Читать книгу Counseling the Contemporary Woman - Suzanne Degges-White - Страница 94

Agneshka reached out to her counselor for support because she felt angry and depressed. After her counselor gathered a detailed history about her background and present situation, they started exploring some potential goals for counseling. Throughout the assessment process, the counselor made sure to empathize with Agneshka and validate her feelings of loneliness, anger, and relationship dissatisfaction. Considering Agneshka’s background, her counselor paid close attention to her culture and asked relevant questions to ensure she fully understood Agneshka’s cultural perspective. The counselor asked about gender and family roles in her life, the significance of family gatherings and celebrations, and family expectation of her as a child and, now, as an adult child. Agneshka clarified that their culture is family oriented and that the expectation is to stick together, help each other out, and be obedient to parents. She further stated that her Catholic religion plays a significant role in her family, and they celebrate all the holidays together with immediate and extended family. They share typical gender roles, such as the father working out of the house and the mother primarily responsible for kids, household, and some part-time work. Agneshka stated that she has no one to go to and has a hard time being at home. Her counselor asked, “How do you view such family roles, responsibilities, and family values?”

Agneshka took a deep breath and slowly started: “I like to go to church and spend time with family, but we fight most of the time. I understand that as a woman I will get married at some point and have kids, but I want to focus on my career first, get settled in my professional life, and then consider family. I know I need to help around the house and with the kids, but I want to be on my own. I don’t like coming home and being asked where I was, where I go, what time I will be back . . . and then whatever I do to help, it’s never good enough . . . so what’s the point?” Agneshka’s counselor nodded and reflected, “It must be frustrating to be treated as a child and then made to feel like you are not good enough.” Agneshka nodded as tears welled up in her eyes.