Читать книгу Gabi, a Girl in Pieces - Isabel Quintero - Страница 37

October 26

I don’t know how I feel about having a boyfriend now that I have one. I mean, I know how I feel about the kissing and holding hands: I totally love it! But the whole following me around and having to spend every freaking lunch together has me a bit smothered. And to top it off, he told me he loved me! Loved. Me. I didn’t know what to say so I acted like there was a bee in my shirt. I didn’t want to say “I love you” back because I don’t love him, and it would be a lie, and I hate lying. So I wrote a letter to him (that I probably won’t send) expressing how I feel about our current situation.

Dear Eric,

I enjoyed the moments we spent together out in the hallway. And by the gym. And in your car. And by the photography classroom. Your breath smelled divine. I like how you remembered to chew some gum before getting really close to me. I obviously forgot as you could smell by the aroma of Hot Cheetos emanating from my soft luscious lips that one time last week. Anyway, I want to tell you how much I like you. I don’t think I would, or should, use the word love because that is reserved for special occasions. Not to say that you are not special, just not that special—yet. When I see you, I want to run to you and hug you and throw you up against a wall and feel the wetness of your lips. I want to stroke your hair and hold your hand and walk with you at lunch time and have people say, “Is he really going out with her?” Maybe that fat girl ain’t so bad after all, they think. I don’t want to hurt your feelings, but I don’t want to lie to you either. I believe in honesty. Don’t you?

Yours fondly,

Gabi H.

I don’t think I could bring myself to send it. I don’t know how he would take it. I’m going to talk to Cindy about this tomorrow and see what she thinks I should do. Or maybe not. She’s been feeling pretty emotional lately, and I’m not in the mood for the Wrath of the Pregnant Girl. I didn’t realize having a boyfriend would be so much trouble. I don’t want to think about this today. I will think about it in the morning. I guess I might as well finish up my grandpa poem since the first draft is due tomorrow.