Читать книгу Midnight in the Desert Collection - Оливия Гейтс - Страница 61

“THAT must have been a shock to you.” A really unpleasant one, too.

Remembering back to their breakup, she knew how important sexual innocence had been to Asad. Probably still was. Iris hadn’t realized it when they were dating, but when he told her it was over he’d made a lot of things clear that had been hazy before that. Like the fact that Iris could never be in the running for Asad’s future wife because she’d had a sexual partner before him.

Even now, with their friendship firmly intact, she couldn’t think of Darren as a former lover. There had been no love in the loss of her virginity. Not even on her part.

Iris had thought Asad’s attitude pretty much prehistoric, but her opinion hadn’t counted. And he’d walked away to marry the not-so-perfect Badra.

“She was also pregnant.”

“What? Nawar isn’t yours?” Iris asked in shock. But there was no doubting the bond between the beautiful little girl and her father.

“She is mine,” Asad fiercely contradicted. “Though she carries none of my genetic makeup, Nawar is in all ways that count my beloved daughter.”

“But that’s.” Unbelievable.

Or kind of funny in a gallows-humor kind of way. Not that his daughter didn’t share his gene pool, but because of the way he’d rejected Iris so completely based on her lack of innocence. Only, Iris had been way more virginal in the ways that counted than the already-pregnant Badra. That was for sure.

But mostly, the whole situation with Badra seemed really, really sad. She’d deceived Asad and Nawar had been made a pawn in a marriage paved with bad intention before she’d ever been born.

“I’m sorry.” Iris really, really was.

“Do not be. The one good thing I got out of my marriage to Badra was my precious gem, Nawar.”

Iris liked hearing that; it gave her confidence that under the more cynical and dour exterior, Asad was still the same man who had once really been her best and truest friend. His willingness to share what had to be his deepest secret with her showed that regardless of the intervening years of silence, he still saw her in that light.

“Nawar said you named her.”

“Badra had no interest in parenting from the very beginning. Though at the time, I believed she allowed me to name Nawar to make her more my own. I was wrong about that, just as I had mistaken so much about Badra. At first I believed Badra’s lack of interest in my daughter was due to her shame at bearing another man’s child. I told her repeatedly how much I loved Nawar. That I did not resent her.”

“That’s kind of amazing.” And so not what Iris would have expected of the arrogant, proud man.

She’d loved Asad, but she hadn’t been blind to his faults. Or so she had believed. Perhaps she’d been blinder to more things than even their subsequent break-up had forced her to accept.

“I was not there for the birth, as is the custom of our people, but my grandmother brought the babe to me when she was less than an hour old. I looked down into her beautiful little face and fell in love.”

Emotion caught in Iris’s throat. “She’s very lucky to have you for a father.”

“I am far more blessed to have her as a daughter.”

Iris thought maybe it was a draw, but forbore saying so.

“I named her flower after the one woman I knew had more honor than my wife ever would.”

The import of Asad’s words finally registered and Iris gasped in shock. “You named your daughter after me. That’s not possible.”

“I assure you, it is. Though at the time I was unaware of what my brain had done. I only realized it later, but then so did Badra. When she did, it infuriated her. We fought about it and rather than deny it like I should have because I was totally unaware of having done it, I told Badra I wanted Nawar to share your sense of honor, not her mother’s.”

“That’s …” Iris didn’t know what to say. How did you answer a statement like that? “I guess I’m glad to know you think I have strong character.”

“I do, very much so. It made you a good friend and trustworthy lover.”

There was no denying his words. The trust he was showing in her now matched what she had given him the night before, when she’d shared her past shame with him. It came to Iris then that Asad had not realized what he would lose when he dumped her, or how much he would miss her. Another tiny bit of her shattered heart mended at that knowledge.

“Unless I want a distant cousin to take my place, I will have to marry again.”

Well, that came out of the blue and frankly, Iris could have lived without that reminder. Nevertheless, she said, “Yes.” And then the import of what he’d said hit her. “Badra intended to stick you with another man’s child. What if Nawar had been a boy?”

“He would have been the next sheikh of my people. Nawar’s husband may well be my successor.”

Iris believed him. And again … wow. This man was everything she’d believed him to be and then convinced herself he wasn’t, and so much more.

Asad loved his daughter, and he would have loved a son just as well. That was the kind of man he was. Asad had honor and character to spare. Even if at one time she’d maybe thought he didn’t.

“So Badra told you she was pregnant?”

“Only after I figured it out for myself, the day after our wedding.”

Their honeymoon must have been a treat, Iris thought rather sarcastically and then felt bad for thinking at all. Poor Asad.

“Whoever I marry must accept Nawar as completely as I do.”

“Of course.”

He smiled, as if happy with her answer. The man did have a rather well-developed need, or maybe expectation, that the people around him would agree with his opinion. Not that he was great at compromise, or anything. He just liked knowing everyone thought he was right.

Arrogant sheikh. She smiled.

“What is that expression on your face?”

“I’m smiling.”

“I am aware.”

“That’s not exactly a rare occurrence.”

“Less common than I remember from six years ago.”

“I could say the same.”

He shrugged and then pulled her into his arms through the water. “The responsibilities of my position have tempered my humor.”

And maybe learning his perfect princess was anything but had robbed Asad of some of his joy in life. Not that Iris expected him to ever admit it.

She let herself relax against him, enjoying this intimacy almost as much as what they’d shared earlier. “You said that Badra died in a plane crash with her lover. Did she leave you?”

“No. She traveled with him several times a year.”

“And you put up with it?” Iris asked in shock, turning around to face him, water sloshing over the sides of the pool from her agitated movements.

“I had full control of Nawar’s raising. This was the important thing. Badra signed away parental rights to my daughter in exchange for five years of me funding her lifestyle and accepting her choices therein.”

“Five years?” Iris asked faintly.

“Yes. I would have divorced Badra a year ago if she were not already dead.”

“But that’s medieval.”

“It was necessary. She could have taken my daughter and I could not allow it.”

So he’d bought rights to her daughter. “There were other ways.” There had to have been.

“None that guaranteed Nawar, my little jewel, stayed with me here among the Sha’b Al’najid whom she loved and who loved her just as fiercely.”

“So you gave up five years of your life for her.” He really was the most amazing man ever.

“I was prepared to, yes.”

“You’re a Superman, you know that?”

“I am glad you think so, but you did not believe this six years ago.”

“Oh, I did. Just not after you dumped me.” She took a deep breath and let it out. “But that’s in the past. I don’t want to talk, or even think about it anymore. Okay?”

“As you wish. The present is enough to keep us both fully occupied.”

She believed he was right about that.

“You slept with him,” Russell whispered in cheeky accusation as they completed their first set of measurements at the initial sampling site.

Iris’s head snapped around. “Shhh … I don’t know why you’d say that anyway.”

She wasn’t going to deny it. Iris was a terrible liar, but admitting she was sleeping with the man who’d broken her heart once wasn’t going to make her look all that smart to her colleague.

“Give it a rest, cupcake. It’s all there in his eyes.”

“What’s in his eyes?” she couldn’t help asking, though she knew she shouldn’t.

The look on Russell’s face said he knew he’d gotten her. “At the palace, and since, he’s watched you with this really intense yearning.” He frowned, sadness entering his gaze. “It’s an expression I understand too well not to recognize.”

Iris reached out and squeezed his arm in silent comfort. Russell’s ex-girlfriend had really done a number on him. And knowing how deeply Asad’s defection had affected her, Iris wasn’t about to dismiss Russell’s love affair gone wrong as a youthful mistake he would get over easily.

“He’s not looking at you like that now, though,” Russell claimed, his voice cheerful, the look of sadness gone.

She waited several seconds for her nosy colleague to explain, but he just went back to work. Finally, in exasperation, she asked, “How does he look at me, then?”

“Like you’re his and anyone thinking to challenge that claim had better protect his balls.”

She burst out laughing, but the man who wore T-shirts with humorous sayings only another geologist would really appreciate—today’s said Don’t Take Me For Granite, Just Because I’m Gneiss—looked as serious as bedrock. “I think you better watch out for your heart, Iris.”

That was one warning she didn’t need. She already knew how hazardous Asad was to her heart.

“What’s so funny?” Nawar asked, skipping up to join them, her father only a few steps behind.

Iris had worried that having them along would make doing her job difficult, but Asad was good with his daughter and this mountainous desert was his homeland. They’d kept busy with an impromptu lesson on geography targeted at the four-year-old’s level. Iris had no idea how much the child would remember, but something told her it would be more than she might expect.

“Russell made me laugh,” Iris said with a smile for the little girl.

Asad’s brows rose, his expression this side of dangerous. “Oh?”

“Told you,” Russell mouthed, his head facing Iris and away from Asad.

Iris shook her head.

“He did not make you laugh?” Asad asked.

Iris rolled her eyes. “Does it matter? How are you two doing? Bored?”

“Not in the least, but I believe it is time to take a break for eating and then Nawar will have her nap.”

“Where?” Surely the SUV would be too warm for the little girl to sleep in.

Though it was not as hot here as the desert at the base of the mountains, it was still sunny enough to heat the interior to uncomfortable levels.

“There.” He indicated the other side of the SUV.

And Iris noticed that while she had been working, he’d erected a small single-room goat-hair tent with an awning that created a second area in front open to any light breezes. It said something about how caught up in her work she got that she hadn’t even noticed him putting the tent up. Iris had no doubt the portable Bedouin home would be perfectly comfortable for Nawar’s nap.

“You’re a good dad.”

He shrugged. “I did not want you to feel rushed to return to the encampment.”

“Thank you.”

“You are welcome.” His eyes watched her lips.

She swayed forward, but caught herself before kissing him in front of his daughter and Russell. What was she thinking?

Thankfully Nawar caught their attention then, trying to drag the oversize basket of food prepared for them from the tent by herself.

They chatted while they ate and then Asad put his yawning daughter down for her nap. Afterward, he made himself comfortable under the awning with his laptop, the sheikh of the Sha’b Al’najid working on very modern business in an equally old setting.

Russell caught Iris watching Asad and shook his head.

“What?”

“You’ve got it bad … you do know that?”

“I had it bad, six years ago.”

“But not now? Wake up and smell the cordite, Iris. The man is so far under your skin, he’s got a direct path to your heart.” Russell set the core sampler in the ground.

“No,” she said more loudly than she intended. “I’m not going to love him again.”

“You’re trying to say you ever stopped?”

She glared at Russell, who blithely ignored her while he drew a clean sample of topsoil. “Enough of the personal observations. We’ve got plenty to do here without you turning into Dr. Phil on me.”

“Hey, I resent that.” He flicked her a grin over his shoulder. “I’ve got all my hair.”

“You’ve got a big mouth is what you’ve got.”

He stopped what he was doing and really looked at her, his expression back to the unfamiliar seriousness. “I’m your friend, Iris. I’m not going to lie to you.”

“Your truth isn’t necessarily my truth.”

“Oh, very Zen of you.” He was back to being a smart aleck.

“Stop, or I’m going to tell Genevieve you want grasshoppers in your dinner.”

“That lady sure does like you. It’s almost as if she’s looking forward to you joining the family,” he said meaningfully.

“Russell,” she practically yelled. One thing Iris could not afford was to allow Russell to plant ideas in her head that would only get her heart shattered a second time around.

“Fine, fine … I’ll stop.”

Despite their late start, Iris and Russell gathered a good day’s worth of samples, measurement and observations. Preliminary indications made her think that mining might very well be in Kadar’s future.

But Iris didn’t say anything of that nature to Asad or his family over dinner when they asked how her first day on the job had gone. Russell was dining with another family, getting the opportunity to experience more elements of the Bedouin culture.

Iris did not complain about not being afforded the same opportunity. There was nowhere she’d rather be and that was her personal cross to bear. Certainly, she didn’t need Russell’s observations on the matter.

Iris snuggled against Asad, their early-morning lovemaking having left her feeling drowsy and relaxed. “Are you coming with us again today?”

“But of course. I told you I would be your guide and protector while you are here.”

“How can you afford the time?” Challenging enough to be a business mogul, or a sheikh, but to be both?

She doubted many men could handle the pressure.

“I will bring my computer and do work as I did yesterday.”

“You spent a good portion of yesterday keeping Nawar occupied.”

“She is my joy.”

“She is incredibly sweet, but that doesn’t answer my question.”

“What question is that, az—Iris?”

She noticed him stumbling over the old endearment again, but pretended not to. “How you can have the time to babysit Russell and me like this? You can send someone else if you really feel we need looking after. It doesn’t have to be you.”

“Excuse me, but it does.”

“Come on, Asad. You’ve got what you want. You don’t need to keep playing nursemaid.”

“And what is it you believe I want?” he asked.

She rolled her eyes, though he wouldn’t see it with her head pillowed on his shoulder. Like he thought she wouldn’t know. “Me. Here.”

“I do want that, but there is more I desire, as well.”

“What?”

“Your safety, for one.”

“Seriously?” She sat up and stared down at Asad. “You don’t really think Russell and I are at any risk in the field. Kadar is not exactly a hotbed of crime. And the desert even less so.”

“Not all who come to these mountains are as honorable as the Sha’b Al’najid.”

“And Russell and I aren’t exactly doing our survey in the path of most travelers.” They were in foothills of the desert mountains, hours from the nearest village, twice as far from anything resembling a town or city.

“Who do you think knows of the two Western geologists doing their survey here in Kadar?”

“The sheikh and your family. I doubt even the whole camp knows why Russell and I are here.” They just weren’t that interesting.

Asad got up from the bed and drew on his thobe. “You would be wrong. Every member of my people knows of your purpose and the way you spend your days. Be assured many others do, as well. Gossip travels among the Bedouin like the sand in a storm in the desert.”

“So?”

“All who have heard this juicy tidbit of news are not so scrupulous as you would like to believe. The least dangerous are those that might merely covet your equipment for the money it could bring them.” He tossed her a hooded robe that swallowed her up when she put it on.

Meant to hit him midcalf, it brushed the carpet on her.

“Who is the most dangerous?” she asked, finding it difficult to keep her amusement at his paranoid worries hidden.

“Slavers.”

“Oh, please.” Now he was really reaching.

“Modern slavery is a nine-billion-dollar-a-year industry and a worldwide problem.”

“But the crime rate in Kadar is almost nonexistent.”

“There are always exceptions.” He frowned. “You will not be one of them.”

“If you’re so worried about it, then I’m surprised you’re willing to bring Nawar.”

He slid traditional leather slippers onto his feet. “You do not imagine that we travel into the mountains alone.”

“We did yesterday.”

“Did we?”

“Yes?”

“No. My guards are well trained and maintain their distance to give us the illusion of privacy.”

“You’re not joking.”

“Why would I make light of something so important?”

Why indeed, but the idea of having men lurking in the shadows and watching her was kind of creepy. “So you’re saying we’ve got a troupe of Ninjas hiding in plain sight protecting us?”

“Not Ninja, warriors of the Sha’b Al’najid.”

“You still have warriors in your tribe?” she asked with keen interest, her discomfort pushed aside in favor of feeding her curiosity.

“Every man is trained in the ways of stealth, fighting and the scimitar. It is tradition among my people. There is an elite force, my family’s bodyguards, that are trained in the ways of modern warfare, as well.”

“Your tribe is a lot wealthier than anyone would guess, aren’t they?”

“My family is.”

“But your family accepts responsibility for the Sha’b Al’najid.”

“Yes.”

“Amazing.”

“It is what it is.”

“Badra was such an idiot.”

“You think so?” Asad stopped in front of Iris, looking down at her with surprising intensity.

“I do.” Iris reached up and traced his lips, smiling when he nipped at her fingertip. “She had you and all of this and still, she wanted something else.”

He leaned down and kissed her, not passionately, but not chastely, either. It was intimate and gentle and quick … and it felt really nice. “I am flattered you feel that way.”

Iris wished she could share his equanimity about it. She was beginning to have some serious reservations about her current course of action. Yes, her heart was healing bit by bit, but was it just going to shatter again into a million pieces when she left Kadar?

She’d thought she could keep love out of the equation, but a mere two nights in his bed and Iris was already grasping for a lifeline while she felt herself drowning in dormant emotions.

“It would be a lot easier for me if you could simply act like the selfish user I convinced myself you were after you dumped me,” she complained with more honesty than she probably should have offered.

But he didn’t look like he minded, his dark eyes glowing. “You no longer see me as this person?”

She shrugged, the effect lost under the voluminous folds of his robe on her.

“Iris?” he prompted.

She sighed and admitted, “I’m learning that neither of our perceptions of the past was all that clear.”

“You are right. I thought you were far more experienced—”

Her snort of disbelief interrupted him.

“What?”

“How could you not realize how inexperienced I was back then? I was terrified you would get bored with my lack of prowess and go looking for greener pastures.”

“The passion between us was always so fiery—there was no room for practiced moves. I assumed you were as overwhelmed by desire as I was.”

“I was.”

“Yes, but with less experience.”

“Bragging now, are you?”

“Never. I have no need to brag. You think I am the most amazing lover ever.”

“Conceited.”

“Deny it.”

“You know I won’t.”

“Can’t,” he charged with one raised eyebrow.

She huffed fondly, “Jerk.”

“Is that the proper endearment to use for the man who rocks your world?”

“And what of the woman who rocks yours?” she asked facetiously.

“You will not allow me the proper endearment,” he accused.

“Poor you.”

He shook his head. “You are still determined I should not call you aziz?”

“Very.” That was one thing she was still absolutely sure about. Though her other beliefs and feelings were in something of a muddle, she knew she didn’t want him using the term for beloved when she wasn’t.

“One day you will allow it.”

“I won’t be in Kadar long enough for that to happen.” Considering the area Sheikh Hakim had hired her company to survey, Iris would be in Kadar only a month, six weeks at the outside.

It could have been a much more involved study, but Sheikh Hakim had ordered only a first-level survey. Most likely because he would use it to determine which areas to pursue further.

Nevertheless, Asad, did not look like he believed Iris’s claim. “Come with me to the baths and I will see what I can do about changing your mind.”