Читать книгу Regency Affairs Part 2: Books 7-12 Of 12 - Ann Lethbridge - Страница 24

The ball to mark the end of summer hummed with activity when Hattie arrived at Summerfield three days later. She hated the bitter-sweetness of attending a ball here again. It shouldn’t matter that the last time she had been here, she had met Kit, but somehow it did. That evening had changed her life in more ways than she had considered possible.

Now she was committed to dancing with him again. Over the past few days as the excitement of Livvy’s engagement swirled around her, she had tried to think up an excuse, but none had come.

After he had engineered the engagement between Mr Hook and Livvy, her sister felt that Kit could do no wrong. And she kept going on about how Hattie had made a mistake in refusing him. Even now as they waited, Stephanie made several remarks about how useful Kit was. It was as if she had suddenly been re-infected with her matchmaking fever.

Hattie closed her ears.

A tingling went down her back. She glanced over her shoulder. A tall figure alighted from a carriage and then turned to help a woman down.

Kit.

As if she had spoken his name, he turned towards where she was standing, waiting to greet the hosts. A tiny smile briefly crossed his features. He nodded towards where she stood, waiting with Livvy, and then whispered something in his mother’s ear.

Once she would have blushed. Now she forced herself to coolly nod, only to be greeted by an enthusiastic wave and a gesture to come over from Mrs Reynaud. To Hattie’s astonishment, Mrs Reynaud was not veiled, but dressed in a sumptuous gown with a necklace of diamonds sparking at her throat.

Briefly she contemplated pretending she had not seen the wave, but she knew that would go against the fibre of her being. She did want to see her.

‘I will be back.’ Hattie pressed Stephanie’s hand. ‘This queue is taking ages. Mrs Reynaud is here. I hadn’t realised that she had recovered from her chill.’

Stephanie’s gaze narrowed, taking in Hattie’s reaction to the latest arrivals. ‘You haven’t been paying attention, Hattie. I called on Mrs Reynaud with Livvy two days ago when you were indisposed. Where is your head these days?’

‘I’m going to greet my friend,’ Hattie declared. ‘Please don’t read anything more into it.’

‘As if you would allow me to!’

Hattie pulled back her shoulders, suddenly glad that she had given in to temptation and had worn a new garnet-red ball gown with cream-coloured lace around the neckline. She loved the way the skirt moved about her ankles and how the garnet-studded hairnet completed the look. She was not some widow content to stay on the shelf, but a woman determined to make the most of life. She might have agreed to dance with Kit, but it didn’t mean he had to be the only man she danced with.

‘You look lovely, my dear,’ Mrs Reynaud said with a huge smile when she reached the pair. Close up, the family resemblance was so marked that Hattie wondered how she had missed it earlier. Whatever happened, the reconciliation had done wonders for Mrs Reynaud. ‘Doesn’t she look lovely, Christopher?’

Hattie forced herself not to move a muscle as Kit’s gaze roamed over her.

‘Mrs Wilkinson looks as she always does,’ Kit said, inclining his head.

Hattie dropped the barest of curtsies. As far as compliments, she could have hardly thought of one which tasted more of ash. She searched his eyes for warmth, but found his expression guarded. ‘I thank you for the compliment.’

‘It was sincerely given.’

‘I’m pleased you brought your mother here.’

‘It took some doing. Up to the last moment she kept me guessing. Apparently she has not attended such events in years. I convinced her that no one would shun her because of past notoriety.’

Hattie lowered her voice. ‘Mrs Reynaud has always been sensitive about her face, but the happiness now shines from her.’

‘There is more to beauty than a face. I notice other things.’

‘I agree.’ Hattie shifted in her slippers, aware that the receiving line was finally moving. ‘I should rejoin my party.’

‘You promised me a dance.’ He cleared his throat. ‘As payment for arranging Rupert and Miss Parteger’s engagement.’

‘A promise is a promise.’ Hattie knew her voice sounded too bright. ‘A quadrille. It is the last ball of the summer after all. There is no harm in it.’

‘I was hoping for a waltz, but a quadrille will have to do.’

Hattie’s heart missed a beat as the image of them waltzing filled her brain. Her hand curled around her fan. She was not over him and was likely never to be over him. The knowledge thrummed through her. ‘That would not be wise.’

‘Sometimes it pays to be foolish.’ He caught her hand and lifted it to his lips.

Hattie’s mouth went dry. ‘But not tonight.’

She hurried off before he could answer.

Kit forced himself to dance with his mother, Livvy Parteger and her mother before he approached the orchestra with his request. Every fibre of his being was aware precisely where Hattie was, but the thing had to be carefully down. He was not about to risk losing her again.

When the music stopped, he walked over to her and bowed, stepping in front of Dr Hornby. ‘Our dance, I believe.’

At his look, Dr Hornby withdrew, muttering about his need to speak to someone. Kit waited.

‘The master of ceremonies hasn’t announced it. Shouldn’t we wait and find out what the figure is?’

‘Why don’t we take a chance? Unless you are afraid?’

She tilted her chin upwards. ‘I believe I am more than equal of dancing any dance with you.’

The master of ceremonies called out a Harlequin. Kit relaxed. There were a few opportunities about her waist. She would agree to listen by the end. She had to.

‘Your sister approves of the choice of dance,’ Kit remarked. ‘See how she smiles?’

Harriet glanced over her shoulder and her body completely stiffened. ‘I can’t do this. Not with everyone watching me like I’m some backward child. I’m sorry, Kit. I just can’t.’

She pulled away from him and raced from the ballroom.

Kit cursed and swiftly followed her. This time, she would hear him out.

Hattie didn’t stop until she reached the small card room. With a distinct sense of irony, she went in and pulled the door shut. She thought she could dance with him until she saw Mrs Reynaud’s and Stephanie’s faces. It was as if everyone in the ballroom was watching her and Kit with a matchmaking gleam in their eye. The last thing she wanted was for Kit to feel forced to make another proposal.

‘Harriet? Open the door.’ Kit’s voice allowed for no refusal. ‘You can’t hide for ever. Do you open it or do I knock it down?’

She went over and opened the door. Kit stood completely alone in the corridor. His hair was wild and his neckcloth askew. He had never looked handsomer. She took a step backwards.

‘You promised a dance and left before it began.’ He gave a crooked smile. ‘Are you ill? I can’t know what is wrong if you refuse to tell me.’

‘I’m sorry. In the circumstances … I thought it best. I saw Stephanie and your mother.’ Hattie hated how ineffectual and weak it sounded. She curled her hand about her fan and straightened her shoulders. ‘The music hadn’t started. I felt faint.’

‘It is a bad habit of yours, leaving before a promised dance has ended.’ He gave a heart-stopping smile. ‘We shall have to work on it. At our wedding breakfast, you will dance a full waltz with me.’

Wedding breakfast? Hattie gulped. A great black hole opened before her. She was not going back there. This time would be far worse.

‘Kit … what happened back there. You don’t have to feel that … I don’t want you to think …’

‘Hush. Listen to me. I tried being patient with you, but it hasn’t worked.’ He started to pull her into his arms, but she backed up against the card table. He let his hand drop to his side and came into the tiny room. ‘Things need to be said between us.’

‘What things?’ She looked suspiciously up at him. ‘We said everything we needed to that day. I refused your offer. You don’t really want to marry me. You don’t want to marry at all.’

‘I was wrong about many things, Harriet.’

‘But …’ Her voice trailed away at his intense look.

‘Have you examined this ring?’ he asked, holding out a small gold ring with an inlaid garnet. ‘Can you at least do that before you dismiss me out of hand?’

‘Please …’ Hattie knew her heart was breaking and she wasn’t sure how long her composure would remain. She could not take another halfhearted proposal. ‘Please, Kit, don’t make this harder for the both of us. You made your feelings or lack of them quite clear when you asked me before. Nothing has changed.’

He ran a hand through his hair. ‘I’ve gone about this all wrong. I did mean to finish the dance before I gave you the ring.’

She shrugged, but inside she died a little. She owed him an explanation of why they could never marry, even if she was utterly cast out from society and could no longer visit her family.

‘I refuse to marry because society dictates, Kit. I won’t have a loveless marriage. I made the mistake of enduring one once and I have no intention of ever entering such a thing again. What happened was not your fault. I take full responsibility for my folly. You are absolved of all blame. I’ve no idea what Stephanie has been saying, but you must ignore her.’

‘I love you, Harriet.’

‘What?’ Her heart did odd little flips. She had to have heard wrong. This was Sir Christopher Foxton who was destined never to love.

‘I love you with all my heart and soul.’ He went down on one knee. ‘Will you please make me the happiest man on earth and marry me? Please, Harriet, say yes. Say you find a small corner of your heart for me. Marry me and let me prove to you that my love is enough for the both of us. You won’t have a loveless marriage with me, I promise.’

‘You love me?’ she asked, to control the hammering of her heart. She had never expected Kit to say those words. In her wildest imaginings she thought perhaps he might care for her, but declare his love in this fashion!

‘With all my heart.’ He took her hand. ‘I did it all wrong when I made my first proposal. I should have started with the obvious facts.’

‘What are the obvious facts?’ Hattie braced herself for another onslaught of how he didn’t want to love her and was fighting against it.

‘I love you and I have no desire to live anywhere in the world without you. You make me glad that I am alive. You make me want to greet the world with a smile, instead of hiding away from it. It is why I want to marry you, so I can know that we will be together for the rest of our lives. And I want everyone else in the world to know that I have made that commitment to you.’

‘And I am supposed to believe you were going say that?’ Hattie hated the way she could not allow herself to believe, but a large part of her was afraid to believe. She had to know that this wasn’t some great sacrifice on his part which he’d regret, not tomorrow or the next day but some day in the not-too-distant future.

‘Look at the ring. I had it engraved. After what we have been through, I didn’t want to take any chances of you failing to believe my sincerity. I intend to devote my life to you. It is why I arranged Rupert and Miss Parteger’s engagement. I wanted to show you that I am capable and reliable.’

He placed the ring in the palm of her hand. She regarded the engraving on the inside. H., the keeper of my heart, K.

‘You do love me,’ she whispered finally.

‘And you? You told me that you cared for me that night after the lecture, but when I proposed you refused. Tell me what I can do to make you care for me again.’ He touched her cheek with gentle fingers. ‘Have I truly destroyed all feelings you might have had for me? Tell me it isn’t too late. I want to be the man you deserve to love. What are you afraid of? Tell me so I know how to reassure you.’

The naked longing in Kit’s voice resounded throughout the small room. He stood there, not moving towards her, but she could sense how much he wanted to gather her in his arms.

She knew then that he’d stayed in Northumberland not for his mother, but to show her that he could try to be the man she deserved. It was the little things that counted—the way he’d shown responsibility over his mother, how he was restoring the Lodge and how he’d engineered a solution for Mr Hook and Livvy that allowed them the chance to grow up before making that ultimate commitment. And she loved him all the more for it. She had been utterly blind and she had nearly thrown away the single most-important person in her life.

‘The trouble with truly loving someone is that even when your head tells you to stop, your heart keeps right on loving.’ Hattie gave a smile and knew the time was right. She no longer had to hide her feelings or wish them away. The time had come to say them out loud. ‘Yes, I love you, Kit, and suspect I always will.’

His smile could have lit a thousand lanterns.

‘You won my heart a long time ago,’ Hattie continued. ‘I think it began when you fished my gloves out of the reticule, but I didn’t really know how much I cared for you until that day when Strawberry and I jumped the stone wall. You taught me to face my fears. But there was one big hurdle I couldn’t face—declaring my love. You were right when you said that I had to face my fear.’

‘You were tardy in your love, but I shan’t hold that against you. You truly won my heart when you insisted on giving me that blasted jumping-jack at the fair. You knew what I wanted—no, what I needed. You made me into a better man, even if I kicked and screamed a bit, determined to prove you wrong.’

‘You were always that man, Kit,’ Hattie said gently. ‘You had to believe in yourself.’

‘A lesson you taught me. You showed me what loving and forgiveness was truly about.’ He put his arms about her and rested his forehead against hers. ‘You are willing to share the rest of your life with me, then?’

She threw her arms about his neck. ‘Yes, oh, yes. I will marry you.’

Kit whispered after they had soundly kissed, ‘Shall we tempt fate, Mrs Wilkinson, and return to the dance floor? I’ve no wish to cause a scandal.’

Hattie laughed up at him. ‘I will gladly dance with you.’

When they arrived back at the ballroom, the dance had finished. Hattie noticed that Kit gave a distinct nod to the master of ceremonies. As he led her out onto the floor, the man announced the next dance—a German waltz.

Her eyes flew to his. ‘You are incredibly lucky.’

‘I took precautions, yes.’ Kit rested his hand against her waist. ‘I wanted to hold you in my arms. I had anticipated moving straight on to the second dance after the quadrille, but I prefer how things worked out.’

‘You bribed the orchestra?’

‘It will be worth every penny if you stay with me. Will you dance?’

She gave a decisive nod of her head. ‘Yes, I’m feeling brave. I can risk being in your arms.’

The music swelled up around them and he began to move. Absolutely correctly and with great precision. Not even a Lady Patroness from Almack’s or the most severe duenna could fault him. They slowly circled the room.

‘As you can see, I am being utterly trustworthy,’ he remarked.

‘It makes a change.’

‘Hopefully a welcome one.’

She moved closer. ‘I am not sure what to make of it.’

‘You don’t have to make anything of it. Just dance. Let yourself be in the moment.’

‘Are you attempting to teach me something?’

‘I finished with lessons a long time ago.’ Kit concentrated on moving his feet. With each passing step, the urge to crush her to him grew. ‘I simply wanted to hold you in my arms.’

She started to pull away, but he tightened his grip, making their bodies collide.

With a whoosh, she fell against him. His body reacted instantly. He checked his movement and allowed her to find her feet.

‘I had no plans to go.’ Her voice was breathless.

‘It is good to know. Shall we continue?’ He started to move again. This time he held her closer, enjoying the way her skirts brushed against his legs as they moved around the ballroom. Looking down at her, he tried to make a memory. This was how, when they were old, he wanted to remember her—cheeks flushed, lips full and eyes sparkling, the most beautiful woman in his world.

‘Kit,’ she breathed, her lips parted slightly.

Giving in to impulse, he raised their hands to his mouth and touched her palm with his lips. A soft sigh emerged from her throat. She lifted her mouth and he bent his head. The briefest of touches.

The shocked exclamation poured ice water over Hattie, bringing her back from the enchanted bubble she had somehow existed in. The reality of where she was and what she had just done closed in around her, locking her in a prison.

‘Everyone is looking at us,’ Kit said in a low undertone.

‘What are we going to do?’

Hattie froze. She had done the unthinkable. She had shown Kit affection in public, not just affection, but a full-blown meeting of the lips!

The growing chorus of shocked gasps resounded around the ballroom, drowning out the orchestra. All Hattie wanted to do was run and hide. Kissing on the dance floor when one was twenty-seven had to rank up there as one of the more foolish things she had done in her life.

‘Leave this to me,’ Kit rasped in her ear. ‘Take off your glove.’

Hattie fumbled with the fingers. Her ring felt heavy and awkward on her hand. All the while she was conscious that everyone was watching. Even the orchestra had stopped playing. She knew that people could not see her ring. ‘What do we do now?’

Kit went down on his knee, in front of everyone. ‘Will you marry me, Mrs Wilkinson?’ he asked in a loud voice.

Hattie nodded and answered so that everyone could hear as relief washed over her. ‘Yes, of course. With all my heart.’

‘Mrs Wilkinson has just done me the honour of agreeing to become my wife,’ Kit announced. He held up her hand, with the ring clearly visible. ‘I hope you will understand and forgive the indiscretion. In my joy I was unable to stop my baser instincts.’

A growing round of applause swelled around them. Hattie looked down at him, her heart filled to bursting. With Kit, she had found her match and she knew their life together would be filled with happiness.