Читать книгу Our Collective Life - JD Kennedy - Страница 33

David was stunned. He quickly re-read over the letter, and then carefully folded it before looking up. He immediately recognised that Dianne was gone and Sam was in her place.

Disregarding all pleasantries, he indicated the letter, and said, “You know about this letter, Sam?”

“Yeh, I know.”

“And what do you make of it?”

“What do you reckon? It’s pretty fucked up.”

“It’s unfortunate, that’s for sure.” David said. “For starters, there haven’t been new members of the Collective created for quite a long time. At least that I am aware of.”

“For fucks sake, we don’t know if this new one is going to part of the Collective. Jo is not one of us, so we don’t know if this new one will be or not.”

“Ok, ok” David held up his hands in an apologetic gesture. Whilst it was something they often argued about now was not the time as he could sense Sam was especially agitated.

“What’s the feeling within the Collective?”

“We all agree it’s pretty fucked up. I mean shit, she tried to knock herself off, and then does this and splits off? What the fuck is wrong with her? Why is she so fucked up?”

If you really wanted the answer, I would tell you, David thought a little sadly. Instead he simply said “So, I’m guessing you are angry about it.”

“No shit, Sherlock.” Sam spat out.

** ** **

After the session, David pondered all that had happened. Whilst he was glad they were starting to trust him more and finally feeling like they could be honest with him, he did wish more members were not being created. They worked hard to get the Collective more cohesive, and that meant less members. They were at a manageable number now, with 8 adults, including Jo. Does this 9^thadult mean the Collective is going to be increasing once more? Too many members all fighting for time out here made things much more chaotic and stressful. Practically speaking, it also made it harder to keep track of time. Every time a member came out, there had been a gap in time for them, which was commonly called ‘lost time’. The members struggled with it to different degrees, but the more members wanting time out here, the worse the lost time was experienced. David didn’t want the Collective to go back to that.

What’s more, he worried about Jo. It was really Jo’s fragile state that resulted with the Collective being admitted to a psychiatric clinic numerous times in her 20s. He had difficulty working with her as she just could not manage to stay out front for very long. If she became distressed, then she would be replaced by another member of the Collective. He couldn’t fault them for that – simply put, that was their whole function. They came out to take the punishment/abuse or whatever else was going on. But as a result, David’s contact with Jo herself had been limited, and now he wasn’t sure how to tackle this new development at all.