Читать книгу ‘…startled by his furry shorts!’ - Louise Rennison - Страница 40

She said (chewy chew), “So you said that he had to be your one and only boyfriend scenario or else that was it? Arrivederci, Masimo?”

I said, “Yes, but…”

“Well, what in the name of Slim’s outsize pyjamas were you thinking of? Are you mad?”

“No, I’m not mad, Jas. I just happen to have a friend who looks a lot like you who said, ‘Just be yourself.’”

“What?”

“You said being yourself and genuine was like having a generous nose. Like I have got. The exact words used were: ‘Just because you have a generous nose, don’t go to the nose-disguiser shop; let your own nose run free and wild.’”

“What complete fool said that?”

“YOU did, Jas.”

“Did I? Well, yeah, but I didn’t mean it, did I? Clearly. That was in the sanctity of our own brains, wasn’t it? I mean, we were going to the PRETEND nose-disguiser shop. I didn’t actually mean you should BE yourself. That is just stupid.”

I really really could kill her. In fact, if I attacked her stupid fringe suddenly, she might choke on her stupid Midget Gem, and that would be good.

Sadly, Jas had got interested now. She said, “So let me get this right – he’s choosing between you and Wet Lindsay? Blimey, does she know that? Because if she does, you are dead as a doughnut. Deader.”

Cheers.