Читать книгу Single Wife Trapped Husband - Freda Milton - Страница 4

We woo our potential partners as we date one another. Going to the movies, skating, bowling or hiking becomes the norm. Some couples look forward to going on nature walks through the park and vacationing. As a result of the intimacy dating creates -we fall in love and commit to marriage/long-term relationships.

The puzzling question is; what happens to all the actions of love and dating after a few years of commitment? There are little to no dates, the butterflies fly away and the walks through the park become a distant memory. There are a variety of reasons why couples break up/divorce. Single Wife, Trapped Husband provides a snapshot of the common issues that destroy fifty percent of marriages/long-term relationships. No two people are exactly alike, which means no two couples are exactly alike. However, there are basic expectations and skills each of us possess that either help us maintain meaningful relationships or destroy them.

Researchers have identified the most common reasons couples divorce. A recent national survey noted the most common reasons given for divorce were, “lack of commitment (73%), too much arguing (56%), infidelity (55%), marrying too young (46%), unrealistic expectations (45%), lack of equality in the relationship (44%), lack of preparation for marriage (41%), and abuse (29%). Respondents often provided more than one reason, so the percentages add up to more than 100%. (www.divorce.usu.edu/files/uploads/Lesson3.pdf)

During my professional and personal experience, I find many women often feel single because their partners do not meet many of their needs and men feel trapped during decision making times. Many men assert that their partners send mixed messages, which makes it difficult to please their partners. Coincidently, both arguments are valid. Sharing our lives with another person can be one of the most challenging, yet rewarding experiences life offers.

It is my hope that each couple reading this book is inspired to honor their commitment. I believe we can prevent, manage and ultimately overcome many of our problems once we truly understand ourselves and our partners. I speak to you and with you, utilizing anonymous scenarios from clients, family and friends. Each scenario is specific and may not pertain to your experience but the categories of scenarios are relevant in all of our lives. Therefore, it is wise to take the opportunity to dialogue about each scenario as it relates to your relationship. Ask one another can you relate to one of the partners feelings? Are there other solutions that address the issues? How would you all handle the problem? Asking one another such questions creates awareness of one another’s interest and needs, as well as increases the line of communication.

Please note the names are fictitious and the information is presented using general information. The goal of the coaching commentaries at the end of each scenario is to gain insight regarding the importance of understanding our partner’s thought process and emotional needs.

Do you desire to be a part of one of the greatest experiences of all time? Marriage, a union that involves sharing, loving, respecting, forgiving, servicing and sacrificing for the one person we CHOOSE to love unconditionally. Do not give up! You are on your way to a beautiful, loving and supportive relationship.