Читать книгу Encounter Your Destiny - David Inc. O'Dell - Страница 5

I didn’t know this would be a love story. After all, I’m no one special. I’m not complex. I’m not Prince Charming. I’m just an average middle-class guy with brown hair, boy-next-door looks and height, who lives in a traditional 3-bedroom, brick, ranch style home in the suburbs of Houston, Texas. I’m just a guy who goes to work, watches the paint dry on the walls, comes home, takes a hot shower, microwaves a TV dinner, watches a little TV, mows the lawn if it needs it, runs the vacuum over the floor because I like to keep things neat, then goes to bed. I get up the next day, put on my shoes and khakis, and do the same things all over again. My shirts vary, my lunches vary, but pretty much, it’s all the same. I don’t have a glamorous job or salary. I work as a project coordinator and designer for a civil engineering company and most of the time, it’s dull and boring. No excitement there. As I said, I’m your average guy who goes to work every day to earn a buck and pay the bills. My life is uneventful in the most (yawn!) ordinary sense.

When a person repeats the same thing over and over again, several things can happen. One, that person becomes stagnated, gets stuck in a rut, and continues to repeat the same thing over and over again. Two, that person turns to food, drugs and/or alcohol to try to numb the pain of boredom; and third, that person does something to change because he/she can no longer stand the monotony of the sameness every day.

I wanted change. I was contented with my life and routine, and I was at peace, but I wasn’t fulfilled. I knew that I wasn’t living my life with purpose or passion. With verve. With excitement. I was just drifting by like so many other poor souls who have accepted that their dull existence is all there is and have agreed with the universe to just “get by.” And, I admit it. I was lonely. Don’t get me wrong. I didn’t need a woman to complete my life, but I knew it would be nice to have someone to love who loved me in return. It would be a big bonus in my life. After all, watching reruns of “Criminal Minds” on Friday nights is not exactly my idea of living the good life. But, here’s the quandary. How does a single, 49 year old guy meet a woman to date, let alone love? I had long ago outgrown the bar scene and had no desire to try to find a woman that way. And, friends were no help. They didn’t know any available women to set me up with. What’s a guy to do?

In October, 2009, one sleepy, rainy Saturday afternoon, after watching Cary Grant and Katherine Hepburn together in a screwball romantic comedy movie on television, I decided to join the millions of others who had found love online. Sitting on my sofa, I took a sip of my Coke and opened up my laptop and clicked on Match.com. It looked simple enough. To me, online dating was the new 21^st century “bar scene.” I had heard stories of others who met their significant other this way, and I decided to give it a shot. I perused the photos of the thousands of women online who were looking for relationships. It dawned on me how lonely people were. Both men and women. With all the social networking communication tools we have today like iPhones, Facebook, Twitter, iPads, etc., people still have a difficult time meeting one another and connecting.

At least I was doing something. It made me feel hopeful. When I found a lady online that I was interested in, I’d email her and we’d talk on the phone. The next step was meeting them in person for coffee, lunch or dinner. Starbucks was always a good choice because if I didn’t hit it off with her, I could leave after my cup of coffee was empty. Generally, when I met the woman in person, I found her to be much different than the person she projected over the phone. Perhaps it’s because people can create an illusion on the phone, and in person, that illusion is shattered. You’re exposed. All physical and personality imperfections are on display. Most of the women I met were nice, but I wasn’t attracted to any of them. Not one. I like all women and can find beauty in all of them, but the women I met on Match.com simply didn’t interest me. There wasn’t any chemistry between us. And it was discouraging.

Perhaps I was too cautious with the online dating game. I’m not sure. I wasn’t exactly a novice when it came to relationships though. I was married for 19 years and in that marriage, I had a lovely daughter, who is now 21 years old and in college. When my marriage ended, I was devastated. It took me several years to get over it and it took a long time to heal my heart. I was “over” the relationship logically, but my heart wasn’t over it. The heart and mind battled each other constantly.

Mind: “David, you know she has changed and is not the same person. It’s best for you to be divorced. Life goes on and everything always works out for the best. You need to move on with your life. You deserve someone who will love you with all her heart.”

Heart: “But, I loved her and she was my best friend. I loved being married and I loved that my daughter had both of her parents at home. I don’t like to give up on things. And, she was my first love and I miss being married sharing our lives together.”

Mind: “Shape up, David. Get over it. Time to move on!”

I then got married a second time, but it was way too soon after my divorce. I don’t regret that marriage, but honestly, it was terrible. I believe that every experience in life is a valuable experience though – no matter how bad it may seem – and even the “bad” second marriage was a valuable one. I learned so much about myself and became a stronger, more confident, better person.

My two failed marriages helped me grow up and know myself better. When I went to Match.com to find romance and companionship, I went with the right attitude. I didn’t need anyone out of desperation; I simply wanted to share my life with someone. I believe life is more enjoyable if we can share it with someone. It makes the everyday, mundane things special. Adventurous, even. I was an average guy looking for a little more adventure in my life.

I have always done my best to find adventure wherever I could. I have raced cars in my past and currently, I scuba dive, and travel extensively. I’ve been to Russia and China – both amazing places that opened my world to different cultures and lifestyles. I’m not a sophisticated guy, but I am educated and open to new possibilities everywhere. After all, I do believe that anything is possible and that you never know what’s going to happen around the corner.

Little did I know that life was about to get very interesting….