Читать книгу Phantasmagoria and Other Poems - Lewis Carroll, Льюис Кэрролл, Льюїс Керролл - Страница 2

One winter night, at half-past nine,

      Cold, tired, and cross, and muddy,

I had come home, too late to dine,

And supper, with cigars and wine,

      Was waiting in the study.

There was a strangeness in the room,

      And Something white and wavy

Was standing near me in the gloom —

I took it for the carpet-broom

      Left by that careless slavey.

But presently the Thing began

      To shiver and to sneeze:

On which I said “Come, come, my man!

That’s a most inconsiderate plan.

      Less noise there, if you please!”

“I’ve caught a cold,” the Thing replies,

      “Out there upon the landing.”

I turned to look in some surprise,

And there, before my very eyes,

      A little Ghost was standing!

He trembled when he caught my eye,

      And got behind a chair.

“How came you here,” I said, “and why?

I never saw a thing so shy.

      Come out!  Don’t shiver there!”

He said “I’d gladly tell you how,

      And also tell you why;

But” (here he gave a little bow)

“You’re in so bad a temper now,

      You’d think it all a lie.

“And as to being in a fright,

      Allow me to remark

That Ghosts have just as good a right

In every way, to fear the light,

      As Men to fear the dark.”

“No plea,” said I, “can well excuse

      Such cowardice in you:

For Ghosts can visit when they choose,

Whereas we Humans ca’n’t refuse

      To grant the interview.”

He said “A flutter of alarm

      Is not unnatural, is it?

I really feared you meant some harm:

But, now I see that you are calm,

      Let me explain my visit.

“Houses are classed, I beg to state,

      According to the number

Of Ghosts that they accommodate:

(The Tenant merely counts as weight,

      With Coals and other lumber).

“This is a ‘one-ghost’ house, and you

      When you arrived last summer,

May have remarked a Spectre who

Was doing all that Ghosts can do

      To welcome the new-comer.

“In Villas this is always done —

      However cheaply rented:

For, though of course there’s less of fun

When there is only room for one,

      Ghosts have to be contented.

“That Spectre left you on the Third —

      Since then you’ve not been haunted:

For, as he never sent us word,

’Twas quite by accident we heard

      That any one was wanted.

“A Spectre has first choice, by right,

      In filling up a vacancy;

Then Phantom, Goblin, Elf, and Sprite —

If all these fail them, they invite

      The nicest Ghoul that they can see.

“The Spectres said the place was low,

      And that you kept bad wine:

So, as a Phantom had to go,

And I was first, of course, you know,

      I couldn’t well decline.”

“No doubt,” said I, “they settled who

      Was fittest to be sent

Yet still to choose a brat like you,

To haunt a man of forty-two,

      Was no great compliment!”

“I’m not so young, Sir,” he replied,

      “As you might think.  The fact is,

In caverns by the water-side,

And other places that I’ve tried,

      I’ve had a lot of practice:

“But I have never taken yet

      A strict domestic part,

And in my flurry I forget

The Five Good Rules of Etiquette

      We have to know by heart.”

My sympathies were warming fast

      Towards the little fellow:

He was so utterly aghast

At having found a Man at last,

      And looked so scared and yellow.

“At least,” I said, “I’m glad to find

      A Ghost is not a dumb thing!

But pray sit down: you’ll feel inclined

(If, like myself, you have not dined)

      To take a snack of something:

“Though, certainly, you don’t appear

      A thing to offer food to!

And then I shall be glad to hear —

If you will say them loud and clear —

      The Rules that you allude to.”

“Thanks!  You shall hear them by and by.

      This is a piece of luck!”

“What may I offer you?” said I.

“Well, since you are so kind, I’ll try

      A little bit of duck.

“One slice!  And may I ask you for

      Another drop of gravy?”

I sat and looked at him in awe,

For certainly I never saw

      A thing so white and wavy.

And still he seemed to grow more white,

      More vapoury, and wavier —

Seen in the dim and flickering light,

As he proceeded to recite

      His “Maxims of Behaviour.”