
‘You may have more money than me, but that doesn’t make up for love, Alexi! A judge would look at both sides of the equation.’
‘You think my child won’t be loved?’ He looked at her with a quizzical expression. ‘You must think very little of me if you believe that. OK, you and I are not in love, but that doesn’t mean I’m incapable of loving! And I want the best for my child, and that includes a mother—a loving family-unit.’
The words made her emotions swirl in confusion.
‘You are a part of that, Katie … I want you in my life.’
But he didn’t really want her—not in the way a man usually meant when he suggested marriage. ‘You want me as some kind of convenient baby-minder, you mean!’ she told him bitterly.
‘No, I want you as my wife … in my bed.’ He came closer and reached out a hand to stroke it lightly down over the side of her face. It was a gentle, almost tender caress and it made her emotions ache with the need to turn towards him, lift her face for his kiss.
‘A marriage without love would never work.’ She tried to keep focussed on reality.
For a moment anger swirled inside Alexi. He couldn’t believe that she was trying to turn him down! He hadn’t been able to think about anything else this afternoon—and the more he thought about it, the more sense this made. In fact, he couldn’t believe the ache inside him—the passionate intensity with which he now knew he wanted her. Because of the child, of course—not because of the desire she stirred in him. He could click his fingers and have a harem of women if he wanted. He didn’t need her. But, by God, he was going to have her!
‘We may not be head over heels in love, but we are compatible, Katie,’ he told her, his tone forceful. ‘Especially in the bedroom.’
For a moment his eyes rested on her lips, and she felt herself tremble inside as she remembered what had happened between them only this morning. He was right—she had never wanted anyone the way she wanted him. Whatever emotion lay between them, it was powerfully compelling.
‘I only have to touch you and you want me,’ he murmured.
She shook her head, trying to fight against the whispering voices inside that were telling her he was right. ‘You are the most arrogant man I have ever met!’ she told him fiercely instead.
‘You said that this morning, before you kissed me.’ He smiled and watched how her skin flared with uncomfortable heat.
‘I am a truthful man, Katie.’ He stroked his hand down over her face, tipping her chin upwards so that she was forced to look at him. He watched the shadows flicking through the beauty of her blue eyes, watched as her lips parted involuntarily. ‘I can feel the heat of your desire when I touch you. I can taste it when I kiss you …’
He came closer and, before she could break away, his lips captured hers, his hand holding her still and compliant. She felt a surge of longing so deep that it shook her to the core.
Intuitively she opened her mouth for him and kissed him back. She moved a little closer, her heart thundering against her ribs so heavily, so loudly, it drowned out the warning voices inside her head. All she knew was that she wanted him so much, wanted him to touch her intimately, make love to her … take away this craving need for him.
He was the one to break the spell and pull away. ‘You see?’ He smiled down at her.
His arrogant confidence seared through her. She didn’t know who she was more furious with, him, or herself for instantly responding with such heat. ‘I don’t see anything.’ She tried to shrug the feelings away.
‘You need more proof?’ he asked lazily. ‘Shall we try it again?’
‘No! Stop it, Alexi!’ Her voice broke on a small cry of panic, and he laughed.
‘You see, it will work between us! So why risk everything by going it alone?’
His flippant attitude hurt. ‘It wouldn’t be a risk. Not if you were a reasonable person!’
‘I am being reasonable, Katie. I’m offering you marriage. I don’t want our child torn apart by a court, by feuding parents! I want him to have the same secure upbringing that I enjoyed as a child in Greece.’
‘You’d take him out of the country?’ She looked at him in horror.
‘Of course. His heritage is Greek, and I have a large family-network. He would be secure within that network.’
‘And just say the baby is a girl?’ she snapped. ‘You might not be so interested then.’
‘The sex of the child is unimportant to me! You think a girl doesn’t need a father?’
The question splintered through her. She knew a girl needed a father; she knew a child needed a secure family no matter what their gender. She knew from personal experience how important it was to feel part of a family, to feel secure and safe.
‘So what is it to be, Katie? Are you going to accede to my wishes and put our child first, or is this going to develop into a battle for custody?’ he asked.
She shrugged, but her eyes flashed fire at him as she tried to pretend that he wasn’t scaring her, and that she was in control of this. ‘I’ll think about it.’
He looked at her with a flicker of admiration. ‘We’ll make a good team,’ he reflected.
‘I only said I’d think about it!’ she reminded him angrily.
He smiled. ‘You can give me your answer tonight at the party.’
‘No, Alexi, I won’t be rushed!’
‘And I won’t be kept waiting. Once I have made up my mind about something, I am not a patient man.’
There was a knock on the outer cabin-door.
‘That’s probably the boutique with the selection of cocktail dresses I told them to bring down for you.’ Alexi glanced at his watch. ‘I’ll let them in on my way out. And I’ll see you up on deck later for your answer, say about six-thirty, before the party gets into full swing.’
She watched helplessly as he walked away. She had once heard it said that Alexander Demetri always got what he wanted—but she’d thought that the reference was mostly concerned with his business life. She’d seen his steely determination on many occasions in boardroom meetings, had often felt sorry for anyone who stood in the way of his objectives. However she had never glimpsed his ruthless determination on a personal basis. Not, that was, until today. And it was a formidable experience. If he took her to court, he would probably win!