Читать книгу The Christmas Secret - Lee Mckenzie - Страница 9

Brimming with anger and overcome with grief, Sam steadied herself by leaning against the door frame.

Breathe, she told herself. Just breathe. You can get through this.

AJ’s nod in response to Kristi’s question was almost imperceptible. He didn’t look at Sam, but she still detected the same raw emotion that had greeted her at the door, along with the panic she’d seen when Claire suggested they come in here.

“How old is he?” Kristi asked. “Three? Four?”

AJ still wouldn’t look at Sam, and she couldn’t have torn her gaze away from him if she tried. “No,” he said. “He’s … ah … just two.”

Two. AJ had a two-year-old son. Which meant he must have a wife. A wife who was probably already married to him when he’d been sleeping with Sam. Which meant he’d been busy getting his wife pregnant while Sam had grappled with the decision to give her son a better life than she ever could.

Oh, God. She couldn’t breathe. Her heart raced as scenes from the past flashed through her mind at a dizzying pace, ending with AJ’s father. James Harris had said his son had a history of getting involved with women like her and then dumping them. She hadn’t believed him, even told him as much, but that hadn’t ended the conversation. He’d said that if she kept seeing AJ, he would put her out of business. Then he’d followed up that threat by saying her mother needed to be institutionalized and asking if she was prepared to do that. Blindsided—how in hell had he found out about her mother?—Sam knew then he wasn’t just a dangerous man, he was evil. Her life was already hard enough, and she thought being in love was supposed to make it easier.

Ending things with AJ had been the easy part. He had accepted it with a dismissive shrug, exactly like the one his father had given her when she said putting her mother in an institution wasn’t an option. Like father, like son? She hadn’t completely believed it then, but she did now.

A month later she suspected she might be pregnant, and by the time she’d moved past the denial and finally saw a doctor, she was further along than she’d realized. She couldn’t abandon her mother, but neither could she raise a child in the unstable environment she’d grown up in. The rest was inevitable.

“He’s adorable. Cute dog, too.” As usual, Kristi was oblivious to the elephant in the room. “He looks tall for his age. Must get that from his dad.”

AJ looked as though he wished she would stop talking. Sam sure as hell did.

“What about your wife?” Kristi asked, still not picking up on the tension. “Will she mind having us in the way?”

AJ’s eyes darted in Sam’s direction, but he looked away before his gaze met hers.

Coward, she thought. Two-timing bastard.

“My … ah … she doesn’t live here. I have a nanny who takes care of … us. And the house. She’s outside right now with … ah … you’ll meet her later.”

Claire, who never missed a trick, had been studying Sam’s reaction to all this new information. Now, to Sam’s relief, she took control of the conversation and redirected it back to their reason for being here. “I didn’t realize you had a family. We’ll do our best to keep the disruption to a minimum.”

“Please, I don’t want you to worry about that. I work at home but I’ll … we’ll stay out of your way.”

The questions kept tumbling through Sam’s mind. Had his wife left him? No surprise there, but to leave her child behind? How could she? Then again, based on her experience with the Harris family, she might not have had any say in the matter. AJ working at home was a surprise, though. He was in line to take over the business when his father retired. Could he run such a huge company from home?

Sam realized she was still staring at him while he continued to avoid looking at her. He’d never worn a ring, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t married when they were dating. Who are you kidding? They had never gone on a date. All they did was sleep together. After his father’s ultimatum, she had assumed AJ kept their affair a secret because, like his father, he’d thought she was good enough to sleep with a Harris but not good enough to be a Harris. Now it seemed he wasn’t just arrogant, he was married. Ringless, but married.

“Sam?” Claire’s voice gently interrupted her nightmarish journey through the past. “What are your thoughts about the kitchen?”

They could throw a stick of dynamite in it for all she cared. “We should paint the cabinets, for sure. Replace the counter and flooring, and bring in another new light fixture.” She should take a closer look at the sink and faucet, but she would have to cross the kitchen to do that. Then she’d be standing by the window and … and she couldn’t look out there. Not yet. She needed time to adjust to the reality that AJ had a son … and she didn’t.

Three years ago she’d given away a part of herself when she’d put her son up for adoption. She hadn’t even had the luxury of mourning her loss. She’d had to get back to work because she had to put food on the table, pay rent and her mother’s medical bills. She had coped with her loss the same way she coped with everything else in her life—by carrying on with her responsibilities and not letting herself think about how much her life sucked.

But this … finding out that he’d been able to keep his son while she’d had to give up hers … this felt like more than she could handle. Oh, God. Now she was having trouble breathing again. She glanced over her shoulder toward the front of the house. Maybe she should make an excuse to leave. She could tell Kristi and Claire that she had to get home to her mother, that they could continue with the site visit and fill her in tomorrow.

AJ spoke first. “I have work to do so unless you need me for anything, I’ll let the three of you get to it.”

Claire, the consummate professional, was quick to respond. “Of course. Please don’t let us keep you. This should only take an hour, maybe less. We can let ourselves out and I’ll call you tomorrow, after we’ve worked out our expenses and a timeline for getting everything done.”

He responded with a nod and a vague smile and left the kitchen. Sam could tell he was deliberately ignoring her. She wanted to throw her tape measure at him.

She had good aim and she could easily hit him squarely in the back of the head. Seconds later the slam of an outside door was followed by the sound of his footsteps on stairs. Whatever work he had to do, it was in the backyard. With his son.

Claire faced Sam, one hand clutching her iPad, the other on her hip. “What on earth was that all about?”

Tears tickled Sam’s eyelids. You will not cry, she told herself. Not here. He’s not worth it. “What do you mean?” she asked, trying to feign surprise, knowing she failed miserably. Trust Claire to figure this out.

“Don’t give me that. It’s totally obvious you and the man in black have a past, and it clearly didn’t end well.”

That was the understatement of the century. Sam shook her head. “I can’t talk about it here. I’ll fill you in later.”

Claire hugged her. “Sorry, hon. I had no idea.”

Kristi made it a group hug. “Will you be able to handle this?”

Sam momentarily indulged in her friends’ affection, then pulled away and put on a brave face. “I’ll be fine. And there’s no way you could have known. If I paid more attention to who our clients are, I wouldn’t have been blindsided.”

Claire wasn’t letting go that easily. “We’re almost into December and the pre-Christmas season is always slow. This is a big job and we can really use the business right now, but if—”

Sam took a deep breath and a step back. “No ‘buts.’ We’re taking this job. I’ll be fine. It’s just … I didn’t expect this to be his house and seeing him caught me off guard, but I’ll be fine.” She had to be. The company might need the work, but she needed the income even more. “Can we finish up and get out of here?”

“Of course. Let’s check out the rest of the main floor,” Claire said. “There’s a big living room, plus the dining room and a small den. Then we can do the upstairs.”

Sam’s heart started to race again. The bedrooms would be upstairs. AJ’s bedroom. Had he and his wife lived here? Had he and his son moved in after they split up? It didn’t matter. He lived here now, and his bedroom had better not need any work. There could be a gaping hole in the ceiling, and it would stay that way because it would be a frosty day in hell before she would set a foot in AJ’s bedroom.

Half an hour later Sam stood with Claire and Kristi in the upstairs hallway, staring into the bathroom. It had been renovated in the fifties, complete with pink lino on the floor and pink and black ceramic tiles on the walls.

Kristi laughed. “This is one of the tackiest bathrooms I’ve ever seen. What were they thinking? Thank goodness the fixtures are white. That’ll keep the cost down if we decide to renovate.”

Sam thought about the bathroom in the apartment she shared with her mother. It had crumbling grout and no personality, but, oddly enough, she liked this one. Her mother would, too.

Claire stepped into the room. “I’m not sure we should. Bathroom renos are time-consuming and expensive. Leaving this as is would mean more money in the client’s pocket, and this retro look is surprisingly popular.” She picked up a pink crocheted doll covering a roll of toilet paper. “But, oh, my goodness, I’ve never seen a house with so much stuff in it. Bad enough there’s a ton of these kinds of things.” She set the doll down and picked up a matching tissue-box holder. “And seriously, how many doilies does one person need?”

Kristi laughed. “I counted eighty-seven on the main floor before I lost track. On the plus side, if the client is interested in getting rid of the vintage linens, most will fetch a few dollars apiece.”

Sam couldn’t imagine AJ having an attachment to his grandmother’s fussy clutter. And Kristi might be right about the linens, but no one would want kitschy crocheted bathroom accessories.

“Sam? What are your thoughts?” Claire asked.

She didn’t much care whether AJ saved any money, but she was completely on board with saving time. “I say we leave it. After Kristi works her magic in here, it’ll look great.”

Claire was making notes as she left the bathroom. “Good plan. Let’s check out the bedrooms.”

“How can you walk, talk and type at the same time?” Kristi asked.

Claire grinned. “What can I say? It’s a gift.”

Sam had always admired her business partner’s multitasking abilities, and she had never been more grateful for Claire’s levelheaded business savvy than she was right now because she knew she could count on her to keep her grounded through this ordeal. Kristi was, well, not so grounded. She tended to leap before she looked and talk before she thought, rushed into everything with boundless enthusiasm, and everyone loved her for it. Or in spite of it. But Kristi would have her back, too. Together they’d get through this, and then Sam’s life could get back to normal. Not that she had a “normal” life, but there was a lot to be said for maintaining the status quo.

“Let’s check out the bedrooms,” Claire said. “This looks like the master, and I’m guessing it was the grandmother’s.”

Kristi groaned. “More doilies and plastic flower arrangements. Those must go with the bowl of plastic fruit on the dining-room table.”

Sam looked past the clutter to the flower-and-butterfly-patterned wallpaper. “After everything’s cleared out, I’ll need a day to strip the wallpaper and another day to paint. The oak floor is in good shape, though.”

Claire made more notes on the move. “This must be AJ’s room.” She shot a quick glance at Sam.

Sam hastily perused the room from the doorway and stepped back. The space was neat as a pin, almost austere compared to the grandmother’s, and even better there was no wallpaper.

“From too much personality in Grandma’s room to none in here,” Kristi said. “I get that he’s a guy, and guys usually don’t have a clue when it comes to decorating, but this room is so boring it’s painful. Doesn’t need much work, though. A fresh coat of paint and some new drapes should do it.”

The room had better be able to paint itself, Sam thought, because she wasn’t doing it. The simple fact that it was his room was enough to get her heart pounding, but what if he and his wife had lived here? Conceived their child in this bed?

“Two more rooms,” Claire said. “This must be the nanny’s.”

Sam took one look and fell in love with it. The nanny’s room was hands down the most welcoming space in the house. Although it was a typically gray late-November day in Seattle, the room felt bright, almost sunny. Strangely so, Sam thought. Right now the only occupant was a teddy bear snuggled into the corner of an overstuffed yellow upholstered armchair with a copy of Green Eggs and Ham on the seat next to him. Sam could practically hear the warm laughter that would accompany story time. On the floor next to the chair sat a basket full of colorful yarn and knitting needles, and adjacent to that a small round side table painted bright blue. On top of the table there was a vase filled with fresh-cut flowers and a quirky-looking tea service on a wooden tray, a teapot in the shape of a giant strawberry and two pink china cups and saucers. Tea for two. The nanny and AJ’s son? Sam wondered.

Claire walked into the room and admired the china. “This is so adorable. I’ve never seen heart-shaped saucers.”

Sam’s heart felt as flat as a pancake, as though the life was being squeezed out of it. She had never been entertained with tea parties, not even as a very young child. Even back then her mother hadn’t been well and although her father had dutifully provided the basics, there’d been no fun, no games, no laughter. But this woman, the nanny, had moved in here and created a personal space that both fit with the rest of the house and was yet set apart from it, and its welcome hominess gave Sam a good feeling about her.

“This room is perfect,” Kristi said. “Even the wallpaper works in here. I wouldn’t change a thing.”

Neither would Sam.

“Excellent.” Claire made a note of that. “That leaves the nursery, which is right here across the hall. Should we take a look?”

Sam nodded a silent affirmative, and cast one last look at the nanny’s room before reluctantly following her partners to the room across the hall. Earlier when they’d been in the kitchen, she had deliberately avoided looking outside because she was emotionally unprepared to see AJ’s son. And now she wasn’t ready for this.

The nursery, the only room in the house with a bright modern flair, had been painted a fresh shade of pale green. The child-size trundle bed was covered with a cozy patchwork quilt and heaped with stuffed animals. The green-and-yellow polka-dot upholstery on the armchair and ottoman coordinated with the multitoned green-and-yellow-striped drapes on the window next to them. Had AJ chosen these colors, this furniture? Did he sit here with his son? She didn’t know why, but she found it impossible to picture him as a father. Or had his wife decorated the room before she left? Did she still visit? Did the child live with her part of the time?

“Sam?” Claire’s gentle tone eased her out of her daze. “I was saying the bedrooms shouldn’t take long, since the nanny’s room and nursery are fine as they are.”

“Sorry, and yes, you’re right. The other two bedrooms won’t take long. I guess we should start with the grandmother’s since no one’s living in it. I’ll have to move the furniture away from the walls to get at the wallpaper.”

“You’ll need help with that,” Claire said. “I’ll get Marlie to call the movers as soon as I get back to the office this afternoon and find out when they’re available. We’ll have them do the room when they rearrange things downstairs.”

Kristi stowed her camera in her shoulder bag. “I’m going home to download the photographs I took today and spend the afternoon working on a color scheme. I want to be home when Jenna gets out of school because yesterday my sweet darling daughter had a boy there when I got home.”

“Ah, the teenage years,” Claire said with a grin. “I remember them well. Except I didn’t have a boyfriend,” she added quickly.

Neither did Sam. She’d never invited a friend home, either, and wouldn’t have dreamed of bringing home a boy she was interested in. He would have made a run for it.

“I remember those years, too.” Kristi sighed. “I also remember what teenage boys are like. Hormones permanently in overdrive. That’s kind of how I got to be a mom so young.”

“You were eighteen when your daughter was born,” Sam said because she felt she should say something reassuring. “Jenna’s only thirteen.”

Kristi rolled her eyes. “Thirteen going on twenty-something.”

“And the boy?” Claire asked.

“She says he’s fifteen, which, knowing my daughter, means he’s probably closer to sixteen.”

Claire put an arm around Kristi. “Young girls always date up. Besides, Jenna’s a good kid with a good head on her shoulders. I’d give a lot to have one just like her.”

From the time the three of them had become business partners, Claire had talked about how desperately she wanted children. Now that her marriage was on the rocks, the likelihood of that was slimmer than ever. Sam didn’t allow herself to think about a family, or the future. It was too hard. Hell, just seeing another little boy’s bedroom had sent her mind racing back into the past.

What if …?

If only …

Don’t go there!

“Do you have plans for the rest of the day, Sam?”

She gave herself another mental shake. “Ah, yes. Stop at the drugstore to pick up my mother’s medication. Grab a few groceries.” Precious few after she paid for the prescription.

“How is she?” Kristi asked. “Any better?”

Sam wished she hadn’t said anything. Although Claire and Kristi had never met her mother, she had reluctantly told them about her. There were days when Sam couldn’t leave her alone, and her business partners needed to know why.

She shrugged. “A little better, I think.” She hoped, but she didn’t want to talk about her mother. “After dinner I’ll go over my notes and come up with a timeline for getting all this work done. I’ll email it to both of you and we can go over it at our meeting tomorrow morning.”

“Excellent,” Claire said. “I’ll do two appraisals—one for the house as it is now and another that will include all the proposed updates. We can present the package to … the client.” She eyed Sam over the top rim of her dark-framed glasses. “Then we’ll take it from there.”

The three of them trooped down the back stairs to the kitchen, Sam last and desperately hoping to avoid another encounter with “the client.” In the kitchen they were greeted by an aproned silver-haired woman, who stood at the stove stirring a large pot. The savory-scented steam rising from it reminded Sam’s stomach it was almost lunchtime.

“Hello, girls. I’m Annie Dobson, the nanny.”

“Nice to meet you.” Claire shook the woman’s hand and stepped back. “What are you cooking? It smells wonderful.”

“Homemade chicken noodle soup. It’s a favorite around here.”

Sam’s stomach rumbled hungrily.

“We’ll get out of your way so you can have lunch,” Claire said. “Is Mr. Harris … I mean, is AJ around?”

“He had to go out, so he took young William with him. Would you like me to pass along a message?”

So, his son’s name was William.

“Yes, that would be great. Please let him know I’ll call as soon as we have a work plan in place. I’m Claire, by the way. This is Kristi, the interior decorator, and Sam’s our carpenter.”

“Nice to meet you. It’ll be nice having some young women around here for a change, especially a lady carpenter.” Her blue-eyed gaze gave Sam a good going-over. “You look familiar. Have we met before?”

“Um …” Sam searched her memory for an image of the woman. Had she worked for the Harris family when Sam had renovated their corporate offices? She was a nanny, so unlikely. “No, I don’t think so.”

Annie’s scrutiny didn’t let up. “No, maybe not. I usually never forget a face, though, and there’s something about you …” She looked away finally and gave the pot of soup another stir. “I’m sure it’ll come to me. Oh, I almost forgot. Mr. Harris asked me to give each of you a key to the front door so you can come and go as you please.” She pulled the keys out of her apron pocket.

“Thanks.” Claire accepted the keys and passed them around.

Sam tucked hers in the pocket of her jeans. “Nice to meet you. I should go,” she said to Claire and Kristi. “I have lots to do.” And she wanted to get out of here before AJ returned. She still had a lot of questions, like did he plan to live here while they did the work or would he make other arrangements? His parents’ home on Mercer Island was certainly big enough. The apartment Sam shared with her mother would fit in their pool house, with room to spare.

Sam hated giving a rat’s ass about his living arrangements, hated herself for hoping he’d be here every day and hated that she still found him the most attractive man she had ever met.