Читать книгу Yes, Please. Thanks!: Teaching Children of All Ages Manners, Respect and Social Skills for Life - Penny Palmano - Страница 15

Boundaries are the sets of rules we set for our children’s behaviour; a sort of framework of moral conduct within which they must learn to live. As long as children know exactly where these limits are they will be happy and content to operate within them. Naturally, most children will try and stretch them occasionally to see exactly what they can get away with, but this is absolutely normal and they are quite expecting and relieved to be told when they have crossed the line. Let’s face it, we all try and push our luck sometimes.

Boundaries teach children what is acceptable behaviour and in doing so they develop the self-control and self-discipline necessary to remain within them. Even children from as young as one will begin to respond to simple boundaries, as in the word ‘No’, when it is said in a firm voice distinguishable from your normal voice.

Inevitably, as children grow up, new boundaries will be introduced, but as long as they know what they are, they will flourish and develop within them and be reassured by them.

However, children who are not set boundaries often feel unloved and uncared for and are constantly floundering, looking for some sort of guidelines. This often manifests in the form of unacceptable behaviour, as if in a desperate plea for some sort of help and structure. Without boundaries children fail to develop self-control, and without this they will find it difficult to function properly within a normal society and can end up unhappy, lonely and dysfunctional adults.