Читать книгу Listen My Son - Dwight Longenecker - Страница 26

The Abbot should always bear in mind what he is; he should bear in mind what he is called; and let him realise that more is demanded of him to whom more is entrusted. He must realise also how difficult and arduous is the task he has undertaken, that of ruling souls and serving men of many different characters; one, indeed, to be encouraged, another to be rebuked, another persuaded, each according to his nature and intelligence. Thus he must adapt and fit himself to all, so that not only will he not lose any of the flock entrusted to him, but he will rejoice as his good flock increases.

The abbot and the father must always remember who they are and what they are called. They are called ‘father’ because God has shared with them the power of creation and entrusted them with the care of eternal human souls. This is a high calling, and one which should never be underestimated. One of the problems with modern life is that people have lost a sense of vocation. So many men support their families with anonymous jobs in huge government departments or large corporations. There is constant pressure to produce small results which are subsumed into the larger product. There is little satisfaction; the only reward is financial, and because the job seems meaningless too many men seek meaning by racing after the promise of promotion or higher pay. But this is an empty pursuit.

Instead the vocation of fatherhood is the one area where modern men can reclaim a sense of meaning in life. This means making our job as father the highest priority in life after our dedication to God himself. If we heed Benedict's advice always to remember that we are fathers and to remember the calling God has given, then a sense of vocation and meaning will come flooding back into our lives.

This will also help our marriages. Women often complain of the drudgery of housekeeping and the loneliness of looking after the children all the time. But this complaint is not so much that the women must stay at home and look after the children, but that they feel they are doing so with no help, no encouragement and little interest from their husband. So, quite fairly, women look for an escape from the monotony and loneliness of being ‘just a housewife’.

But if their husband's priorities shifted and they both placed their marriage and their parenting as the highest priority, many of the problems would be solved. You could sum it up by saying that a woman's place is in the home, only if the man's place is there too.

And if the abba's first priority is his home and family, then Benedict also tells us more about how to handle the children in his care. The abba must become ‘all things to all men’ (1 Cor. 9.22), adapting himself and his style of training to each of his different children. This job is not easy. It requires confidence, and enough strength of character to be constantly growing and learning. Entering fully into the demands of fatherhood is precisely how that growth and learning can take place.