Читать книгу So You Call Yourself A Man - Carl Weber - Страница 17

Cathy and I were on our way home from Brent’s wedding when we got stuck in a terrible traffic jam on the Cross Island Parkway. Her head was on my shoulder and I was holding her hand as I drove. I think she fell asleep about ten minutes into the drive, although she made overtures before we left the reception that she wanted to make love when we got home. I didn’t have a problem with that at all. Matter of fact, it made me contemplate the question Sonny had posed to me before he left to sleep with Tiffany.

What would you tell the woman with the best coochie you ever had in your life if she offered you some?

As a man who wants to be honest with himself, I had to admit that I’d probably take her up on the offer. Thank God, unlike Sonny, the best coochie I’ve ever had belonged to my wife. Yeah, I cheated on her with Michelle a few years back, but I wasn’t proud of it, especially with all this craziness with her claiming I was her baby’s daddy. However, it wasn’t because of the sex that I strayed from my marriage. It was because we lost our connection as friends and we stopped talking to each other. Don’t get me wrong. There was a sexual connection between me and Michelle, but it would have never happened if Cathy and I hadn’t stopped being friends.

When we finally pulled into the driveway, it started to rain hard. Despite the dreary weather, Cathy woke up smiling seductively, and it was obvious what was on her mind. She guided my hand to her crotch, pulling up her dress, and I could feel the heat through the thin material of her lace thong.

“I’m so wet,” she whispered.

I began to rub between her legs gently, and a soft moan escaped from her mouth as she rested her head back on her head-rest.

“I want some, James. I want some bad.” She moaned again just as my fingers found the little button she called her “spot.” She closed her eyes and enjoyed my smooth, easy touch for a few seconds. “You know you owe me from last night.”

We hadn’t had sex last night as we had planned. When I got home from babysitting Marcus, Cathy had been in a deep sleep, and to be truthful, I was glad. I was too mentally drained to do anything, especially after Marcus almost choked to death on that lollipop. All I wanted to do was go to sleep and forget.

“So, you gonna give me some or what?” She reached over to grab my manhood and I stopped her with my free hand.

“I don’t know, Cathy. I’m a little tired,” I teased.

“Tired?” If looks could kill I’d be dead. “Well, you better go inside and drink a cup of coffee or something, ’cause I need some. I ain’t had none in over a week. And you know how I am when I ain’t had none in a while.” She forced her hand free from my grasp and it landed in my lap. She had a smile a mile wide when she felt the rock-hard pipe under my tuxedo pants. “Now that’s what I’m talkin’ ’bout.”

The rain let up for a few seconds and Cathy immediately released my manhood and reached for the door.

“Come on now, James,” she whined, suggesting I wasn’t moving fast enough. “I told you I want some.”

“Aw’ight, boo, I’m coming.” I reached for my door and she smiled, rushing out of the car. “I’ll meet you upstairs. I wanna take a shower and put on something sexy.” She sounded giddy as she ran to the front door ahead of me.

When I got in the house, the sound of running water floated down the stairs. I slid out of my tuxedo jacket and was about to slip off my cummerbund when the phone rang. “I got it,” I yelled up the stairs, reaching for the phone. As usual, I checked the caller ID. The number was unavailable.

“Hello.”

“James?” I almost pissed on myself when I heard Michelle’s voice. Instinctively, I covered the phone, tilting my head and listening to make sure the shower was still running.

“What the hell are you calling my house for?” I hissed into the phone. Threats were one thing, calling my cell phone was another, but I couldn’t believe she had actually dialed my home number again. This chick was getting on my nerves. “I told you about this shit.”

“Don’t be screaming on me, James. I tried to call you on your cell phone, but you didn’t answer.” She was right. I’d cut my ringer off for the wedding ceremony and had completely forgotten to turn it back on.

“This better be important, Michelle, and don’t even think about asking me to babysit. You already told me you don’t have to work tonight.”

“I don’t want you to babysit, James,” she said coldly. “I need you to go to the twenty-four-hour Walgreens on Guy Brewer and get me some Children’s Tylenol. Marcus has a fever.”

“You gotta be kidding. You go get it!” I knew I sounded belligerent and unfeeling, but this girl was going too far.

“You know I ain’t got no car and it’s raining outside. I’m not taking my baby out in the rain. He’s sick already.”

“I’m busy, Michelle. Don’t you have some dude who can help you? Damn, you know you need a man.”

“Very funny, James. And no, I ain’t got nobody to help me. You my help! So stop trying to avoid your responsibility.”

Suddenly, the upstairs bathroom door opened. I looked up and Cathy was at the top of the stairs with only a towel wrapped around her. I don’t think she had a clue who was on the phone or what we were talking about, but I panicked. I dropped the phone on the floor, and by the time I got my shit together, Cathy was headed down the stairs. I scrambled to pick it up.

“Sweetheart, you don’t care if I don’t wear a nighty, do you? It’s only going to come off once we get started.”

“Whatever you want to do, hun,” I told her quickly. “Just get your fine ass up the stairs so we can do it.” Thank God she stopped halfway down the steps. I placed the phone on my ear and it was dead.

“Okay.” She stared at me suspiciously. “Who’s that on the phone?”

“Aah…” I glanced at the phone, wishing it wasn’t in my hand. “It was Sonny, but we…we got disconnected.”

“What did he want?”

“Ah…his rental car broke down on the Conduit….” I couldn’t even finish my lie because the phone rang again.

Cathy gave me a disappointed look that was about to become an angry look. “You’re not going to pick him up, are you, James?”

“Not until I put you to bed properly, baby. Sonny’s just gonna have to wait. I promise.”

“Good, now hurry up and get your friend off the phone. Momma wants some lovin’.” She turned around and walked back up the stairs while I quickly walked toward the kitchen.

“Hello?”

“Why’d you hang up on me?” Michelle snapped.

“I didn’t.” I was trying to remain calm.

She raised her voice even louder. “Yes, you did.”

“Look, I don’t have time to argue with you. It was an accident. I dropped the phone by accident.”

“Whatever.” I could almost see her neck rolling on the other end of the phone. “So, are you gonna bring me some Tylenol for your son?” I hated it when she called him my son.

“Yeah, I’ll be over there in a few.” I tried to think of a lie to give me more time. “I’m waiting for my wife to come home with the car.” I hung up the phone, then hit the talk button again. When I heard the dial tone, I placed the phone on the kitchen table. Now if she called back, she’d just get a busy signal, I told myself as I walked toward the stairs to take care of my wife.