Читать книгу Blessing the Curse? - Ksenija Magda - Страница 24

The second hierarchical family model places the man on top of the hierarchy, without transferring any of the power to his wife for raising the children or overseeing the home. In this sanctified curse model, the man insists that he has the God-given authority to control everything. A woman can’t have authority over the children, because that would be a threat to the man’s divine authority. Stripped of all power, even over her children, the woman practically becomes as one of them. This model opens space for incestuous relationships. Since the man has placed his wife and children under his authority as equals, if sex with his wife is unfulfilling (and it cannot be fulfilling, because love cannot be ordered), or if sex is not unavailable (because she is pregnant), he can easily replace his wife with one (or more) of his daughters (or sons).

Biblical texts such as Ephesians 5, Colossians 3, 1 Corinthians 11, and 1 Timothy 2 have been recited to newlyweds to instruct them about the holy hierarchical constitution of Christian marriage. Unfortunately, they have been taken out of context and have never been examined against the central doctrines of the Christian faith, which are encompassed by the biblical messages of salvation, freedom, mutuality, and service. Rather than nurturing a love that seeks to care for the other and give him/her freedom, young people are led to believe that if they force themselves into this God-ordained hierarchy, a mysterious blessing from God will descend upon them. But as the demands of a growing family increase, and they face the challenges of the world, their need for intimacy becomes greater, along with their increasing sense of alienation and isolation. Yet they have been handed over to a sinful hierarchical structure, which will eventually tear them apart.

In the Western world, we see this in the ever-growing divorce rates and the casualties of psychically dismembered kids who have been stripped of their primal trust. If you cannot trust your parents, who can you trust? One-parent families have become an ordeal for many. Regardless of superb social care in places such as Sweden, raising children alone is a difficult task that was never meant for one. Our world is full of isolated individuals who are longing for intimacy and friendship, but unable to form meaningful relationships because they never experienced them in their life.

In parts of the world where there is no social provision for disintegrating families, the pain is even greater, along with its negative impacts on the future. Abandoned women and children roam the streets of cities, trying to find a basic living, a meal a day. They sell their bodies as a last resort, or others exploit them by selling their bodies (and body parts) to violent and sick men across the “developed” West.

Hierarchical marriages that are hailed as biblical need to be identified as a curse that has been sanctified by those who do not know the heart of God. Those who claim to have unchallenged authority from God over others act on sinful urges and bring death into the world. Jesus has so much to offer when it comes to relationships, but it is miles away from this so-called “biblical” model. Before we turn to the wonderful, difficult relational message that Jesus models, we need to look even more deeply at the ways a Christian “blessing” of the curse contributes to the suffering of the world.