Читать книгу The Son He Never Knew - KRISTI GOLD - Страница 10

SEATED AT THE SMALL DINING TABLE, Chase glanced up from the mug of coffee when he heard the sound of footsteps. Jess approached him slowly, and considering the way her shoulders sagged, the fatigue in her eyes, she looked liked she’d been ambushed.

He shoved the chair across from him with his boot. “Sit before you drop in your tracks.”

After she slid onto the seat, Jess crossed her arms around her middle like she was cold. He’d made a point to turn up the heat soon after they’d walked in the door even though he’d felt like his skin had caught fire.

Chase lifted his mug. “Want a cup?”

“No, thank you.” She eyed his gun resting on the table where he’d unloaded it a few moments before.

He hooked a thumb over his shoulder toward the guest room. “How’s he doing?”

“As well as can be expected, I guess. He’s not saying much but I’m sure he’s still in shock. I know I am.”

Chase really wanted to ask Jess how Dalton’s injuries had come about. She could either clear things up, or incriminate herself. He wasn’t willing to take that chance because he’d be damned if he’d speak one word against her.

“You look like you could use some sleep,” he said when she yawned.

Jess folded her hands together and rested them on top of the pine table. “I’m not sure I could sleep if I wanted to. Every time I close my eyes, I see these awful images.”

Chase could seriously relate to that scenario. He couldn’t remember a time in the past few years when he drifted peacefully off to sleep. Couldn’t remember the last time he had any real peace.

“If you decide to try and rest, you can take my room. I’ll sleep on the couch.”

She brought her attention back to him. “I’m not going to put you out of your bed. I’ll sleep on the sofa.”

No point in arguing with Jess. He’d learned that a long time ago. But he’d also learned how to skirt her objections. “You sure you don’t want some coffee? Maybe a beer? I’m fresh out of whiskey but I could sneak into the main house and see if Dad still has that seventy-year-old-bottle that belonged to my great-grandpa.”

Jess shuddered. “I can’t even stand the smell of whiskey, much less drink it. I have Dalton to thank for that.”

“He always did like his booze.” And women. Chase had heard from friends that the demon had been scouring the bars and cheating on Jess for years.

When Jess continued to stare blankly across the room, Chase scraped his mind for some way to lift her spirits as much as possible. “Do you want to call your folks?”

Her gaze snapped to his. “No. They just left two days ago on a cruise with Gary, Becca and the kids for the holidays. I don’t see any reason to bother them while they’re on their first real vacation in years.”

Chase could think of one reason—giving her family advance notice in case Jess wound up in jail. “Fine. Is there anyone else I can call for you?”

She drummed her fingertips on the table, a purely nervous gesture. “Yes. I need you to call the hospital and find out how Dalton’s doing.”

He’d like to think she wanted to know because of Danny, but he wondered if there might be more to it. Either she still cared for the jerk, or she felt responsible for his wounds. Maybe both. “I could call but I won’t get anywhere. The hospital won’t release any information unless you’re a family member or the family gives permission. I doubt that holds true for either of us.”

She rubbed her temples like she had one hell of a headache. “You’re right. I’d just hate to read about it in the paper if something happens to him.”

More than likely the event would be front page news no matter what the outcome. “I have Rachel’s cell number. I can try to reach her.”

Jess didn’t look too keen on that idea. “I wouldn’t want to disturb her.”

He fished the phone from his pocket and hit the speed dial. “She’s probably on her way to Jackson, if she’d not already there.”

After two rings, Rachel answered with a harried “Hello.”

“Hey, Rachel, it’s Chase. Are you at the hospital?”

“Yes. How did you know?”

At least she didn’t sound too distraught, a good thing. “I answered the call.”

“Of course you did. I keep forgetting you’re a deputy now.”

Sometimes Chase wished he wasn’t. Tonight happened to be one of those times. “How’s your brother doing?” He tried to sound concerned but his tone was noticeably dry.

“He’s undergoing tests right now and he’s still unconscious,” Rachel said. “Do you have any idea what happened?”

He had a few, but none he cared to share. “Jess says it was an accident, but that’s all I know.”

“Where is Jess now? I tried to call the home number and her cell but I didn’t get any answer.”

“She’s here with me. Do you want to speak with her?”

“I’d like that. I’m worried about her.”

Jess waved him away when he tried to hand her the phone. “Just talk to her for a minute,” he said. “She’s one of your best friends and she’s concerned.”

After a brief hesitation, Jess reluctantly took the cell and murmured a soft “Hello.”

Chase waited and watched while Jess spoke with Rachel. She sounded meek, very un-Jess-like, but he could understand why she might. While he put away his gun in the locked cabinet in the corner, he listened as Jess repeated the accident scenario without any details. And after a few brief questions about Dalton’s condition, she ended the conversation.

“At least he’s still alive,” she said as she handed him back the phone.

He could tell she found little relief in Dalton’s status. “If he makes it through the night, he’ll probably be okay.”

“And if that’s not the case?” she asked. “What happens then?”

Nothing good. He leaned back against the counter and crossed his arms. “Let’s just worry about that if and when the time comes. Right now you need some sleep.”

“I’ve already told you I can’t sleep.” Her irritable tone said otherwise.

“You can try.” He pushed away from the cabinet and returned to the table. “I’ll show you to my room.”

“I told you I’ll sleep on the couch.”

“You’ll be closer to Danny if you’re in my room.”

That seemed to get her attention. “I guess that would probably be better.”

Jess took her time coming to her feet while he picked up her bag from the floor in the den. She slowly and silently followed behind him as he made his way down the hall and paused outside the guestroom.

“Do you think I can hear Danny if he calls me?” she asked.

“You’ll be right next door,” he said as he pointed out his bedroom.

After a slight hesitation, she entered the area and looked around before her gaze settled on the king-size bed.

He nodded toward the closed door to his right. “The bathroom’s through there. After you’re done, I need to take a quick shower.”

She took the bag from him and clutched it like a life-line. “Is this the only bathroom?”

“The only one with a shower,” he said. “There’s a half-bath next to the laundry room. I’ve just started framing out two more bedrooms and another bath at the back of the house.”

“Why?” she asked, catching him off guard.

“Why not?” he answered back.

“I don’t see why you’d need four bedrooms unless you plan on having a family,” she said. “And since you’re not a settling down kind of guy, well…”

Exactly what he’d told her all those years ago. “Extra bedrooms add to resale value.”

“Are you going to move after you’re finished with the renovations?” Her tone held an edge of alarm, like she worried he might desert her.

“I hadn’t planned on it, but it doesn’t hurt to prepare for the future.”

She lowered her eyes. “Sometimes you can’t prepare for what life throws your way.”

He hated she couldn’t look at him straight on, that she’d obviously lost her confidence, unlike the girl he used to know. But then her bastard of an ex-husband had played a huge role in that.

“We all make errors in judgment, Jess.” He’d made more than his fair share, one that had been particularly serious. Two if he counted what had happened in her dorm room a decade ago.

She took a few steps back and pointed behind her. “I’m going to wash up now.”

“Fine. I’ll be right here.”

“I won’t be long,” she said as she turned, hurried into the bath and closed the door behind her.

Chase sat on the edge of the bed and streaked both hands over his face. He should be dog-tired, but he wasn’t. He should be convinced of Jess’s innocence, but he had his doubts. He should disregard duty and demand the truth, but he couldn’t…and not only because of job.

The truth could very well be more than he could handle.

AFTER CHECKING ON DANNY one more time, Jess climbed into the king-size bed, pulled the sheets up to her chin and surveyed the area cast in overhead light. The room had been painted neutral beige and the accessories were patently masculine, from the leather chair in the corner to the heavy pine furniture. Funny, this place had barely been four rickety walls and rough-hewn wood floors when they used to play here as kids. She smiled as she recalled their childhood games and her ongoing argument with Chase—she refused to play damsel-in-distress to his superhero just because she was a girl. Over and over she’d insisted she was quite capable of using her pretend powers to save him. But with a flash of his dimples and a few well-chosen words, he’d won the battle.

These days, he rarely smiled. These days, she had barely been able to save herself. Especially tonight.

As Jess settled deeper into the feather pillow, she absorbed the fresh, clean scent of cotton and a hint of Chase’s favorite soap. She allowed the memories to take her back to a better time when she’d given him some fancy, manly shower gel one Christmas—which he’d promptly given back and said, “No offense, but no, thanks.” She’d known all along he’d been a bar soap kind of guy but she’d reasoned that he could change. She should have known better.

People didn’t change, at least not for the better. She’d learned that hard lesson from her ex-husband.

In response to a sudden, strong chill, Jess chafed her arms with her palms and felt the tender spot right above her elbow. She shuddered at the sudden surge of recent recollections. Horrible recollections of what had transpired only a few hours before.

The sound of the opening door startled Jess and thankfully thrust her back into the here and now. Chase came out of the bathroom wearing a pair of navy pajama bottoms and a seen-better-days gray T-shirt.

As she scooted up against the headboard, he headed to the closet, where he placed his boots beneath the neat row of jeans and shirts hanging on the rack.

“Nice place,” she said, grasping for a topic other than why she had landed in his house.

“It’s fairly simple.”

“You have a whirlpool tub and granite countertops, Chase. I don’t think that qualifies as simple.”

He tossed a glance over his shoulder. “I had some help decorating.”

Jess imagined he did. Female help, and she doubted his mom had contributed. Missy Reed was as country as country came. “I’m sure the county girls stood in line to help you out.”

“Just Savannah,” he said as he pulled out a khaki uniform shirt and hung it on a wall hook next to the closet. “She and Sam are redoing the farmhouse so she volunteered.”

She experienced a little bite of guilt over jumping to conclusions. But considering Chase’s legendary ladies-man reputation, who could blame her? “That was nice of her to help. I’m sorry to say I haven’t seen much of her since she moved back from Chicago.” She hadn’t seen much of anyone for that matter.

Chase pulled some bedding from the top of the closet, closed the door and finally faced her. “You might want to give her a call when she’s back in town.”

Jess immediately understood the motive behind his suggestion. “Do you think I need an attorney?”

“I don’t know, but it couldn’t hurt.”

A rock of nausea settled in Jess’s belly. “I’ll wait and see what happens tomorrow.” If Dalton didn’t survive, she’d definitely make that call. Or if the statement didn’t go well, she might then, too.

Chase returned to the bathroom and only partially closed the door, allowing enough light to escape to keep the room from total darkness. Jess wasn’t the least bit surprised by the gesture. He’d always been considerate and thoughtful, at least when it came to her needs.

“It’s late,” he said as he crossed the room. “Let me know if you need anything.”

“I do need something,” she blurted, driven by an overwhelming blast of anxiety.

He paused with his hand poised on the light switch and faced her again. “Ask away.”

“I need you to stay with me tonight.”

His gaze slid away. “Not a good idea.”

She knew the root of his concerns—what happened the last time they’d been in bed together ten years ago. “I’m not going to touch you or ask anything more of you than your company. I just don’t want to be alone tonight. I promise I’ll stay on my side of the bed. And it’s a big bed—”

“I tend to toss and turn these days. You probably won’t get any sleep at all.”

“We’ll be restless together.” Jess despised the desperation in her voice, but then she was desperate. Desperate not to be left alone with her horrible memories. “Please, Chase. Only for a while.” The same plea from their past.

He released a sigh. “Okay.”

While Jess silently celebrated her minor victory, Chase replaced the bedding in the closet and closed the door. After he turned off the light, he sat on the edge of the mattress and kept his back to her, motionless as if preparing to join her. Or reconsidering.

Jess recalled the last time he’d done that very thing—right after he’d told her they’d made a huge mistake sleeping together and it would never happen again. Since then, nothing had been quite the same.

They’d exchanged letters often during his time away, but not once had they ever talked about that one memorable night. Not once had she asked him if he’d regretted it, because in reality, she hadn’t. She only regretted that she’d disregarded his advice and jumped into a marriage that was doomed from the beginning. At the time, she felt she’d had no choice.

A few minutes passed before he slid onto his back, his hands laced together atop his abdomen, his body as rigid as a steel beam.

“Thank you,” Jess said. “For everything. I don’t know what I would’ve done if you hadn’t been there to help me. I appreciate it more than you know.”

“No problem.”

The razor-sharp edge in his tone told Jess everything she’d asked of him was a problem, and suspected he had more on his mind than he’d let on. She should probably drop it, but some soul-deep need to clear the air drove her to turn on the bedside lamp and gain his complete attention. “Go ahead, Chase, say it.”

“Say what?” he muttered as he flipped onto his belly, his face turned toward the opposite wall.

She rolled to her side toward him. “Tell me I’m a fool again just like you did after I told you I’d married Dalton.”

He turned his head and stared at her straight on. “I never said you were a fool. I said Dalton had you fooled.”

“You’re right, but I can’t take back my mistakes.” Oh, that she could. “But I do want to make it right between you and me. We’ve never discussed that night in my dorm—”

“Not now, Jess.”

She rose up on one elbow and supported her jaw with her palm. “When Chase? We’ve skirted that topic for ten years and—”

“I said not now.” He turned his head again, making it all too clear that he was done with the conversation. Maybe even done with her.

Feeling weary and emotionally drained, Jess turned off the light and rolled away from Chase. Years ago, he would have held her close and reassured her. He would have been more than willing to provide a leaning shoulder. A swell of sadness overcame her as she silently mourned the loss of her best friend. She chastised herself for all the ways in which she’d ruined her life. Perhaps even her son’s life.

Worse still, she might find herself without a job. The good citizens of Placid could be judgmental, and if any parent in town even suspected she’d intentionally harmed her ex-husband, they’d kick her to the curb without a second thought. Not to mention, her former father-in-law served on the school board. No job meant no way to support her child other than the money Dalton grudgingly gave her.

Everything seemed so hopeless and that only fed her remorse.

As the tears began to fall, she buried her face in the pillow, tried hard not to let Chase know that she was an emotional wreck. And just when she’d begun to honestly believe they would never be able to repair their relationship, she felt the mattress bend and Chase’s strong hand engulfing hers.

“You’re going to be okay,” he whispered. “Danny’s going to be okay, too.”

Jess couldn’t respond but she didn’t need to. And although he only held her hand for a few moments, it seemed enough to get her through, at least tonight. Tomorrow would be another story.

THE SHRILL BUZZER JARRED JESS out of sleep and her eyes snapped open. Confused, she took a few moments to survey the room in order to acclimate to the surroundings. As she finally recalled exactly where she was, and why, she resisted the urge to pull the covers back over her head and hide away from the world. She reached out and felt the space beside her only to discover that Chase had apparently left the bed before the annoying alarm sounded. How he could be up so early was beyond her. He’d thrashed about most of the night, taking the blanket with him and rousing her from sleep that had come in fits and starts. During those awake times, she’d checked on Danny twice and with great relief, had found him soundly sleeping. If only she could say the same for herself.

Recognizing what awaited her in a matter of hours—a trip to the sheriff’s department to present her written statement—Jess decided to get up and get it over with as quickly as possible. She climbed from the bed, grabbed a robe and slipped it on as she made her way to the guestroom to tell Danny good morning. When she came upon only an empty bed, a swell of dread weighted her chest and robbed her breath.

Panic sent her on a fast clip into the kitchen where she thankfully found the missing deputy and her son. They sat at the breakfast table, both bent over a bowl of cereal—the kind with the fruity marshmallows that made her queasy just thinking about them. Neither seemed to notice her presence as she watched the pair for a few more minutes. She’d envisioned this scene many times throughout the years—her one-time best friend and her precious boy getting to know each other. Yet the picture-perfect scene was only an illusion. Her entire life to this point had been an illusion, and that wouldn’t end today.

Jess approached her son from behind and ruffled his tousled blond hair. “Time for you to get a trim, Danny.”

He didn’t bother to look up from the bowl or offer a response. She sent Chase a forlorn look before checking the clock on the wall. “What time are we supposed to do this?”

He took a drink of coffee before pushing the cup aside. “I figure in an hour or so we’ll head down to the department for the interviews.”

“Interviews” meaning both she and her child. Not if she could help it.

Jess touched Danny’s shoulder to garner his attention. “Why don’t you go wash up and get dressed?”

He sent her only a fast glance before scooting back from the table and carrying his empty bowl to the sink. Funny, she usually had to ride him to clean up after meals. Then again, he didn’t seem at all himself, and rightfully so.

Once Danny had left the area, Jess poured a cup of coffee from the pot on the counter and claimed the chair that her son had just left. “Did he say anything at all to you?”

Chase shook his head. “Not a word. I found him sitting in here staring off into space when I got up about an hour ago.”

She closed her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose with her fingertips. “I pray he’ll come around in a few days.”

“I think that depends on what he saw last night.”

The long pause told Jess he wanted her to fill in the blanks despite his warning last night to keep her confessions to herself. “I don’t think he saw anything except that Dalton had been injured.” Lie number one. “That’s why I don’t see any reason for Danny to have to endure a lot of questions that will only upset him.”

Chase inclined his head and fixed his gaze on Jess, causing her to look away. “Are you sure he didn’t see it happen?”

“As sure as I can be.” Lie number two.

“That might explain his silence,” Chase said.

“As I told you last night, it was an accident. Dalton came to pick up Danny three hours late, he’d been drinking, and when I refused to let him take Danny, he grabbed my arm and I yanked it away. I guess he lost his balance but I’m not sure. It’s all a blur.”

Lie number three. She remembered every last detail, sickening sights and sounds included. She recalled Dalton’s insistence they get back together, her refusal, his threats to take her son away from her permanently if she didn’t do his bidding. His accusations. And then…

Feeling the need to escape, Jess downed the rest of her coffee and stood. “I’m going to get dressed now, unless you want to go first.”

He leaned back in the chair and made a sweeping gesture toward the hall. “You go ahead.”

“Okay. And after I’ve finished making my statement, I need to get my car and a few things from the house.”

“I’ll have to escort you until Buck clears the place as a possible crime scene.”

Great. Nothing like being considered a hardened criminal. But then she had been guilty of more than her fair share of crimes, the first entailed marrying the wrong man. The second—not leaving him years ago. “Fine, but I want to find a place to rent today if at all possible. If I do, I’ll need more than a duffle bag and one change of clothes.”

“You’re welcome to stay here as long as you like,” he said without much conviction. “Once Dalton verifies your account of the events, you’ll be free to move back into your house.”

“It’s not my house,” she answered with more force than necessary. “Dalton made all the decisions when we had it built so I never considered it mine. During the divorce, he agreed to sell it and split the proceeds but unfortunately, people around here can’t afford it. And Dalton’s too damn stubborn to just buy out my half so he can move back in.”

“He still wants to control you,” Chase said, his tone etched with anger.

“You’re right, but I refuse to let him control me anymore.” Easier said than done. Even lying in a hospital bed, he was still controlling her life. If heaven forbid he died, that control still wouldn’t end. “Do you happen to know of any place I can rent? Since we’re on the holiday break, I’d have time to get settled before school resumes after the first of the year.”

He released a cynical laugh. “Most of the rentals around here are owned by your father-in-law.”

Jess hadn’t stopped to consider that. “Surely there’s some property available somewhere that Edwin doesn’t have his hands on.”

Chase kicked back in his chair and stretched his arms above his head. “I’ll ask around. In the meantime, you can stay here.”

She didn’t see that as a viable option, especially after his obvious discomfort last night. “Thanks for the offer, but I can always go to the motel if I have to.”

Chase shrugged. “Suit yourself, but you’re pride isn’t going to benefit you or your son. Forcing him to live in a rat-hole motel won’t help matters.”

As usual, he was right, but that didn’t make living in his house more appealing. “I’ll just wait and see what happens today.”

She had one more question to ask him, one she’d been purposely avoiding to this point. “Have you heard anything on Dalton’s condition?”

“I called Rachel a little while ago. He’s still in ICU but he’s stable.”

Jess experienced some measure of relief that she wouldn’t be facing a murder charge—yet. “Then, he’s going to be okay?”

“Looks like it. He’s also awake.”

Her relief dissolved into dread. “Did he say anything about last night?”

“He said he doesn’t remember what happened. But that could only be temporary. They won’t know for a few days.”

“I’m glad his condition has improved,” she added without a shred of sincerity.

Chase studied her as if he could see right through her deception. “I guess it probably is a good thing. Unless it’s going to cause more problems for you in the long run.”

Somehow Chase knew she was withholding information, but he could never know what really happened last night. No one would know if she could help it. Jess could only hope that Dalton’s memory loss was permanent, saving both her and her son. If not, she’d deal with the fallout later. Right now she had to move on to the matter at hand.

“I’m going to check on Danny and then dress.” As she started toward the bedroom, Chase called her name. She faced him and attempted a smile that fell short. “Yes?”

His gaze didn’t waver from hers. “When you give your statement, don’t forget all the misery Dalton’s caused you and Danny. Consider what’s best for you and not what’s right.”

Comprehension dawned slowly before Jess realized Chase had been telling her to cover her tracks. To do what she had to do to skirt any legal issues. Basically, to lie.

Without offering a response, Jess left the kitchen to seek out her child. She discovered the guestroom door partially ajar and pushed it open to find Danny seated on the edge of the bed, tying his sneakers. He glanced up at her with that same vacant look in his eyes, sending a pang of regret coursing through her soul.

She took a seat beside him, draped her arm around his thin shoulders and locked into his gaze. “Danny, when we get to the station, Sheriff Reed’s going to ask you some questions.”

A flicker of fear called out from his brown eyes, yet he didn’t respond, leading Jess to continue. “It was an accident. That’s all you have to say. Or you don’t have to say anything at all. In fact, it might be better if you didn’t say anything.”

When fear turned into confusion in Danny’s expression, Jess felt as if she was falling into a black hole of deceit and dragging her son down with her. Still, she saw no way around asking him to lie, if only by omission.

She tipped her head against his and whispered, “I promise you I’m going to take care of this. Nothing bad’s going to happen if you’ll trust me, sweetie.”

He looked as if he didn’t quite believe her, but he did nod his head in acknowledgment.

Jess kissed his forehead and came to her feet. “Try not to worry, Danny. It will all be over soon.”

If only she sincerely believed that. If only she could convince her child of that when she wasn’t convinced herself.

For the time being, Jess decided to follow Chase’s advice and only disclose what she needed to get by, skirting the truth and in turn, shattering everything she’d been taught during her childhood. Everything she’d taught her only child about honesty.

Even if she continued her cover-up, she ran the risk that eventually her secrets would be revealed. Two very important secrets. The first she’d kept for over ten years, the second less than twenty-four-hours. Both were closely intertwined. That ten-year-old secret could drive an irreparable wedge between her and Chase as well as complicate her current problems.

But the second could cost her everything…including her son.