Читать книгу All About Coffee - William H. Ukers - Страница 33

Оглавление

I find it recorded that one James Farr, a barber, who kept the coffee-house which is now the Rainbow, by the Inner Temple Gate (one of the first in England), was in the year 1657, prosecuted by the inquest of St. Dunstan's in the West, for making and selling a sort of liquor called coffe, as a great nuisance and prejudice to the neighborhood, etc., and who would then have thought London would ever have had near three thousand such nuisances, and that coffee would have been, as now, so much drank by the best of quality and physicians?

FIRST ADVERTISEMENT FOR COFFEE—1652

Handbill used by Pasqua Rosée, who opened the first coffee house in London From the original in the British Museum

Hatton evidently attributed Fair's nuisance to the coffee itself, whereas the presentment[72] clearly shows it was in Farr's chimney and not in the coffee.

Mention has already been made that Sir Henry Blount was spoken of as "the father of English coffee houses" and his claim to this distinction would seem to be a valid one, for his strong personality "stamped itself upon the system." His favorite motto, "Loquendum est cum vulgo, sentiendum cum sapientibus" (the crowd may talk about it; the wise decide it), says Robinson, "expresses well their colloquial purpose, and was natural enough on the lips of one whose experience had been world wide." Aubrey says of Sir Henry Blount, "He is now neer or altogether eighty yeares, his intellectuals good still and body pretty strong."

Women played a not inconspicuous part in establishing businesses for the sale of the coffee drink in England, although the coffee houses were not for both sexes, as in other European countries. The London City Quaeries for 1660 makes mention of "a she-coffee merchant." Mary Stringar ran a coffee house in Little Trinity Lane in 1669; Anne Blunt was mistress of one of the Turk's-Head houses in Cannon Street in 1672. Mary Long was the widow of William Long, and her initials, together with those of her husband, appear on a token issued from the Rose tavern in Bridge Street, Covent Garden. Mary Long's token from the "Rose coffee house by the playhouse" in Covent Garden is shown among the group of coffee-house keepers' tokens herein illustrated.

The First Newspaper Advertisement

The first newspaper advertisement for coffee appeared, May 26, 1657, in the Publick Adviser of London, one of the first weekly pamphlets. The name of this publication was erroneously given as the Publick Advertiser by an early writer on coffee, and the error has been copied by succeeding writers. The first newspaper advertisement was contained in the issue of the Publick Adviser for the week of May 19 to May 26, and read:

In Bartholomew Lane on the back side of the Old Exchange, the drink called Coffee, (which is a very wholsom and Physical drink, having many excellent vertues, closes the Orifice of the Stomack, fortifies the heat within, helpeth Digestion, quickneth the Spirits, maketh the heart lightsom, is good against Eye-sores, Coughs, or Colds, Rhumes, Consumptions, Head-ach, Dropsie, Gout, Scurvy, Kings Evil, and many others is to be sold both in the morning, and at three of the clock in the afternoon).

Chocolate was also advertised for sale in London this same year. The issue of the Publick Adviser for June 16, 1657, contained this announcement:

In Bishopgate Street, in Queen's Head Alley, at a Frenchman's house is an excellent West India drink called chocolate, to be sold, where you may have it ready at any time, and also unmade at reasonable rates.

Tea was first sold publicly at Garraway's (or Garway's) in 1657.

Strange Coffee Mixtures

The doctors were loath to let coffee escape from the mysteries of the pharmacopœia and become "a simple and refreshing beverage" that any one might obtain for a penny in the coffee houses, or, if preferred, might prepare at home. In this they were aided and abetted by many well-meaning but misguided persons (some of them men of considerable intelligence) who seemed possessed of the idea that the coffee drink was an unpleasant medicine that needed something to take away its curse, or else that it required a complex method of preparation. Witness "Judge" Walter Rumsey's Electuary of Cophy, which appeared in 1657 in connection with a curious work of his called Organon Salutis: an instrument to cleanse the stomach.[73] The instrument itself was a flexible whale-bone, two or three feet long, with a small linen or silk button at the end, and was designed to be introduced into the stomach to produce the effect of an emetic. The electuary of coffee was to be taken by the patient before and after using the instrument, which the "judge" called his Provang. And this was the "judge's" "new and superior way of preparing coffee" as found in his prescription for making electuary of cophy:

Take equal quantity of Butter and Sallet-oyle, melt them well together, but not boyle them: Then stirre them well that they may incorporate together: Then melt therewith three times as much Honey, and stirre it well together: Then add thereunto powder of Turkish Cophie, to make it a thick Electuary.

A little consideration will convince any one that the electuary was most likely to achieve the purpose for which it was recommended.

THE FIRST NEWSPAPER ADVERTISEMENT FOR COFFEE—1657

Another concoction invented by the "judge" was known as "wash-brew", and included oatmeal, powder of "cophie", a pint of ale or any wine, ginger, honey, or sugar to please the taste; to these ingredients butter might be added and any cordial powder or pleasant spice. It was to be put into a flannel bag and "so keep it at pleasure like starch." This was a favorite medicine among the common people of Wales.

The book contained in a prefix an interesting historical document in the shape of a letter from James Howell (1595–1666) the writer and historiographer, which read:

Touching coffee, I concurre with them in opinion, who hold it to be that black-broth which was us'd of old in Lacedemon, whereof the Poets sing; Surely it must needs be salutiferous, because so many sagacious, and the wittiest sort of Nations use it so much; as they who have conversed with Shashes and Turbants doe well know. But, besides the exsiccant quality it hath to dry up the crudities of the Stomach, as also to comfort the Brain, to fortifie the sight with its steem, and prevent Dropsies, Gouts, the Scurvie, together with the Spleen and Hypocondriacall windes (all which it doth without any violance or distemper at all.) I say, besides all these qualities, 'tis found already, that this Coffee-drink hath caused a greater sobriety among the nations; for whereas formerly Apprentices and Clerks with others, used to take their mornings' draught in Ale, Beer or Wine, which by the dizziness they cause in the Brain, make many unfit for business, they use now to play the Good-fellows in this wakefull and civill drink: Therefore that worthy Gentleman, Mr. Mudiford[74], who introduced the practice hereof first to London, deserves much respect of the whole nation.

The coffee drink at one time was mixed with sugar candy, and also with mustard. In the coffee houses, however, it was usually served black; "few people then mixed it with either sugar or milk."

Fantastic Coffee Claims

One can not fail to note in connection with the introduction of coffee into England that the beverage suffered most from the indiscretions of its friends. On the one hand, the quacks of the medical profession sought to claim it for their own; and, on the other, more or less ignorant laymen attributed to the drink such virtues as its real champions among the physicians never dreamed of. It was the favorite pastime of its friends to exaggerate coffee's merits; and of its enemies, to vilify its users. All this furnished good "copy" for and against the coffee house, which became the central figure in each new controversy.

From the early English author who damned it by calling it "more wholesome than toothsome", to Pasqua Rosée and his contemporaries, who urged its more fantastic claims, it was forced to make its way through a veritable morass of misunderstanding and intolerance. No harmless drink in history has suffered more at hands of friend and foe.

Did its friends hail it as a panacea, its enemies retorted that it was a slow poison. In France and in England there were those who contended that it produced melancholy, and those who argued it was a cure for the same. Dr. Thomas Willis (1621–1673), a distinguished Oxford physician whom Antoine Portal (1742–1832) called "one of the greatest geniuses that ever lived", said he would sometimes send his patients to the coffee house rather than to the apothecary's shop. An old broadside, described later in this chapter, stressed the notion that if you "do but this Rare ARABIAN cordial use, and thou may'st all the Doctors Slops Refuse."

As a cure for drunkenness its "magic" power was acclaimed by its friends, and grudgingly admitted by its foes. This will appear presently in a description of the war of the broadsides and the pamphlets. Coffee was praised by one writer as a deodorizer. Another (Richard Bradley), in his treatise concerning its use with regard to the plague, said if its qualities had been fully known in 1665, "Dr. Hodges and other learned men of that time would have recommended it." As a matter of fact, in Gideon Harvey's Advice against the Plague, published in 1665, we find, "coffee is commended against the contagion."

This is how the drink's sobering virtue was celebrated by the author of the Rebellious Antidote:

Come, Frantick Fools, leave off your Drunken fits.

Obsequious be and I'll recall your Wits,

From perfect Madness to a modest Strain

For farthings four I'll fetch you back again,

Enable all your mene with tricks of State,

Enter and sip and then attend your Fate;

Come Drunk or Sober, for a gentle Fee,

Come n'er so Mad, I'll your Physician be.

Dr. Willis, in his Pharmaceutice Rationalis (1674), was one of the first to attempt to do justice to both sides of the coffee question. At best, he thought it a somewhat risky beverage, and its votaries must, in some cases, be prepared to suffer languor and even paralysis; it may attack the heart and cause tremblings in the limbs. On the other hand it may, if judiciously used, prove a marvelous benefit; "being daily drunk it wonderfully clears and enlightens each part of the Soul and disperses all the clouds of every Function."

It was a long time before recognition was obtained for the truth about the "novelty drink"; especially that, if there were any beyond purely social virtues to be found in coffee, they were "political rather than medical."

Dr. James Duncan, of the Faculty of Montpellier, in his book Wholesome Advice against the Abuse of Hot Liquors, done into English in 1706, found coffee no more deserving of the name of panacea than that of poison.

George Cheyne (1671–1743), the noted British physician, proclaimed his neutrality in the words, "I have neither great praise nor bitter blame for the thing."

Coffee Prices and Coffee Licenses

Coffee, with tea and chocolate, was first mentioned in the English Statute books in 1660, when a duty of four pence was laid upon every gallon made and sold, "to be paid by the maker." Coffee was classed by the House of Commons with "other outlandish drinks."

It is recorded in 1662 that "the right coffee powder" was being sold at the Turk's Head coffee house in Exchange Alley for "4s. to 6s. 8d. per pound; that pounded in a mortar, 2s; East India berry, 1s. 6d.; and the right Turkie berry, well garbled [ground] at 3s. The ungarbled [in the bean] for less with directions how to use the same." Chocolate was also to be had at "2s. 6d. the pound; the perfumed from 4s. to 10s."

At one time coffee sold for five guineas a pound in England, and even forty crowns (about forty-eight dollars) a pound was paid for it.

In 1663, all English coffee houses were required to be licensed; the fee was twelve pence. Failure to obtain a license was punished by a fine of five pounds for every month's violation of the law. The coffee houses were under close surveillance by government officials. One of these was Muddiman, a good scholar and an "arch rogue", who had formerly "written for the Parliament" but who later became a paid spy. L'Estrange, who had a patent on "the sole right of intelligence", wrote in his Intelligencer that he was alarmed at the ill effects of "the ordinary written papers of Parliament's news … making coffee houses and all the popular clubs judges of those councils and deliberations which they have nothing to do with at all."

The first royal warrant for coffee was given by Charles II to Alexander Man, a Scotsman who had followed General Monk to London, and set up in Whitehall. Here he advertised himself as "coffee man to Charles II."

Owing to increased taxes on tea, coffee, and newspapers, near the end of Queen Anne's reign (1714) coffee-house keepers generally raised their prices as follows: Coffee, two pence per dish; green tea, one and a half pence per dish. All drams, two pence per dram. At retail, coffee was then sold for five shillings per pound; while tea brought from twelve to twenty-eight shillings per pound.

Coffee Club of The Rota

"Coffee and Commonwealth", says a pamphleteer of 1665, "came in together for a Reformation, to make 's a free and sober nation." The writer argues that liberty of speech should be allowed, "where men of differing judgements croud"; and he adds, "that's a coffee-house, for where should men discourse so free as there?" Robinson's comments are apt:

Now perhaps we do not always connect the ideas of sociableness and freedom of discussion with the days of Puritan rule; yet it must be admitted that something like geniality and openness characterized what Pepys calls the Coffee Club of the Rota. This "free and open Society of ingenious gentlemen" was founded in the year 1659 by certain members of the Republican party, whose peculiar opinions had been timidly expressed and not very cordially tolerated under the Great Oliver. By the weak Government that followed, these views were regarded with extreme dislike and with some amount of terror.

"They met", says Aubrey, who was himself of their number, "at the Turk's Head [Miles's coffee house] in New Palace Yard, Westminster, where they take water, at one Miles's, the next house to the staires, where was made purposely a large ovall table, with a passage in the middle for Miles to deliver his coffee."

Robinson continues:

This curious refreshment bar and the interest with which the beverage itself was regarded, were quite secondary to the excitement caused by another novelty. When, after heated disputation, a member desired to test the opinion of the meeting, any particular point might, by agreement, be put to the vote and then everything depended upon "our wooden oracle," the first balloting-box ever seen in England. Formal methods of procedure and the intensely practical nature of the subjects discussed, combined to give a real importance to this Amateur Parliament.

A Coffee House in the Time of Charles II

From a wood cut of 1674

The Rota, or Coffee Club, as Pepys called it, was essentially a debating society for the dissemination of republican opinions. It was preceded only, in the reign of Henry IV, by the club called La Court de Bone Compagnie; by Sir Walter Raleigh's Friday Street, or Bread Street, club; the club at the Mermaid tavern in Bread Street, of which Shakespeare, Beaumont, Fletcher, Raleigh, Selden, Donne, et al., were members; and "rare" Ben Jonson's Devil tavern club, between Middle Temple Gate and Temple Bar.

The Rota derived its name from a plan, which it was designed to promote, for changing a certain number of members of parliament annually by rotation. It was founded by James Harrington, who had painted it in fairest colors in his Oceana, that ideal commonwealth.

Sir William Petty was one of its members. Around the table, "in a room every evening as full as it could be crammed," says Aubrey, sat Milton (?) and Marvell, Cyriac Skinner, Harrington, Nevill, and their friends, discussing abstract political questions.

The Rota became famous for its literary strictures. Among these was "The censure of the Rota upon Mr. Milton's book entitled The ready and easie way to establish a free commonwealth" (1660), although it is doubtful if Milton was ever a visitor to this "bustling coffee club." The Rota also censured "Mr. Driden's Conquest of Granada" (1673).

Early Coffee-House Manners and Customs

Among many of the early coffee-house keepers there was great anxiety that the coffee house, open to high and low, should be conducted under such restraints as might secure the better class of customers from annoyance. The following set of regulations in somewhat halting rhyme was displayed on the walls of several of the coffee houses in the seventeenth century:

The Rules and Orders of the Coffee House.


Enter, Sirs, freely, but first, if you please,

Peruse our civil orders, which are these.


First, gentry, tradesmen, all are welcome hither,

And may without affront sit down together:

Pre-eminence of place none here should mind,

But take the next fit seat that he can find:

Nor need any, if finer persons come,

Rise up to assigne to them his room;

To limit men's expence, we think not fair,

But let him forfeit twelve-pence that shall swear;

He that shall any quarrel here begin,

Shall give each man a dish t' atone the sin; And so shall he, whose compliments extend So far to drink in coffee to his friend; Let noise of loud disputes be quite forborne, No maudlin lovers here in corners mourn, But all be brisk and talk, but not too much, On sacred things, let none presume to touch. Nor profane Scripture, nor sawcily wrong Affairs of state with an irreverent tongue: Let mirth be innocent, and each man see That all his jests without reflection be; To keep the house more quiet and from blame, We banish hence cards, dice, and every game; Nor can allow of wagers, that exceed Five shillings, which ofttimes much trouble breed; Let all that's lost or forfeited be spent In such good liquor as the house doth vent. And customers endeavour, to their powers, For to observe still, seasonable hours. Lastly, let each man what he calls for pay, And so you're welcome to come every day.

The early coffee houses were often up a flight of stairs, and consisted of a single large room with "tables set apart for divers topics." There is a reference to this in the prologue to a comedy of 1681 (quoted by Malone):

In a coffee house just now among the rabble

I bluntly asked, which is the treason table?

This was the arrangement at Man's and others favored by the wits, the literati, and "men of fashionable instincts." In the distinctly business coffee houses separate rooms were provided at a later time for mercantile transactions. The introduction of wooden partitions—wooden boxes, as at a tavern—was also of somewhat later date.

A print of 1674 shows five persons of different ranks in life, one of them smoking, sitting on chairs around a coffee-house table, on which are small basins, or dishes, without saucers, and tobacco pipes, while a coffee boy is serving coffee.

In the beginning, only coffee was dispensed in the English coffee houses. Soon chocolate, sherbert, and tea were added; but the places still maintained their status as social and temperance factors. Constantine Jennings (or George Constantine) of the Grecian advertised chocolate, sherbert and tea at retail in 1664–65; also free instruction in the part of preparing these liquors. "Drams and cordial waters were to be had only at coffee houses newly set up," says Elford the younger, writing about 1689. "While some few places added ale and beer as early as 1669, intoxicating liquors were not items of importance for many years."

A London Coffee House of the Seventeenth Century

From a wood cut of the period

After the fire of 1666, many new coffee houses were opened that were not limited to a single room up a flight of stairs. Because the coffee-house keepers over-emphasized the sobering qualities of the coffee drink, they drew many undesirable characters from the taverns and ale houses after the nine o'clock closing hour. These were hardly calculated to improve the reputation of the coffee houses; and, indeed, the decline of the coffee houses as a temperance institution would seem to trace back to this attitude of false pity for the victims of tavern vices, evils that many of the coffee houses later on embraced to their own undoing. The early institution was unique, its distinctive features being unlike those of any public house in England or on the Continent. Later on, in the eighteenth century, when these distinctive features became obscured, the name coffee house became a misnomer.

Coffee House, Queen Anne's Time—1702–14

Showing coffee pots, coffee dishes, and coffee boy

However, Robinson says, "the close intercourse between the habitués of the coffee house, before it lost anything of its generous social traditions and whilst the issue of the struggle for political liberty was as yet uncertain, was to lead to something more than a mere jumbling or huddling together of opposites. The diverse elements gradually united in the bonds of common sympathy, or were forcibly combined by persecution from without until there resulted a social, political and moral force of almost irresistible strength."

Coffee-House Keepers' Tokens

The great London fire of 1666 destroyed some of the coffee houses; but prominent among those that survived was the Rainbow, whose proprietor, James Farr, issued one of the earliest coffee-house tokens, doubtless in grateful memory of his escape. Farr's token shows an arched rainbow emerging from the clouds of the "great fire," indicating that all was well with him, and the Rainbow still radiant. On the reverse the medal was inscribed, "In Fleet Street—His Half Penny."

A large number of these trade coins were put out by coffee-house keepers and other tradesmen in the seventeenth century as evidence of an amount due, as stated thereon, by the issuer to the holder. Tokens originated because of the scarcity of small change. They were of brass, copper, pewter, and even leather, gilded. They bore the name, address, and calling of the issuer, the nominal value of the piece, and some reference to his trade. They were readily redeemed, on presentation, at their face value. They were passable in the immediate neighborhood, seldom reaching farther than the next street. C.G. Williamson writes:

Tokens are essentially democratic; they would never have been issued but for the indifference of the Government to a public need; and in them we have a remarkable instance of a people forcing a legislature to comply with demands at once reasonable and imperative. Taken as a whole series, they are homely and quaint, wanting in beauty, but not without a curious domestic art of their own.

Robinson finds an exception to the general simplicity in the tokens issued by one of the Exchange Alley houses. The dies of these tokens are such as to have suggested the skilled workmanship of John Roettier. The most ornate has the head of a Turkish sultan at that time famed for his horrible deeds, ending in suicide; its inscription runs:

Morat ye Great Men did mee call;

Where Eare I came I conquer'd all.

A number of the most interesting coffee-house keepers' tokens in the Beaufoy collection in the Guildhall Museum were photographed for this work, and are shown herewith. It will be observed that many of the traders of 1660–75 adopted as their trade sign a hand pouring coffee from a pot, invariably of the Turkish-ewer pattern. Morat (Amurath) and Soliman were frequent coffee-house signs in the seventeenth century.

J.H. Burn, in his Catalogue of Traders' Tokens, recites that in 1672 "divers persons who presumed … to stamp, coin, exchange and distribute farthings, halfpence and pence of brass and copper" were "taken into custody, in order to a severe prosecution"; but upon submission, their offenses were forgiven, and it was not until the year 1675 that the private token ceased to pass current.

PLATE 1—COFFEE-HOUSE KEEPERS' TOKENS OF THE 17TH CENTURY

Drawn for this work from the originals in the British Museum, and in the Beaufoy collection at the Guildhall Museum

A royal proclamation at the close of 1674 enjoined the prosecution of any who should "utter base metals with private stamps," or "hinder the vending of those half pence and farthings which are provided for necessary exchange." After this, tokens were issued stamped "necessary change."

A Broad-side of 1663

Opposition to the Coffee House

It is easy to see why the coffee houses at once found favor among men of intelligence in all classes. Until they came, the average Englishman had only the tavern as a place of common resort. But here was a public house offering a non-intoxicating beverage, and its appeal was instant and universal. As a meeting place for the exchange of ideas it soon attained wide popularity. But not without opposition. The publicans and ale-house keepers, seeing business slipping away from them, made strenuous propaganda against this new social center; and not a few attacks were launched against the coffee drink. Between the Restoration and the year 1675, of eight tracts written upon the subject of the London coffee houses, four have the words "character of a coffee house" as part of their titles. The authors appear eager to impart a knowledge of the town's latest novelty, with which many readers were unacquainted.

One of these early pamphlets (1662) was entitled The Coffee Scuffle, and professed to give a dialogue between "a learned knight and a pitifull pedagogue," and contained an amusing account of a house where the Puritan element was still in the ascendant. A numerous company is present, and each little group being occupied with its own subject, the general effect is that of another Babel. While one is engaged in quoting the classics, another confides to his neighbors how much he admires Euclid;

A third's for a lecture, a fourth a conjecture,

A fifth for a penny in the pound.

Theology is introduced. Mask balls and plays are condemned. Others again discuss the news, and are deep in the store of "mercuries" here to be found. One cries up philosophy. Pedantry is rife, and for the most part unchecked, when each 'prentice-boy "doth call for his coffee in Latin" and all are so prompt with their learned quotations that "'t would make a poor Vicar to tremble."

The first noteworthy effort attacking the coffee drink was a satirical broadside that appeared in 1663. It was entitled A Cup of Coffee: or, Coffee in its Colours. It said:

For men and Christians to turn Turks, and think

T'excuse the Crime because 'tis in their drink,

Is more than Magick. …

Pure English Apes! Ye may, for ought I know,

Would it but mode, learn to eat Spiders too.

The writer wonders that any man should prefer coffee to canary, and refers to the days of Beaumont, Fletcher, and Ben Jonson. He says:

They drank pure nectar as the gods drink too,

Sublim'd with rich Canary. …

shall then

These less than coffee's self, these coffee-men,

These sons of nothing, that can hardly make

Their Broth, for laughing how the jest doth take;

Yet grin, and give ye for the Vine's pure Blood

A loathsome potion, not yet understood,

Syrrop of soot, or Essence of old Shooes,

Dasht with Diurnals and the Books of news?

The author of A Cup of Coffee, it will be seen, does not shrink from using epithets.

PLATE 2—COFFEE-HOUSE KEEPERS' TOKENS OF THE 17TH CENTURY

Drawn for this work from the originals in the British Museum, and in the Beaufoy collection at the Guildhall Museum]

The Coffee Man's Granado Discharged upon the Maiden's Complaint Against Coffee, a dialogue in verse, also appeared in 1663.

The Character of a Coffee House, by an Eye and Ear Witness appeared in 1665. It was a ten-page pamphlet, and proved to be excellent propaganda for coffee. It is so well done, and contains so much local color, that it is reproduced here, the text Museum. The title page reads:

The Character of a Coffee-House wherein Is contained a Description of the Persons usually frequenting it, with their Discourse and Humors, As Also The Admirable Vertues of COFFEE By an Eye and Ear Witness
When Coffee once was vended here, The Alc'ron shortly did appear, For our Reformers were such Widgeons. New Liquors brought in new Religions.
Printed in the Year, 1665.

The text and the arrangement of the body of the pamphlet are as follows:

The Character of a Coffee-House

THE DERIVATION OF

A COFFEE-HOUSE


A Coffee-house, the learned hold It is a place where Coffee's sold; This derivation cannot fail us, For where Ale's vended, that's an Ale-house. This being granted to be true, 'Tis meet that next the Signs we shew Both where and how to find this house Where men such cordial broth carowse. And if Culpepper woon some glory In turning the Dispensatory From Latin into English; then Why should not all good English men Give him much thanks who shews a cure For all diseases men endure? SIGNS: HOW TO FIND IT OUT As you along the streets do trudge, To take the pains you must not grudge, To view the Posts or Broomsticks where The Signs of Liquors hanged are. And if you see the great Morat With Shash on's head instead of hat, Or any Sultan in his dress, Or picture of a Sultaness, Or John's admir'd curled pate, Or th' great Mogul in's Chair of State, Or Constantine the Grecian, Who fourteen years was th' onely man That made Coffee for th' great Bashaw, Although the man he never saw; Or if you see a Coffee-cup Fil'd from a Turkish pot, hung up Within the clouds, and round it Pipes, Wax Candles, Stoppers, these are types And certain signs (with many more Would be too long to write them 'ore,) Which plainly do Spectators tell That in that house they Coffee sell. Some wiser than the rest (no doubt,) Say they can by the smell find't out; In at a door (say they,) but thrust Your Nose, and if you scent burnt Crust, Be sure there's Coffee sold that's good, For so by most 'tis understood. Now being enter'd, there's no needing Of complements or gentile breeding, For you may seat you any where, There's no respect of persons there; Then comes the Coffee-man to greet you, With welcome Sir, let me entreat you, To tell me what you'l please to have, For I'm your humble, humble slave; But if you ask, what good does Coffee? He'l answer, Sir, don't think I scoff yee, If I affirm there's no disease Men have that drink it but find ease. THE VERTUES OF COFFEE Look, there's a man who takes the steem In at his Nose, has an extreme Worm in his pate, and giddiness, Ask him and he will say no less. There sitteth one whose Droptick belly Was hard as flint, now's soft as jelly. There stands another holds his head 'Ore th' Coffee-pot, was almost dead Even now with Rhume; ask him hee'l say That all his Rhum's now past away. See, there's a man sits now demure And sober, was within this hour Quite drunk, and comes here frequently, For 'tis his daily Malady, More, it has such reviving power 'Twill keep a man awake an houre, Nay, make his eyes wide open stare Both Sermon time and all the prayer. Sir, should I tell you all the rest O' th' cures 't has done, two hours at least In numb'ring them I needs must spend, Scarce able then to make an end. Besides these vertues that's therein. For any kind of Medicine, The Commonwealth-Kingdom I'd say, Has mighty reason for to pray That still Arabia may produce Enough of Berry for it's use: For't has such strange magnetick force, That it draws after't great concourse Of all degrees of persons, even From high to low, from morn till even; Especially the sober Party, And News-mongers do drink't most hearty Here you'r not thrust into a Box As Taverns do to catch the Fox, But as from th' top of Pauls high steeple, Th' whole City's view'd, even so all people May here be seen; no secrets are At th' Court for Peace, or th' Camp for War, But straight they'r here disclos'd and known; Men in this Age so wise are grown. Now (Sir) what profit may accrew By this, to all good men, judge you. With that he's loudly call'd upon For Coffee, and then whip he's gone. THE COMPANY Here at a Table sits (perplext) A griping Usurer, and next To him a gallant Furioso, Then nigh to him a Virtuoso; A Player then (full fine) sits down, And close to him a Country Clown. O' th' other side sits some Pragmatick, And next to him some sly Phanatick. THE SEVERAL LIQUORS The gallant he for Tea doth call, The Usurer for nought at all. The Pragmatick he doth intreat That they will fill him some Beau-cheat, The Virtuoso he cries hand me Some Coffee mixt with Sugar-candy. Phanaticus (at last) says come, Bring me some Aromaticum. The Player bawls for Chocolate, All which the Bumpkin wond'ring at, Cries, ho, my Masters, what d' ye speak, D' ye call for drink in Heathen Greek? Give me some good old Ale or Beer, Or else I will not drink, I swear. Then having charg'd their Pipes around. THEIR DISCOURSE They silence break; First the profound And sage Phanatique, Sirs what news? Troth says the Us'rer I ne'r use To tip my tongue with such discourse, 'Twere news to know how to disburse A summ of mony (makes me sad) To get ought by't, times are so bad. The other answers, truly Sir You speak but truth, for I'le aver They ne'r were worse; did you not hear What prodigies did late appear At Norwich, Ipswich, Grantham, Gotam? And though prophane ones do not not'em, Yet we—Here th' Virtuoso stops The current of his speech, with hopes Quoth he, you will not tak'd amiss, I say all's lies that's news like this, For I have Factors all about The Realm, so that no Stars peep out That are unusual, much less these Strange and unheard-of prodigies You would relate, but they are tost To me in letters by first Post. At which the Furioso swears Such chat as this offends his ears It rather doth become this Age To talk of bloodshed, fury, rage, And t' drink stout healths in brim-fill'd Nogans. To th' downfall of the Hogan Mogans. With that the Player doffs his Bonnet, And tunes his voice as if a Sonnet Were to be sung; then gently says, O what delight there is in Plays! Sure if we were but all in Peace, This noise of Wars and News would cease; All sorts of people then would club Their pence to see a Play that's good. You'l wonder all this while (perhaps) The Curioso holds his chaps. But he doth in his thoughts devise, How to the rest he may seem wise; Yet able longer not to hold, His tedious tale too must be told, And thus begins, Sirs unto me It reason seems that liberty Of speech and words should be allow'd Where men of differing judgements croud, And that's a Coffee-house, for where Should men discourse so free as there? Coffee and Commonwealth begin Both with one letter, both came in Together for a Reformation, To make's a free and sober Nation. But now—With that Phanaticus Gives him a nod, and speaks him thus, Hold brother, I know your intent, That's no dispute convenient For this same place, truths seldome find Acceptance here, they'r more confin'd To Taverns and to Ale-house liquor, Where men do vent their minds more quicker If that may for a truth but pass What's said, In vino veritas. With that up starts the Country Clown, And stares about with threatening frown. As if he would even eat them all up. Then bids the boy run quick and call up, A Constable, for he has reason To fear their Latin may be treason But straight they all call what's to pay, Lay't down, and march each several way. THE COMPANY At th' other table sits a Knight, And here a grave old man ore right Against his worship, then perhaps That by and by a Drawer claps His bum close by them, there down squats A dealer in old shoes and hats; And here withouten any panick Fear, dread or care a bold Mechanick. HEIR DISCOURSE The Knight (because he's so) he prates Of matters far beyond their pates. The grave old man he makes a bustle, And his wise sentence in must justle. Up starts th' Apprentice boy and he Says boldly so and so't must be. The dealer in old shoes to utter His saying too makes no small sputter. Then comes the pert mechanick blade, And contradicts what all have said. *** There by the fier-side doth sit, One freezing in an Ague fit. Another poking in't with th' tongs, Still ready to cough up his lungs Here sitteth one that's melancolick, And there one singing in a frolick. Each one hath such a prety gesture, At Smithfield fair would yield a tester. Boy reach a pipe cries he that shakes, The songster no Tobacco takes, Says he who coughs, nor do I smoak, Then Monsieur Mopus turns his cloak Off from his face, and with a grave Majestick beck his pipe doth crave. They load their guns and fall a smoaking Whilst he who coughs sits by a choaking, Till he no longer can abide. And so removes from th' fier side. Now all this while none calls to drink, Which makes the Coffee boy to think Much they his pots should so enclose, He cannot pass but tread on toes. With that as he the Nectar fills From pot to pot, some on't he spills Upon the Songster. Oh cries he. Pox, what dost do? thou'st burnt my knee; No says the boy, (to make a bald And blind excuse.) Sir 'twill not scald. With that the man lends him a cuff O' th' ear, and whips away in snuff. The other two, their pipes being out, Says Monsieur Mopus I much doubt My friend I wait for will not come, But if he do, say I'm gone home. Then says the Aguish man I must come According to my wonted custome, To give ye' a visit, although now I dare not drink, and so adieu. The boy replies, O Sir, however You'r very welcome, we do never Our Candles, Pipes or Fier grutch To daily customers and such, They'r Company (without expence,) For that's sufficient recompence. Here at a table all alone, Sits (studying) a spruce youngster, (one Who doth conceipt himself fully witty, And's counted one o' th' wits o' th' City,) Till by him (with a stately grace,) A Spanish Don himself doth place. Then (cap in hand) a brisk Monsieur He takes his seat, and crowds as near As possibly that he can come. Then next a Dutchman takes his room. The Wits glib tongue begins to chatter, Though't utters more of noise than matter, Yet 'cause they seem to mind his words, His lungs more battle still affords At last says he to Don, I trow You understand me? Sennor no Says th' other. Here the Wit doth pause A little while, then opes his jaws, And says to Monsieur, you enjoy Our tongue I hope? Non par ma foy, Replies the Frenchman: nor you, Sir? Says he to th' Dutchman, Neen mynheer, With that he's gone, and cries, why sho'd He stay where wit's not understood? There in a place of his own chusing (Alone) some lover sits a musing, With arms across, and's eyes up lift, As if he were of sence bereft. Till sometimes to himself he's speaking, Then sighs as if his heart were breaking. Here in a corner sits a Phrantick, And there stands by a frisking Antick, Of all sorts some and all conditions Even Vintners, Surgeons and Physicians. The blind, the deaf, and aged cripple Do here resort and Coffee tipple. Now here (perhaps) you may expect My Muse some trophies should erect In high flown verse, for to set forth The noble praises of its worth. Truth is, old Poets beat their brains To find out high and lofty strains To praise the (now too frequent) use Of the bewitching grapes strong juice, Some have strain'd hard for to exalt The liquor of our English Mault Nay Don has almost crackt his nodle Enough t'applaud his Caaco Caudle. The Germans Mum, Teag's Usquebagh, (Made him so well defend Tredagh,) Metheglin, which the Brittains tope, Hot Brandy wine, the Hogans hope. Stout Meade which makes the Russ to laugh, Spic'd Punch (in bowls) the Indians quaff. All these have had their pens to raise Them Monuments of lasting praise, Onely poor Coffee seems to me No subject fit for Poetry At least 'tis one that none of mine is, So I do wave 't, and here write— FINIS.

All About Coffee

Подняться наверх