Читать книгу Listen My Son - Dwight Longenecker - Страница 25

In his teaching the Abbot should always observe the method of the Apostle, ‘Employ arguments, appeals and rebukes.’ He must behave differently at different times, sometimes using threats, sometimes encouragement. He must show the tough attitude of a master, and also the loving affection of a father. Thus he should sternly reprimand the undisciplined and unruly, but entreat the obedient, the meek and the patient to go forward in virtue; as for the careless and the scornful, we instruct him to rebuke and correct them. He should not pretend that he does not see the faults of offenders, but remember the danger overhanging Eli, priest of Shiloh and, as best he can, he should cut them out by the roots as soon as they begin to show themselves. He should correct upright and intelligent minds with verbal admonitions once or twice, but the shameless, the thick-skinned and the proud or disobedient, he should repress at the very beginning of their sinful ways with the corporal punishment of blows, bearing in mind what is written, ‘The fool is not corrected by words,’ and again, ‘Strike your son with the rod and you will deliver his soul from death.’

Benedict encourages the kind of equality which treats everyone equally while recognizing that they are not the same. How to do this can be summed up in one sentence from today's reading: He [the abbot] must show the tough attitude of a master, and also the loving affection of a father’. He must behave differently at different times with ‘arguments, appeals and rebukes (2 Tim. 4.2): he needs to use both threats and encouragement.

As usual, Benedict's advice is simple, profound and full of common sense. He will give more detail about monastic discipline in the so-called ‘penal code’ of chapters 21–30, but here Benedict lays down some important foundation principles. First of all the abbot understands that discipline is not primarily to maintain communal order, but to build character. He will therefore focus on the faults of the individual and root them out like noxious weeds. Secondly, he will do this as soon as possible lest they grow up into bad characteristics which dominate the personality and handicap the person's social, mental and spiritual progress. Finally, the type and amount of discipline should be appropriate for each person's unique personality.

To establish these basic principles of discipline in the home requires us to be disciplined ourselves. Firstly, if we understand that discipline is not just to maintain order but to build character, then we will sometimes have to discipline our children even if what they are doing is not particularly disruptive or naughty. It is also difficult to root out the fault at its first appearance since faults often first show themselves in ways that seem rather harmless or ‘cute’. But failure to recognize the fault and do something about it doesn't solve the problem: it only delays it, giving the weed time to grow into a plant which is too deeply rooted to be pulled out at all. Furthermore, when we fail to treat our children's faults in the first instance with measured and mild discipline, we are more likely to be reduced at some later stage to the frustration, violence and anger which we will regret, and which will only serve to compound the child's fault with resentment and rebellion.