Читать книгу A Forever Family Collection - Коллектив авторов - Страница 25

IT WAS just how he’d imagined it would be. A beautiful, light, airy house with gorgeous views over the ocean. Complete with white picket fence surrounding the garden. And the family to complete it.

It disturbed him a little. She was living in the house he’d always imagined her having. And everything about it was perfect, from the beautiful wooden floors and wide open spaces to the bright, carefully planted flowerbeds and sandpit in the front garden. Abby led him through the wide hallway to the kitchen at the back of the house. It was huge, with thick wooden worktops, a white Boston sink and a couple of easy chairs looking out of the patio doors over the back garden.

‘Abby, just how big is this house?’

She gave a little smile. ‘Big enough.’

‘No, seriously, Abby, my apartment in Washington could fit in here six times over.’

She leaned back against her sink, crossing her arms over her chest. ‘Well, there’s this, the kitchen/diner, then I have two separate sitting rooms at the front and a study, a cloakroom and a laundry room. Upstairs there are five bedrooms, two en suites and a family bathroom.’

‘Wow. This place is huge.’ He cleared his throat a little. ‘Without being cheeky, did you win the lottery?’

She laughed. ‘I wish. Why would you think that?’

‘Because this house is pretty near “Millionaires’ Row” in Mendocino Valley. This place couldn’t have come cheap.’

Abby walked over to the nearby stove and lifted the lid on a pot, inhaling deeply and giving it a stir. ‘Actually, it came really cheap. I inherited it, it was my aunt’s.’

His brow furrowed. ‘Your aunt? I don’t remember you talking about an aunt.’

‘She was really my mom’s best friend. This was her house. She never married and she never had any children. She was a writer. Do you remember those children’s books with the big spider on the front?’

Luke gave a little nod. ‘I remember you had a set of those on the bookshelves in our apartment.’

Abby walked over to a small bookcase next to one of the easy chairs looking out over the back garden. She pulled out a set of books with a big pink spider on the front. ‘She wrote these nearly forty years ago and it made her a fortune. That’s how she could afford this house. When she died she left it to me.’

Luke walked over next to her and looked out over the equally perfect back garden. ‘God, I would kill for a place like this, Abby. It’s gorgeous.’

Abby nodded, then turned back to the stove and gave the contents of the pot another stir. ‘You’re right, it is gorgeous. The perfect place to bring up a family.’

The words hung in the air between them. A thousand things unsaid. A thousand questions unanswered and misunderstood.

The hairs on her arms stood on end. Would he speak? Would he say anything about the past? About why he would never consider the other options to have children?

No, nothing. Luke said nothing, His eyes drifted from the garden to the kitchen stove and then to his feet.

She tapped him on the shoulder. ‘Come on upstairs and I’ll show you to your room.’ She bent to pick up his case.

Luke moved quickly. ‘Don’t be silly, I’ll carry that.’ His hand encircled hers and their eyes locked for a second. His pale blue eyes with her warm brown ones. Abby flinched, not really understanding why. She pulled her hand back.

‘Come this way.’ She led him up the white-painted stairs and into a corridor with white walls and a pale blue carpet. His eyes were drawn immediately to the beautiful round stained-glass window at the end of the corridor. The sun was streaming through the window, sending a cavalcade of rainbow hues pooling on the white walls.

‘You’ve got a stained-glass window?’ A few quick strides took him to the end of the corridor to touch the coloured glass. He peered at the image in the window. ‘Flowers? What are these?’

Abby touched them in turn. ‘The yellow ones are daffodils and the blue ones are bluebells. My aunt was born in Scotland and she used to live next to some fields that were full of these flowers. She got the window made to remind her of home.’

He looked down the corridor. The window at the other end was the same round shape and size, but only plain glass.

‘How come she didn’t do that one?’

Abby smiled. ‘She meant to—she just didn’t get around to it. I’ve always meant to do it myself. I’d love to have a field of colourful freesias—lots of reds, pinks and purples. But stained glass is just so expensive, and I’ve been distracted by other things.’

Luke nodded slowly. Having a sick child could steal every minute of your day. ‘That’s some piece of history.’ He glanced around at some of the open doors. ‘Which one is mine?’

Abby walked over to the furthest away door. ‘In here.’

The room had pale blue walls, a wooden floor and white bedspread. Beautiful and homely, if a little impersonal. She walked over to the window. ‘I thought you might like the room with the view.’

And there it was, the beautiful ocean view that only a house sitting on the hills could capture.

Abby smiled as she saw Luke take a deep breath. She pointed downwards. ‘There’s even a window seat.’

He gave a little nod. ‘The view’s gorgeous, Abby.’ He watched the waves breaking in the ocean beneath them. People paid a fortune for a view like this. Abby had certainly landed on her feet.

‘You’ve got to let me thank you for this.’

‘What do you mean?’

‘For letting me stay here.’

She gave a playful smile. ‘It might only be for the one night, Luke. I throw guests out for bad behaviour, you know.’

He reached over and took her hand. ‘I know that there’s a hospital barbeque tonight. Do you want to go to that?’

She shook her head. ‘No. I try not to socialise too much at those kinds of things. They tend to be more for the adults.’ Her eyes glanced downwards to the garden where Reuben was playing and he immediately understood. She wanted to spend some time with her son.

‘How about if you let me take you somewhere local for dinner, then?’ He lifted his hand as she went to interrupt. ‘We could go out later, once you’ve put Reuben to bed, and you could ask Lucy to come back for a few hours. How about that?’

Abby nodded slowly. A late dinner would be fine. It would give her a chance to bath Reuben and put him to bed. Actually, a late dinner would be kind of nice. She couldn’t remember the last time she had gone to dinner with someone.

The front door opened and slammed again as Reuben came running inside.

‘Where are you, Mommy?’ His little voice drifted upstairs.

‘I’m here, honey.’ She crossed into the corridor and leaned over the balustrade. ‘I was just showing Dr Luke his room.’

‘Dr Luke is staying tonight? Whoopee! Can he play cars?’

Luke shifted uncomfortably. Kids weren’t his specialty and he didn’t routinely spend time in their company. What if Reuben hated him?

He turned as Abby gave him a weak smile. ‘Welcome to the madhouse.’

Luke pushed open the door to the restaurant and was immediately hit by the aromas of Mexican food. His stomach growled loudly and Abby laughed.

‘That’s twice in one day. Are you hungry, Luke?’

‘Starving. I take it you know this place well?’

She gave a little smile. ‘Of course I do. We eat here nearly every week.’ She walked to the back of the restaurant and shouted through the doors to the kitchen, ‘Diego, sorry we’re late. Reuben wouldn’t go to bed.’

Luke could hear some muffled response and Abby led him to a red and white chequered table near the front of the restaurant. There were several other couples in the eatery, all at various stages of dinner, many huddled over flickering red candles on the tabletops, several of whom raised their hands, waving at Abby.

Luke felt something strange in his stomach. Uneasiness. Abby had a whole range of friends and acquaintances that he knew nothing about. She’d built a life for herself and for Reuben in this friendly little community. Five years ago they’d moved in the same circles and had had the same group of friends. Now everything had changed and he knew nothing about the life that she led.

A tall Mexican man appeared at their table, carrying a pitcher of water and two glasses. ‘It’s nice to see you again.’ He bent over and kissed Abby on the cheek. ‘Here you go, Abby.’ He placed the glasses and pitcher on the table and winked at Luke. ‘In preparation for the extra-hot food she likes.’

Abby gave a wide smile. ‘Can I have a diet soda too, please, Diego?’ She glanced over at Luke. ‘What would you like?’

‘Diet soda’s fine for me too, thanks.’ His eyes swept around the restaurant, noticing there were no menus or wine lists on the table. And almost instantly he understood. This wasn’t the type of establishment where you ordered. You only told them whether you liked your food medium, hot or very hot. His head tilted towards Diego. ‘So what’s on the menu tonight, then?’

‘Aha, that will be a surprise for the lovely couple.’ He pointed at them both. ‘Do you have any allergies the kitchen should know about, sir?’

Luke shook his head.

‘And how spicy do you like your food?’

His eyes swept over the pitcher of iced water already on the table. Last time he’d gone for dinner with Abby she wouldn’t even order a curry.

‘I’ll have what she’s having,’ he said with confidence.

She flung back her head and laughed. ‘I warn you, Luke, my tastes have changed in the last few years. I doubt you’ll be able to keep up.’

‘Is that a challenge?’

She leaned back in her chair. ‘It could be.’ She reached over and touched Diego’s hand. ‘I’ll leave this all in your capable hands.’

He gave a little nod and headed off towards the kitchen.

Abby lifted the pitcher and poured some iced water into the two glasses. ‘So what have you been doing in Washington, Luke?’

He raised his eyebrow. ‘I think we better start with what you’ve been doing for the last five years, Abby.’

She shifted under his steady gaze. This was about Reuben again. Why was he so astonished that she’d adopted a child? She’d never made any secret of the fact she wanted to have children.

‘I would have thought that was obvious, Luke. I found the job of my dreams, inherited the house of my dreams and was able to realise my own personal dream and adopt a child.’ She took a sip from her glass of water. ‘I think you could say I’ve been pretty busy.’

He watched as she brushed her blonde hair back from her face. She’d changed into a light summer dress and cardigan before they’d walked down to the restaurant. And he could smell the strawberry lip gloss again. But his eyes had caught sight of something else. A thin gold chain around her neck, holding a gold locket that dipped into her cleavage. Before he could stop himself, he reached over, lifted the delicate chain and caught the locket between his lean fingers. ‘You still wear this?’

Her cheeks flushed gently with colour.

‘I thought you would have thrown it away years ago.’

Her fingers touched his, lifting the locket from him. He’d bought it for her years earlier and it used to hold a picture of them together inside.

‘Why would I get rid of it? I always loved this locket.’ Her fingernails caught the edge and split it open. ‘I’ve just got a different picture inside it now.’

She turned the locket towards him. A picture of a mischievous little boy with blond hair and a red T-shirt grinned back at him.

The words caught in Luke’s throat. Again, it was as if he was gazing at a picture from his past. He cleared his throat. ‘Reuben. That’s a lovely picture.’

Her eyes fell downwards. ‘Yes, it is, isn’t it?’ She gave him a sad smile. ‘It seemed most appropriate. After all, lockets are supposed to hold the picture of the ones most dear to your heart. Aren’t they?’

Their picture had been replaced by a child’s. Did that mean she didn’t have room in her heart for anyone else?

The silence was broken as Diego reappeared and placed some steaming bowls on the table along with a basket of rolls. ‘Here we go, folks, pumpkin and chorizo soup.’

Luke leaned over the bowl and breathed deeply. ‘That smells fantastic, Diego, and not at all what I expected.’

Abby gave Diego a little nod. ‘Many thanks, Diego.’ She reached for one of the bolillo rolls served with the soup. ‘I’ve learned to expect the unexpected coming here. There’s always something just a little quirky.’ She blew on the spoonful of soup she’d just lifted from the bowl, before taking a sip. ‘Wow, you can taste the garlic, cumin and oregano. This is gorgeous.’

Luke reached over and broke open one of the crusty bolillo rolls, dipping it into his soup. ‘So are you going to tell me any more about how you got here?’

Abby shook her head. She didn’t feel like getting into all that. Especially not in the middle of a restaurant. Her hand went automatically to the locket around her neck. Luke had no idea that his picture was still in there, underneath the picture of Reuben. Still close to her heart.

‘I think it’s time we talk about you, Luke.’

He put his spoon down. ‘What do you want to talk about?’

‘I want to know how you’ve been these last five years. Why you felt you couldn’t keep in touch. Why you ignored every email and message I left you.’

Luke could feel the hairs on his arms stand on end at her questions. She hadn’t raised her voice or caused a scene. She’d just asked the questions in her normal, matter-of-fact manner. But how could he tell her that she’d broken his heart when she’d walked away? He’d pretended that it was all about the fact she’d wanted children and he hadn’t. And he’d kept his defences high, because it had been the only way to get through it.

‘I told you earlier I thought it was best if we had a clean break, Abby. There was no point in sending constant emails or talking on the phone. We both agreed that we wanted different things.’

‘Wanting different things didn’t mean we couldn’t be friends.’

‘It was too hard. I needed to focus on my career.’ Then he hesitated. ‘It’s like I tried to say earlier, if we’d kept in touch it would have been difficult for either of us to move on. I know you were just trying to be friendly, but to go from what we had… to being friends—it was just a step too far for me. I needed a clean break. I thought it would be best for you too. I thought you would meet someone else and have the family you always wanted.’ He met her eyes in the flickering candlelight. ‘It broke my heart when you walked away.’

Silence. So quiet you could have heard a pin drop.

Abby put down her spoon and reached out and touched his hand. ‘I didn’t leave because you couldn’t have children, Luke. I left because you wouldn’t even have that discussion with me. You wouldn’t even consider the possibilities.’ Her fingers traced a line up from his wrist to his palm. It felt like, right now, she had to be touching him. She really wanted to plant herself in his lap and wrap her arms around his shoulders—but there was a table in the way. ‘You broke my heart too, you know?’

‘I know,’ he whispered. ‘I just didn’t expect this.’

‘Expect what?’

He pulled his hand back and sat back in his chair. ‘You, to have a family—like this. I thought you would have met someone, got married and been pregnant.’

Abby felt the hairs stand up on the back of her neck. She could say a hundred things here. Tears glistened in her eyes. But there was only one thing she wanted to say. It didn’t matter how inappropriate it was. It didn’t matter that Luke was only here for a few days. He was here, right now, for the first time in five years.

She sucked in a deep breath. ‘How could I do that, Luke? How could I meet someone else and fall in love? My heart was always going to belong to you.’

‘Wow.’ She saw his shoulders tense.

‘Wow? That’s all you can say—wow?’

A sexy smile spread across his face. He stood up, leaned across the table and planted a kiss straight on her surprised lips.

‘Sometimes actions speak louder than words, Abby.’ He sat back down in his chair.

The way he staring at her was unnerving her. She didn’t feel as if she was sitting in a restaurant. She felt as if they were the only two people in the room.

Abby went to speak but Diego appeared from out of nowhere to remove the plates from their table. ‘You enjoy, yes?’

Abby nodded in response, trying to break the heavy silence. ‘What’s next?’ she asked.

‘Our specialty, fajitas.’

‘My favourite. Fab, thanks, Diego.’ She watched as he sauntered back to the kitchen. She gulped. Time to change the subject. ‘How’s your relationship with your parents these days?’

The warmth between them vanished in an instant. His icy blue eyes met hers. ‘How do you think it is?’

She shrugged. Absolutely the wrong thing to say. It was obvious there was no improvement, but she’d never found out why and after all this time it felt as if it was time to dig a little deeper.

‘I think I don’t know, Luke, because you’ve never talked about it. But we’re five years older and five years wiser.’ She reached across the table and caught his hand in hers. ‘So do you want to tell me what’s so bad about them?’

‘You’ve met them, you should understand.’

Her brow furrowed. ‘Yes, I’ve met them and thought they were a little cold. But I never really got to know them.’

‘Lucky you,’ he mumbled.

She squeezed his hand a little harder. ‘That seems a strange thing to say about your parents.’

Luke threw his hands up. ‘Well, they’re not exactly regular parents, are they? Ryan and I hardly saw them when we were kids. The life of a senator is very busy. I knew my nanny better than I knew my parents.’

‘That’s horrible.’

She could feel the tension in the air. There was an inevitable question that followed that statement. ‘How were they when Ryan was sick?’

‘Busy. They were always busy.’ The words were almost spat out.

Abby swallowed hard. ‘Too busy to look after their child when he was sick?’ The words were alien to her, almost filled with disbelief. She’d been in the situation herself and couldn’t imagine a parent not wanting to be at their child’s sickbed.

The look of disgust on Luke’s face was evident. ‘They were hardly ever there. Do you know the first time Ryan needed a bone-marrow aspiration my mother ran from the room and left me there with Ryan? I’ve never forgiven her for that. They went to a few hospital appointments, spoke to a few doctors and then carried on with business as usual. I was more of a parent to Ryan than they were. I went with Ryan for all his treatments— well, most of them.’ The words were left hanging in the air.

Luke hadn’t moved. He was still lost in his thoughts. Her fingertips brushed over the top of his clenched fist that lay on the table. He blinked at the feather-like touch, automatically releasing his hand.

‘You said most of them?’

‘What?’ Her touch had jerked him back out of that black place. The one where he was a teenager, laden with responsibility and guilt. Trying to fill the space left by two absent adults. Her dark brown eyes were pulling him in, pulling him into a place he didn’t want to go to.

She was doing it again. Looking at him as though she could see right into the heart of the matter, right into his soul. Her fingers were now concentrating on his outstretched index finger, running gently up and down it in a soothing manner.

‘You said most of the time. I kind of get the impression you’ve not said everything you need to. Were you with Ryan when he died?’

His fingers clenched again, hiding themselves inside his fist. Abby wanted to pull the words back into her mouth. A dark and heavy cloud loomed over them. She knew the answer to that question without him even having to formulate a sentence.

‘I wasn’t allowed to be with Ryan. It was about the only time my parents did finally come home.’

Her mind tried to make sense of what he’d just said. ‘What do you mean, you weren’t allowed?’

She could see his heavy eyelids. She knew that behind them there were tears forming. Please don’t let me see him cry.

‘That’s when I had mumps. I couldn’t be near Ryan when he was immunocompromised. So I had to phone my mom and dad and ask them to come home.’ He ran his fingers through his hair. ‘They were their usual busy selves. I don’t think any of us realised just how sick Ryan actually was.’

Abby stretched her arms across the table and took both his hands again. He could see the pain in her eyes, the empathy from a mother who could find herself in that position too.

‘I hope you’re both hungry.’ Diego appeared, placing sizzling platters of chicken and beef on the table. Abby drew her hands back, fixing a smile on her face as he added the additional pots of guacamole, salsa, sour cream and cheese. The fajitas came in a covered dome to keep them warm. ‘Enjoy!’ he announced, oblivious to the tension at the table, as he retreated towards the kitchen.

She fixed her eyes on Luke as his eyes took in the spread on the table. Had he been about to say something else? What a terrible burden for a teenage boy, to feel as if he’d let his brother down when he’d needed him most.

She watched as he lifted one of the side plates and started to ladle food onto it. ‘You know it wasn’t your fault, right?’

He stopped, a spoonful of salsa between his plate and the serving dish.

‘You know that it wasn’t your fault you were sick? Anyone can get sick at any time.’

Luke set the spoon down on his plate. Abby had never seen his pale blue eyes so serious. ‘I know that the last time I saw my brother I promised him I would teach him how to play poker. I didn’t get the chance.’

‘But you were a teenager, Luke. You couldn’t have known how seriously ill he was.’

‘Actually, I could have. I was the one having all the conversations with the doctors. I was the one that saw him on a daily basis and could see the deterioration in his condition. You know what the first words my mother said to me were? Why didn’t you tell me he was so sick? From my mother!’

Abby took a deep breath. Luke had never really spoken about this before. And she didn’t want him to stop. This was good for him. This was good for them. The thought came out of nowhere. Why was she thinking about them? There was no them. There hadn’t been for five years.

‘Luke, your parents should never have left you in that position. As an adult, you must see that now? You must realise how unfair that was.’

He shook his head. ‘I don’t want to talk about it any more,’ he mumbled as he bent to spoon some of the chicken and salsa mixture into his mouth.

A smile crept across her face. In part, to welcome the light relief that was about to come. She watched as the realisation hit Luke as the taste receptors in his mouth went into overdrive. He started to choke and splutter, tears forming in his eyes and streaming down his cheeks.

She pulled his glass over and refilled it with icy water, pushing it towards him and folding her arms across her chest. ‘Hot enough for you, Mr Smarty Pants? I’ll have what she’s having.’

Luke covered his mouth with his napkin as he continued to choke, grabbing the glass and drinking thirstily. He thumped it back on the table and eyed her suspiciously. ‘You knew, didn’t you? You knew exactly how strong it was going to be?’

‘I did warn you my tastes have changed. Why do you think Diego brought us a pitcher of iced water?’

His brain went into overdrive. She’d just said it again, her tastes had changed. Did that mean him? ‘I just thought he was being polite. I didn’t think he was trying to set me on fire!’

‘Do you want me to ask him for something a little milder for you?’ The words were like a challenge being thrown down. ‘You were the one, after all, who used to say I didn’t have the palate for spicy food.’

‘No, of course not. This will be fine.’ The glint appeared back in his eyes. ‘I can out-eat you anywhere. I just need another pitcher of water.’

Abby gave a smile and signalled to Diego. ‘Then let the challenge begin.’