Читать книгу The Lovin' Ain't Over for Women with Cancer - Ralph Alterowitz - Страница 8

Some women may be concerned that beginning a sexual event means that they must go on to sexual intercourse. Often, women have a greater desire for hugging, stroking, and kissing, as those give them comfort and the feeling of being appreciated and wanted. Intercourse may not even be possible or wanted. This concern can lead to being reluctant to get started, even though they may want part of the sexual activity.

Actually, a woman has several choices as to how far she wants to go after becoming a partner in a sexual encounter. Although many people think about sex being the same as intercourse, sex can be seen as the overall term for physical intimacy, whereas intercourse is one of several possible end points.

Assume that a woman’s starting point of sexual arousal is zero on a scale of zero to five. After some foreplay, she may get to a two or three. Now she has an emotional connection with what is happening at the moment and with her partner. She also feels desire. At this point, the woman has three choices. She needs to remember that she has a choice and is not on a non-stop trip to intercourse. Other options include having a sensual interaction or manually bringing each one or even just one of the partners to a climax.

Keeping a sexual event at a sensual level involves a lot of touching, kissing, and hugging. Touching, caressing, and stroking are cornerstones of sensuality. There are also massage techniques such as sensate massage if either partner wants it.

Manual stimulation can be satisfying to both partners, as this allows them orgasms without intercourse. Partners may stimulate each other, or masturbate with the support of the other partner. They do not have to climax, but this outcome is available to them.

A woman has a choice anywhere along the way to decide how far she wants to go depending on how she feels at the moment. The challenge for a woman is to feel free to exercise her right of choice without feeling guilty or believing that her partner will be upset. Being comfortable with what she wants is based on good communication with her partner. A woman can stop at caressing or manual stimulation for herself, and still bring her partner to orgasm in many different ways - manually, orally, or with a vibrator.