Читать книгу Daddy’s Little Princess and Will You Love Me 2-in-1 Collection - Cathy Glass, Cathy Glass - Страница 17

As Beth was looking forward to seeing her father on Friday, I was willing the day to come. I hoped that then her conversation – at present dominated by seeing her father – would be replaced by more general talk. Of course I was pleased that Beth was able to see her father, but her continuous chatter about her wonderful daddy wasn’t helping Adrian and Paula. They were disappointed enough already that they wouldn’t be seeing their father at the weekend. This seemed to be rubbing it in.

‘I don’t know what to wear when I see my daddy tomorrow,’ Beth declared over dinner on Thursday evening.

‘It might be a good idea to choose something this evening,’ I suggested. ‘Jessie will be collecting you at four o’clock tomorrow, so you won’t have much time then.’

‘Good idea,’ Beth said. ‘I’ll choose my dress after dinner. Then I can tell my daddy what I’m going to wear when I talk to him tonight. I am phoning him tonight, aren’t I?’

‘Yes, love. You are,’ I said.

‘So I’ll tell him what I’m going to wear then.’

‘Will he want to know?’ Adrian asked, glancing up. ‘I don’t think my dad is especially interested in what we wear.’

Good point, I thought. Meeting Adrian’s gaze, I threw him a reassuring smile. Of course John liked the children to look smart, just as I did, especially if we were going out, but he wasn’t interested in the detail. I doubted many men were.

‘My daddy always wants to know what I’m wearing,’ Beth persisted. ‘Sometimes he chooses what I wear and sometimes we choose it together.’

Adrian returned to his dinner, which was far more interesting than Beth’s talk of clothes, as she continued: ‘Perhaps I’ll wear my yellow dress. Or I could wear the blue one again. I’ve got a blue necklace and bracelet that go with the blue dress. I think I remembered to pack them.’ And so it went on.

I smiled politely.

As soon as Beth had finished eating, she asked if she could leave the table to go to her room and choose her dress for the following day. I readily agreed. She slipped from her chair and skipped out of the room and upstairs.

‘Can I go to my room and choose a dress?’ Adrian said with a smile.

‘You don’t wear dresses, silly,’ Paula said, not appreciating that he was joking.

‘We have to be patient,’ I said. ‘Beth’s very excited about seeing her father, which is only natural.’

‘Can I have a blue dress like Beth’s?’ Paula asked.

‘And me!’ Adrian added. ‘And a necklace and bracelet to match, please.’

I cleared away the dinner things and then went upstairs to see how Beth was getting on. Paula came with me. Beth’s bedroom door was wide open and we went in. Her wardrobe was open and every drawer too, with most of the contents strewn across the bed, chair and floor. It looked like an upmarket bring-and-buy sale. Beth was standing in the middle of the room, surrounded by all the clothes and looking very fraught.

‘I really can’t decide what to wear!’ she declared, close to tears.

I thought this had gone far enough. ‘I think I’ll decide which dress you wear,’ I said. ‘Then it won’t cause you a problem.’

I thought she might object but instead she looked at me relieved. ‘Yes, please, you choose,’ she said.

‘You’ve got lots of clothes,’ Paula said as I began picking through them.

‘Yes, and they’ve all got to be put away,’ I pointed out.

I quickly singled out a dress; it was one of the few that were suitable for winter. Made from a warm pink-and-grey check material, it had long sleeves. ‘This is perfect,’ I said enthusiastically, holding it up.

Beth stood for a moment, hands on hips, considering the dress and then finally smiled. ‘Yes,’ she said.

I hoped Paula didn’t pick up any grand ideas about what she should wear. I put the dress to one side and then began gathering together the other clothes. Beth helped, so too did Paula by collecting up the packets of children’s lacy tights that were scattered across the floor. We finished just before seven o’clock and then the three of us went into my bedroom, where Beth propped herself on the bed ready to telephone her father. Once Derek was on the line I passed the telephone to Beth and, following our new routine, took Paula into the bathroom for her bath. I could hear Beth talking as I bathed Paula; she was telling her father of the problems she’d had trying to choose a dress, until I’d come to the rescue. She then described the dress I’d chosen and the matching necklace and bracelet she was thinking of wearing with it. I was only half listening as I was finding Beth’s chatter about clothes tedious. Girls of her age should be thinking about more interesting things. Eventually I called out: ‘Tell your daddy what you did at school today. And about your class assembly. I’m sure he’ll be interested.’ I thought that even Derek must be tiring of all the dress talk by now.

Beth did as I suggested, although I was too far away to hear Derek’s reply. Then Beth asked him what he’d had for his dinner and if he had eaten it all.

Once Paula was ready for bed I took her into her room where she chose some books for me to read. I’d read one story when Beth joined us.

‘Have you finished talking to your daddy?’ Paula asked, making room for Beth beside her on the bed.

‘Yes, and I’m seeing him tomorrow. I’m so happy.’

‘This book is called Grandma’s Shopping,’ I said, opening the next picture book.

‘I haven’t got a grandma,’ Beth said.

‘I have,’ Paula said. ‘And a grandpa. They’re very nice and they love us lots.’

I smiled. ‘You’ll meet them soon,’ I said to Beth. And I began the story.

The following morning Beth was unusually quiet and hardly said a word at breakfast. I’d been expecting her to be very talkative about seeing her father that afternoon, so I was immediately concerned that something was troubling her. I also noticed she wasn’t eating as well as she usually did.

‘Are you all right, love?’ I asked as she toyed with her cereal.

She set her spoon in her bowl and looked at me seriously. ‘No. I’m very worried,’ she said, frowning.

Adrian, Paula and I all looked at her, concerned.

‘What are you worried about, love?’ I asked, setting down my mug of coffee so that I could give her my full attention. ‘Can you tell me? I might be able to help.’

Beth looked at me, clearly deep in thought, and frowned again. I wondered what on earth it could be that was troubling her. She usually voiced her concerns reasonably easily.

‘I’ve been thinking,’ she said with a heartfelt sigh. ‘I don’t want to wear the dress you chose. I want to wear my red one.’

‘Is that what you’re worrying about?’ Adrian asked incredulously, taking the words right out of my mouth.

Beth nodded.

‘Beth, love,’ I said gently. ‘Your daddy will love you whatever you wear. It’s you he wants to see, not your dress.’

‘But I want to look nice for him,’ Beth persisted.

‘And you will. Now finish your breakfast. We don’t want to be late for school.’

‘I don’t want any more,’ Beth said, pushing the bowl of half-eaten cereal away. ‘I’m not hungry.’

‘All right, leave what you don’t want.’

Beth got down from the table and went upstairs to brush her teeth. I quickly drained the last of my coffee and went upstairs after her. I wanted to talk to her alone.

‘Beth, love,’ I said, going into the bathroom, ‘are you sure there’s nothing worrying you – apart from which dress to wear?’ For it seemed incredible to me that choosing what to wear could cause a child this much consternation. I wondered if it was masking a more deep-seated problem that Beth was finding difficult to share. ‘Your daddy is being well looked after in hospital,’ I reassured her, wondering if this was the problem.

‘I know he is,’ Beth said. ‘And I’m seeing him later, but I don’t know what to wear.’

‘You’d tell me if there was anything else worrying you, wouldn’t you?’ I asked. ‘I’d do my best to help.’

‘Yes,’ Beth said. ‘Thank you, but I’m fine.’

There was nothing more I could say.

The day passed quickly with a big shop at the supermarket, unpacking it all on our return, then general housework and playing with Paula. When I took Beth’s clean laundry to her room I noticed she’d returned the grey-and-pink check dress to her wardrobe, but hadn’t chosen anything in its place. There wouldn’t be much time when we returned from school before Jessie collected Beth. I thought about choosing another dress for her and insisting she wore it, but I didn’t want to upset her, and I wondered why Derek had let the situation get so out of hand. It must take them ages to get ready to leave the house when there was no school uniform to rely on. But then, from what I’d heard of their telephone conversations, Derek shared Beth’s love of clothes and accessories. Oh well, I thought, it wouldn’t do if we were all the same.

Beth was in very good spirits when she came out of school that afternoon and skipped over to me happily. ‘I’m seeing my daddy soon!’ she cried. ‘I’m so happy. And I know what I’m going to wear.’

‘Good,’ Adrian said as we made our way to the car. ‘Dare I ask what it is?’

‘I’m not telling you,’ Beth teased. ‘You’ll have to wait and see. It’ll be a big surprise.’

‘I can’t wait,’ Adrian said dryly. I wondered how much attention she’d paid to her lessons that day and how much time she’d spent thinking about what she was going to wear. Whatever would she be like as a teenager? I thought with a smile.

Once home, Beth quickly took off her coat and shoes, then went straight up to her room to change. ‘Remember, Jessie will be here in fifteen minutes,’ I called after her. ‘Do you want some help?’

‘No. I’ll be ready on time,’ she replied.

I went into the kitchen to begin the preparation for dinner. I assumed Beth would eat when she returned from seeing her father. As I worked, I kept one eye on the clock. At five minutes to four, with no sign of Beth, and Jessie due in five minutes, I left what I was doing and went upstairs. Beth’s bedroom door was closed, so I knocked. ‘It’s Cathy. Are you ready, Beth? Jessie will be here soon.’

‘I’m ready,’ Beth called from inside. ‘You can come in.’

‘Good girl,’ I said.

I opened her bedroom door, took a step in and stopped. Good grief! I thought but didn’t say. ‘Oh. Is that what you’re wearing?’ I asked, trying to hide my shock.

Beth grinned, pleased. ‘Yes. Do you like it?’

I could see how pleased she was with herself. Not only did I not like the dress she was wearing, but also it wasn’t suitable for a child, the cold weather or hospital visiting. It was very short, made from bright-red glossy satin and had puffed sleeves and a big lace collar. I remembered seeing the dress when I’d unpacked Beth’s case, but I’d assumed it was for ‘dressing up’ in at home. Beth was also wearing black lacy tights and children’s high-heeled shoes, which again I’d assumed were for dressing up. However, what concerned me even more was what Beth had put on her face.

‘Are you wearing make-up?’ I asked, aghast.

Beth nodded and turned to admire her handiwork in the mirror. ‘I did a good job, didn’t I?’

I stared at her reflection in the mirror: bright-blue eye shadow, navy mascara and red lipstick. Normally I didn’t let young girls wear make-up unless it was part of playing at home, nor did I let them dress provocatively, which was the only word to describe Beth’s appearance. It sexualizes the innocent. She looked like a child prostitute and I shuddered at the thought. But what could I say? Beth was so happy. I didn’t want to hurt her feelings and ruin her evening, and Jessie was expected any minute.

‘Usually my daddy helps me put on my make-up,’ Beth said, again admiring her face in the mirror. ‘But I did it all by myself this time.’

‘Your father puts make-up on you?’ I asked, shocked.

‘Yes. He says he has a steady hand and can do it better than me.’

I shifted my gaze from Beth to the photographs on the shelves. ‘Were you wearing make-up in those photographs?’ I asked.

‘Yes, daddy did it for me.’

Which explained why Beth looked that much older in the photographs.

‘Where did you get the make-up from?’ I now asked, for I was sure I would have remembered seeing it when I’d unpacked.

‘It was in my drawer at school,’ Beth said, finally turning from the mirror. ‘I took it in to show my friends – they’re not allowed make-up. Then I forgot it. I remembered today and I put it in my coat pocket so I wouldn’t forget it.’

The doorbell rang. ‘That’ll be Jessie,’ I said. There wasn’t time for Beth to change.

‘Mum! Doorbell!’ Adrian yelled from the living room.

‘Yes, I heard!’ I returned.

We went downstairs, with Beth clutching the banister rail and tottering on her high heels. I opened the front door. ‘I’m sorry,’ I said to Jessie. ‘Beth got herself ready.’

Beth appeared beside me.

‘Oh gosh! You are dressed up,’ Jessie exclaimed, seeming more impressed than shocked.

‘I wanted her to wear a warmer dress,’ I explained. ‘And I’m afraid I didn’t know about the make-up.’

‘Daddy bought it for me,’ Beth said proudly.

Jessie nodded, apparently not sharing my concerns. ‘Get your coat on then,’ Jessie said. ‘Daddy will be waiting.’

I took Beth’s coat from the hall stand and helped her into it. ‘Be careful on those heels,’ I said as she tottered unsteadily over the doorstep. ‘Have a nice time.’

‘I should have her back soon after six,’ Jessie called. ‘It’s a twenty-minute drive each way and an hour visiting.’

‘Thank you,’ I said.

‘Can’t we stay longer?’ Beth said as they went down the path.

‘We’ll see,’ I heard Jessie say. Then they disappeared onto the pavement and to Jessie’s car.

I closed the front door. Adrian and Paula appeared in the hall from the living room. ‘Has Beth gone?’ Paula asked. ‘I didn’t say goodbye.’

‘They were in a rush,’ I said. ‘You’ll see her later. She’ll be back before your bedtime. And Adrian,’ I said, ‘when Beth comes home please don’t say anything about what she is wearing.’

‘Why not?’ he asked.

‘Let’s just say it’s not what I would have chosen, but I don’t want her upset.’

‘Sure, Mum, I promise I won’t say a word.’

‘Good boy.’