Читать книгу Theory of emotional relativity. Practical guide to the development of awareness and emotional intelligence - Inna Zakharova - Страница 24

If a person often experiences fear, anxiety, doubts, the first thing to do is use to our strategy, which we have described.

We are scared when we believe that we lack resources, when we feel small, poor, unable to cope with the situation, with life. The more often we prove to ourselves that we are able to manage the situation and achieve goals, the more intensively we turn from a small and poor little man, first into a normal one, and then into a champion for ourselves, because we have objective results.

If we do not set goals, and everything happens by itself in our life, we cannot estimate the result of our activity and life in general.

We cannot independently estimate ourselves, we need feedback from the outside world. And now the outside world evaluates us and reports: “Look, you’re good at this field, and you have done it perfectly, this is great,” but you cannot understand whether this is your result or not, because you didn’t set such goals.

Setting a goal, taking some steps towards it and achieving a result will lead to a large number of accumulated results and, of course, to self-confidence. You will have confirmation that you can, that you have resources, skills, abilities. But in this whole story, you need results.

People who focus only on the process do everything in their life with pleasure, but they have no self-respect, because there is no result of this activity. The feeling of respect “I can” creates security from the inside.