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Chapter 2

Schools

When it comes to school, there are abundant opportunities for educators to encourage progressive attitudes and introduce concepts that are anathema to Christian parents. Much of this occurs in the context of sex education classes, which we will discuss in all its troubling detail in chapter four. Aside from those classes, schools are busily promoting the acceptance of gay lifestyles, so-called “samesex marriage,” and gender fluidity. These topics can easily be woven into regular classes without parental knowledge or consent.

Long before same-sex marriage was legal in any state and years before Caitlyn Jenner was gracing magazine covers, my children’s school decided to put on an assembly for the elementary grades (kindergarten through fifth) called “Cootie Shots.” Billed as an anti-bullying program, it was in fact a series of skits intended to introduce concepts like same-sex marriage and transgenderism. The sketch called “In Mommy’s High Heels” speaks for itself. It was about a little boy who enjoyed dressing up like a girl.

That was bad enough. But the skit that we found most objectionable was called “The Duke Who Outlawed Jelly Beans.” The story goes like this. After a young duke is temporarily put in charge of a kingdom, he first outlaws jelly beans. Next, he decrees that since he grew up with a mother and a father, that living arrangement will be the only one allowed. That puts at risk the boy who lives with his grandparents, the girl who lives only with her mother, and of course, the girl who lives with her two mommies. As my husband and I explained to the principal, the real message of the skit wasn’t that people shouldn’t be bullied — it was that all living arrangements are equal. A girl, for example, could easily take from it the message that when she has a child it won’t matter whether there’s a father in the picture. We cited the “Hardwired to Connect” study conducted by the YMCA of the USA, Dartmouth Medical School, and the Institute for American Values that recommended, among other things, that “we reevaluate our behavior and our dominant cultural values, and consider a range of changes in our laws and public policies, in order substantially to increase the proportion of U.S. children growing up with their two married parents.”³⁵

Our stepping forward and speaking up was to no avail. The assembly went on as planned. But here’s the real kicker: The school did not intend for parents to know about the “Cootie Shots” assembly ahead of time. There was no announcement, no parental notification, no mention of it in any email blast. I happened to find out about it purely by accident and was able to inform a few like-minded friends. Thankfully we were able to have our kids skip it.

Given the fact that so-called “same-sex marriage” is now enshrined in law and that transgenderism is on a similar path to forced-acceptance, parents with children in private secular and public schools will be at a disadvantage. They’ll likely have little control over whether those issues are discussed or how they’re being presented. The fact is they may not even know if it’s happening.

Excluding Parents

Examples abound of schools purposefully keeping parents out of the loop when it comes to controversial issues. In Emmaus, Pennsylvania, the student body at Emmaus High School was shown a series of pro-LGBT videos.³⁵ Not only were parents not notified in advance, they weren’t allowed to see the videos after the fact! In California, parents are up against the “Healthy Youth Act,” passed in 2015, with two stated goals. As John Stonestreet writes at Breakpoint.org, the first is to “provide pupils with the knowledge and skills necessary to protect their sexual and reproductive health” from sexually transmitted diseases and unintended pregnancy. The second is “to give students ‘knowledge and skills’ to help them develop ‘healthy attitudes’ concerning ‘body image, gender, sexual orientation, relationships, marriage and family.’”³⁶

The law states that parents may “excuse their child from all or part of comprehensive sexual health education, HIV prevention education.”³⁷ Here’s the kicker: the law also states that parents are not allowed to excuse children from “instruction, materials, presentations, or programming that discuss gender, gender identity, gender expression, sexual orientation, discrimination … relationships or family.”³⁸ Many parents have missed that caveat, not realizing that they were not allowed to opt out of instruction related to gender ideology and sexual orientation. They made the mistaken assumption that they could opt out of all that’s normally thought of as sex ed. As Stonestreet writes, “[P]arents in California can opt their kids out of the anatomy but not the ideology.”³⁹

No More Dick and Jane

Even for the youngest students, school libraries aren’t what they used to be. By the time our children left elementary school, King and King was one of a couple books about homosexuality on the bookshelves. Aimed at children ages five to eight, according to Amazon, King and King tells the fictional story of a prince who marries a prince. My children could have stumbled across it on their own while visiting the library, or it could have been the librarian’s choice to read aloud one day.

There are now plenty of children’s books aimed at normalizing same-sex households. There’s Daddy, Papa and Me and Mommy, Mama and Me, both for kids three years old and up. King and King now has a sequel — King and King and Family — in which the married kings adopt a little girl while on their honeymoon. You get the idea. It’s quite likely such books are in your children’s elementary school library. There’s also nothing to stop a teacher from choosing such books for story time.

Let’s take a moment to make one thing clear: Christianity is about loving God and loving one’s neighbor. There is no place for bullying, mocking, or ridiculing others for any reason. That said, we are also obligated to live by God’s rules. In the Catholic Church, and in traditional Protestant denominations, the rules about sex and marriage are straightforward: sex is intended exclusively for marriage, and marriage is the union of one man and one woman. There is a counter-moral message in those seemingly sweet books meant, in theory at least, simply to promote tolerance and respect. This morality is not in accord with basic Christian teaching. For traditional Christians, exposing young children to such books undermines both religious and parental authority.

The same can be said for the new crop of children’s books on the topic of transgenderism. “Dyson loves pink, sparkly things. Sometimes he wears dresses,” is part of the Amazon description of My Princess Boy, written for children ages four through eight. There’s also I Am Jazz, the true story of Jazz Jennings who “from the time she was two years old … knew that she had a girl’s brain in a boy’s body.”⁴⁰ It’s also intended for children starting at four years old. Introducing Teddy, for children ages three through six, is about a teddy bear named Thomas who reveals to his friend that he’s really Tilly.

Much as LGBTQ activists and progressive educators would have us believe such books are aimed at helping children who are struggling with gender identity issues, for many parents — including Christians — it’s more complicated than that. First there’s the question of introducing the very idea to children. Dr. Michelle Cretella is a pediatrician, a Catholic mother of four, and president of the American College of Pediatricians. In an interview with me for National Catholic Register, she discussed the consequences of introducing the concept of transgenderism to young kids:

Most parents with little children are going to be confronted by this at some point, whether it’s in their public libraries, preschool or K-12 schools, just by virtue of the books that could be read to them. What is dangerous is that these young children are just developing the awareness of the fact that they are a boy or a girl. It’s not until age seven that most realize that is who they are and that sex doesn’t change. … Children will come to believe that their sex is whatever they think they want it to be. This is dangerous from a psychological point of view. It’s disrupting the natural process of gender identity formation.⁴¹

Dr. Cretella told me that it’s important that both parents and children understand that it’s our genes, our DNA, that determine our sex. Biological sex can’t be changed; it’s hardwired. Gender identity is what we feel and how we think about our biological sex. That, she says, is not hardwired. And around the age of seven, the idea of the permanence of biological sex is formed in a child’s cognitive development.

Thus, reading children books that say people can be whatever sex and gender they choose is encouraging a lie. And if this is reinforced by parents and medical professionals who “affirm” a child’s gender confusion, says Cretella, “the child will eventually be put on hormones that make him or her sterile, that harm bones, harm brain development, and increase the risk for stroke, diabetes and cancer over his lifetime.”

There are critics who think the traditional Christian point of view is intolerant and unsympathetic. The truth is, we can have sympathy for people — children and adults — who suffer from gender dysphoria without tolerating educators teaching our children falsehoods.

Transgender Truths

Dr. Paul McHugh is the University Distinguished Service Professor of Psychiatry at Johns Hopkins Medical School and former psychiatrist in chief at Johns Hopkins Hospital. Writing for The Public Discourse, McHugh cites a thirty-year follow-up study of sex-reassigned individuals in Sweden where, he points out, the culture is “strongly supportive of the transgendered.”⁴² The study found evidence of “lifelong mental unrest,” and suicide rates up to twenty times higher than for comparable peers. In other words, sex reassignment wasn’t an answer. “The treatment should strive to correct the false, problematic nature of the assumption and to resolve the psychosocial conflicts provoking it. With youngsters, this is best done in family therapy,” according to McHugh.

Walt Heyer has written extensively about transgenderism from a unique point of view: he used to be transgender. He agrees with McHugh that children who want to switch genders need intervention, not encouragement. Writing for The Daily Signal, Heyer says that by the age of four he wanted to be a girl.⁴³ He sought help from a gender specialist who told him the only way he’d find relief was by having gender reassignment surgery. And that’s what he did at the age of forty-two, living as Laura Jensen for eight years. “While studying psychology in a university program, I discovered that trans kids most often are suffering from a variety of disorders, starting with depression — the result of personal loss, broken families, sexual abuse, and unstable homes,” Heyer writes. “Deep depression leads kids to want to be someone other than who they are.” This resonated with Heyer. “Finally, I had discovered the madness of the transgender life. It is a fabrication born of mental disorders. I only wish that when I went to the gender counselor for help he would have told me I couldn’t really change genders, that it is biologically impossible.”

Gender Ideology in Schools

Parents at the Nova Classical Academy, a charter school in Minnesota, were confronted with the issue of transgenderism when the parents of a kindergarten boy insisted that he be treated as a girl by the school and his classmates. The school’s existing anti-bullying program wasn’t enough, they said. They wanted the issue addressed head on by, among other things, having the book I Am Jazz read in the kindergarten classroom. Some parents objected, and the student withdrew. His parents later sued the school for “allowing families to opt-out of classroom instruction on transgenderism, refusing to inform their son’s classmates of his ‘preferred’ gender pronouns, and not allowing a pro-transgender book to be part of the kindergarteners’ classroom instruction,”⁴⁴ according to a LifeSiteNews report. D.C. McAllister wrote about the case at The Federalist: “The child is a male who is confused about his gender. To play along with this psychological confusion instead of helping the child in a supportive and loving way to bring his thinking into alignment with reality is a form of child neglect, something no school should support.”⁴⁵

The parents of a six-year-old transgender girl successfully sued for discrimination when Eagleside Elementary school in Colorado wouldn’t allow him/her to use the girls bathroom. It wasn’t enough that they gave the child permission to use the restrooms in the teachers’ lounge and the nurse’s office. Similarly, the Nebraska School Activities Association now recognizes gender identity, rather than biological sex, as its standard for student athletes. The state’s Catholic bishops expressed disappointment in the decision and said they would continue to urge that the policy be rescinded. This joint statement by the bishops is worth noting:

Any person who experiences gender dysphoria is entitled to the respect that is the right of every human person, as well as genuine concern and the support needed for personal development and well-being. Such support, however, must be provided with due consideration to fairness; the safety, privacy, and rights of all students; and the truth about the human person.⁴⁶

At Rocklin Academy charter schools near Sacramento, over forty families pulled their children out of the school as the board continued to defend a transgender lesson presented in kindergarten that included reading the book, I Am Jazz, by transgender activist Jazz Jennings.⁴⁷ Several parents said their five-year-olds were traumatized, and that they weren’t notified beforehand. In Swampscott, Massachusetts, an elementary school principal announced that he was a woman and would now dress as a female. The Superintendent of Schools there has praised his “courage, honesty and transparency.”⁴⁸ Teachers in the state of Maine are now forbidden to inform parents if their children identify as transgender while in school.⁴⁹

Situations such as these will only increase as transgender rights take center stage in the culture. It will become increasingly difficult for parents not only to avoid having their children exposed to the idea of gender fluidity, but to avoid having it taught to them as gospel. Here’s what Archbishop Paul Coakley of Oklahoma City wrote in a column for the archdiocesan website on this issue:

Gender ideology is the next tsunami that threatens to sweep away centuries of accepted human wisdom about the complementarity and real differences between men and women. These differences are not merely about self-expression and personal choice. Science, philosophy, theology and the accumulated wisdom of every culture have recognized that these differences are rooted in something real and objective. They are rooted in biology, and, more fundamentally, they are rooted in the design of the Creator.⁵⁰

For parents who can afford it, many Catholic schools certainly offer a safer choice than public schools. But parents should still do their homework when choosing a school.

For example, Mercy High School in San Francisco, a Catholic girls college preparatory school, made the decision to allow a teacher who’d been at the school for four years to remain on staff, even as she “transitioned” to becoming a transgender man. Parents were sent a letter of explanation by the Sisters explaining that “we strive to witness to mercy when we honor the dignity of each person in a welcoming culture that pursues integrity of word and deed.”⁵¹ According to Daniel Guernsey of Crisis Magazine, the Sisters of Mercy also offered counseling “to help the students of the all-girls school accept the biologically female teacher’s new gender identity as a man.”⁵²

Although the Sisters maintain they are being merciful to the teacher, by accepting her rejection of her biological sex they are assenting to what Pope Francis has called a false “gender ideology.”⁵³ We could also question whether the decision is in the best interests of their students, which the sisters seem to at least tacitly acknowledge by their offer of counseling.

Daniel Guernsey is Director of K-12 Programs at the Cardinal Newman Society and writes that “the Vatican has taught for decades that Catholic school teachers are expected to uphold the Catholic faith in both word and deed.” He quotes Canon Law, which states that “teachers are to be outstanding in correct doctrine and integrity of life” (Canon 802.2). Guernsey believes bishops and Catholic school leaders need to formalize policies and procedures for dealing with such situations.⁵⁴

When speaking at the Shrine of Our Lady of Walsingham in Britain, Cardinal Raymond Burke addressed the difficulties facing Christian parents when it comes to education: “Today, parents must be especially vigilant, for sadly, in some places, schools have become the tools of a secular agenda inimical to the Christian life.”⁵⁵

Beyond Ideas

Schools normalizing ideas that run contrary to Catholic teaching is bad enough. But what about passing out condoms and emergency contraception? Think that’s far-fetched? Here are some stories straight out of the headlines.

By the mid-1990s over 400 high schools in the United States had begun to distribute condoms by request to students. In 2014, a school district in Oregon decided to offer condoms to students from sixth grade on up, with no parental consent required.⁵⁶ Sixth graders are generally between eleven and twelve years old!

The Los Angeles Unified School District asked Planned Parenthood to run a health clinic at one of its high schools.⁵⁷ Students are allowed — by law — to visit the clinic without the permission of their parents. And the clinic is allowed to give students emergency contraception, birth control, pregnancy tests, and screening for sexually transmitted diseases. All the services are free and confidential. It’s disconcerting to think that parents might get a call if their child requested an aspirin for a headache, but would have no clue if a nurse put her on birth control because she is sexually active.

Innocence Lost

In Massachusetts, thousands of students are asked to take The Massachusetts Youth Risk Behavior Survey every other year. Officially intended for high school students, the organization Mass Resistance claims that it’s been administered as early as sixth grade in some cases.⁵⁸ Parents aren’t even allowed to see the survey, and there’s no “opt out” provision.⁵⁹ As you’ll see from the questions below taken from the 2015 survey, there are many ways to shatter innocence.