Читать книгу Faith in the Journey - Michael Cohen - Страница 7

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So here is where the story takes off, where and how Jana became part of my life. Let’s start off in my junior year. This was the beginning changes to my life that helped shaped the future. For starters, let’s talk about high school. Barnegat was a small town, but it was not alone in being a small town. There were several small towns around the area. So instead of many high schools, there was one made to hold so many students. Some of the towns still had space for the elementary and middle schools to call their own. But for us, it was only Southern Regional High, a.k.a. the Fighting Rams. There were things that stood out in that school, some of it ahead of its time. Along with the regular required classes, the school would do an extra class.

The idea was to take the basic, math, English, history, science, and gym and fill in the extra class with what they would call an elective class. There was a computer class that was for juniors and seniors. Of course, that made it one of the most popular classes. Added with computers was home economics, advanced math, art class, science, and creative writing class. Most classes were set before the school would start, and the plans were made before the first day of class. I wanted computers, easy as it was, but it filled up quickly. The other classes filled quickly too. Only two classes were available for me to choose. home ec or science, and yet I chose the one where most of the guys wouldn’t dare to go. I picked home ec and was so happy about this easy class. This is when Mr. Smith comes into play.

For home ec, most people think of a woman teaching this class. Nope, it was taught by Mr. Smith. Anything to make school easier was a welcome thing to me. Oh don’t get me wrong, I love school, and enjoyed learning, but it was a lot to do at the time, a lot of pressure to know more, to be ready for the world, and to do it under a strict school budget.

Okay, Mr. Smith story. Mr. Smith’s first name was Roger, but everyone knew him as Mr. Smith. He is an imposing kind of guy. He is almost seven feet tall, matched with his buzz haircut. He usually is in a dress shirt and pants, but everyone that knew him knew he had tattoos from his time in the military. Yes, Mr. Smith is an ex-military, was in the army. He had served several tours in the Middle East. Of course this was before 9-11 happened. When he got out, he went to school and studied teaching. Now he is a teacher who knows how to connect with the students. Maybe it had to do with his time in the army or that his wife shaved the rough edges that he had. I don’t know, but everyone in school knew him. He was part of almost everything in school relations. He did field trips to Philly and helped coached some of the sports. He also taught chess club, which he was really good at. This home ec class was going to be his second year running it. You can say he learned from his first go-around and knew that it would be more involved with life than just baking cookies.

The first day of class was spent learning about what we were doing and our parents for the year. Mr. Smith felt unlike last year, two people working together will help things along. He also paired up the partners with another pair of partners. Small groups working together tend to have the best results. Then he called out the names of the pairs. I heard my name and looked around some of the women to see who I was lucky to pair up with. “Michael Williams, you are pairing up with Jana Carter,” Mr. Smith announced. I heard of Jana but never met her. I also heard her being called the church girl due to her father. I had not noticed her in the room, but then again, I never really saw her. I only remember the long brown hair from the back and how she had a conserved look. Mr. Smith had us get up and introduce each person.

So it was my turn. Jana had stood up, right behind me. I turned to my side to greet her, and somehow, I tripped over my bag. It must have fell off my chair. I took a tumble and found myself on the ground. First thing I saw was her brown flats and matched with her jean pants. I turned my head up toward her and saw her eyes looks right down at me. I literally fell for Jana at that moment. The love would come later, but this is the moment I wish to live in forever. My eyes saw right at her gray hazel eyes. They reminded the ocean, deep and passionate. Jana helped me up and joked about falling over her. I dusted myself of and introduced myself. “Hi I am Michael Williams.”

Her responds was, “Hi, Michael, I am Jana Carter, your partner for the year.” Once all the pairs were set up, Mr. Smith then assigned us into groups of another pair. Jana and I were paired with Eric and Tammy. It would seem that all the pairs were a bit interesting, but Mr. Smith had his reasons.

To end the class, we wrote down our likes and dislikes, followed up with talking about them with our table. It is funny how things like this have an impact on us all. I remember how I felt seeing Jana for the first time. I remember the nerves and thankfulness for being at the table with Eric. I knew him from classes that we took. He was one of the few people that expressed himself with his poems and art. He also knew football. Giants fan, he was, but I let that go. Tammy and Jana were both a mystery. Tammy was new, just moved from Easton, Pennsylvania, in the summertime. Fun fact that was shared by our group, all but me went to the same church. More important for them was the fact I didn’t go to church anymore. As class was getting ready to let out, I had to explain that one. It was simple, I went when I was young because my dad believed that I need to go. I never understood God or the reason for the church or Bible.

At fourteen, my dad gave me a choice to go or not, and well, I chose not to go anymore. Eric said, “Hey, buddy, I can help you with that. I mean God is beyond words but not beyond understanding.” I thought about it, but I was not too interested in it. I mean I knew of God, but just how to live a life in following him was something I didn’t agree with. Of course, I learn more about God and the many things of the Bible. Tammy began to speak about it when the bell rang, and it was time to go. Eric gave me his number, joined in by Tammy and Jana. The idea was simple, we stay in touch when not in school. When we all left that room, I didn’t know that my world would change for the better. I didn’t know that I would know love in its purest form.

With the class done, I went right to the locker room to change for practice. Throughout the rest of the day, I couldn’t shake this curiousness about Jana, like those times when you just get something in your head and can’t stop thinking about it. When I got home, my dad was still at work. Since high school started, he works later, and I fend for myself. I learned to handle myself; well, Linda taught me somethings and still checks up every so often. I showered, cleaned up my room, and hopped on the TV. Cable was the big thing, and well, my dad still was using basic channels. That left me with thirteen channels to watch, which is not much on TV. I had a Nintendo system, so I made the choice to play some Zelda. I had been beating the game several times but just loved playing the game. Strange it may be, my dad made good money, but he never bought the big stuff like big TV or the latest system or even cable. He felt it was waste of money and that money could better to be served to other places. After some time, my stomach started to rumble. Time to eat something for dinner. I didn’t have mad cooking skills, but I did a good grilled cheese with ham. My night ended with watching some Star Trek: Deep Space Nine.

The first couple of days in class, we all spent time learning about one another. Mr. Smith had us write a report of what we wanted to be when we finished high school or college. My story was simple. I wanted to go play football at Notre Dame, in part to honor my grandpa and my dad and ’cause they are the best team. Once I did football for the four years, yes, I would stay all four years to finish my degree in sports science, I would do the NFL draft. When football is done, I retire in Barnegat and coach the kids. It seemed simple and easy to me, yet not to a lot of other people, not so much.

We all learned that Eric wanted to go to NYU and do plays for Broadway in the city of New York. He felt that was the best way to take his artistic eye and show it to the world in play form. Tammy was simple, go to college for business and work up the ladder on one of the Fortune 500 companies. She wanted to be the change in the world for others. Jana was not surprising, but then again, she kind of was. For her, it was about doing the college root and studying youth ministry. She wanted to help the kids who had special needs and those who need just a bit of understanding. Then the talk shifted to marriage and kids. I guess my idea was a bit different. I never really thought about that stuff, didn’t think I needed to yet. Eric wanted the New York life, apartment in the city, kids knowing the city, and a wife that would be like him. He was one of a kind guy. Tammy didn’t have much to say either about marriage or kids. She wanted to focus on her career and deal with the rest after she was at least thirty. Jana had the same idea since she was little—good husband, who loves deep and passionate, many kids to match the big house she wanted. It got real for the moment there.

I looked at Jana and just saw her glace at me; something about it spoke to me. For a couple more weeks, we researched the jobs, the colleges, and other things we need to live in our reported life. This was his way of getting us prepared for the world. It was helpful to learn about the costs of things, to know some things are not free as they talk about on TV. All of us knew college was not cheap, but to learn that there were places there were very high on cost and others much low than we thought. Some research shows some of those high cost colleges didn’t work out so much for people, such as jobs and not having the raise in pay as they thought. We also learned some schools were not worth the time, including accreditation. For me, that the school that had no accreditation was worth the paper we signed on. I admit I was blown away by all these stuff, and it had me thinking about my choice.

I had applied to Notre Dame already, but now I was looking for other places. My football would give me a shot in some schools. Jana got our table more surprised with her pick of college, and the setup was sweet. She had applied at Barclay College and was accepted. It is a small place in Kansas, in a town of Haviland. We all had to look that up and really had to look for it. Even the maps in school didn’t have the town, not much to see at that part. She called it her little haven for her life. From the pictures, it reminded me of an old school from like the fifties. The gym was smaller, and I thought of the movie Hoosiers in how it looked. It’s funny, looking at the place had me thinking about it more and more. The one sticking point for it was a Christian college. That was something that I didn’t quite wrap my head around.

Our little group was spending more time together. At one football game, I spotted Eric and Tammy in the stands. I was looking to see if my dad made this game. I knew he worked, and most of the time, he can’t make my games, but I still looked for him anyway. As much as I wanted my dad there, I knew I needed to stay focused on the game. We were playing Little Egg Harbor. They were a tough team to crack. Their best player was the quarterback named Jim Bell. He was also a rare left-handed thrower. Rumor was he was being scouted in this game by schools like Rutgers, Penn State, and Boston College.

So for any of us, it was also a time to shine, a chance to get a look and possible interests from the schools. I looked one more time in the stands. I didn’t know why I bothered, but I guess something was in play that night. I happened to catch out of the corner of my eye Jana. She had her hair done and looked quite beautiful. So much so that I lost my head, well my ears, when the coach called for me. My teammate Joe had to hit me upside the head to get me back. My number was being called, and I needed to shine for the crowd. It was a simple play of running to my left, finding the hole in the offensive line, and looking to race down the field. But I noticed that I was not the only one to see my play as I saw the other team shifting over to the left. Their middle linebacker was getting ready to hit the hole. I saw if I ran that why, he would stop me short, and we would have lost yards. I moved to Ben, the quarterback, and keyed him on it. Ben saw the same thing, and we switched the shift to the right. He called, “Hut, hut, blue 24, hut, hike.” Middle linebacker moved to cover the left, but I moved to the right. The offensive opened a hole on the end of the line, letting me burst right through it. The switch caught the other team off guard, and I was racing to the endzone—touchdown.

There is a thrill to see that moment and race to the end for a score. I was cheering with all my teammates, yet I was looking back in the stands. Then I lost my breath. In the front row, clapping, was my dad. He had seen the play. Seeing him smile and cheer me on was a feeling I have not had since I was little. I was hyped up for the rest of the game. After the shower and changing clothes, I met my dad outside the gym. “I want to take you to your favorite place. There is something I need to tell you,” my dad said. He had me interested and worried at the same time. I knew his job was promoting people. My dad had applied for the promotion for a job here, but I also heard that some of those jobs were in other areas of Jersey, and some were in other states.

We got there rather quickly, and even our order was done quickly. I braced myself to hear whatever was coming. So the news was somewhat true. My dad was promoted up to manager of the local office. It meant that he would be staying close to home. He also said his hours were going to be a basic nine to five schedule. It also meant that he was going to my games and other stuff. He knew it was important to be there, especially since he had to represent mom too. The rest of the night was talking and just having father-son bonding time.

In the next school day, we all were talking about how Jana was at the game. It was a big deal since she almost never goes to a sporting event. If she did, she kept well hidden. Sure enough, she walked in, and everyone went quiet. As she walked over to the table, Mr. Smith met her and said, “Thank you for being at the game for my mom.” It turned out that she was there helping Mr. Smith with his mom. She loves football, and that night, Mr. Smith had to be somewhere else for school; therefore, Jana volunteered to help out. The way I looked at her caught the attention of Eric, who joked about having loving eyes. Even Tammy joined in on the joking around. I wouldn’t say I was in love with Jana, but I knew I was interested in her more. There was something about her; it just made me think about her more. Mr. Smith then called out for our homework, which took my mind off of Jana. With school and classes on the way, my mind always shifted toward football at the end of the day.

I would like to say we finished the season as champs, but we lost in the first round of the playoffs against Lacey Township. The Lions were a tough team to beat this year. Years past there were generally a pushover, but that was before their star defense back. Anytime a player like Danny came around, football players took notice. He was also one of the first non-DL or LB to make an impact for us to respect his play but also study his playing time. While losing is not always fun, we had an end-of-the-year party and celebrated the seniors for a great season. All that meant Christmas was coming up, and I was not always in the mood for the Christmas cheer. It’s nothing personal, just it was never a big holiday with my dad and me.

I guess that had to do with my mom passing. She was the spirited one, always decorating the house with holiday things. She always baked food that made the house smell so good. Sometimes walking, I be hungry from just the smell of pies baking. This year felt like the last couple, nothing was going to really happen. I credit my dad for trying his best, but he was not Mom. Even the presents were simple because of his work. Yet this year was already different. With my dad’s promotion, it meant possible homemade dinner; though I guess what it should be. Usually Linda would come over to drop off some Christmas food. It was always yummy. This season was going to be better and a start of something new. I didn’t know it at that time, but this was the season things changed for the better.