Читать книгу Hollywood Hills Collection - Lynne Marshall, Amalie Berlin - Страница 41

CHAPTER NINE

DAMIEN STOOD AND watched her leave. He was torn, caught between a rock and a hard place. He wanted to go after her, he knew he should go after her, but he didn’t trust Brooke. He didn’t know why she was there and he had a bad feeling about her reasons.

In the shock accompanying Brooke’s unannounced arrival he’d completely forgotten the plans he’d made with Abi. If he’d remembered he would have called her to postpone. The last thing he’d wanted had been for the two of them to meet and the only thing that could make matters worse was if they’d met without him present. He had no idea what had transpired between them but he could only assume Brooke wouldn’t have been particularly welcoming. She had a jealous, possessive nature and even though she didn’t want him, he had no doubt that she wouldn’t want to know that someone else did.

He didn’t want Brooke to know about Abi, he didn’t want her to start asking questions, so he definitely would have made other arrangements. Not that he could have explained what was going on. He really didn’t know what Brooke was doing there but there was sure to be a reason. It would be more than just a visit to see Summer. There was always an ulterior motive as far as his manipulative, scheming ex-wife was concerned. Sure, she did it with charm, using her feminine wiles and acting skills to her advantage, but that didn’t change the fact that there was always something to be gained for her. But, at the moment, he hadn’t worked out what it was and until he knew the details he wasn’t about to leave her alone.

Abi, for all her issues, was far less complicated, far more trusting. There’d be time to sort things out later with her, time to explain, so he let her go. He needed to conserve his energy to deal with Brooke. No doubt there was bound to be some drama or demand, and now it was time to face her music.

* * *

Abi had checked her phone a thousand times on Friday night after she’d run from Damien’s but he hadn’t called once. She’d worked herself up into a fever of indignation, shame and anger and had eventually switched her phone off. She didn’t want to be mocked by its silence. She spent the rest of the night imagining all the sorts of things Damien and Brooke might be doing. She knew she was jumping to conclusions but he’d looked so awkward and uncomfortable when she’d appeared on his doorstep, so guilty, that of course her imagination had gone into overdrive.

It appeared she did have a type after all—good-looking, charming men who were only interested in getting her into bed. Did she deliberately choose men who would treat her badly? A psychiatrist would probably tell her it was all connected to issues with her father.

What would Caroline tell her? She knew her psychologist would berate her for thinking unkind thoughts about Damien when he’d done nothing to deserve them, but in Abi’s eyes, choosing not to come after her, choosing not to explain, meant that he’d chosen Brooke over her. She couldn’t blame him, Brooke was Summer’s mother after all, but it hurt that, with everything he’d told her, when the chips were down he hadn’t chosen her.

She needed to toughen up, needed to learn from her experiences, her mistakes, and stop being so gullible.

Abi lay in bed all Saturday morning. Her phone showed no missed calls and she couldn’t face the thought of getting up and facing the day. She had Jonty and the amber-eyed tiger from the pier for company but neither of them had much to say. Which was fine with her because she didn’t feel like talking. She felt like crying.

Jonty seemed to sense her mood. He lay on his stomach on his pillow, looking mournful. He rested his head on his front paws and every now and then he lifted his head as if to check on her before sighing and putting his head down again. She was positive she could read sympathy in his brown eyes but perhaps he was just bored and waiting patiently for a walk.

Eventually she gave in and got out of bed and pulled on her exercise gear. Last night she’d decided she needed to toughen up, she wasn’t going to fall apart because a man had changed his mind.

Jonty raced down the stairs eagerly the moment Abi tied the laces of her sneakers, and to make up for her lazy, self-indulgent morning she intended to take him for a long walk.

It was getting dark as she turned into her driveway later and she was startled to find a man leaning against her garage door. She panicked briefly until she recognised him.

Tall and dark, lean and gorgeous.

Damien.

Her heart rate continued to accelerate at the sight of him. ‘What are you doing here?’

‘I wanted to see you. I need to talk to you and you didn’t answer your phone.’

She’d left her phone behind for the walk. There hadn’t seemed to be any point in carrying a phone that never rang. ‘I thought you were busy with your wife and family.’

‘Ex-wife,’ he corrected. ‘Have you got a minute? I need your advice.’

He looked so desperate it was almost impossible to stay mad at him. Her heart wasn’t built to resist him. ‘You’d better come in,’ she sighed.

She made coffee and let Damien talk while she listened.

‘I’m sorry I didn’t let you know Brooke was in town. She honestly just appeared without warning. It took me by surprise and with Brooke the surprises are generally not pleasant. This time was no exception.’

‘What is she doing here?’ Abi asked, although what she really wanted to ask was, Where did she stay last night and what have you been doing?

‘She’s been offered a permanent role in the sitcom. She came to tell me she’s staying in New York.’

‘What does that mean for you and Summer?’ With one question Abi had got to the heart of the problem.

‘I don’t know. That’s what I wanted to talk to you about. I need to work out what my options are but I need to base my decisions on what is best for Summer. She is my priority and you are the person who knows us best. I need your opinion. I’ve always said I would do what’s best for Summer but it turns out I don’t know what that is,’ he admitted. ‘Is keeping her away from her mother the best thing? Or should I move to New York?’

Abi didn’t want to answer that question. She knew she couldn’t answer it without bias. She knew Damien had moved to LA because of Brooke and she’d been afraid that he would move again to keep his family together, but surely there had to come a time where he wouldn’t be manipulated by Brooke?

Abi knew she was thinking of her own interests as well when she answered but did that matter when she also believed she was thinking of what was best for Summer too? ‘Does Summer want to go?’

‘No.’ He shook his head and continued, ‘But she is five, she doesn’t get to decide.’

‘Has Brooke asked for Summer to go to New York?’

‘No.’

‘Then there’s absolutely nothing wrong with keeping Summer with you. Brooke has made no secret of the fact she doesn’t want a child. You’re not obliged to send Summer or to move you both. Let Summer visit her in New York. Better yet, make Brooke come here.’

‘We’ll have to come to some sort of official agreement if we’re living on opposite sides of the country. I’m not sure if the courts will give me sole custody.’

‘Well, then, you’ll just have to find out about all the hoops you’ll need to jump through to keep her and be prepared to start jumping. Child care will be the big thing but I imagine Brooke’s hours are as inconsistent as yours so as long as you make good arrangements for that you might be okay. You can afford child care but you’ll need something more permanent than sending Summer to Irma’s. After-school care only covers you for so long. It’s not a bad option, it gives Summer some interaction with other kids, but perhaps it’s not ideal every day. You’ll need a nanny or some organised care.’

‘Do you think I can manage on my own? Do you think that’s fair to Summer?’

‘Trust me, having one parent who loves her and puts her first is all she will need.’ Abi knew that she was speaking the truth this time, she had plenty of experience in that department. ‘You’re doing a fabulous job with her. You can do this.’

She knew she should have sent him on his way when she’d discovered him on her doorstep but she hadn’t been able to resist him. He still looked a bit overwhelmed by the situation but Abi knew he would work it out. He was an intelligent, sensible man and she hoped he made an intelligent, sensible decision.

She could forgive him for the past twenty-four hours, she could forgive him for putting Summer first. She could give him forgiveness but what did she get?

She wasn’t sure yet.

* * *

She was on tenterhooks for the next few days, waiting to hear what his decision was, but everything was quiet.

Every time there was a knock on her office door she found herself hoping that it would be Damien, bringing her the news she was desperate to hear, but each time she was disappointed.

And this latest interruption was no exception. There was a knock on the door and it opened to reveal Brooke. She was still in sky-high stilettos but she’d swapped the skinny jeans for a figure-hugging dress.

‘I’m sorry,’ she said. ‘I thought this was Damien’s office. I’m meeting him for lunch.’

Brooke was the last person Abi wanted to see. She’d been hoping for the news that Brooke had returned to New York but clearly that wasn’t the case. ‘He’s next door,’ Abi said, hoping to move her on, but instead she stepped into the room.

From her deliberate action and calm and measured manner Abi suspected she hadn’t mixed up the offices at all. She suspected that Brooke had orchestrated this meeting but what she wanted to know was why. Had she won the battle over Damien? The battle Abi hadn’t even realised they were having?

She wasn’t kept in suspense for long.

‘Seeing as you’re so close to Damien and Summer, I expect you’ve heard the news?’ Brooke said as she arched one finely plucked and expertly made-up eyebrow.

‘What news?’ Abi said, wishing as the words came out of her mouth that she’d kept quiet. She didn’t want to know any news that Brooke might want to impart. A sixth sense told her it could only mean bad news for her.

‘Damien and I are reconciling. He’s moving to New York.’

Abi’s stomach lurched. Too late she wished she’d pretended to be busy and sent Brooke on her way. Each word had felt like a punch she would never recover from. She felt ridiculous, naive, used and stupid. She’d given him her advice and her body. He’d asked her for advice but he hadn’t listened. She’d given herself to him but he hadn’t been honest with her. All she wanted was honesty.

She liked to think she was clever but she obviously wasn’t smart. Not worldly-wise. She was pathetic. When would she learn?

‘No, I hadn’t heard that.’ She wondered if Brooke was expecting her to congratulate her. If she was, she was going to be disappointed. Abi summoned up all her reserves and said, ‘If you’ll excuse me, I have patients to see. You’ll find Damien next door.’ She forced the words out and prayed that Brooke would go away and leave her alone.

She sank into her chair and watched Brooke leave, knowing she couldn’t compete. All she’d wanted was for Damien to find her attractive, but now that she’d met Brooke she realised there was no way she could measure up if Brooke was the type of woman he desired. Abi was far too different.

She put her head in her hands and let the tears flow. She was a fool. When would she learn?

‘Abi? Is everything okay?’

She looked up at the sound of her name to find Mila in her doorway.

‘What’s happened?’

Abi reached for a tissue and wiped her eyes. The tissue came away streaked with mascara.

‘It’s nothing,’ she said, as she threw the tissue in the trash.

Mila closed the office door. Was nobody going to leave her alone today? She wanted to lick her wounds in private but that wasn’t being terribly professional. Mila must have come to see her about Dylan. She hoped everything was all right.

‘Did you need to see me?’

‘I was in the clinic so I thought I’d just give you an update on Dylan but that can wait. Why don’t you tell me what’s wrong?’

‘It’s nothing, really. I just got some news that’s upset me but I’ll be fine. I just need a moment to get my head together.’

‘Is it Damien?’

‘Why do you say that?’

‘At our age it’s always men,’ she said, as she came and sat by Abi’s desk. ‘What’s he done?’

‘He hasn’t done anything yet but I think he’s about to break my heart.’ She sniffed and reached for another tissue. ‘It’s my own fault. Neither of us were ready for a proper relationship. I got ahead of myself.’

‘What do you mean?’

‘I had all these romantic notions but it seems he didn’t share them.’ They may not have talked about it but she had been building a fantasy in her head. A happily-ever-after where she and Damien got to spend the rest of their lives together, along with Summer and children of their own. It was a fantasy that had taken hold on the day they’d spent at the pier and she didn’t want to let it go. But it seemed she might have to. ‘Apparently he’s planning on moving to New York with his ex-wife.’

‘Really? He’s just told you this?’

Abi shook her head. ‘His ex has just paid me a visit. She told me.’

‘And you believe her?’

‘Why would she lie to me?’

‘I don’t know but I take it you don’t want to let him go?’

‘No.’

‘Does he know how you feel?’

‘No.’ Abi loved him but she was terrified of telling him. She was terrified that it would jinx everything, even though it seemed that everything was already ruined. She wasn’t about to humiliate herself further by telling him how she felt. ‘I can’t tell him I’ve fallen in love with him. I couldn’t bear to hear that he doesn’t love me.’

‘So you’re prepared to give him up?’

‘No.’

‘Then you have to tell him how you feel. You have to take the chance that his ex was lying to you. You have to take the chance that he feels the same way you do. You can’t let him go without questions. You’ll always wonder “what if.” Trust me, I’m speaking from experience.’

‘You’ve had your heart broken?’

Mia nodded. ‘In the worst possible way.’

‘Was it James?’ Abi knew instinctively that it was. It would explain all that tension she had felt between the two of them.

Mila nodded again. ‘James left me standing at the altar without an explanation and I have never found out why.’

‘You didn’t ask?’

‘I didn’t want to know at first but not knowing has stopped me from moving on.’

‘Why don’t you take your own advice? Why don’t you ask him now?’

‘It’s too late. There is no point in raking up the past. But it’s not too late for you. Don’t let him go without a fight. Don’t let him go without an explanation. You need to hear it from Damien’s lips.’

Mila was right. Abi felt betrayed and she deserved some answers. She deserved some honesty.

She waited until the end of the day to confront him. She didn’t want to run into Brooke again and she definitely didn’t want to run into Damien and Brooke together.

‘Can I speak to you?’ she asked, as she stepped into his office and closed the door. ‘I bumped into Brooke today. She told me you are getting back together.’ Abi didn’t give him an opportunity to speak. She needed to keep going, she needed to get her feelings out in the open before she lost her nerve. She paced up and down in front of his desk. ‘How can you be having that conversation with her and sleeping with me at the same time? You know how Mark’s lies and deception hurt me, you know what that did to me, and yet you’ve been sleeping with me and making plans with your wife behind my back.’

‘Ex-wife. She’s my ex-wife.’ Damien stood up and ushered Abi to a chair.

‘How could you do that to me? Do I matter so little?’

‘Abi, listen to me. I haven’t done anything that you’re accusing me of. When did you speak to Brooke?’

‘She came into my office before she met you for lunch.’

He frowned. ‘We didn’t have lunch. I haven’t seen her today.’

‘Do you think I’m making this up?’ Abi wasn’t sure who to believe, Damien or Brooke. She desperately wanted to believe Damien but she didn’t know if she should.

‘Of course I don’t.’

‘She was here,’ Abi insisted.

‘But she wasn’t here to see me. And we are not getting back together.’

‘You’re not?’

‘No. Why would you think that?’

‘You have moved before for Summer. You told me you moved here from San Francisco for that very reason. I thought you might have decided that it was best for Summer.’

‘I did it once before and it was a mistake. But do you think I would make this decision and not tell you myself?’

‘Brooke was very convincing.’

‘I don’t doubt that, she’s a very good actress,’ he said as he sat down opposite Abi. ‘She’s fooled me more than once. When I met her she was a drama student sporting a black eye. She told me she and another student had collided heads when they’d been rehearsing a fight scene. Then later she told me that it was actually from her boyfriend, that he’d hit her. She’d worked out by then that I had protective instincts. She told me he was abusing her and of course I believed her and came to her rescue.

‘The truth was that she saw me as someone who would be able to provide her with financial security while she pursued her career. I was a better bet than the actor she was dating plus I would be able to keep her looking good. Brooke is self-centred and narcissistic. Everything is about her. She doesn’t want to be a wife and mother, she wants to be a successful actress, and she has used me to get herself there.’

‘I thought you might not be able to resist Brooke. After seeing her, I couldn’t blame you.’

‘You’re kidding, aren’t you? What is under the surface is far more important. Believe me when I tell you there is absolutely nothing attractive about her.’

‘Why was she here today if it wasn’t to see you?’

‘She came to see James for some minor cosmetic surgery.’

‘James? Not you?’

Damien shook his head. ‘Not me. I won’t perform any more procedures on her.’

‘You’ve done some in the past?’

He nodded. ‘She’s had her nose narrowed,’ he said, and Abi felt a twinge of satisfaction. She’d been sure Brooke’s nose was too perfect to be natural. ‘She’s also had her lips enlarged and after she had Summer she wanted her breasts reshaped and enlarged. I did all that but I refused to do any more surgery once Summer turned three.’

‘Why?’

‘Summer was old enough then to be aware of changes to Brooke’s appearance. I didn’t want her asking why her mother was always changing her looks. I didn’t want her asking why I was changing Brooke’s appearance. Hollywood is a superficial place, I didn’t want to perpetuate the idea of physical beauty being the pinnacle of success to my own daughter, and that was the danger if I continued to operate on her mother. So I stopped.’

‘But why would she lie to me? What was the point?’

‘Think of it from her point of view. It’s always about Brooke. She wants to be the centre of attention. Summer has been talking about you and Brooke doesn’t want her attention on anyone else. She doesn’t want us but she craves attention. You have to trust me when I say Brooke is not part of my life. I moved on a long time ago.’

‘But that’s the point,’ Abi argued. ‘You might think you’ve moved on but she will always be part of your life because of Summer. You can’t cut her out but you need to decide how you want this to work. I can’t invest myself in us until you’ve worked out what you want. I want honesty and I’m not prepared to play Brooke’s games.’ She wasn’t sure she could handle her games or the additional stress.

Damien reached for Abi’s hands and pulled her out of the chair. He wrapped her in his arms as he said, ‘I have never lied to you and I promise I will work this out. I don’t want you to worry about Brooke. Leave her to me.’

Abi relaxed slightly but she doubted it was going to be as easy to deal with Brooke as he would have her believe. But she would give him some time and space to sort things out. She had to make sure he had done that before she could invest in the relationship; she had to be able to trust him.

Damien grabbed his car keys and headed for the door. He had some letters to dictate but he’d have to come back later and finish those—there were things that couldn’t wait. He was furious but he knew how to handle Brooke. She would have an agenda and he’d bet his last dollar that he knew what it was.

Brooke was lying on the sofa with an icepack on her forehead—the aftermath of her visit to James—when Damien got home, but at least she had collected Summer from school. He sent Summer to her room while he spoke to Brooke. He was still furious and he didn’t want Summer to hear this conversation.

‘What did you think you were doing at the clinic?’

Brooke lifted the ice pack from her forehead but didn’t sit up. Her unlined face was a picture of innocence as she asked. ‘What are you talking about?’

‘Did you think Abi wouldn’t tell me what you said? What game are you playing?’

‘It’s not a game. I want Summer with me and I didn’t think you’d let her go without you. Therefore, that means you will move to New York.’

‘I am not moving to New York and neither is our daughter.’ He knew she was just trying to make him angry so he would give her what she really wanted. He just had to find out what that was. ‘You don’t want us. You definitely don’t want me. I don’t think you ever did. Tell me what you really want. You know I’ll give it to you.’

He suddenly realised what she was after. Money and fame. It shouldn’t surprise him. That was always what it was about with Brooke. Nothing had changed. She wanted Summer with her so that Damien would fund her lifestyle. Two could play that game. ‘I won’t give you Summer. She is staying with me but she can visit. If you agree that Summer can stay here, I am prepared to help you with your rent. I want you to have somewhere nice when Summer comes to stay.’

He took a chance that appealing to Brooke’s avaricious nature would pay off. They would need to make some arrangements but he would do whatever was needed to ensure that Brooke didn’t cause more complications, and then he could work out how to fix things with Abi.