Читать книгу A Precious Gift - Karen Smith Rose - Страница 11

On Saturday night when Brian entered the kitchen looking for Carrie, he felt a nerve in his jaw work. He immediately caught sight of her speaking to the caterer. She wore a beaded, royal-blue dress with long sleeves and a demure neckline, and he reluctantly admitted his wife had never looked more beautiful. With her hair caught at the nape of her neck in a sleek chignon, a few wavy tendrils framed her face. She’d clasped around her neck a sapphire necklace he’d given her for Christmas, and she looked…like a princess. All she needed was the tiara.

All he needed was a cold shower!

Setting aside the impulse to pull the pins from her hair and mess up her lipstick, he replaced desire with restraint. He didn’t want to need her right now. He was still angry she’d changed the whole dynamic of their lives by inviting Lisa to live with them. They hadn’t made love since before Lisa had arrived. For the past few nights, there had seemed to be an impenetrable fence down the center of their bed.

When Carrie saw him, she finished her consultation with the caterer and crossed to him.

“You’re beautiful tonight.” He couldn’t help complimenting her in spite of the tension between them.

She looked surprised for a moment. “You’re looking quite handsome yourself.”

Just standing here with Carrie now, looking at her, breathing in the classic scent of her perfume, he realized his body was completely aroused. He put the brakes on his libido. “Is everything ready?”

“Just about.”

“Where’s Lisa?”

Carrie looked worried. “She spent most of the day in her room. I made her soup and a salad for lunch.”

After a glance at the caterer, Brian took Carrie by the elbow and shepherded her into the short hallway that led to the garage. “You’re headed for disappointment if you expect anything from that girl. She’s a rebellious teenager. Her story tells you that. She’s not a stray puppy you can bring into the house, feed and pamper and who will love you unconditionally. You’re going to get hurt if you want more from her than a thank-you when she leaves. I don’t even know if she’ll give you that.” As far as he was concerned, Carrie’s soft heart had to be protected, and she needed to see the reality of the situation.

But her response told him she didn’t. “Maybe I’m more hopeful than you are. Maybe I’m hoping to form a bond with her so she can trust me. She’s been hurt, Brian, by her parents’ death, by her boyfriend walking away, by her aunt’s attitude, which seemed to tell her she was a bother.”

“You can’t perform miracles in a month.” Carrie had never before been quite so determined, quite so adamant that she could make a difference.

When Carrie took a step closer to him, there was so much longing in her dark-brown eyes, he couldn’t look away. She touched his set jaw with a caressing stroke that made fireworks shoot through his veins.

“Maybe I can’t perform miracles,” she murmured, “but I need to try.”

Her soft words crumbled his restraint. He couldn’t help but reach out and smooth his hand along the side of Carrie’s face. Her eyes became a deeper brown, and her lips parted ever so slightly. She always responded to his touch and he to hers. Drawing her to him, his lips seared hers. He held on to the passion, kept the kiss short but couldn’t resist stroking her tongue with his. Then he reluctantly released her and stepped away, hungry for her. That hunger never diminished. Yet he kept it in check, and he wasn’t sure why.

The doorbell rang and they could hear it even in the corridor outside of the laundry room.

Breaking eye contact, Carrie glanced under her sleeve at a department-store watch that fit her wrist like a bracelet. It had been a gift from her sisters last Christmas. He could buy her a diamond watch and had offered to, but she preferred wearing this one. He’d realized long ago sentiment meant more to Carrie than quality or monetary value. He was afraid sentiment where Lisa was concerned would hurt them both.

“We have to greet our guests.” She put her fingers to her lips. “I’ll stop in the powder room first.”

When she conjured up a smile, he fought the urge to kiss her all over again.

The doorbell rang once more, and Brian went to the foyer. There were two couples there—the O’Briens and the Hammonds—as well as Derrick Dennehy, who’d obviously come without his wife. That was peculiar since he’d spoken to Derrick the day before yesterday and the lawyer had assured Brian they’d both be there. Maybe Jackie had picked up the flu bug that was going around.

As Carrie joined them and guided the O’Briens and the Hammonds into the living room where hors d’oeuvres were waiting, Derrick held back and grabbed Brian’s arm. After the maid had gone to the kitchen, he said, “Jackie couldn’t make it tonight.”

Something in Derrick’s voice warned Brian it wasn’t a simple flu bug that had kept his wife away.

Adjusting his striped silk tie, Derrick looked uncomfortable. “She moved out yesterday and it looks as if we’ll be getting a divorce. I had no idea this was coming. It came out of the blue.”

The same age as Brian—in their midthirties—Derrick and Jackie had been married after their college graduation.

“Out of the blue?”

Derrick shook his head in exasperation. “You’d think I’d know a woman after living with her for twelve years. But then she said that was the problem. She maintains I haven’t really been living with her all these years. I’ve been spending too many nights in my office, too many weekends out of town drumming up more business so she could drive that fancy new Italian sports car. Now she tells me she’s met someone who makes her the center of his world. I don’t know how he can do that and work, too!”

Abruptly Derrick shook his head. “I didn’t mean to go into all that. You’re the first person I’ve told.”

“I’m sorry, Derrick. Is there anything I can do?”

“Yes. Put together this deal in Alaska. It will give me something else to think about. The contracts to develop it would keep me busy for the next few months.”

As an attorney, Derrick took care of much of the legal work that came up with the projects Brian coordinated. “I’ll see what I can do.”

Carrie raised questioning eyes to Brian as he and Derrick entered the living room. Brian gave a slight shake of his head, and when neither he nor Derrick explained why Jackie wasn’t present, Carrie understood she should stay away from that topic.

It wasn’t until Ted Hammond, Rob O’Brien and Derrick were engaged in business conversation and Ted and Rob’s wives had escaped to freshen up in the powder room, that Brian took Carrie aside out of earshot of everyone to explain, “Jackie left Derrick.”

Carrie was shocked. “You’re not serious.”

“He never saw it coming. She found someone else.” To Brian, that was what it boiled down to.

Because Carrie looked pensive, Brian asked, “Did you know? Did she say anything to you?” The circle of women who ran the foundation boards Carrie served on included Jackie.

“When I had lunch with her before Christmas, she’d been unusually quiet. In the past she’s mentioned that she’s been lonely and Derrick is never home.”

“Well, he wasn’t seeing other women. He was working.”

Brian knew his tone was defensive, but he was identifying with Derrick. He added, “She belonged to as many committees as you do. I don’t understand how she could be lonely.”

“Committees and volunteer work are not the same thing as intimate time with a spouse.”

Intimate time. Time in bed when a husband and wife coupled? Or was Carrie talking about conversations over dinner for two, an impromptu visit to the zoo, a walk in the rain? They hadn’t done any of those for a long time.

Peggy O’Brien and Carla Hammond were laughing as they came into the foyer. Peggy patted Carrie’s shoulder. “My, my, my. You two look much too serious. Is there a problem?”

Brian could see his wife consciously relax and find a smile for her guests. Once, she’d told him she’d had training in relaxation techniques. He supposed that had something to do with learning to pose for the camera.

Now he could almost believe she wasn’t still thinking about their conversation as she said to Peggy, “Dinner will be ready any minute. You can have your choice of wines to go with the seafood Newburgh and prime rib. The server will explain the merits of each. Let’s gather everyone and go into the dining room.”

Brian marveled at Carrie’s ease in turning the conversation to their guests. His wife definitely had tact. Maybe that came from having to referee three sisters vying for her parents’ attention.

However, although Carrie had changed the subject smoothly, it hadn’t left Brian’s mind—neither Derrick’s situation nor his wife’s comments.

Though Derrick was quieter than normal, conversation flowed smoothly over dinner. As usual the women spoke of charities, theater selections for the year, and new worthwhile causes. The men always turned to business. After German chocolate cake had been served, Rob focused his attention on Brian.

“I think it’s time we talk about what’s really on our minds. How are the Alaskan negotiations going?” Rob was an investment banker who worked closely with Brian.

“A bit touchy,” Brian admitted. “But I don’t see any major problems. I’m going to have to fly up there soon to do some reassuring in person.”

“I expected that,” Ted said. “The environment is important to them.” Ted worked for Brian, chasing down leads on real estate.

After Ted ate the last bite of his chocolate cake with gusto and took a sip of black coffee, he asked, “Are you interested in investing in more land in Hawaii? I’ve got wind of an entrepreneur who’s thinking about selling. You and Carrie could take a week, fly over there and see what it’s like. Danny Crosby was pleased with the deal you put together for him. Maybe he’d spread the word.”

Danny Crosby, the son of one of the richest families in Portland, had bought his own island and Brian had been instrumental in that. Danny was a man who had suffered the tragedies of his family deeply, and Brian had become friends with him through the man’s search for the right reclusive property. “Danny Crosby keeps to himself on his island.”

“But if he put the word out…” Ted prompted.

“I’m not going to take advantage of him or his family’s reputation. I will ask him if I can use him as a reference, though.”

“That in itself would be a plus,” Rob agreed. “The Crosby name has always carried weight, as much as the Logans’. By the way, I heard the Logans have donated even more money to Children’s Connection. Their coffers seem to be bottomless.”

The Logans were as rich as the Crosbys. Their involvement with the Children’s Connection adoption agency and fertility clinic went back years. Danny Crosby and Robbie Logan had been best friends as kids. But when six-year-old Robbie had been kidnapped from the Crosbys’ yard and Sheila Crosby, Danny’s mother, had been blamed, a feud had developed between the two families. Recovery for the Logans over the loss of their son had been slow, but they poured their passion and time into the adoption agency and the fertility clinic and gone on as best they could. He wasn’t sure the Crosbys would ever recover.

Addressing Carrie, Ted asked, “So how does a trip to Hawaii sound?”

Carrie’s gaze met Brian’s. “This isn’t a good time for me to get away.”

Before Ted could question her, loud music erupted from down the hall. Very loud music. All of their guests looked startled.

“What’s that?” Derrick asked. “Are you having a rap concert in your backyard?”

Suddenly Lisa with her geometrically designed red-and-blond hair—now half spiked, half flat—appeared in a T-shirt that looked as if it should be in a trash bin. Her jeans were tattered, too.

Carrie was out of her chair in a second, and Brian felt himself rising to his feet.

“I got hungry,” the teen mumbled, glancing around at everybody.

“I’m glad,” Carrie said with a smile, putting her arm around Lisa. Without hesitation, she said to the group at the table, “This is Lisa Sanders. She’s staying with us for a while. Lisa, meet Mr. and Mrs. Hammond, Mr. and Mrs. O’Brien, and Mr. Dennehy.”

Brian suspected his guests were still trying to recover from the shock of Lisa’s appearance.

Carrie excused herself and suggested to Lisa, “Come into the kitchen with me and I’ll get you a platter.”

As soon as his wife and Lisa disappeared, all eyes were on Brian. “Lisa’s thinking about giving up her baby for adoption, and we might adopt.”

“How long have you been planning this?” Peggy asked, speaking loud enough to be heard over the music.

“Not long. Lisa came to stay a few days ago.”

Carla leaned back in her chair and pushed her plate away with two bites of cake still on it. “You and Carrie tried in vitro, didn’t you?”

Brian didn’t like talking about his personal life this way, but he supposed Carrie had confided in these women. “Yes, we did.”

Peggy shook her head. “It’s a shame you have to resort to this.”

Although those had been Brian’s thoughts, he bristled. “Like all children, Lisa’s baby deserves a good home. Carrie and I can provide that.” Deciding to end the conversation right there, he rose to his feet. “I’ll see what’s keeping Carrie.”

As soon as he stepped into the kitchen, he was aware the caterer wasn’t making a platter for Lisa at all but stowing away the remains of the dinner. Carrie, however, was creating a thick sandwich while Lisa looked on.

“Did we eat all the prime rib?” he asked, trying to keep his voice tempered.

“Lisa just wanted something more simple.”

Lisa’s music still blared loudly into the whole house. “If you don’t mind, Lisa, I’m going to turn down the music.”

“I do mind. I’m listening to it.”

His patience wore thin. “Unfortunately, so are our guests. They’re trying to have a conversation.”

Lisa’s face grew defiant. “I suppose it would be better for you if I hadn’t come out at all. I saw the way they looked at me.”

Carrie dropped the butter knife she’d been using, and Lisa stooped to pick it up. When she tried to straighten, she wobbled.

Brian saw her losing her balance and he went to her quickly, helping her. “What’s wrong?”

“Just felt dizzy.” Her face had flushed and Brian didn’t like that.

“When did you last eat?” he asked.

“Around noon.” Her voice trailed off as she sagged against him.

Without thinking about it twice, he lifted her into his arms. “I’m taking her to her room.”

Looking scared, Lisa held on tightly. Suddenly Brian didn’t see the two-colored hair, the earrings, the tattoos. He saw a young girl whose world was swirling around her and she couldn’t seem to stop it.

The guest bedroom on the first floor was decorated in yellow and white and pink. A hand-quilted comforter in those colors lay across the bed while a white dust ruffle peeked out from under it. The yellow armchair in the corner of the room was a comfortable one and Brian could see that was where Lisa had apparently spent most of her time, since there was a romance novel and a few magazines spread around it. The CD player was still blaring and Carrie went to it, switching it off. She’d managed to grab the sandwich and a glass of milk.

Now as Brian laid Lisa on the bed, Carrie set the food on the nightstand and crouched down beside the teenager.

“Do you have a headache?” she asked as she pulled up Lisa’s jeans—to check her ankles for swelling, Brian guessed.

“No headache. Just a little dizzy.” At the dresser, Carrie opened one of the drawers and pulled out a blood pressure monitor. With a sideways glance at him, she said, “I bought it yesterday. Since Lisa was taken to the emergency room because her blood pressure was too high, I thought we’d better keep track of it.”

After she put the cuff around Lisa’s arm, she waited for the digital readout. A short time later the machine beeped. “It’s slightly elevated. I think you’d better rest for the evening.”

“I’m so bored,” Lisa groaned. “I’ve been reading and looking at magazines since I’ve been here. That’s the only CD I’ve kept and I’m tired of it. This baby is ruining my life!”

Brian sat down on the bed beside Lisa. “I don’t think it’s the baby who’s ruining your life. Circumstances are, and maybe a few wrong decisions on your part.”

Lisa glared at him. “You think you have all the right answers.”

Making an effort not to let her get to him, he replied, “There are a lot of problems to be solved here. You can’t do it all instantly or even overnight. If you want help, we’ll guide you in the right direction. You need to be thinking about what you want to do after your baby’s born. If you give it up for adoption—”

“You bet I’m giving it up for adoption. I don’t want to take care of it all day and all night. I want—”

Tears came into her eyes, and Brian actually felt sorry for her. Maybe this was how Carrie had felt toward the teenager since their first meeting.

“What do you want?” he asked in a low voice.

“What I want can never happen. I want my parents back. I want my body back.”

Carrie spoke softly from the other side of the bed. “I’m sorry about your parents, Lisa. I can only imagine how you feel—absolutely alone with no one to hold on to. But you don’t have to be alone now. We want to help.”

There was a slight rap on the door, and Peggy stepped inside. “Is there something wrong? Is there anything we can do?”

Brian suspected Peggy didn’t want anything to do as much as she wanted to see what was going on. She was the typical social butterfly and he often doubted her sincerity. “We have everything under control. Carrie and I will be out in a couple of minutes. Tell Rob to help himself to some of that cognac on the buffet.”

“The caterer just set out divine liqueurs. We didn’t want to start without you.”

“Go right ahead. We’ll join you shortly.”

With a last look at Lisa, Peggy left the room, high heels clicking on the hardwood floor.

After Carrie stood, she picked up the sandwich on the nightstand and offered it to Lisa. “You’ve got to eat regular meals, too. It will help. I’ll stay here and keep you company while Brian goes back to our guests.”

That wasn’t an option Brian preferred. “I can bring a TV in here from the guest room upstairs. Then you won’t have to stay.”

Carrie’s dark eyes met his. “The TV’s a good idea. But I want to make sure Lisa’s over her dizziness. I’m sure everyone will understand.”

He wasn’t sure they would understand. There was a time when Carrie wouldn’t have considered bailing out of one of his social functions. “Can I talk to you in the hall for a minute?”

Lisa was eating the sandwich and Carrie told her, “I’ll be right back.”

Brian moved away from the door and kept his voice low. “She’s fine, Carrie. I’ll bring down the TV and you can look in on her every once in a while.”

“We made a mistake by not including her in the dinner party.”

“The dinner party is a business function. Why would we include her?”

“Because she’s alone and she’s looking for a place to belong.”

“You belong with our guests,” he said, a firmness shading his voice.

“They’re your guests, Brian. This is your business function. After the cordials, Peggy and Carla will talk about fashion shows while you, Derrick, Ted and Rob plan how you can make your next million. I don’t think my absence from that discussion is going to be a great loss.”

There was a fire in Carrie when she became protective of Lisa. She’d never spoken to him this way before. Part of him was annoyed that she wasn’t living up to her part of her commitment as his wife. Yet another part of him was fascinated by the independent woman she’d apparently kept hidden inside. The huge question was why.

“Tell me something, Carrie. Do you really want to spend time with Lisa? Or do you just want to escape chitchat with the O’Briens and Hammonds?”

After only a moment’s hesitation, Carrie spoke softly. “If Lisa lets us adopt her child, in a way she’ll become family. It’s important for me to get to know her. It’s important for her to feel that she’s not a stray we just dragged in. Can’t you see that? Can’t you see that family has to come before business?”

What he saw was that Carrie was changing. With adopting a baby, their lives would change. He’d never had to be flexible. Since he was a kid, he’d been determined to make something of himself as his father hadn’t. He’d set his course and stayed on it. Right was right, wrong was wrong and success made a man’s life worthwhile. Even when Carrie had entered the picture, his life hadn’t taken any radical turns. She’d fit in. She’d gone along. He was beginning to realize their marriage had always been about what he wanted, not what Carrie wanted. Is that why she’d always held back a part of herself? Was she afraid to let her independence and self-assurance emerge in the wake of his more substantial goals?

Figuring all of that into the equation, he said, “I’ll make your excuses. But I’m also going to go upstairs and get that TV. If Lisa decides to turn silent on you, she can watch it and you can come back out and say good-night. Fair enough?”

“Fair enough,” Carrie murmured.

When Brian headed for the stairs, he felt his wife’s gaze on him and he realized he’d give that million dollars Carrie had mentioned to know exactly what she was thinking.

Early the next morning, Brian slipped out of bed, pulled on jogging shorts and went to the exercise room in the basement to work out. Last night, Carrie had never returned to their guests. She’d still been in Lisa’s room when he’d bid them good-night. Afterward, he’d worked in his office until he’d heard her exit the teenager’s room. When they’d gone up to bed together, there had been a strain between them and they’d stayed on separate sides of the bed. He hadn’t reached for her and she hadn’t turned to him. He wasn’t sure what was happening. He just knew something was.

He thought about what Derrick had said. It came out of the blue. Maybe that wasn’t so unusual. Maybe husbands and wives never did really know what the other was thinking.

After an extralong workout on the Nautilus and a one-sided match with the punching bag, Brian showered downstairs and dressed in sweats he kept there. When he went up to the kitchen, Carrie was beating eggs with a whisk.

“Would you like scrambled eggs?” she asked. “Lisa isn’t up, but I’m hoping when she smells the bacon and toast, she’ll join us.”

Carrie hadn’t dressed yet. She wore an ice-blue silk robe over a matching nightgown. As always, she looked feminine and elegant, so beautiful his chest hurt just looking at her.

“Breakfast for two would be nice, too,” he offered, tired of the discord between them.

When Carrie’s gaze met his, she sighed. “I didn’t mean to let you down last night. But Lisa and I began talking and I thought that was more important. She’s afraid, Brian. Afraid of the pain of labor and delivery, afraid of what’s going to happen afterward, afraid she’s never going to be able to afford an apartment or get a job.”

He didn’t want this conversation to be about Lisa but rather about them. Throughout the night he’d tossed and turned over all of it. “I understand why you want to help Lisa. You want her baby.”

“It’s more than that! I’m not just trying to win her over. I care about her.”

He could see that she did and wondered how she could care so easily. “All right, you care. I just don’t want you to get hurt while you’re caring.”

“This is one time when I’m going to take the risk and maybe you’ll have to, too.”

Although he tolerated risks every day he did business, he’d never had to tolerate them in his personal life. “Do you have something particular in mind?”

She flushed. “Yes. I’m taking Lisa to an obstetrician tomorrow afternoon. Dr. Grieb will probably do a sonogram. I thought maybe you’d like to come along and see the baby we might be adopting.”

He knew exactly what Carrie was doing. She wanted to make this baby a reality. Their reality. “What time is the appointment?”

“Three o’clock.”

He knew his appointments tomorrow were stacked back to back because of being out of town last week. “I’ll do my best to clear my calendar, and I’ll try to meet you there.”

This appointment was important to Carrie, and he suddenly understood how it might be terrifically important to him, too.