Читать книгу Royals Untamed! - Andie Brock, Annie West - Страница 10

CHAPTER TWO

THE SMALL FLAT became invaded with the essence of Kazim, that raw power which had attracted Amber from the moment they’d met. His presence seeped into every corner and Amber shivered. The flat was too confined to contain him. He belonged to the desert with its vast wildness. Nothing or nobody would ever completely tame him. The realisation hurtled at her. They were worlds apart.

The babysitter, totally in awe of Kazim, hurriedly left and a heavy silence filled the air as he looked at Amber, his eyes sharp and soul-piercing. Amber had to face what was coming; it was the only way to be able to put the past behind her. If she didn’t, she’d never move on in life, never be able to find that elusive dream of happiness and love elsewhere.

‘Do your family know you are living like this?’ The door had barely clicked closed behind the babysitter before his words were out, sharp and insistent.

His anger seemed to make him grow taller, his shoulders broader, much more intimidating. An impatient sigh escaped him as his mouth set in a stern line and he folded his arms across his chest.

She would not let his regal show of power unnerve her, and met his gaze for a second or two. It felt like an eternity as his eyes bored into hers.

‘Quietly—Claude’s sleeping,’ Amber said softly in an attempt to defuse the increasing tension and walked into the kitchen, dropping her bag in the usual place. She turned and looked up into Kazim’s face, wild and thunderous as he stood in the doorway, realising she hadn’t acknowledged his question, let alone answered it.

‘I’m not asking about the child.’ His words came out in a gravelly attempt at a whisper, the heady scent of male wrapping itself around her.

‘Where I live has nothing to do with you, Kazim.’ She stood firm, refusing to be intimidated.

He took another step closer and she couldn’t help but move back against the kitchen cupboards, the small room totally dominated by him. He was too close and she couldn’t think straight, not when his intoxicating maleness invaded every pore in her body, making her want something she could never have. Something she should never have allowed herself to imagine.

‘Keep your voice down,’ she whispered harshly, hoping it would hide the colour creeping across her face. Would he guess her thoughts, know just how much he affected her?

‘How can you have turned your back so easily on your family? Your country?’ Anger sparked in Kazim’s eyes and she wanted to look away, but couldn’t. She had to be strong, had to face him head-on.

‘You dare to ask that when you sent me away just hours after we were married?’ Indignation rose up, fuelling her anger until it matched his. Had he any idea how humiliating it had been to go back to her parents because he didn’t want her?

She pushed aside those raw emotions, unable to deal with them right now. He’d dismissed her as a wife and as a woman and she should hate him for that. She did, but she couldn’t stem the sizzle of awareness that raced between them, stronger now than it had ever been.

‘But to live here, in a place like this, with a woman and her child? I’m assuming your friend is not married.’ The disgust on his face mirrored that which she’d seen on her wedding night as she’d tried to be anything but a naïve virgin.

‘You assume right,’ she said, glaring up at him.

Amber thought of little Claude, always with a sunny smile despite his continued health problems. He’d captured her heart from the moment she had first met him, much like Kazim had done, but she couldn’t allow her thoughts to wander there again. She had to stay completely focused on this moment and the brooding and overpowering presence of the man she’d married out of duty to her family.

She couldn’t drag her gaze away as Kazim looked at his watch, his jacket sleeve pulling up to reveal a tanned wrist, dusted with dark hair. Amber’s stomach fluttered and she practically had to force herself to think clearly. After all he’d done, all he’d said on their wedding day, she couldn’t believe he was still able to give her butterflies and make her head light.

She’d never wanted any man the way she wanted Kazim, and that had to change if she was going to be able to move on in life. But while Kazim still held her foolish heart she’d never be able to look at another man and feel this sizzle of hot desire.

‘Where does the child’s mother work? At this hour?’ He raised a brow at her and she wished he would step back, give her space to think, because having him so close was making that impossible right now. If she closed her eyes for just a moment, she was sure his musky aftershave alone would transport her back to the desert. A place she’d turned her back on for good.

‘At the club.’ Amber knew it was nearly time for Annie to come home and part of her wanted that to happen right now, but another, more rebellious, side wanted to keep that moment at bay for as long as possible. But if Annie did come home, at least then she could go somewhere else to talk with this man, somewhere bigger, a place that didn’t heighten his power and command so dramatically.

‘She is a stripper?’ His accent deepened and the hard angles of his face furrowed into a scowl as once more he jumped to conclusions.

‘They are dancers, Kazim; they dance, they don’t strip.’ She flew instantly to Annie’s defence, using the exact same words her manager had used as he’d tried to lure her to dance, insisting her pay would increase substantially.

‘So your little stunt on our wedding night was a dance?’ His voice had deepened and turned husky, making her stomach flutter uncontrollably as he reminded her once again of that night. He stepped closer, invading her mind, her body and her soul.

She looked up at him and saw that the black depths of his eyes had changed, swirling with something new, something undefinable. She was mesmerised, unable to think at all, stunned into silence.

‘Do you remember?’ he asked, his voice softer than she’d ever heard it as he lifted her chin, forcing her to look into his eyes. She became swallowed up by the fire she now saw there. ‘You danced then.’

This couldn’t be happening. She didn’t want it to happen; she couldn’t let it happen. What she needed was to be free of him and letting him touch her, letting him look into her eyes with such potent need, eroded every last bit of determination she had.

‘I did not dance or strip,’ she flung at him, infuriated by the way her body reacted to his touch. But at the same time she didn’t want him to stop. Attack, she decided, was the best form of defence. ‘I was doing what I thought was right, what I thought a man of your reputation would want.’

‘A man of my reputation?’ He said the words slowly and suspiciously, as if he couldn’t believe she was using such a thing against him.

‘I was sure an innocent woman was not what you were used to.’ She looked right into the depths of his eyes, boldly challenging him to deny what she said. ‘I was certain you wouldn’t have wanted me—a virgin bride—and I was right.’

She saw his face harden, saw his jaw clench. She was right—he hadn’t wanted her, an innocent bride, but neither had he wanted her when she’d hidden behind her attempt at seduction.

‘Or is it that I just didn’t fit into your world?’ She threw the question at him. ‘Is it because I have English blood in my veins?’

His silence spoke volumes, but she ploughed on, trying to ignore the intensity in his eyes.

‘My mother may be English but she has adopted the ways of the desert to the extent that she wanted our marriage as much as our fathers did.’

* * *

Kazim looked into Amber’s beautiful face, imagining how her soft skin would feel on his fingertips, and wondered how she could think that, let alone say it. For the entire duration of his wedding day he’d been consumed by need for his young bride; her innocence had been so beguiling. It was as if she’d cast a spell on him, but a spell he had no intention of slipping under. He didn’t dare.

He’d fought her magic so well that, by the time they were alone, he was once more the totally in control desert prince who took only what he needed. It wasn’t until she’d dropped her act of purity, throwing herself at him, flaunting her body so brazenly that he knew he couldn’t live a lie, and that the rumours of her time in boarding school must have been true.

What if he was like his father? Anger had surfaced, threatening to break out like a captured wild animal. Alarm bells had gone off. She’d already roused his passion with her dance and it had mixed potently with anger at her deception.

The marriage had been a mistake—one he was certain his father was well aware of and had forced him into, testing his loyalty to family and country. All he’d been able to think of was that he didn’t want to be responsible for breaking such spirit. He didn’t want to replicate what he’d witnessed as a young boy.

In a desperate attempt to make Amber see reason, Kazim’s words had been harsher than he’d intended. He had used her alluring dance and attempts to seduce him as an excuse. To make her believe that he was sending her back to her family because she wasn’t the meek and biddable bride he’d thought she had been.

Amber hadn’t shown any shock as he’d told her their duty was done, that she must return to her homeland. In fact she hadn’t shown any emotion at all, had shut him out. Had she been relieved she didn’t have to stay in Barazbin?

If he closed his eyes long enough, he could still picture her, seductively removing the silk that had clung so temptingly to her body, as if it was something she was used to doing. Didn’t her present job confirm that?

He’d been unable to move, unable to stop her, telling himself that her actions would help. They had both needed the marriage as much as the other and consummation wasn’t optional. But still he hadn’t been able to touch her, let alone make her his. He was the son of a cruel, hard sheikh and he had no intention of crushing her beautiful spirit as savagely as his mother’s had been. It was why he would never allow himself to love or be loved.

‘You most definitely danced,’ Kazim said, his voice deep and husky with the memory of that night, but not completely caught up in the moment. ‘Piece by piece, you removed the silk that covered your body.’

‘It was not a dance, Kazim, merely a necessary smokescreen. I tried to be something I wasn’t. I tried to tempt you.’ She looked up into his eyes, her almond-shaped ones searching his, and he had the urge to touch her face, feel her skin beneath his fingertips. ‘But you made it clear that the idea of such an act repulsed you.’

‘Repulsed me?’ He lowered his hand before temptation got the better of him, and looked into her eyes. How on earth could she think that? Hanging onto his control that night had been the hardest thing he’d ever done, but necessary. He’d wanted her so much but was stunned to realise the palace gossips had been right. A virgin bride would never know how to act so enticingly. ‘I never expected such a show of...knowledge.’

‘I made one mistake, Kazim, and because of that you didn’t want me. You just wanted me for who I was, for the benefits to your kingdom the marriage brought.’ Her eyes held an accusing light as she narrowed them slightly. ‘Were you secretly glad you could banish me from your life?’

If only she knew. He’d wanted her with a carnal need that had beat like a drum inside him, demanding satisfaction, but he’d restrained himself. To protect her.

He could still see clearly the image of her slender body, almost naked, as she’d tossed the silks of her wedding veils across the floor. Transfixed, he’d watched while she’d pulled too hard at the final piece, the silk tearing. She’d thrown it aside, a teasing look on her face as their eyes met. He’d demanded she stop with a harshness he was unaccustomed to and, from the wounded look on her face, neither was she. He’d sounded cruel and hard, exactly like his father.

She had disappeared into the bathroom. When she came out, her glorious body wrapped in a towelling robe, his passion, aroused by her dance, hadn’t needed any further invitation. Again he’d resisted, using his anger as a shield. Whatever the reason for her behaviour, he couldn’t take advantage of her. If they came together as man and wife, it would be because they both wanted to provide Barazbin with future heirs. Passion and desire didn’t have any place in their marriage.

As dawn had crept across the sky he’d abandoned the idea of sleeping in the chair and stood beside the bed, watching the woman he’d married, one he’d wanted but couldn’t have. He’d savoured the soft sighs she’d made in her sleep, the sweetness of her face, because they would never be his. He’d done his duty. He’d married her, but he couldn’t stay with a woman who deceived him, hid her past. Not when she could provoke him so easily. For her sake, she must leave.

‘The validity of our marriage was never questioned, even after you left,’ he said, dragging his mind back. He stepped away from her before he gave into the urge to kiss her. He’d never tasted her lips, never felt them burn with passion beneath his and right now it was all he could think about. ‘What you did that night, your discarded clothes, it worked. Nobody has ever challenged the marriage.’

‘I wish it hadn’t.’ She tossed the words at him as she moved out of the kitchen, her arm brushing against his in the small space. In the dim light of the hallway he watched her take off her coat and hang it up, drawn to the way the denim of her jeans clung to her long legs. ‘I will admit what I did. Explain exactly what happened then you can annul the marriage.’

He shook his head and followed her into the hallway. ‘It’s too late for that, Amber.’ He couldn’t allow her to bring their marriage into question. Ever.

She turned to look at him, her face partly shadowed by the dim light in the hallway but her words defiantly clear. ‘I can’t go back to Barazbin. I don’t want to. I’m needed here.’

Everything had changed so much and he was to blame. He was the only heir to the throne and his father was sick. For the sake of his country he didn’t have time to end one marriage and make another. He needed to be seen with his wife—the woman his people had witnessed him marry, the one they’d welcomed warmly. To annul the marriage now would make his people doubt him. If he couldn’t hold together a marriage, how could he rule a country?

‘People may not believe your claim if your profession is discovered. Do you really want that scandal exposed? Your father’s people, as well as mine, would turn their backs on you.’ He let the words sink in, watched as her lovely eyes widened in shock. ‘The only thing that can save your reputation now is me.’

‘You’re despicable,’ she whispered, every syllable full of contempt. With barely contained fury in every step, she walked a few paces to another door, opened it and peered into the near darkness.

As she slipped into the darkened room he remembered the child and irrational anger consumed him once more. Why was she living here, sharing a cramped flat with a single mother who worked as a stripper? Was she trying to blacken her reputation beyond redemption?

Kazim stood and composed himself, steeling himself against the irrational anger that raged inside. He clenched his fists and closed his eyes, willing control to return.

Moments later, composure seeped through him and, unable to help himself, he pushed the door open a little wider to reveal Amber tucking a young boy into a tiny bed. The child murmured in his sleep and she ruffled his blond hair before pressing a kiss to his forehead. From the little he knew of children, he guessed the boy to be around two.

When Amber looked up her eyes met Kazim’s and something akin to embarrassment briefly washed over him at having witnessed the tender moment. He’d intruded. The shock on her face told him that, but he wasn’t going to let her off so lightly. He stood and looked back at her, his stomach turning against the thought of what could have been if he’d succumbed to his desire, if they’d had a child as a result of their wedding night. He didn’t want to be a father, to expose a child to the same upset he’d known, but his position in life meant fatherhood was an obligation. He had to have a child—an heir to Barazbin.

In the dim light of the room he couldn’t see her expression clearly. ‘If you don’t mind...’ Amber whispered so softly he almost missed the words.

In silent agreement he stepped back a pace. The child’s bedroom was not the place for such discussions so he left, pulling the door closed again, and walked back to the depressing and claustrophobic kitchen, all sorts of questions racing through his mind.

Moments later, she stood in the doorway, hands on hips, her body poised as if ready for battle. ‘Give me one good reason why I should care what your people say of me, why I should care if my reputation is ruined, as you so nicely put it?’ Fighting spirit resounded in her voice but he refused to rise to the bait.

‘Your family.’

* * *

Pain lanced through Amber as she looked at Kazim’s questioning face. ‘I haven’t seen my family since the day after we got married.’

The day you rejected me as if I were an unwanted parcel.

When her father had sent her away she’d begged her mother to help her, but her mother, committed to the ways of the desert, had turned her back on her, just as she had the Western world from which she’d come. To Amber’s mother, arranged marriages were now normal and acceptable. It was as if she was trying to erase her English ancestry and, along with it, the scrapes her daughter, Amber, had got into at boarding school.

Lost in thought, Kazim’s next words hurtled her back to reality, dragging her back from the hurt of her parents’ rejection and disappointment.

‘So you turned your back on your family as well as your heritage, to come to Paris and work in a club.’ He folded his arms across his chest, his dark eyes glaring accusingly at her, and she thought he was going to taunt her again, almost force her to admit to being a stripper instead of a waitress.

Did he really think she’d willingly left everyone behind?

She deflected the hurt, just as she had done on their wedding day, allowing all that pain to turn to anger. If he wanted to think badly of her then it could only help her cause to be free. He might be the man she’d loved from first sight, the man she’d dreamed of raising a family with, but he was also the man who would never love her. It was time she accepted that and moved on.

‘Where I work and what I do there is irrelevant,’ she snapped at him, wishing she’d never let him into the flat. But this needed finishing; she needed to be free of him. ‘What is important is that here, with the two people who mean more to me than anyone else, I am needed and wanted.’

The only other person who’d ever made her feel needed and wanted was her grandmother, and Amber had missed her terribly since she’d passed away. So, since Annie and little Claude had stumbled into her life, Amber was happy for the first time in many years. They more than made up for the fact that the only job she could get without proof of identity was in the club.

‘You are needed in Barazbin.’ Like an arrow, his reply shot across the room, the words wounding deeply.

‘Needed, maybe,’ she said in a soft teasing voice, her head to one side as she shrugged her shoulders, trying hard to appear indifferent. ‘But not wanted, Kazim. Not by you.’

‘My father is ill,’ he said, his face paling and his eyes becoming haunted. For a moment she felt his pain, wanted to reach out to him, but she couldn’t. To show such weakness would be fatal. ‘It is my duty to secure the future of Barazbin.’

‘That still doesn’t have to include me, not when we haven’t seen each other since our wedding day. You even admitted my reputation would be brought into question. Your duty doesn’t have to include me.’ She clung to the hope that he would see she was far from suitable to be his princess, especially now. But his decisive stance warned her that such hope was futile.

‘You are my wife.’ He stepped towards her, the words coming out slowly and firmly, the air around her becoming thick and heavy as he towered over her, making breathing normally difficult. ‘And you will come back with me.’

Amber sighed. When was he going to get it? To understand he couldn’t just dismiss her from his life then drag her back into it when it suited him? ‘That little boy needs me.’ She pointed towards the bedroom door where Claude lay sleeping.

‘And why is it so important that you are here, when you are not his mother?’ He sounded angry now, as if his patience had slipped away to nothing. ‘If I didn’t know better, I would question exactly whose child it is.’

How could he even think such a thing? She had never been intimate with a man. All she’d done was heed her mother’s warning of Kazim’s reputation with women and had tried to be something she wasn’t. A seductress. The disgust she’d seen on Kazim’s face plagued her still.

Amber groaned heavily, tired of talking in circles, and repeated herself. ‘I’m staying here, Kazim, where I’m needed and wanted.’

‘Why?’ Suspicion laced the word and she knew he wouldn’t give up until he knew the truth.

‘Claude needs an operation. A life-changing operation, one that will mean he can walk and grow up as normally as possible.’ As much as she tried, she couldn’t keep the passion from her voice. Meeting Claude and Annie had been life-saving for her and she wanted to give something back to the two people in the world who’d stood by her when nobody else had. If they hadn’t come into her life when they did, she would have been homeless.

He stood tall and firm, his handsome face furrowed into a frown as he digested the information. ‘That is no excuse at all. Why do you have to stay?’

‘Have you no idea of real life, Kazim?’ Now she was angry. ‘Annie is a single mother. One who works hard to provide for her son, and yes, she works as a dancer in the club. Do you know why? Because Claude needs to go to America as soon as possible for operations that will cost more than Annie can ever dream of earning in a regular job.’

‘So why are you involved?’ he snapped angrily. ‘What about her family? The child’s father?’

Amber remembered the day Annie had told her that she and Claude were alone in the world. All of Amber’s own pain and misery at Kazim and her parents’ rejection paled into nothing. Helping Annie had become her focus in life.

‘They disowned her.’ She stood fiercely, looking into his eyes. ‘And I know exactly what that feels like.’

‘Your family disowned you?’ Shock resonated in his deep voice and he came closer to her—too close.

‘After you sent me away, yes, I was disgraced in my family’s eyes, forced to leave Quarazmir to avoid the scandal. I was disowned. Just as Annie was.’ It was that one connection that had created a very strong bond between the two of them. ‘Because of that, I intend to do all I can to help her.’

Amber watched as Kazim took a deep breath in through his nose and could see the anger bubbling inside him. His lips pressed together in a firm line as he exhaled and she felt a dart of satisfaction rush through her. Finally, he was realising the implications of what he’d done.

A key turning in the front door drew their attention and he looked at her in question. Seconds later, Annie breezed in, her usual buoyant self. ‘Oh, what a night,’ she whispered then stopped as she saw Kazim, her eyes wide with shock.

‘Annie, this is Kazim. I was just telling him about Claude.’ Amber saw the usual sadness wash over her friend’s face and hated that she’d had to mention it.

‘I’ll just go and check on him and leave you to it. If you want me to, that is.’ Annie looked from Kazim to Amber, a worried expression on her face.

Amber’s heart warmed at the genuine concern her friend was showing. It seemed that Kazim didn’t completely intimidate her and that, if need be, she’d stand by her friend.

‘I’m fine, thanks, Annie,’ she whispered and gave her a reassuring smile, all the while feeling Kazim’s eyes on her.

‘If you need anything, though,’ Annie said softly before she slipped into Claude’s room and they were alone again.

Amber felt drained, too tired to deal with Kazim, too tired to talk any more about something she had no intention of doing. ‘You need to go now.’

‘Not until I have your word that you will come back to Barazbin with me.’

She shook her head slowly, drawing on new reserves of determination. ‘No, Kazim, I can’t; this is where I belong.’

Amber opened the front door of the flat and stood back, her chin held high, waiting for Kazim to leave. She had nothing more to say. Their marriage was over.

He walked towards her and stopped. In hushed tones, he threw everything into turmoil. ‘The child will have the operations he needs; I will see to that.’

Kazim’s words rushed at her and she could hardly take them in. Claude was going to get the help he needed—from Kazim?

Amber’s breath shuddered in and she clutched the door for support. ‘You mean you will help us?’ Hope soared inside her. Claude was going to be able to walk.

‘On one condition.’

She frowned, her eyes searching his handsome face. ‘Condition?’

‘That you return to Barazbin with me.’

She shook her head, small frantic movements of disbelief. ‘No.’ How could he ask that of her?

Kazim stepped so close that he towered over her, dominating the very air she breathed. ‘He will have all the operations he needs as quickly as possible and I will set him and his mother up in a home, wherever she wants to be. They will be secure and safe whilst the child grows up.’

‘But...’ She couldn’t even put a sentence together. To be given everything she wanted and to have all she’d fled from forced on her at the same time was too much.

Finally she could breathe and think. Would he be so ruthless? ‘What if I say no?’

‘Then I will walk away from here. We will have nothing more to do with each other—apart from a divorce.’ There wasn’t a second’s pause before he answered. He was as mercenary as ever.

‘That’s blackmail.’ Her fingertips touched her lips as she looked at him, totally unable to believe he could be so callous, so unfeeling.

‘No, Amber. It’s just a way of getting what we both want.’

‘You’re unbelievable.’ She fought hard against the urge to pummel her fists on his chest as frustration erupted like a volcano inside her. How could he put her in such a position? Claude would be well and Annie would have a home, but it wasn’t just Kazim who would give them that. It was her too.

‘The decision is yours, Amber. I will return at first light and I expect you to be ready to leave.’