Читать книгу Raising Able - Susan Tordella - Страница 33

Some skeptical readers may be thinking, “This takes time and effort. It’s easier to do everything myself than to get my child to help.”

Perhaps you have teenagers and despair of getting them to do anything they don’t want to do.

As I say to my husband, “You’re right, honey.” Getting children to contribute around the house requires an investment of expectation, time and effort. In the short term, it is easier for parents to be slaves or hire people to do the dirty work around the house.

If parents do everything for children or hire help, children have more time for activity-mania and sugared-screen-time. Parents can accept young people’s refusal to contribute to the household. Parents can criticize and shake their heads over shoddy jobs done by teens to sabotage parents’ efforts and convince them give up getting them to work around the house.

Parents who quit will avoid the battle and lose the war. Such parents will become their child’s servant and cultivate entitlement, which leads to battles that last longer than a standoff over cleaning a toilet.

If parents do not set up a chore system, they miss an opportunity to teach children self-discipline -- the ability to do something whether you feel like it or not.

Being counted upon to contribute regularly around the house benefits children on a number of levels. They belong. They are needed. They are important. What they do matters so much that their parents are willing to follow through.

Even when children and teens resist and yell at the top of their lungs, “I am not your servant!” make sure that they finish whatever they’re working on. Smile to yourself and think, “Nor am I your servant.”