Читать книгу Bigger Brother - Matthew Vandenberg - Страница 9

'My name is Gao,' Gao says. 'Don't get up. I don't want to sit on the sofa.'

Gao Yuan [1.] is squatting down in front of said sofa, her legs a figurative bow on her presence. No one can be certain about her identity because she's wearing a mouth mask, and - if we're nonetheless right - she's known for her pleasant and sincere smile [1.]. Her lips may as well be the labia majora and labia minora of a vulva given very little is known about them at present. Perhaps nerves will be fully tested if the mask is removed. Surely she has the sensation that she's being watched, but she could become such sensation, and the removal of the mask could cause another, so sensations become so common that air itself becomes orgasmic. In short, the nerves of the clitoris [2.] are sadly as overlooked as Gao's identity. It's like women drew short straws they can't find.

Matt and Sayuri are sitting on opposite ends of the sofa.

'I'm Sayu'li*,' Sayuri says, with a friendly wave.

'I'm Matt,' Matt says, also with a wave, but also with a smile that he hates is the most obvious one in the room. 'It's safe to breathe through my nose, right? I'm starting to wonder. Is this a gas chamber?' - he looks at Sayuri and then Gao.

Sayuri shakes her head, but with a smile coming out to play Go, and her sweet territory takes the atmosphere by storm.

'It's safe,' Gao says. 'But I can't let viewers figure out who I am.'

'So your name's not Gao then?' Matt asks.

'Call me Gao,' Gao says. 'And call me Chinese, and a strong woman.'

'In a weird way, you both remind me of women in Bondi,' Matt says. 'Noses are covered up [3.] like lips like vulvae, and no one wants their original noses to be seen, as special as they certainly are as they are. But so many women care for fake noses: plastic noses, minds, and money over a plastic medium that's simply words. However, to exercise your heart [4.] and lungs [4.] you need only take deep breaths through your original nose. You'll sleep [4.] and think [4.] better too.'

'You should move more when you talk and are somewhat sitting down,' Gao says, jigging about. 'Or you'll damage your spine [5.]. And there are no plastic spines to buy. Sorry.'

Matt smiles again: 'Smart.'

'Be careful talking to Matt, Gao,' Sayuri says. 'He likes vi'luses too much. Or going vi'lal at least.'

'You know, microbes - like viruses - can either get along with one another [6.] or compete with one another [6.], inside our very own bodies,' Matt states. 'There are so many viruses that are still undiscovered [6.], and the way they might interact with one another [6.] is obviously also unknown. Maybe we're all like viruses ourselves, getting to know one another in the body of a Big Brother house. Maybe cooperation is good [6.], but maybe competition is too [6.]. But think big, because tiny viruses die when it's hot [6.] anyway.'

'Exactly,' Gao says, nodding. 'I'm told I will speak to Uighurs here. Hence why I'm wearing a mask. I'm Han Chinese from the Xinjiang province, and we don't usually talk to these people the people in power deem outsiders, if not terrorists [7.]. But I know that the vast majority of them are just poor farmers [7.]. Journalists can't speak to them either [7.], so I guess you could call me a reporter emerging from a fire of a country to speak with underdogs underground in this secret location. Usually there is a vast desert [7.] separating us. Or maybe they're locked away in camps because they like their traditions [8.] and religion [8.] a little too much. So, you could say that they're the REAL hidden mouths. Mouth masks are the Chinese government.'

'They're probably like innocent civilians in El Salvador who happen to live on, rather than not, a gang's turf,' Matt says. 'They make far less money [10.], and certainly don't work for the big firms [10.]. Maybe the main - central if you will, speaking of the Americas - issue here is that money is collected by the wrong people [10.]. Money should flow to people in charge, but only should those people genuinely improve the living conditions for the normal people they should be caring for, otherwise ordinary citizens should be able to shop around for a better government. Also, very few government officials and company directors in Uganda pay personal income tax [9.]. But should they? If the government officials are breaking the rules anyway, then how can they be trusted to do the right thing with money from taxes they don't even believe in paying themselves, in practically paying themselves generously to do nothing by default.'

'That begs the question: who do we pay rent to?' Gao asks, rhetorically. 'All that a government invests in - like people watching themselves like they're expecting company (like pregnant guests and figures) to be assembled here, for instance - should be completely public. If the shares in whatever a government invests in decline in value over time, that means that the people are not happy with this particular investment. And if enough people are not happy and want to sell their shares, then they should be allowed to - which is actually democratic tax avoidance. Essentially, what this all means is that vulvas should be phenomenal like public figures. There should be less focus on pregnancy and more on pleasure worldwide. Taxes should be paid with and for pleasure to dampen consumer spending for good. Think about it. If the camps the Uighurs are held in are meant to be for empowerment then vulvae should be worshiped to the extent that women can easily describe what they have seen. Personal income tax should indeed be personal, with the whole body in mind. A personal income tax on good for good. It's personal for those in power, because they spend it on themselves, but this should be for educational purposes. Use of income tax that's personal should be monitored like Uighurs so that one day female Uighurs and Ugandans can get married and live a life seriously free from repression.'

'Wow,' Matt says. 'True. Totally. And who DO we pay rent to?' - Matt looks up at the glass ceiling.

'Right hands, hopefully, should be promoted, like we're in India, but not at the expense of left hands for writing [12.],' Gao says. 'Ships' right hands can sleep at night if money ends up in the right hands, like Chinese ships' right hands in Australia [11.]. Promotion of this in India could encourage Chinese and Indian tourists to find themselves in Australia if they need a right hand with physically finding themselves. That's beyond mental, sure, but they can use their left hand now. (The reason for any numbness is what we should wake up to. Relieve stress). And that's how they eat tonight: out like a light. We're coming back to sleep now like we were going nowhere, but now dreaming of population growth outside Asia, but dreaming of Asians. Note that the vulva needs the right hands. We haven't gone carefully through this yet. Ships sink because of loose lips but that's how people get wet. Don't just think about it, talk about taxing work appropriately, even though it's hard. That's a reason why it should pay off. Relaxation should be universal, and a tax should be an insurance against overworking. Hands should be clean.'

Gao's falling asleep.

So's Matt.

It's night.

They're gone.

_____________________

*Japanese speakers: 'th' as 's'; 'r' as 'l'; no 'of'

_____________________

References

1 Daily Mail Australia, Female Chinese soldier stuns millions after appearing at the military parade to mark the nation's 70th anniversary, https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-7529221/Female-soldier-stuns-millions-appearing-Chinas-National-Day-parade.html

2 New Scientist, Misunderstanding the vulva may be leading to pain after labiaplasties, https://www.newscientist.com/article/2228249-misunderstanding-the-vulva-may-be-leading-to-pain-after-labiaplasties/ ["Basic anatomical research on the clitoris has lagged behind that of the penis, [Paul Pin] says."; "They found that the nerves responsible for sensation and orgasm ranged from 2 to 3 millimetres in diameter, similar in size to the nerves running along the shaft of the penis and in the index finger."]

3 THE ESTABLISHMENT, The Insidious Reasons Doctors Are Botching Labiaplasties, https://theestablishment.co/the-insidious-reasons-doctors-are-botching-labiaplasties/index.html, ["...Michael Goodman...estimates that “well over a thousand” women suffer from botched labiaplasties each year. This number will likely grow, as labiaplasty is the world’s fastest-growing cosmetic surgery, seeing a 45% increase in 2016 alone."; "But while she acknowledges that unrealistic beauty standards led her to get the surgery, she points out that other forms of surgery are held to higher standards, regardless of the patient’s motives. “If vulvas got the same standard of care as noses, I’d be happy,” she says."]

4 New Scientist, How to breathe your way to better memory and sleep, https://www.newscientist.com/article/mg24532640-600-how-to-breathe-your-way-to-better-memory-and-sleep/, ["The upshot of all this is that nose breathing adds 50 per cent more air resistance than breathing through the mouth. That gives your heart and lungs a workout and increases the vacuum in your lungs, which allows you to draw in up to 20 per cent more oxygen than breathing by mouth."]

5 New Scientist, Discover how to sit to dodge the dangers of inactivity, https://www.newscientist.com/article/mg24532640-600-discover-how-to-sit-to-dodge-the-dangers-of-inactivity/, ["So what's the best way to sit? Bettany-Saltikov has found that kneeling or using a stool with a saddle seat can help keep the spine in a better position – as does squatting. We might also take inspiration from traditional cultures like the Hadza. "Use a variety of postures and preferably not just still postures but some which allow movement," says physiotherapist Leon Straker at Curtin University, Australia."]

6 New Scientist, The zombie world of viruses could hold the key to evolution itself, https://www.newscientist.com/article/mg24532640-700-the-zombie-world-of-viruses-could-hold-the-key-to-evolution-itself/ ["...the length of time viruses can remain viable outside their host varies hugely. Some survive only seconds while others can persist for decades. Temperature is a big factor. In very hot environments, viruses tend to die quickly..."; "A new field of study known as viral ecology is providing insights into the interactions between viruses and their hosts...Our bodies contain hundreds of different cell types – including those that make up our complex immune systems and that constantly try to fight off alien organisms – all of which interact with the thousands or even millions of types of viruses and bacteria in our microbiome. Add the fact that these microbes can both help and compete with one another...and the number of possible interactions might as well be infinite."]

7 The Economist, Leaders, Apartheid, Chinese Style, Dismantling China’s Muslim gulag in Xinjiang is not enough, https://www.economist.com/leaders/2020/01/11/dismantling-chinas-muslim-gulag-in-xinjiang-is-not-enough, ["Many have almost no interaction with Uighurs. About one in six people in Xinjiang, most of them Han Chinese, live in separate communities...[with their] own police, hospitals, newspapers and television stations. It dominates Xinjiang’s agriculture. This includes the production of tomatoes and cotton, for the harvesting of which the bingtuan uses casual Han labour brought in from other parts of China....Such a system is bound to foster resentment. Geography compounds the problem. The bingtuan’s biggest settlements are in the north. An immense desert separates them from the oasis towns of the south, where the Uighurs, mostly poor farmers who struggle to compete with the bingtuan’s huge agricultural schemes, are mainly concentrated."; "It is hard to assess such claims in a region where foreign reporters are kept under surveillance and ordinary people are afraid to talk to strangers."]

8 The Economist, China, A report from Xinjiang, Many Han Chinese don’t mind the gulag for their Uighur neighbours, https://www.economist.com/china/2020/01/11/many-han-chinese-dont-mind-the-gulag-for-their-uighur-neighbours, ["Han people mainly live in the north where Urumqi is located. Uighurs are concentrated in the much poorer south, in ancient oasis towns such as Kashgar and Hotan."; "Uighurs are put in camps for such things as being overtly pious Muslims or too fond of their Uighur traditions."]

9 The Economist, Middle East and Africa, Taxing Times, African governments are trying to collect more tax, https://www.economist.com/middle-east-and-africa/2020/01/11/african-governments-are-trying-to-collect-more-tax, ["Data from the oecd for 26 African countries show that over half of their tax revenues come from taxes on goods and services. Only a quarter comes from personal income tax and social-security contributions (about the same as in Latin America, but much less than in the rich world)."; "When Ugandan tax collectors examined records for 71 government officials in 2013/14, they found that just one had paid any personal income tax. Only 5% of directors at leading companies were paying income tax themselves."]

10 The Economist, Graphic detail, The wrong side of the tracks, A new study suggests that street gangs inflict broad economic harm, https://www.economist.com/graphic-detail/2020/01/11/a-new-study-suggests-that-street-gangs-inflict-broad-economic-harm, ["Respondents who lived on gang turf reported less than half the income of those outside. They were also less likely to say they worked outside their neighbourhoods or for large firms, which might explain why they were poorer."]

11 SBS News, Australia, Two foreign ships banned from Australian ports after wage theft, https://www.sbs.com.au/news/two-foreign-ships-banned-from-australian-ports-after-wage-theft

12 Smithsonian Magazine, Two-Thirds of the World Still Hates Lefties, https://www.smithsonianmag.com/smart-news/two-thirds-of-the-world-still-hates-lefties-64727388/