Читать книгу First-Time Parent: The honest guide to coping brilliantly and staying sane in your baby’s first year - Lucy Atkins - Страница 24

After the midwife or doctor has made sure you and the baby are doing well, they’ll leave you all together for a bit–possibly in a ‘recovery room’–so that you can get to know one another, before moving you to the ward where a Perspex cot will be put next to your bed. It can be unsettling and even strangely lonely to find that you–and you alone–are suddenly in charge of your tiny newborn. Midwives may be too busy to answer questions like ‘Am I holding her right?’.

Most new mothers, when they talk about the midwives they had for the birth, are overcome with gratitude and admiration. Midwives in general do a superlative job. But they are not superhuman. On the maternity ward the midwives are likely to be extremely over-stretched. ‘There was one midwife for ten women on the ward,’ says Heather. ‘I had had a C-section and couldn’t pick Ellie up to cuddle or feed her. At one point she was crying next to me for 40 minutes and the midwife couldn’t help me pick her up because she was having to deal with other requests. This was awful–I eventually just burst into tears myself.’ You may have to be very assertive to get attention and you will certainly have to wait unless it’s an emergency. It’s a good idea to call the midwife early if you have any inkling that you are going to need something (for instance, if you need help to go to the loo or are going to need painkillers soon).

If it is night-time, fathers are then sent home–no dads are allowed on the ward at night. This is why you want your partner there as much as possible during the day. ‘I wasn’t prepared for the first hours alone with the baby,’ says Sara, mother of Tom, nine months. ‘He was born in the early hours of the morning, and my partner and mum didn’t pitch up again at hospital until the afternoon, which really upset me. I’d say company and support on day one is of paramount importance.’ You may be discharged as little as six hours after an uncomplicated birth, but most of us leave hospital about twenty-four hours after giving birth vaginally and three to five days after a Caesarean. If there are any complications, you may have to stay longer.