Читать книгу Mindful Fatherhood - Renat Minazhdinov - Страница 4

It is not kind of the book that examines philosophical “why we are here?” type of questions for humanity, while it is an entertaining discussion to have. I’d rather keep it focused on something that up to you us (you and me in our own ways) to decide or at least verify and influence. You may have all the noble goals of self-realization and making a world a better place etc. – it is up to everyone to decide, but no one should ignore Charles R. Darwin and the part of our very own evolution-defined mission. The whole idea of being a father is about passing the best you can pass to the next generation. And if we sum it up, the list is pretty short: you can pass genes and your knowledge.

Let us briefly examine what actually you can pass and what you really can control about it. As for the genes – of course you can control some aspects of it (like making sure you are not drunk like a fish when making a baby and hopefully took basic care about your health before that moment), but that’s really it. You just (happily and with pleasure) give out the genes and hope those will work out in the best way possible. Good news – this way worked for your father and granddad and many ancestors before them. You are the result of this. And based on the fact you came to the moment of thinking about being a father yourself – you got some good genes inside of you. Worth passing them on!

Here comes the difficult part – passing your knowledge and experience. It is difficult exactly because you are in control of this part way more than genes. What is important to pass? Will you have time and skill to really do that? (unlike with genes, where “skills” are embedded in you by mother nature and the time needed… well, not that long technically, if you know what I mean). Arguably, the part with knowledge and experience became more important than genes recently. Just because ability to learn, effectively work in the society and keep your mental and emotional stability are more important skills for success than muscle power, height, and color of eyes (not neglecting a good health in general, of course).

So, your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to mindfully filter, pack and share everything you believe will be beneficial for the baby. Please do not expect me to tell you what those things are and share a clear step by step list – there are plenty of authors trying to shove those lists and tell you exactly what to do: what to teach, what to say, how to behave etc. I am here to tell you precisely (and only) this: