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chapter 12

For Whom the Bell Tolls

OHSU Library (High atop Pill Hill)

October 2004

Julian was restless. It was a fairly warm autumn night in Portland, and he had accompanied Ryan to the OHSU medical library. Ryan, as usual, was totally immersed in his studies, and was hot on the trail of some new research on vitamin D that he was convinced would lead a monumental advance in preventive health care. Julian admired his intensity, focus, and boundless energy, while secretly wishing for some of that for himself. Whereas Ryan always seemed to know precisely where he was headed, Julian really didn’t have a clue. His first two years at PSU had been spent largely nibbling at this and that, trying to decide what his interests really were and what he might do as a vocation. He was technically a sociology major, but he was pretty sure that wasn’t going to stick. In fact, he had been looking for something of greater interest to him for the past couple of semesters, albeit in a rather-haphazard fashion. As the fall approached, he was determined to make some progress in honing his academic interests, rather than just spinning his wheels and wondering what direction to take.

The band hadn’t materialized either, much to Julian’s dismay. He loved writing music and playing both acoustic and bass guitar. He reckoned himself to be a pretty fair vocalist as well, but as usual, Ryan seemed to be the mover and shaker where any public performance was concerned. Anyway, Julian had written a few more songs in the past year, improved his guitar skills considerably, and now did a few solo gigs around town in bars and coffeehouses. He missed Ryan’s energy, however, and somehow doubted that he would ever amount to much on his own.

As he sat there in his cubicle, contemplating life in general and his future in particular, out of the corner of his eye Julian noticed a figure staggering out of the periodical stacks, carrying a small mountain of bound and unbound periodicals that was so tall it had actually obscured his vision. “Jules,” the voice whispered in desperation, “help me out here, man!”

Laughing to himself, Julian could readily see that Ryan’s curiosity had once again gotten the best of him. “Couldn’t be satisfied with just a couple of articles at a time, could you, big guy?” he taunted his friend before coming to his rescue. As Julian removed the top foot or so of journals, Ryan breathed a sigh of relief as the remainder of the stack came crashing down on the adjoining desk.

“Jules, this is unbelievable!” he gasped, collapsing into the chair.

“This vitamin D stuff is amazing…I’ll bet you that, with just the research in this stack alone, we could reduce the amount of chronic disease on this planet by 50%! I just can’t believe more people don’t know about this,” he continued, still trying to catch his breath. “And,” he added with noticeable exasperation, “the problem is getting worse, not better! Do you know that vitamin D isn’t technically even a vitamin at all? It’s a prohormone, Jules! Do you know what that means?”

Julian readily confessed that he didn’t, but felt certain that Ryan was about to reveal the answer posthaste.

“It means…” Ryan paused, as if to ensure Julian’s curiosity and complete attention before delivering a monumental insight… “It means, Jules, that it’s way more involved in biochemical pathways and genetic regulation than we ever imagined! Vitamin D receptors are found everywhere throughout the body, and control literally hundreds of genes! It is way more important than just an enhancer of calcium absorption. It affects almost every aspect of our body’s functioning—all the way from bone formation to immune regulation, to cell differentiation, to energy metabolism, to vascular integrity—the list goes on and on. Wanna know the worst part, Jules? I’ll tell you—nobody is getting it! You know why? I’ll tell you that too! It’s cheap and can’t be patented! If this were a drug that did only 1/1,000 of what vitamin D can do, it would be all over the TV, newspapers, magazines, etc., because some big drug company would be making billions in the process! Nobody knows about its benefits because this research isn’t financially beneficial to any big corporation. Kind of makes you sick, doesn’t it? Millions of people dying needlessly because no big company can find a way to exploit this research for its own gains. Welcome to ‘disease care’ in America, Jules!”

Ryan went on, almost in a frenzy now. “Sunlight! Simple, free, sunlight! That’s it—nobody is getting enough sun! Do you know that all this big cancer scare perpetrated by doctors and sunscreen makers actually LOWERS people’s vitamin D production by almost 100%? Yeah, listen to this,” Ryan exhorted, brandishing some sort of research article wildly in the air. “Age-standardized mean serum 25(OH)D concentrations based on observed values were SIGNIFICANTLY LOWER in 2000–2004 than in 1988–1994 in ALL GROUPS EXAMINED.”1

“Do you get what that means, Jules? We have a simple hormone, free from sunlight, or at worst, a few pennies in supplement form, that can reduce chronic diseases astronomically, and peoples’ serum levels are actually going DOWN, not up, due to a bunch of bogus information and lack of education! And it even gets worse! All this obesity that we’re seeing in our country, and now worldwide, causes vitamin D levels to drop even lower! I don’t know about you, but I’ve gotta do something about this. When I get out of here, I’ve gotta go to medical school or something like that. The world is literally dying for lack of a spokesperson who can’t be bought off by Big Pharma. I’m the man, Jules, I’m the man,” Ryan repeated emphatically as he sank into the chair next to Julian.

Yes, you probably are the man, Julian thought to himself. If anyone could literally take on the whole world, it would be Ryan Christie—a multitalented human being whose energy and curiosity knew no bounds. “Go get ’em, bro,” Julian urged his friend, who was now already deep into his pile of journals. Again, Julian had to envy him. If only he could find some sort of focal point in his own life, and maybe tap into just a little of Ryan’s energy…umm, wouldn’t that be sweet? Oh well, he mused, I guess it’ll just happen when it happens! With that thought, he unzipped his backpack and pulled out a book that had tweaked his interest while he was in the PSU bookstore several days ago.

*****

Julian was halfway through Peter Russell’s “From Science to God: A Physicist’s Journey into the Mystery of Consciousness” before he even realized that several hours had passed. He glanced over at Ryan, who now had journals stacked several feet tall all around his desk, and was busily delving into yet another one. For once, he had been almost as oblivious to space and time as Ryan was. Julian was a big fan of Eckhart Tolle, having devoured and thoroughly assimilated “The Power of Now,” so Tolle’s assessment of Russell’s book as “a vitally important contribution to the awakening of human consciousness,” printed boldly on the book’s cover, had certainly aroused his curiosity. It was an easy read, and now several hours into it, Julian felt an unusual excitement beginning to creep over him.

Julian and Ryan had been raised in the conservative Southern Baptist denomination, having literally grown up just around the corner from the First Baptist Church on Church Street in downtown Charleston. By the time they were seniors, however, although they still attended church there with their parents and enjoyed the social networking and holiday traditions, both boys found many of the sermons to be a bit lacking in intellectual substance for their tastes. Ryan, in particular, found the “exclusivity” commonly practiced by most religions, theirs included, to be rather limited in perspective and altogether unlike his evolving concept of God. His highly scientific nature had caused him to doubt many of the biblical stories they had grown up with, and most certainly the inferences the church had drawn from them. Julian, as usual, was a bit less outspoken, but nevertheless struggled with what he had been taught there, and was always on the lookout for something that made more sense to him.

Russell’s book, written by a scientist who had likewise rejected conventional religion, yet who seemed now to be making his way back toward a broader concept of God, seemed most intriguing. The author’s dilemma—that no matter how much he studied, science never seemed to answer deeper more fundamental questions like, “Where does consciousness come from?” resonated closely with Julian’s own struggle. Russell’s move from the classical sciences to experimental psychology facilitated his newfound interest in the nature of consciousness and led him to seriously question the existing materialistic metaparadigm of the day and to postulate a new theory in which consciousness is fundamental and not derived from the world of space, time, and matter. According to him, whereas there is a physical reality, we never experience it directly—only through our senses and their interpretation in our brain. Add the newer discoveries of quantum physics, and it seems that “reality” is nothing like we imagined it to be, with physical matter, in fact, being 99.999% empty space! In the subatomic world, particles appeared to behave similarly to waves, more like “clouds of potential existence with no definite location.”2

All these new ideas struck Julian like a slap in the face! Imagine that, he thought, the world we actually “know” isn’t the real world at all, just a facsimile created in our minds from our sensory input! And the “real world,” when you get down to the subatomic level, is mostly nothing at all—just energy and potential that consciousness can fashion into whatever it chooses! Space and time are just mental constructs, not fundamental dimensions of underlying reality.

“Wow!” Julian exclaimed, not realizing that he was actually verbalizing his thoughts.

“Wow, what?” Ryan queried, peering above his stack of journals at Julian. “What’s gotten you so excited, Jules?”

“This book is amazing,” Julian whispered, waving Russell’s text in the air. “Ry, science has it all backward—consciousness can never be accounted for from the physical observable world, just the contrary. The physical world emerges from consciousness. Quantum physics is reuniting science and spirituality at last!”

“Hmmm…that sounds like some pretty heavy stuff,” Ryan replied. “I’ll have to leave that to the Russells, though; I’m already up to my ears trying to save mankind from its own colossal biochemical ignorance! Vitamin D for me, Jules, that’s my new mantra. I’m gonna go after these predators who keep suppressing simple, inexpensive natural preventive strategies. Watch out world, here comes RC!”

“Well, I’d say we’re both onto some really big stuff!” Julian smiled. “Ry, just listen to this for thirty seconds,” he pleaded, beginning to read from Peter Russell’s book:

In the past, greater awareness of the true self was deemed important for personal well-being. Today the game has changed; it is now imperative for our collective survival. Our knowledge of the external world has been growing at an accelerating pace, bringing with it an unprecedented ability to modify and manipulate our surroundings. The technologies we now have at our disposal have amplified this potential so much that we can now create almost anything we dream of. Our knowledge of the inner realms, however, has developed much more slowly. We are probably as prone to the failings of a limited sense of self as were people two thousand years ago. This is the source of our problems. Advanced technology may have amplified our capacity to control our environment, but it has also amplified the shortcomings of our partially developed consciousness. Driven by the dictates of a derived identity, and by our belief that inner well-being depends upon external circumstances, we have misused our newfound powers, plundering and poisoning the planet.

“Almost done, Ry, just two more paragraphs. Hang in there, brother, you’ve gotta get this!”

We have reached what Buckminster Fuller called our “final evolutionary exam.” The questions before us are simple: Can we move beyond this limited mode of consciousness? Can we let go or our illusions, discover who we really are, and find the wisdom we so desperately need? These questions face us everywhere we look. Degradation of the environment is forcing us to examine our priorities and values. Political and economic crises reveal the shortcomings of our self-centered thinking. Disillusionment with materialism implores us to ask what it is that we really want. The ever-accelerating pace of change demands that we become less attached to how we think things should be. Many social problems reflect the meaninglessness inherent in the contemporary worldview. And our personal relationships are continually challenging us to move beyond fear and judgment to love without conditions. From all directions the message is, “Wake up!”3

“That really is some powerful writing,” Ryan agreed. “Maybe this is what you’ve been searching for, Jules! Here’s something really big—planet-changing stuff—that you can sink your teeth into. I think you should go for it!”

“I think you’re right, Ry. This could be it for me—the direction I’ve been looking for. Couldn’t be better timing, either. Do you realize that with the internet and all our sophisticated communication systems, we can gain and disseminate information around the planet instantaneously? You and I are lucky to live at a time like this, you know? If we can get our acts together, imagine what kind of influence we can have! People who lived before us were limited pretty much to their own experience and that of their local environment, but no more! We can benefit from and add to people’s knowledge around the world! That in itself is mind-boggling! We can collectively stimulate each other’s awakening. We have to be on the cusp of a quantum leap forward in our evolutionary development. Wow, I’ve gotta get to work!”

“And we’ve gotta get outa here!” Ryan exclaimed. “It’s almost eleven, and this place closes in fifteen minutes. Oh, by the way, I got a call from my mom today.”

“Really? What’s going on with her?”

“You won’t believe this, but she’s getting married!”

“Married? Wow, that IS a shocker! To whom?”

“Oh, some guy named Tom who did a remodeling job on her house when she had to move out to Summerville. You know, after my dad died last year, she just couldn’t keep up the Church Street house anymore. The taxes down there were killing her!”

“Yeah, my parents are always complaining about it too. Getting married, huh? This guy must be pretty special, knowing Cathy!”

“No doubt. I haven’t met him yet, but she seems totally taken by him. Here’s the really big news, though: she wants us to play a tune or two at their wedding next Christmas!”

“Wow! How would we do that? No band since Charleston, and we’re probably a bit rusty, wouldn’t you think?”

“Yeah, we certainly haven’t done much musically since we’ve been out West. It’s not like we haven’t been super busy in school, though,” he added, obviously trying to rationalize his new priorities a bit. “But I was thinking, Jules…maybe we could talk Ben into flying home with us. He’d probably love to visit Charleston, and he seems pretty good, as least from those couple of jams we all did together last fall. We could also probably get Kyle to help us on drums, if he’s still around, that is. We’ve got over a year to figure it out, anyway.”

“Well, sounds like fun, and I like Ben; he was cool the few times we all got together. And by then it’ll be a couple of years since we’ve been home; not since your dad’s funeral last year actually. Christmas too…Charleston’s awesome at Christmas!” Julian grinned. “Hey, they’re flickin’ the lights. Come on, let’s head home—enough of saving the world for one night!”

“I AM going to medical school, though,” Ryan reiterated. “Alternative medicine, I think, however. Remember when we first got here and I told you I walked through NCNM?”

“Vaguely.”

“Well, I liked it then, and I’ll bet I still do. Two more years, and that’s where I’m heading!”

“Maybe you can team up with Ben when he graduates,” Julian suggested as they zipped up their backpacks and headed for the stairs. “The two of you would make a great team. With his mom being a nutritionist, he should be pretty open-minded, at least for an MD,” Julian shrugged.

“Yeah, that’s a good idea, Jules. I’ll have to think about that one. Come on, I’ll race you home!” Ryan yelled over his shoulder as they walked out of the main library doors.

“Damn,” Julian mumbled, “where does that guy get all his energy? It’s almost midnight, for God’s sake!”