Читать книгу The World According to Vice - Vice Magazine - Страница 11

Vice: How old are you?

Helen: 19. Wait, no, 18. 19 next month.

What do you do for a living?

I’m a kitchen assistant at the minute.

What first attracted you to the BNP?

I don’t know. I couldn’t really actually tell you. There were a couple of the sentences I agreed with. Basically about how immigrants are coming and taking people’s jobs and that.

Are most of your friends BNP?

Some of them are.

And your parents?

No. What are they? I think Liberal Democrat. I dunno.

Are there any BNP policies you disagree with?

Not so far, no, ’cos I’m still in the middle of looking up all that about it at the moment.

When people say the BNP is a fascist party, what do you think?

Yes, in some ways it is. But there we are. It’s a hard decision. There’s some things I think are good and some things I think are bad, so it’s a hard decision to make, but it was the one party I felt closer to than any of the other parties.

Is there a big anti-BNP movement up in Newcastle? Do you get a lot of stick?

Not really.

Do you have arguments about it with people?

Sometimes, yeah. But not like heated arguments.

Fish or chips?

Fish.

Alan Carr or Jimmy Carr?

Alan.

Princess Di or Jade Goody?

Di.

Blair or Brown?

Brown.

Michael Jackson or Tim Westwood?

Michael Jackson.

Peter Andre or Stephen Hawking?

Peter Andre.

What do you think the BNP could do to improve its appeal to gay voters?

Erm, ooh, I don’t know. I haven’t a clue.

In terms of the BNP’s repatriation policy on immigration, if you had to choose, who would you repatriate first, Dizzee Rascal or Tinchy Stryder?

Tinchy Stryder, ’cos he’s not very well known. Dizzee Rascal’s more of a worldwide-known icon.

What should we do with Lenny Henry?

I don’t even know who that is, sorry.

Which do you dislike more, Muslims or black people?

Muslims. I’ve never seen any advertisements about blacks who come here and don’t work. It’s more the Muslims, ’cos basically that’s what I object to. My mum split up with my dad a couple of years ago, and she was going to get a flat off the council, and the first question they asked her on the form was “Are you an immigrant?” I don’t agree with that, you see, so that’s where it started from.

So you agree with the BNP’s send-’em-back policies?

Yeah.

But would it be possible to maybe come to a compromise with a noble race like the Chinese? Perhaps keep them on as a sort of servant class?

Yeah. I wouldn’t mind them if they actually worked and didn’t take all of our jobs, basically. I wouldn’t mind them if they contributed something to this country.

What nationality would you most like to keep in the UK?

African, because my nana’s African. She was a white African from somewhere next to Cape Town. She moved back here in 1987 or something. My granddad was in the RAF over there and she came back with him.

So what nationality would you most like to be waited-on by as a servant class?

Oh God, there’s a few. There’s a couple I would, but I can’t really pinpoint one.

Go on.

I don’t know. Chinese maybe?

Sure thing. What ethnicity would you most like to make love to?

Oh God, British.

Other than that?

Say… black?

What if immigrants only asked to be allowed into the country on condition they had been sterilised, so that they couldn’t create any children to further burden the state? Would that be a potential solution?

Um, yeah, I think so.

Let’s try a word association game. Just say the first word that comes into your head.

OK.

Golly.

Wally.

Rag.

Rug.

Goose.

Duck.

Oswald.

Place.

Concentration.

Head.

Bunny.

Rabbit.

Finally, has anything amusing ever happened to you in connection with spoons?

Spoons? Erm, no.

By the way, we got back in touch with Rebecca Edwards a couple of weeks later. She wasn’t too happy.