Читать книгу Ready for Marriage? - Anne Marie Winston - Страница 13

Six

Kristin turned and stared at the closed door. Derek? How could that be? Then she realized that it must be his Friday night on call. He and another local vet took turns covering weekends to give each other a break. But—

‘‘Where’s Mollie?’’ she asked as she pulled the door open.

‘‘Faye’s daughter Sissy is keeping her overnight since I’m on call,’’ he said tersely. ‘‘Who was that? And didn’t you ever learn you shouldn’t kiss a guy after a first date?’’

She fought back twin surges of jealousy and irritation. Mollie had never had a baby-sitter other than Kristin or Faye before. And what was he doing questioning her?

‘‘You’re getting really tiresome,’’ she told him. ‘‘How do you know that was our first date? As I know I’ve said before, I have no intention of telling you about the men in my life.’’ She lifted her chin and started to close the door in his face. ‘‘Now if that’s all you came by for, I’d like you to leave.’’

Derek slapped his palm flat against the door, easily preventing her from closing it. ‘‘Wait.’’ She heard him inhale a deep breath, then slowly release it. ‘‘Kris, just wait a minute.’’ He took a deep breath. ‘‘Can I come in?’’

She let a tense silence fall while she debated the wisdom of allowing him to enter. But finally, her desire for his company won out over common sense. ‘‘All right.’’ She stepped back and opened the door. ‘‘But one more question about anything that’s none of your business, and you’re history, buddy.’’

She hadn’t even turned on any lights yet, and the room was barely illuminated by a small crystal lamp whose base she had switched on before she left. She started to move away from him, but Derek caught her hand. ‘‘Kris?’’

‘‘What?’’ She avoided looking up at him. Her whole body was tingling with a vivid awareness of how close he was, her breathing coming ridiculously fast, her pulse hammering. Why couldn’t she have had this reaction when Rod kissed her? Derek had barely touched her and already he’d gotten more of a physical response from her than poor Rod had the entire evening.

It was a joke, she decided. A great big cosmic trick, that she would have such intense, serious hots for the one guy who absolutely didn’t want her.

Well, perhaps he wanted her, she thought, recalling that heated kiss in his kitchen, but he didn’t want to, which might be even worse.

Then Derek took her other hand and turned her toward him, and she forgot about everything else. ‘‘I’m sorry,’’ he said, and his voice rang with sincerity. ‘‘I didn’t come over here to fight with you.’’

She nodded once. ‘‘Apology accepted.’’ She hesitated. ‘‘So why did you come here tonight? It’s not exactly a prime visiting hour.’’

He smiled, clearly recognizing the conversational olive branch she was extending. ‘‘I was called in for an emergency this evening and I just finished. I don’t really know why I’m here. I just…came by.’’

He sounded as baffled as she felt. ‘‘All right.’’ She strove for normalcy despite the fact that he was still holding both her hands. ‘‘Would you like some iced tea? I made decaf yesterday.’’

He shook his head. ‘‘No tea.’’ His hands tightened as he pulled her closer. ‘‘Did you enjoy his kiss?’’

She stiffened immediately, averting her face, but he ignored her struggles, folding her against him and holding her there with disgusting ease.

‘‘I hope not.’’ His breath was warm in her ear, his voice a rough velvet rope twining around her and inexorably drawing her closer. ‘‘The first time I kissed you, you enjoyed it. So did I. I haven’t been able to think about anything but kissing you since then.’’ He cupped her cheek in one big hand and tipped up her chin with his thumb, and his eyes were dark and intense. ‘‘I didn’t come here for tea or talk, Kris. I came for your kiss.’’

Dear God. How was she supposed to resist an admission like that? She felt her resistance melt away as if it had never been, and she relaxed against him as he drew her even closer. She grazed the hard line of his jaw with her lips, loving the feel of his haven’t-shaved-since-morning stubble. ‘‘Then what are you waiting for?’’ she murmured.

His belly heaved with a silent laugh as he pulled her more securely into his arms and lowered his head. And then his lips found hers, and just like the first time, her whole body exploded into a sizzling, crackling whirl of heat.

This time, she was ready. This time, she lifted herself on tiptoe so that the hard ridge of his arousal fit snugly into the vee where her thighs met, and they both gasped at the exquisite sensation. Lightning exploded through her body, unerringly striking the sensitive flesh between her legs. Without thinking, she twisted against him, increasing the sweet pleasure.

Derek rolled his hips against her and his tongue echoed the thrust as he sought her response. He deepened the kiss, his powerful arms cradling her, one hand sliding down to cup her bottom and pull her even harder against him. She tore her mouth from his, gasping as her head fell back. He barely paused, simply transferred his attention to the slender line of her throat, and she felt his hot mouth tracing a fiery trail down over the slope of her breast. He cupped her breast in one hand and she cried out, arching in his arms as he rubbed a thumb roughly back and forth across her nipple.

And then, with no warning, he froze. His whole big body went rigid against her.

‘‘Derek?’’

In response, he lifted his head. One hand still held her clasped against him but the other fumbled at the back pocket of his pants until he’d extracted—

His pager. He peered at the number displayed, and she felt him heave a sigh.

Above her head, he said, ‘‘May I use your phone?’’

‘‘Sure.’’ Her legs were trembling as she stepped back, but he didn’t let go of her hand as he crossed the room, and she nearly stumbled as he towed her behind him.

He picked up the handset and punched in the number with his thumb, then leaned against the doorframe and pulled her to him again.

Bemused, she slipped her arms around his lean waist and put her head on his chest.

‘‘This is Dr. Mahoney,’’ he said into the phone, the deep tones of his voice rumbling in her ear. As he listened, he slowly straightened. ‘‘All right. I’ll be there in five minutes.’’

He set down the receiver and she felt him sigh again as he put his arm back around her. He rested his chin atop her head. ‘‘I have to go. Dog hit by car.’’

‘‘Anyone I know?’’ She strove for a normal tone, but inside her entire body was quivering with pleasure and happiness.

‘‘Doubt it,’’ he said. ‘‘New clients a month ago.’’ He leaned back and looked down at her, and even in the dim light she could see his serious expression. ‘‘Tonight changes things.’’

She regarded him soberly. ‘‘Does it?’’ She’d thought that after the first time he’d kissed her and look where that had left her.

‘‘Have lunch with me tomorrow? We can order in if you like.’’

‘‘How about I bring lunch?’’ she offered. ‘‘Would you like me to pick up Mollie or will you have time?’’

His expression changed, a small, private smile slipping over his features, and she felt something low in her abdomen contract sharply in response. ‘‘I’m not inviting Mollie,’’ he said. ‘‘She can join us for dinner like we planned. It’s about time you and I had the occasional meeting without a pint-size chaperone.’’

‘‘Oh.’’ It was hard to take a deep breath, and she hoped he couldn’t hear her heart pounding as if she’d just run a five-minute mile. She was very conscious of his hard, lean frame pressed against her, and she wondered why he seemed to be taking this all so in stride. ‘‘All right, then. I’ll meet you at the clinic.’’

‘‘Sounds good.’’ He dipped his head and pressed one short, hard kiss against her mouth, withdrawing and releasing her before she could respond. ‘‘Noon tomorrow. See you then.’’

‘‘See you then,’’ she echoed as he turned and strode to the door.

‘‘Lock it behind me,’’ he instructed before he pulled it shut behind him.

She rolled her eyes fondly as she crossed to the door. Then the full impact of his visit hit her, and her hands began to shake. She locked the door and sank down on the first step of the small landing that led to her second floor.

Had she dreamed what had just happened? Slowly she lifted her hand and touched her fingers to her lips. Derek had kissed her.

Again.

And it hadn’t been an impulse that he’d regretted the instant it had ended, either. He’d admitted as much.

A bubble of nervous laughter rolled up and slipped out before she could catch it. Good grief. If one little kiss did this to her…

Only it hadn’t been one little kiss. It had been several, and anything but small if the solid feel of Derek’s body pressed against hers was any indication. Her stomach fluttered as she relived the way he’d ground himself against her, the rasp of his thumb stimulating her nipple.

That page was probably the only reason she wasn’t lying naked on her living room rug right this very moment! The thought made her shiver again with helpless anticipation. She’d been practically mindless, responding completely to his touch and taste, overpowered by the reality that exceeded her girlish dreams of making love with Derek. In another minute, she’d have yanked her shirt up and out of the way and offered herself to him.

She dropped her face into her hands and blew out a frustrated breath. Her whole body was humming with arousal. It was a good thing she’d never known exactly how he could make her feel or she might have jumped him months ago.

No. She sobered immediately. Derek hadn’t been ready for her months ago. In fact, he hadn’t been ready for her a few weeks ago, when she’d first brought up the notion of changing their relationship.

Even tonight, he hadn’t sounded sure of his course of action. Even if his body knew exactly what it wanted, Derek was still trying to cope with the sudden shift of reality around him.

She knew it was hard for him to let go of Deb. But she couldn’t help hoping. Especially after tonight! She couldn’t help thinking that perhaps he soon would be ready to live again.

She’d known and loved Deb, too. They’d spent hours together, as close as the sisters neither of them had ever had. And she was positive that Deb wouldn’t have wanted Derek to be alone forever. Maybe it was just rationalizing her feelings, but she believed that Deb would be happy that she loved Derek so much. That she would want them to marry and give Mollie the family she would have had if Deb had lived.

And whether or not he was ready to admit it, he wanted to move on, too. In an about-face that still stole her breath when she thought about it, he’d come to her tonight. He’d admitted he couldn’t stop thinking about her. That he wanted to kiss her. That was a huge step forward.

And tomorrow would be another. He’d asked her to come and have lunch with him.

Oh, she’d taken sandwiches by, had actually packed him a lunch, many times in the past. And she and Mollie had run by to visit at lunch countless times as well.

But he hadn’t asked her to pack him a lunch, or to bring Mollie. He wanted to see her. Just her. She flopped backward onto the landing and kicked her legs into the air in a ridiculous moment of joyous anticipation.

‘‘Hi, everyone.’’ She closed the back door of the veterinary clinic behind her the following day at noon.

She was answered by a chorus of greetings from the receptionists and technicians buzzing around the front desk area.

Sandy glanced up with a smile. ‘‘No Mollie?’’

‘‘No Mollie,’’ Kristin confirmed.

‘‘Hey, Kristin.’’ Faye waved at her, then pointed toward the hallway. ‘‘Derek said to tell you to go on into his office and he’d be in when he could get away. Someone just came by with Chinese takeout.’’ She checked her watch. ‘‘He’s not running far behind today. Just give him a few minutes.’’ She grinned at Kristin, then silently lifted her right hand in a fist with the thumb extended upward.

Kristin smiled in return, hoping the rest of the staff hadn’t interpreted Faye’s meaning, then walked back along the hallway to the door of Derek’s office.

The bags of Chinese food were parked on the edge of his desk, so she opened them and began taking the lids off things, tearing open the bags of plastic utensils and laying out the containers of different items.

When the door opened, she spun around. Her heart leaped into her throat and hung there, pounding, while Derek closed the door with a quiet click. ‘‘Hi.’’

‘‘H-hi.’’ She had to clear her throat. ‘‘I, ah, I brought several résumés along. The board hasn’t advertised the position yet but some of them have invited people they thought might be qualified for the executive director’s position to apply. Anyway, they wanted your opinion.’’

He hung his lab coat on a hook and started across the room. There was a warm, intent expression in his eyes that scattered her thoughts and she felt her pulse began to increase its rhythm.

‘‘My opinion?’’ As he reached her, he slid his arms around her waist and drew her to him, lowering his head. ‘‘My opinion is that if I don’t kiss you again soon I’m going to go crazy.’’

She wasn’t ready! Automatically she lifted her arms, palms out in a futile and halfhearted attempt to stop him. It seemed silly, given the way she’d pined for him for so long. But she felt self-conscious and uncomfortable in his arms. They were right here in his office. Anyone could walk in.

Then his lips touched hers and she knew that self-conscious or not, she wasn’t going to be able to control her response to him, wasn’t going to be able to moderate the need that welled up from deep inside her. Rather than holding him stiffly at arm’s length, her hands smoothed up over his shoulders to clasp the back of his neck and slide deep into his hair. She pressed her body urgently against his, shuddering at the feel of his hard, steely frame imprinting itself on her softer one.

His lips were urgent, persuasive, and she opened her mouth helplessly, letting him deepen the kiss in an erotic harbinger of lovemaking. It felt, somehow, as if she’d never really lived before these past few days in his arms. As if she’d been asleep in a walled tower like a fairy-tale princess, waiting for the right kiss to bring her to life.

She was alive now. Oh, she certainly was! Immersed in the wonderful sensation of being touched by the one man in the world who could make her feel so complete, she didn’t protest when his fingers slipped beneath the edge of her short blouse. His hand was warm and sure as he traced small circular patterns on her sensitive flesh, his fingers trailing breath-stealing streaks of pleasure wherever they lit. His hand moved up her torso as he kissed her relentlessly, demanding her response as he sought out each rib, slowly exploring her until he was brushing the full undercurve of her breast. He paused there momentarily, lightly brushing his thumb back and forth. Finally, his thumb ventured higher, gently rubbing her stiff and aching nipple through the lacy bra she wore, and her back arched involuntarily as hot, liquid desire shot straight down to the sensitive apex of her thighs.

A small moan escaped her. The sound startled her and interrupted the daze of desire, and she came out of the sensual moment long enough to grab his wrist. ‘‘Wait. Someone might come in.’’

Derek stilled, his mouth and his hand both frozen in place. Finally, he pulled his mouth away from hers, shaking his head as if shaking off a hypnotic spell as he slowly, reluctantly withdrew his hand, caressing her gently as he tugged her blouse back into place. ‘‘Whoa. I’m sorry.’’ He blew out a dazed breath as he shook his head. ‘‘That got…a little out of hand.’’

‘‘A little?’’ Her laugh was shaky as she straightened her shirt.

He stroked a hand down the unruly length of her hair and released her, smiling crookedly. ‘‘You sit over there.’’ He backed away from her, waving toward the chair on the other side of the desk. ‘‘I don’t trust myself when you’re within reach.’’

I don’t trust myself when you’re within reach. It was true. The muscles of his belly tightened as he looked across the desk at her.

Her hair was a wild, curly tangle and her eyes glowed with warmth. Her lips were red and swollen and there was a pink flush along her jawbone where his beard stubble had abraded her tender skin. He hadn’t meant to do that, and he suffered a momentary remorse at marking her. The scariest part was that he couldn’t even remember how it had happened.

God! She exploded in his arms, her response a sweet, honest welcome that made it difficult for him to remember his own name, let alone anything else. He’d been celibate by choice in the years since his wife had died and now his body felt as if he were ready to make up for all the thousands of lonely hours in one hot, steamy, endless night.

To distract himself, he said, ‘‘Tell me about these applicants while we eat.’’

‘‘All right.’’ Kristin pushed a set of utensils at him. He was grateful that she accepted the change of subject so easily. It gave him time to come to grips with the way his world had changed.

A sexual relationship. With Kris. Giving voice to the idea, even if it was only in his head, gave him pause. Was he really thinking of having an affair with her?

He knew how he’d feel if she were contemplating such a course with any other man, and he wasn’t sure he even liked himself very much for considering her that way. God, this whole situation was making him crazy. Deliberately, he forced himself to set aside his churning thoughts. Kristin didn’t appear to be the least bit conflicted as she prepared plates of the Chinese food for each of them. Maybe he was making too big a deal out of the whole thing.

As they ate, she detailed the three individuals who had applied for the executive directorship.

None of them, in his opinion, sounded like what the sanctuary needed. ‘‘I’d like to see them hire someone who can take the sanctuary to a new level,’’ he told her. ‘‘Someone with experience in fund-raising and marketing. Someone who sees expanding our sights beyond the local efforts in a positive light.’’

‘‘What do you mean, ‘beyond the local efforts’?’’ She was studying him, her intelligent green eyes assessing as she considered his words.

‘‘State-wide. Nationally, even.’’ He hunted through one of the stacks of literature on his desk, coming up with the magazine he wanted. ‘‘This is from a nationally known animal sanctuary in Utah. They get grants, enormous bequests, stuff like that. They have tons of clever programs that encourage people to donate to special projects. And they offer how-to seminars on everything from fund-raising to feral cat colonies.’’ He tapped the magazine with a finger. ‘‘You should look at this.’’

‘‘I will.’’ She took it from him and laid it aside, concentrating on her food. ‘‘I’ve been thinking about the next director, too. I’m going to recommend to the board that they create a contract with a definite end date and a set of goals they’d like to see accomplished in that time. That way, they’ll be able to measure how well someone is working out and give themselves a way to release an employee who isn’t living up to expectations. If we were to hire someone like you’re talking about, that would be a vital part of the contract.’’

His eyebrows rose. ‘‘Great idea.’’ He cleared his throat, remembering a conversation he’d had with Rusty a few days before. ‘‘Have you considered staying in the position?’’

She cocked her head. ‘‘Permanently?’’

He nodded. ‘‘Rusty mentioned to me that the board wanted to ask you to accept the job for good.’’

‘‘He hinted at it.’’ She shook her head. ‘‘Not interested. Although I’m enjoying the challenge, I still want to keep my accounting practice. I’m actually planning on expanding it once you find the right person for the executive director’s job.’’

‘‘Expanding it?’’ He had never really spoken much with Kris about her work, he realized with a pang of guilt. Most of the time, they talked about Mollie or about things that went on in his practice, about the upkeep of his home or about the sanctuary. He couldn’t remember the last time it had occurred to him to ask her about her goals and dreams.

She nodded. ‘‘I can go full-time. It would be a nice leap in my income level, let me finally get out from under—oh, never mind. I’m sure this is boring you to tears.’’ Her gaze slid away from his and she concentrated on her food. ‘‘Tell me how Mollie is doing. Are you still planning on looking for another private sitter?’’

Derek studied her in silence. What the heck had just happened? She’d been discussing her business when suddenly she’d stopped making eye contact, her posture had changed from relaxed and easy to straight-backed and rigid, and she’d fixed on a bright, fake smile that he didn’t think he’d ever seen before. ‘‘Yeah,’’ he finally said. ‘‘I still need a sitter. But Mollie’s enjoyed day care so much I’m thinking of signing her up for preschool a couple of days a week. It’ll be part of the sitter’s job to take her and pick her up.’’

The odd smile faded from Kristin’s face and a genuine, far more familiar frown replaced it. ‘‘You mean you’re going to let a total stranger drive her around?’’

‘‘Well, yeah.’’ Although he hadn’t really even considered that aspect of the idea.

‘‘What if the person has an old rattletrap of a car? How will you know if he or she has a safe driving record? What will you do about a car seat—?’’

‘‘Hold on!’’ He held up one hand, palm out. ‘‘This is just something I was considering. I haven’t interviewed anyone yet, and I honestly hadn’t even thought about car safety. Do you want to help me put together a list of questions?’’

She nodded immediately. ‘‘Sure. And as long as I’m making suggestions, why don’t you see if there are any agencies in the area that provide nannies? We’d still want to conduct our own interviews and check references, but at least we’d know they’d come recommended with some initial screening done.’’

We. Two little letters that made one very simple word. But something in the way she said it struck him like a bolt of lightning from a cloudless sky. We. When had it begun to sound so good to him?

He finished his meal, then came around the desk and held out his hand to her.

She looked at his outstretched hand, then up at his face. Slowly, she placed her palm in his and let him draw her to her feet.

Neither of them said a word. Still holding her gaze, he drew her into his arms and lowered his head. The moment his lips touched hers, he felt the same thrill as he had before. The irresistible call of desire, of need and passion and heat and all the things he’d missed for so long and had found in her arms. He kissed her deeply, plunging his tongue into her mouth in search of her uniquely exciting response, delighting in her slick, soft flavor. His hands slid down her back, stopping just above the sweet swell of her bottom. His palms practically itched with the need to slide farther down and cup the soft globes, but this wasn’t the place to grope her like an adolescent boy. The last thing he wanted to do was make her uncomfortable. Besides, if he started, he wasn’t at all sure he’d be able to stop. So much for noble motives.

He reached up and tugged lightly on her arms, drawing them down from his neck and holding them between their bodies. ‘‘Much as I’d like to do this for the rest of the day, I’ve got to get back to work.’’

Kristin’s eyes were soft and dazed, her lips red and full. She blew out a breath as her forehead dropped to rest against his chest. ‘‘It’s probably just as well,’’ she muttered.

He found he didn’t like the sound of that sentiment. ‘‘Why?’’

She looked up at him, her tone mildly exasperated. ‘‘Derek, it hardly seems fair for me to be kissing you like this. You know I’m dating several men right now and I’m certainly not carrying on with them like I just did with you.’’

I’m dating several men. A primal surge of jealousy and possessiveness rushed through him. ‘‘You’d better not be.’’ His voice sounded thick and rough to his own ears, and he didn’t wait for her to respond before he bent his head and took her mouth again. He released her wrists and took her by the hips, tugging her firmly against his body, knowing she couldn’t miss the pulsing column of arousal that hadn’t completely subsided since he’d walked into the room. The hell with not making her uncomfortable. She could damn well feel as uncomfortable as he did right now.

‘‘No more dating,’’ he said, lifting his mouth a breath from hers. ‘‘I told you the other night that things have changed.’’

‘‘But—’’

‘‘This is going to be an exclusive relationship,’’ he told her.

‘‘Exclusive in what way?’’

God, did the woman have to argue with every word that came out of his mouth? ‘‘Neither of us is going to see anyone else from now on.’’

She frowned. ‘‘You weren’t seeing anyone before. I’m the only one who’s concerned about my life passing me by.’’ Her eyes looked suspiciously moist. ‘‘I can’t just be your sexual toy, Derek.’’

He rubbed his hands up and down over the slender line of her back, feeling the delicate bone structure beneath his palms. Despite her youth, Kristin was one of the most capable, competent women he’d ever known. He thought of her as self-assured, as sturdy and indestructible.

Perhaps too much so. He’d ignored her need for reassurance, for support and commitment because it hadn’t occurred to him that she needed those things. Now he knew she did. She was as vulnerable, in her way, as any other woman.

A fatalistic sense of calm descended, and he knew what he was going to say mere moments before he opened his mouth. ‘‘I don’t want you to be a sexual toy. I want you to be my wife.’’