Читать книгу ‘…startled by his furry shorts!’ - Louise Rennison - Страница 79

Yes indeedy, even though I am on the rack of luuurve I have the bison horns to comfort me. As we ambled off to Ace Gang Headquarters behind the fives court I said, “Do you know I can feel it in my waters, the bison horns are a symbol of hope. The fact that Slim gave them back is a sign from Baby Jesus, it is the dawn of a new era.”

Ellen said, “What, er, do you… er, do you mean that people will be more spiritual and get back to nature and looking after the earth and…”

Is she mad? I said, “No, what it means is that Masimo will be mine, mine all miney mine mine.”

I said it to the gang, apart from Jas, who I was ignorez-vousing like billio. She was doing reverse ignorez-vousing by pretending to be interested in what Ellen was saying. I said to the others, “In some ways I am looking forward to the autumn term because of course it means the return of the beret. Imagine the scene: a cold morning at Stalag 14, the grey day stretches ahead filled with lesbian perverts and sadistic ‘teachers’; but then up the hill, past the Foxwood lads setting fire to their farts and generally being prats, comes a sight to lift the spirits. Could it be? Is it true? Silhouetted against the sky is an awesome sight. It’s the return of the Ace Gang in winter uniform. Berets proudly worn with bison-horn attachments. Yesssss!”

The gang broke into spontaneous Klingon saluting. Maybe everything is going to be all right.