The Yummy Mummy’s Family Handbook

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Liz Fraser. The Yummy Mummy’s Family Handbook

The Yummy Mummy’s Family Handbook. LIZ FRASER

Table of Contents

PART ONE Bricks and Mortar. Laying the Foundations: An introduction

Clash of the Tartans: Bringing two Families together

House Structure: Establishing the family hierarchy

PART TWO The Front Porch. The F Word: Becoming a family

To Have, or Have Not?

Popping the question: On your knees, ladies!

PART THREE The Entrance Hall

When Two Become Three

Dellie, married six years, mother of Arthur, four, and Mary, eighteen months:

Best in Show: Keeping up appearances in public

Etiquette: Here comes a family—run!

The Family Uniform

Don’t Mind the Mess: Simple ways of making it look tidy

You’ve Got Mail: Dealing with the family admin

Family Notice Board: Weddings, funerals and other family gatherings

Weddings

Funerals

Family parties

Christmas

PART FOUR The Cupboard Under The Stairs

Skeletons: Leave ‘em in or get ‘em out?

Little White Lies. Rachel, mother of Isabella, eight, Sara, five, and Daisy, three:

Anita, mother of Shania, nine, and Dan, fire:

Amy, mother of Jess, six, and Will, fire:

To Clean or not to Clean?

Bluffer’s guide

Meter Beaters: Reducing the household bills

PART FIVE The Utility Room

My Not-So-Beautiful Launderette

Sharing the Load: How about some help around here?!

Sugie, photographer, mother of three and wife for eight years:

Julie, data analyst, mother of four and wife for twelve years:

Julia, community nurse, mother of two and wife for six years:

John, software developer, father of two, married for five years:

Peter, scientist, father of three, married ten years:

Ed, musician, father of one, married three years:

Competitive Exhaustion

Cook, Cleaner, Nanny, Whore: How many jobs can a woman have?

PART SIX The Pantry

The Weekly Shop: Easing the strain

Not In My House: Banning certain foods and drinks

Cathy, mother of Jonathan, eight, and Millie, four:

Storing It All: Tips for keeping food fresh and organised

PART SEVEN The Kitchen. The Heart of the Home…

…And the Unofficial Front Line

Cooking with Mother (…and Father…)

Sarah, mother of Louisa, five, and Robert, two:

What’s for Dinner?

Practise, Practise. It does get easier…

Granny knew best: Cheap, healthy cooking tips

PART EIGHT The Dining Room

Feeding time at the Zoo: The importance of family mealtimes

Bums on Seats: Table manners and other essentials

Rules

Do as I Say, Not as I Do. A busy mother’s mantra

Why Isn’t Mummy Eating?

Yuk! I’m Not Eating That! Dealing with fussy eaters

Gaby, mother of Liam, four:

The Food Wars

Small but perfectly formed

Eat your greens! How to get their daily five portions down the hatch

Dinner Time: But when?

Hannah, mother of Katie, seven, and Harry, five:

Dawn, mother of Isabel, six, and Louis, three:

Sue, mother of Robert, eight, Ben, five, and Bethang, two:

Bottoms Up! Alcohol and other delights…

You Are How You Eat: Stop shovelling; start enjoying

That’s Entertainment: Reducing dinner-party stress…

PART NINE The Living Room or Lounge. Well, which is it?

PG Tips: Should they really be watching that?

Switch it off! The television wars…

On the Couch: When counselling can help

Space Rage: Sharing your chill-out zone

PART TEN The Playroom

Do we really need all of these toys?

Hannah, nanny of Claire, six, and Thomas, four:

‘Mum, I’m bored!’ Oh Help

When Push comes to Shove

Talent Spotting: Finding your own Picasso, Mozart or Shakespeare

WWW Dot: Surfing the World Wide Worry

‘Can I go to Tom’s house?’ The joy, and hell, of ‘playdates’

Choosing their Friends

Play Nicely!

Becky, mother of Rollie, five, and Charlotte, two:

Louisa, mother of Helene, six, Peter, four, and Alfie, two:

Fear Factor: The cotton-wool effect

Playdough is for babies!: Finding things for them to do as they get older

Don’t Break it! Getting kids to look after their things

PART ELEVEN The Landing

Whose Life is This Anyway? When you have a little wobble…

Julia, mother of Katie, eight, Louis, five, and JJ, two:

Will I Ever Know Exactly How To Do It?

Getting Out Of A Family Rut

But We Don’t Have the Time!

Wave Theory: A lesson in family physics

PART TWELVE The Master Bedroom. Love and Marriage…

I Love You, I Love You Not, I Love You, I Love You Not: Falling in and out of love

A Room of One’s Own: The problems of sharing a bedroom

Who’s in the Driving Seat?

What’s Yours Is Mine. Mostly…

Money Matters: In for a penny, in for the lot?

The Secret Stash: Putting some aside for a rainy day…

Let’s Talk About Sex, Baby

Problem One: How much sex is enough?

Problem Two: What kind of sex is good enough?

Problem Three: Why don’t we have sex as often as we used to?

Just say no

Spice up your life

Taking your mood to bed

Toys for the boys—and the girls…

Reading dirty, seeing dirty, writing dirty…talking dirty

Playing Away: Affairs, flirting, and other naughty things

Affairs

Sophie, married eleven years, mother of Jonny, eight, and Mia, four:

Maria, married ten years, mother of Jessica, nine, and Claudia, fire:

The eyes have it: why flirting isn’t all bad

If it happens

The Art of Making Conversation

Growing Together…Or growing apart

And another thing…! Common rows, and how to survive them

Nine Lives…And all of them important

Bella, married for nine years, mather of Evie, five, and James, two:

When Two Become One…

Taking the Rough with the Smooth: Long-term relationships are a bumpy ride

The Show’s Over: What happens when things go wrong

Ten Years Down the Road…and still struggling with the map

PART THIRTEEN The Children’s Bedroom

Kids, eh? Who’d ’ave ’em?

How Many Times Have I Told You? Common rows and how to reduce them

Eva, mather of Joseph, ten, Marcus, five, and Marianna, three:

Where did you Learn that?

Introducing ‘Everyone’: Your new worst friend. Amanda, mother of Sophie, eleven, and Georgia, eight:

Claire, mother of Jake, six, and Emily, three:

Money Munchers: Cutting the cost of kids

Packed Lunch Tips

Pocket Money

Growing Pains: It starts very early!

Jane, mother of Betta, eight, Sophia, six, and Charlie, three:

Behind Closed Doors: When they want their own space

Discipline

Other People’s kids. Geeta, mother of India, four, and Misha, one:

Don’t F***ing Swear, Kids

Manners

Birthday Parties

Emily, mother of Laura, nine, Miranda, six, and Thomas, three:

The Big Sleep: Getting enough, nightmares, bed-wetting and other nocturnal trials

Getting enough

Nightmares and night terrors

Bed-wetting

Sleepovers

Letting Go: When school starts

Education, Education, Education

Teaching at Home: Doing your bit

The Things They Say: We do love them really…

PART FOURTEEN The Extension. Here we Go again: Having another baby

Mind the gap: What is a good age gap to leave between children?

Pregnancy: No, it won’t be at all like last time

The early days

The middle bit

Mummy’s having a baby

More baby clobber

Hey! What is my body playing at?

It feels different—it’s definitely a girl

Preparative Pep Talks

The final months

Activities to avoid

Taking Care of Number One

The Birth

Meet the Sibling: Fingers crossed…

And Then There Were Three: New challenges with two kids…

But I thought I already had no free time!

The emotional minefield worsens

Favouritism

Comparison

Changes to your Daily Routine

Your Relationship with your Partner: Who?

Regression, Regression, Regression

Gently, Darling!

Age One to Two: Walking, talking and all that jazz…

Walking

When should my child start to walk?

Talking

The Terrible Twos: Why tantrums happen and how to cope with them

Tantrums

When do tantrums start?

What is a tantrum?

Why do kids have tantrums?

What can I do to prevent tantrums?

Losing the Lunchtime Sleep

PART FIFTEEN The Guest Bedroom

Your Parents: Getting to know each other all over again…

Your Grandparents

In-laws

Brothers and sisters-in-law too—oh help!

Make friends, make friends; never, never break friends…

Playground friends

When Kids Fight…and so do you

Rachel, mother of Isy, nine, and Harry, five:

Playground Politics: Emotional breakdown, anyone?

Becky, mother of Hannah, eight, and Daisy, five:

Old Friends

PART SIXTEEN The Study

Work-Life Balance: Yeah, right!

Amy, married to James and mother of Esme, five, and George, two:

Anna, married to Pete and mother of Rosie, eight, Rory, five, and Lily, three:

Who deleted Mummy’s files? The pitfalls of working from home

To Work or Not To Work? That is your question…

Childcare: Possible solutions for your ‘can’t be in three places at once’ dilemmas

What Do People Do All Day? Showing your kids what you do for a living

PART SEVENTEEN The Bathroom. Can I come in? Getting some ‘me’ time in there

You Scratch my Head, I’ll Scratch yours: How to beat nits

A Hairy Issue: Hairdresser or DIY for your kids?

Where do Babies come from?

Helen, mother of Josephine, eight, and Louis, three:

In Sickness and in Health: Family medical matters

Family Anxiety. When the pressure gets too much…

Teeth. While we’re at it…

PART EIGHTEEN The Toilet. Lifting the lid on personal hygiene

I did it! The joys of potty training

Dingles, Wilvins, Wotsits and Doo-dahs: How to talk about those fiddly bits

PART NINETEEN The Attic

The Travelling Circus: Going away as a family

Everything but the Kitchen Sink: Clever packing

Home From Home: Bringing your habits with you

Where to stay

Culture Vulture, Beach Babe or Adrenaline Junkie? Finding a holiday for all the family

Going it Alone: When you need a break

Travelling Rules

Top Family Hotels and Travel Companies

PART TWENTY The Garden. Garden or Playground? Keeping the kids happy outdoors

The Green House: Planet-saving tips

PART TWENTY-ONE The Garden Shed

Hobbies and Hubbies: Keeping your own interests alive

Anyone for Tennis? Getting active together

DIY: Divorce, anyone?

PART TWENTY-TWO One For The Road

Acknowledgements

Index

About the author

Copyright

About the Publisher

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Title Page

Dedication

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Sort the rest into urgent and non-urgent. Leave all urgent things in the middle of your work space in the kitchen so you can’t do anything until you’ve paid that bill or RSVPed that invitation.

Get a nice container for all non-urgent incoming mail. Ours is a pretty, metal hanging basket, and it’s very narrow so it fills up quickly. As soon as it looks even full-ish we know it’s time to go through it. This means nothing is ever more than a week old when we come to deal with it, which is usually fine—it’s non-urgent, see?

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