Читать книгу Meditations for Pain Recovery - Tony Greco - Страница 79

MARCH 8

TOXIC FEELINGS

EMOTIONAL BALANCE

“I count him lost who is lost to shame.”

Plautus

In the book Pain Recovery, I discovered ways to deal with toxic feelings like shame and guilt. Just because I work a program of recovery, I’m not immune to either of these toxic feelings.

I know I’m feeling shame or guilt when I catch myself in thoughts like these:

I should be more patient with my spouse and kids; it’s not their fault that I’m in pain.

I should be back at work by now.

I shouldn’t be in this much pain.

What’s wrong with me?

When I’m dealing with shame and guilt (either giving it or getting it), I need to stop and review the tools I already have. I start by describing my own strengths and positive qualities. I identify any lies that other people have told me about myself that I can stop believing. Then I can discover (and remember) how to use this information to maintain better emotional balance. Whether I’m shaming others or feeling shame, I remember what I’ve learned, and change my feelings by thinking positively.

I’m in recovery, and don’t need to feel shame for who I am. My pain recovery program teaches me that I can live differently today; that I no longer have to do things I later feel shame over; that I can make positive choices today that make me feel good inside.